I'm actually in a very similar position as you are, but yet somewhat different. Personally, I think that I might have somewhat of a minor fear of getting ahead, so that may be one thing slowing me down. The more knowledge one has, the less likely one is to find people similar to them. For the first two years of secondary school, I was completely alone without anyone to speak to. My cycle was "Wake up, School, homework, free time, sleep". Further over time, I lost more motivation for schoolwork, though I still passed my classes. Though in school, I looked happy, cheerful, showing positive emotions, I was depressed over how I never had any friends. Though I have a very good companion today, I get depressed whenever I think of how in post secondary, any bonds made in high school will most likely be lost. After university, any bonds made will once again; likely be lost, since people go different ways. I learned so much more from the Discovery Channel, Nova, documentaries, and my own parents than I could ever hope to learn in school. Division was barely taught in grade five, and squares and square roots until 7th grade. Looking back to elementary and who I considered friends, they were more akin to "people who weren't anuses towards me". My somewhat unsocial behavior likely comes from the constant bullying I endured during that time, but I still wanted someone to relate to. Due to that, I got a very short temper. One thing that didn't help was mt 5th grade teacher that said that horrible little phrase that spoke of "sticks and stones" when any verbal torture occurred. Even before that, no teacher took my cries or the others' actions seriously since they thought that "Kids don't know what's right of wrong". Kids aren't idiots. It makes me both sad and furious that one of a few people I knew from elementary, who was an honor student; He received all As, and is the one carving male genitals in to the newly painted walls of the new school wing. At the moments that I'm pondering over things such as morality in philosophy, aircraft design, and whatever else; other (males) are having pissing contests and throwing obscenities seemingly every tenth word. I never pursued any friendships with females since my father constantly said that males and female can't have friendship and any sight of it simply means the male wants to seduce the female. (Now, that I look back, I'd likely be more able to connect with them) I, myself would like to do something beneficial to the world, but I'm slowly losing more motivation. Another obstacle facing me is what career to pursue. I want to do all I can! I'd like to become an aerospace engineer, quantum physicist, indie game developer, animator, astronomer, continue the family company- ...but all I have is 700,000 hours in total from beginning of life to the end. 550,000 hours left in total and about 377,000 hours when I account for time lost during sleep- ...I suppose I got a bit off track from the original topic... Sorry.