Stuff you'd say to 5 year younger you.

[Ultimate Steve]

Hmm. That's 2013, a month after I bought KSP. I would have been 11, in 5th grade... That doesn't sound right, but it appears so.

 

Dear younger me,

If you need any confirmation as to who I am... your earliest memories include a trip to the park in Ohio, looking through the Thomas catalog, building a red wagon, and coloring a picture of Annie and Clarabelle with your mom, although she did all of the work. Also up there is the time you swallowed that brown marble (still have the marble, kind of gross, kind of cool). You'll also recall that time that (NAME) basically asked to marry you around 2nd-3rd grade, and you never told anyone else. That's pretty much my confirmation, I believe you're smart enough to believe me.

First off, you have just bought a game called Kerbal Space Program. You will continue to love and cherish it for the next five years and beyond - but you must be patient. I realize you cannot currently run it at more than 2 frames per second, and you won't be able to play without lag for the next 2-3 years unless this letter borks the timelines. Don't let this deter you, it will all be worth it... just don't get too addicted.

Secondly, convince your parents to invest in bitcoin, and sell it all in mid December 2017 once it peaks. And don't let the money drive you crazy - be logical, donate most of it, and save some for your future trip to Mars. No, I'm not joking, there's a rocket system in development that could make it possible for you to not be a billionaire and still go. Spoilers, though.

Thirdly, make some friends. (NAME) and (NAME) are good ones. Once (NAME) moves to Tipton, you should try to be friends too. Don't get too upset because of the small stuff, that will really mess you up later on. Don't worry, and be happy.

Lastly, there's a good aerospace company that's just starting to get traction, it's called SpaceX. I encourage you to check them out. Start watching every launch livestream you can.

Do not read the next part of this letter until August 26, 2013. Trust me. I know curiosity is digging at you, but if you read this part too early, the timelines will diverge significantly and none of the information will still be useful. Godspeed,

-Steven

 

Welcome to 6th grade! you've now had a year of Trombone experience. Keep cracking at that, you might be able to visit some foreign countries if you can get good enough. I know the Band Teacher, (NAME) can be a bit frustrating at times (okay, all the time) but hang in there. At this time, you should expand yourself socially more. Start talking to more people, and stew in your emotions less. (NAME) is a very friendly person, although approaching the so-called "popular" group can be intimidating.

You'll also have (NAME) for science this year. It will be the most fun science class of Middle School. And as far as the balloon car races go, you may be tempted to use a model train bogey as a wheelbase. Don't. The low friction is appealing, but it will not be able to stay straight. Use posterboard and CD's instead.

6th grade is a pretty chill year. Enjoy it! Also, in the library, there will be a series called "The Edge Chronicles." Warning, it may take over your life, but it's really good. Create a KSP forum account. I know you may not want to, but don't wait until 2016 like I did... You have many wonderful things to share. Use the title "Ultimate Steve." Sorry, but NamegameEncrypted123 is just a weird name... Lastly, start fooling around on the piano more seriously. This will be a great way to expand your creativity. Oh, one last thing... I don't remember when this happened, but sometime in there you will be convinced to bring your blue camera on a Scout campout... don't. You will spill milk on it and it will never work again.

Ask your parents if you can try to see a rocket launch when you go to Florida for Christmas. And while you're there... ask your grandfather about his time at NASA and what he did with nuclear power. Spoilers... but he will sadly develop Alzheimer's at a later date. Ask him while you still can.

There's a band called "Wintergatan" that will release their first album this year. Follow them. They are pure magic, and their music will save you many times over.

Do not read the next part of this letter until August 26, 2014.

-Steven

P.S. Never delete the old versions of KSP from Dad's computer - the nostalgia will be worth its weight in gold someday.

 

So... You might have seen a real life rocket launch! Lucky you, that's more than I'd ever done at this point in my life! So, seventh grade! Also a pretty chill year from what I remember. Keep your grades up... If all went well, you're currently taking an 8th grade math class along with (NAME). Don't let them intimidate you, say hi, be polite, don't curl up into your shell.

Join Jazz Band. Yes, you have to get up early, but long term, it will be worth it. Don't worry about stuff a ton... Sorry for the short letter this time around, but take it as a sign that nothing major will go wrong.

Do not read the next part of this letter until January 8, 2015.

 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA Don't panic. Seriously - you're probably really confused, and have absolutely no idea what you're doing, but everyone needs to start somewhere, it's not every year you get your first crush!

Word of advice, however... Talk to her more. Be your usual funny self... Don't make it weird, and if she's turning away from you then just don't pursue it. Whatever you do, it will be better than what I did... can you believe it, I had a crush on her for three years and never did anything...

Good luck! Don't open the next part until August 26, 2015!

 

8th grade - the final frontier. Nah, just joking. But it is an important year. The timelines, unfortunately, have diverged very far on a small scale at this point, so none of this stuff may be relevant... Or maybe all of it will be. Don't stress about social interactions much - it's just talking. Relationship-wise, if you're ready for something (I wasn't at the time), you aren't in a relationship with (NAME), and assuming you joined Quiz Bowl, there's a girl named (NAME) that you might have a chance with... But if it's not lining up due to divergence, don't try.

Being bused to the high school every other day to take Geometry may seem daunting. It will be fine, don't make a big deal of it, and explore the huge old place during your downtime. Make an alliance with (NAME), he's not as weird as he looks. And please, if (NAME) bugs you like he did me, first stop laughing at his pranks, tell him that they aren't funny, and if that doesn't work, semi-forcefully tell him to stop. He'll stop being that way after a while, and he will prove to be a cool friend and the best tech guy down the road.

ENJOY this year. It's a fun one, from what I remember! And if you get a certain idea during the last howevermany days of school... Do it. Call it Operation Final Countdown. It will make you a boss... and if you haven't been heeding my advice, it will really help you come out of your shell and be one of the defining moments of your Middle School life.

Take a water bottle filled about 1/4 full and try to throw it in the air so it lands on its base. Take a video of this and post it on YouTube.

Do not read the next part until August 1, 2016.

-Steven

 

Hold your horses, it's High School time! WOOOHOOO! It's going to seem insanely hard and crazy and chaotic, but let it all go. Enjoy yourself as much as you possibly can. The after school stuff will get crazy time consuming but do it and do it all. Sign up for ESPECIALLY Academic Decathlon (you will meet many fellow nerd friends) and Speech, in specific, Improv. Don't waste your time with Spontaneous Speaking, or even FTC. (NAME) will pressure you to join, but in reality you will just sit there as he does everything and not let anyone else do anything... Don't let that make you hate him, though.

Band camp will be sweltering hot - so, go to Theisens and buy yourself several dozen feet of small piping, a pump, and batteries. Make a suit that has an ice water reservoir and pumps the ice water through the tubes all around your body. You'll look weird, but there will probably be people willing to buy it from you for $50. No promises, though. Marching band is really fun. Don't let (NAME) be too much of an annoyance... As you will discover Sophomore year, though, he is dangerously good at dodgeball. Painfully dangerous. Honestly, just hide in the gym closet if it gets bad, or beneath the bleachers. Your gym teacher won't care.

Try out for the fall musical. You'll do well. Also, caution (NAME) not to get her thumb crushed by the several hundred pound set.

MAKE ABSOLUTE SURE you are signed up for STEM independent study. It will be the best class of your life and be cancelled due to the nature of the class, enjoy it this year while it lasts.

Remember all of those cringey songs you've been writing? Well, since you've been playing piano... I want you to start work on an album. No joke. Edit the videos together with ShotCut and buy yourself a decent microphone. And transpose When I Close My Eyes down to the key of Bb so you can actually sing it.

When you go to the Spring play, you will be asked to sit by two of your current crushes, (NAME) and (NAME). Sit by (NAME) and NOT 5 seats away. Talk some afterward... Unless the timelines have diverged a lot, you may find that she likes you a bit. Over the summer you will practice together in AcDec and generally have a fun time. Get close. Join Istep, golf, and GET A JOB SOMEWHERE.

Also, YAAAAAAYYYY SPACEX LANDED A BOOSTER!!! This has big implications.

But something bad is probably going to happen on September 1. It will be tough, but you'll survive. Not life changing, but just tough. Don't dread the date, though. Something will happen at IAC 2016 that will make up for it. Unfortunately you will be at the dentists for the livestream, watch it ASAP.

If you haven't already, start writing down something good that happened every single day, and start placing objects associated with memories in a shoebox. It will pay off. At Church camp you will meet a girl named (NAME) and her friends. Just in general be friendly and talkative.

Make a bet on/r/HighStakesSpaceX that Falcon Heavy will launch on February 6, 2018.

Remember to watch the Eclipse! It is well worth it!

Do not read the next section of this letter until July 24, 2017, at 2:00 PM.

-Steven

 

This is the most important thing you will read. If you listen to anything, listen to this. If the timeline hasn't diverged as much as I'd hoped, you will soon find yourself at a rest area in Pennsylvania between now and 4:30. Order what you usually would and MORE. And insist on staying at the rest area until you have finished every last French Fry. Every single one. Eat slowly. No matter how gross they get. Delay your departure as long as possible. If the song "Staying Alive" plays over the radio, wait until the end, and then the end of the song after that. And drive slowly on the highway for good measure.

You may be asking why. You don't want to know.

Do not open the next part of this letter until August 1, 2017.

-Steven

 

Welcome to Sophomore year. Having avoided a major catastrophe, your life will have diverged dramatically from what happened to me. This is good, but little of the specifics will be relevant... If I had sent one letter back to this date, the instructions would be very different.

Assuming you are still on good terms with (NAME), ask her to Homecoming. If (NAME) asks you first, politely decline with the excuse that you don't know her last name (and don't look it up, otherwise it will be a lie!). Afterwards, just do what feels right... If you end up in a relationship, that's great! Amazing, even! DO NOT let it fizzle out. Actually go on dates, smile, get small gifts often, watch movies, and communicate openly.

Like last year, continue in AcDec and Speech, and in music writing and stories. Try out for the musical will be a great experience. The fall play... Do tech. It will be amazingly funny, watching from the back monitor. The cast will be golden!

And when you inevitably strap rocket engines to a toilet seat, do so using a brand new package of 3 "E" engines. One C will not be enough by a long shot.

Remember to sell your Bitcoin. It should peak at around 19 thousand dollars. Keep a close eye on it. Don't let the wealth consume you.

Don't sweat the chair placements for Europe.

Do not open the next part of the letter until the afternoon of April 22, 2018.

-Steven

 

I'm sorry. If I had told you about Christmas Eve you would be dreading that day for a long time... Unless divergence caused it to shift in time (probably up to a week). Nonetheless, it's sad... But remember. Twenty years ago the doctors gave your Grandfather 2 years to live. And he just kept living!

And if the divergence didn't happen, or for some reason the time travel didn't work and you're just now getting the letter... sorry about what happened this morning and yesterday. If your relationship survived Prom, good for you! Amazing! But, sadly, I wasn't as blessed. And it's okay to be sad, but don't let it consume you. Bounce back, listen to Starmachine2000, make an effort to be friends afterwards, and go back to your shoebox of memories. Look at each and every one. And then get that old shelf out from the basement. Clear a spot on your desk for it, and clean off the wall behind it. Put your memories there, they are to precious to be hidden away in a shoebox.

Phew, so much gloom... On to the positive side, there's a chance none of that happened to you at all! If that's true, then this worked. I'm so happy for your possibilities, what can be... Volunteer to tune the piano at the Oasis. It will be a learning experience.

And lastly, brighten up! They invent time travel in a bit, otherwise I wouldn't be able to send this letter!

Do not open the next part of this letter until 10:00PM on May 20, 2018.

-Steven

 

Dear 8 hour younger me, start writing your follow up letter now, and send it to five years ago to improve your life more... Who knows, maybe we'll eventually be able to make the world an amazing place this way, building on our own achievements each cycle... And most importantly, I know you want to get some sleep and watch the Antares launch at 3:30, but if you go to sleep you'll find this forum thread, complete with time travel, and you'll be writing this letter until 6 AM! It's currently 6:01, the last week of school starts in 2 hours and I've barely slept!

But most importantly, going forward, don't be afraid of the unknown, and don't hate yourself for all of your small mistakes. Don't be afraid to fail. Don't be a jerk. Learn. Apply to colleges. And someday soon, you'll be in space before you know it!

-Yourself

 

[Gargamel]

1 hour ago, kerbiloid said:

22 years ago I would silently give me a notebook with preinstalled soft and a city map with future nice job places. 

Forget Jobs, a list of things to invest in....

[Kerbal Fried Chicken]

quick buy KSP before the deadline. and on a less important note go to a doctor - you have a tumor you wont find til 2017

edit: @Gargamel there are some sports bets i'd lay down as well :-)

Edited May 22, 2018 by Kerbal Fried Chicken

[kerbiloid]

Somebody should take a trip to 7 years ago and suggest HarvesteR to make a desktop rocket simulator. Just in case.

Edited May 23, 2018 by kerbiloid

[Gargamel]

35 minutes ago, kerbiloid said:

Somebody should take a trip to 7 years ago and suggest Harvester to make a desktop rocket simulator. Just for case.

LOL.  nice  (and the phrase is Just in case ;))

[FireKerb]

On 5/21/2018 at 9:03 PM, Ultimate Steve said:

[Snippity snip]

 

That would be an interesting idea for a story.

A kid receives a letter claiming that its from the future. At the beginning they protect it like a baby, and treat it like a bible, believing everything within it. As they age, they lose trust in the letter and listen to it less. However, they encounter a terrible fate that was predicted by the letter and could have been predicted. Finally, when they come to the same point in time the letter was from, they send their own letter back, hoping their next timeline's self listens to the advice closer.

[Fraston]

Oh yeah, the edge chronicles...

read quite a few of those..