Kerbal Origins and background

[vestradeus]

This is my take on the kerbal origins and the backstory I have in my head for my latest play through (which will have some after action reports come as well!).

 

 

Kerbal origins:

Not that Kerbals know this, but they are not entirely native to their planet. They are the product of a native algae that had a chance encounter with a sock from another dimension (when you wash socks, and one goes missing, they wind up in strange places...this one ended up on Kerbin - and had once belonged to a Human astronaut). The algae and residual human DNA combined and almost made something really cool...but instead it was just a more confused algae. It was not until this new algae absorbed some mysterious goo which had crash landed, that things really started to shape up - kerbal shapes to be specific.
 

Kerbals, now roughly bipedal, walking talking algae had an odd characteristic from their mix of DNA - the desire to see the stars! Or at least a few of them did, and so started to intuitively build random things until they got to the point we all know and love - various companies of kerbals building an assortment of items that may or may not be helpful to lob things toward the sky.
 

Every so often, a space kraken appears, see's the chaos that is kerbalkind, and destroys everything. What the Kraken does not know is that some of these kerbals have the ability to regenerate, and thus re-appear and re-start the whole thing over, as if nothing was amiss (Bill Kerman has even figured out how to do this on demand for a few of his favorite Kerbals...and thus no matter how blown up they get, they still come in to work at some point).

 

 

Backstory:

Previous attempts at space flight were largely based on the idea that the sun and star's light tasted this good here, stuck on a planet, then it was probably extra tasty up close. This of course led to some unfortunate near-Kerbol events that no one got to write much about as all involved were incinerated. Thus things got put on hold for awhile.

 

But then they found the Goo. It was while crashing in the south polar region they came across a meteorite with this Goo in it (little did they know this was the same goo that made them...well sentient is kinda stretching it...). They tested it, they poked and probed it, they played it music, and fed it cheese. It was determined to be a life form, and after a wild party one night (and trying to get the goo to hook up with some jell-o shots) it was decided that the goo probably wanted to go home.
 

Wherever that was...
 

In support of this idea, which had quickly gone viral, the Alliance of Combined Kerbals (ACK) (the moderately effective joint government over the otherwise independent algae colonies) decided to put all available resources into building a new Kerbal Space Center located on the equator, and even upgraded an old island airfield for support. They poured every credit and bit of knowledge they could into these facilities, attempting to foresee every possible need.
 

And then then they washed their hands of the entire thing.

Going to space was not a program that ACK wanted to run. They had conducted many studies and concluded that kerbalkind loved watching their fellow Kerbals face dangerous situations, like riding rockets and jets around, but they were not so excited to see those same Kerbals explode and die horribly.  Danger good, death on planetary TV bad.
 

So with a brand new facility, it was left to private industry to run a space program intent on SCIENCE!, exploration and ultimately, getting the goo home.
 

One such company stepped up to run the program - Rogue Airmen Rockets (RAR). They hired everyone who'd had anything to do with prior space programs, including the original four kerbonauts, and set up contracts with every company willing to produce hardware. ACK agreed to fund RAR if they continued to produce SCIENCE!, since it wasn't on their hands if some poor Kerbal exploded. Basically they were willing to pay to outsource the PR risk as well as the actual program management. 

 

As the government was footing the bill, there was no need for efficiency in terms of funds; instead the focus was on learning as much as possible, as fast as possible, to get Kerbals into space, learn about the cosmos and develop the technologies required for interplanetary exploration. Anyone willing to help this grand effort is bestowed the rank of Kerman (its a rank, not a lat name), and anyone holding such a beloved title gets free drinks most anywhere.

Thus the Kermen began the new Kerbal Space Program....