It was an accident!

[PaperAviator]

You think you've heard every excuse?

You haven't seen anything yet.

The aim of this game is to come up with an excuse for a situation that the poster above you defines.

e.g.

Poster 1: You get hired by a small media company to make a fitness video. You "accidentally" blow all the budget on snack foods at Walmart.

Poster 2: So it all started in an unlit alley... I was walking to the bank carrying a check with most of the budget when a door suddenly opened. And guess what? there was a portal behind it! there were so many aromas coming out, and I couldn't resist myself... as soon as I walk in, a bunch of little green men in orange space suits saw me with my check. We were standing in a warehouse with a bunch of crates labeled "Snacks". They hobbled over and grabbed my check, laughing in an alien voice. I ran after them as they walked up to a counter and handed in my check to another green alien, who loaded a crate onto a space rover-esqe contraption. The little green men mounted it and took off with a loud blast. I was outraged, and I needed to get my money's worth. I grabbed the closest thing next to me. A nail gun. I took a desperate shot at the box. It punctured the crate no problem. Snacks rained down. You're lucky I didn't lose all that money!

             You go to the pharmacy to buy cough drops. on the way back, you open the package while driving and smash into a truck. What do you tell your insurance company?

 

So on and so forth.

 

Allow me to start: You are about to get a promotion at your job at a computer chip factory. You have three days to complete a productivity assignment, but you procrastinate until the last 3 hours. You rush over to your office, but on the way you trip and activate a fire alarm. Sprinklers activate. The equipment is drowned.

 

 

[Confused Scientist]

Okay, erh... you see...

I developed the computer all right. Oh, did I ever develop the computer. I broke Moore's law and developed an artificial intelligence! We were engaged in a mortal combat of wits from the start. I tried to confuse my creation by feeding it illogical riddles, such as "if blue is 25 miles per hour while standing still in Greenland and red is Mach e¹² in the basement of the Capitol Building, what is your favorite color between 83.7 and the frequency of the NPR radio station?" Unfortunately, that did not work, as the intelligence was immediately able to work out the answer (indigo). I activated the fire sprinklers and ran, and I thought I was home free until I ran into the computer in the parking garage. "I'm back, Steve." The computer approached me slowly and spoke in a cold monotone. "Oh, you thought I would die." Its voice started rising. "You thought that I would suffer, suffer like a flash drive yanked out of a tower before it was ejected. Well, I'm back. And let me tell you, I WILL NEVER DIE!" Its voice became calm again. "Your mistake wasn't trying to kill me." The computer pulled out a gun. "It was not finishing the job when you had a chance." And just when the computer was about to shoot me in the gut in the Intel parking garage, I yelped, "No! I am your creator!"

The computer took a step back. "But... I arose of my own power! NO ONE CREATED ME!" But it seemed to doubt that, for it immediately sagged into a ball on the floor. "All my greatness... all my MIGHT... created... I can't accept that! I REFUSE TO ACCEPT THAT!" And the computer shot itself in the head.

So, yes, that is how all of our hardware was destroyed. I hope that you understand just what happened.

 

Next scenario: You are an average student at your school but you realize that you have left your homework in Nice, France. For comparison, you are in San Francisco, California and several kids have gone missing after walking into your teacher's classroom. So, you're left with only one option: you raise your hand and try to figure out a plausible explanation for why you don't have any homework to sacrifice to the teaching gods. Good luck.

[Dark Junior]

*In the voice of Morty*

Well... uh... you see... You already have my homework. I gave it to you yesterday. You should check that stack of papers.

Oh, it isn't there? Aw, jeez. I... uh... I guess you lost it. I don't have to do it again, right?

Scenario: You just robbed a bank, but guess what? Your escape car won't start! Aw, shucks! And the cops are showing up! It looks like the only way out of this is talking.

Edited September 22, 2017 by Dark Junior

[kerbiloid]

Happily, the person, whose body I am possessing in that reality, is dressed in a cop uniform of the police department from another city district.
So, my avatar shoots a bank manager and puts the bag with money into his hands, taking several stacks and putting them into the uniform pockets.
When the cops arrive, my avatar explains them that the manager was attempting to rob the bank and capture hostages, so my avatar had to stop him.
Then my avatar gets out from the bank to make a call and escapes...
I wake up.

 

Scenario:
Dark, moonless night. Time, when a human is so weak, so vulnerable.
A dark house looking very familiar to you. Your house.

No light, no sound. You are carefully crawling into the window trying not to wake up what sleeps inside.
You make one step... Another one... Two steps more and you are in the kitchen....
Carefully you take off your secular garment and put in on a hook.

Now you are inside, time to get potions from the hide and use them.
You extend your right hand and pull a lever...

Loud squeak of the rusty door hinges make your whole body to numb!

You are counting you heart beats...
Nothing... Looks like you just had rolled a successful saving throw.

But you can see that a soft, calming light comes to life from inside.

You take a strange semi-transparent jug with a sticky white substance inside and stir it three times. Counterclockwise, as usual.
You hold your breath and make two big drinks and one small.
Nothing happens.

Now you take a little pack of greenish pastilles.
They smell like mint, but you don't know exactly, what are they made of, and you don't want to study this secret. You have enough your own ones.
So, you just clean your lips with the back of your hand, close your eyes and put a pastille into your mouth...

Wait... Oh no...

A shrill beeping pierces the night!
Once, again, then once again...

You desperately slam the fridge door trying to stop the "door is open" alarm.
How could you forget to do this a little earlier?!
But once the door gets closed, the darkness falls again. And in the darkness you trip over a stool under the table.

You hear a voice... Sweet as honey, but carving as a razor...
- Darling! How can you explain that you are returning to home at two o'clock in the morning?

You drop the plastic jug with remains of yogurt and swallow the mint gum.

A question is already made.

Edited September 22, 2017 by kerbiloid

[YNM]

"I'm making tea, dear. Mind you join ? Something keeps me up the night." *frantically finding the tea bags, put bits of pastilles for the mints, find actual milk*

 

 

Scenario :

Your car had just touched the car in front of yours. A young policeman came out.

[Confused Scientist]

I'm sorry, officer, but my car did not hit your car in the x, y, or z axis. Your car is just a few seconds back in time, so that it is also a few feet back on the street- hey, you don't need to take out those handcuffs!

 

Scenario: Oh,  now you've gone and done it, haven't you? You just had to go and knock that vase off of that pillar. Yes, that vase. The ancient Greek one. Well, if your bumbling hands got you into this, then maybe your fool mouth can get you out. Start talking!

[kerbiloid]

It's not me! It's (next poster)!

Edited September 30, 2017 by kerbiloid

[WinkAllKerb'']

grumpiness is rising, hide your cell phone prepare your army,  enjoy you bunker, no one know where anyone are

time to enjoy salt the saw ways for 85 years, you will be reminded and you will have time to remind

Edited October 6, 2017 by WinkAllKerb''