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Calling occupants of interplanetary craft ( Or just Ubuntu Users)


NewtSoup

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6 hours ago, PB666 said:

I've never met a fake person before, I've know a few that were 'fakes'. The bot proclamation is overused form of paranoia on the internet. Also she's not a fake, she has numerous typo errors just like the rest of us corporeal beings.

The true mastery in programming a bot is the occasional typo.  Grand masters make sure the typos are the sort humans will make (next key over, transpositions, right/left hand switches, letter omissions like the one I just corrected, "fat finger" double keys) rather than just random errors.

Edited by Zeiss Ikon
typo
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kik.. I mean lol.

This is the pinnacle of Bot Programming.  Its from the Star Wars Galaxies Days.  Written by Fargo Crestinglight.

The Autocamp 2000 talks to other players with following rules:

1.) If someone says something ending in a question mark, respond by saying "Dude?"

2.) If someone says something ending in an exclamation point, respond by saying "Dude!"

3.) If someone says something ending with a period, respond by randomly saying one of three things: "Okie," "Sure," or "Right on."

4.) EXCEPTION: If someone says something directly to you by mentioning your name, respond by saying "Lag."

5.) (And remember to accept all trade requests from other players by giving them a melon.)

I sat it in front of the keyboard, made sure my character had at least fifty melons in his backpack, and then trudged off to leave it alone for the night.

My character, Farglik the Mon Calamari, waited around in the Cantina for some adventurers. The following is a log of what transpired:




KillSwitch: [Shouting] Does anyone want to join our hunting party?

Farglik: [Powered by the Autocamp 2000] Dude?

[KillSwitch invites Farglik to join the group.]
[Farglik joins the group]

KillSwitch: We're gonna go hunt wrixes.

Farglik: Right on.

[The group of players runs out of the Cantina, Farglik following close behind. Farglik shoots at every little monster they pass.]

KillSwitch: Why are you attacking the durneys?

Farglik: Dude?

KillSwitch: The durneys, the little bunny things -- why do you keep shooting at them?

Farglik: Dude?

Troobacca: [A wookie in the party] My weapon powerup expired, I need a new one.

Farglik: Sure.

[Troobacca opens a trade with Farglik.]
[Farglik hands him a melon.]

Troobacca: ...what's this?

Farglik: Dude?

Troobacca: You handed me a melon!

Farglik: Dude!

KillSwitch: Knock it off guys, I see some wrixes up ahead. Let's do this.

Farglik: Right on.

[The group encounters a bunch of dangerous wrixes, but they gang up and shoot every one of them.]

KillSwitch: We rock!

Farglik: Dude!

Troobacca: We so OWNED them!

Farglik: Dude!

KillSwitch: Uh oh, hang on. Up ahead are some Sharnaff bulls. We can't handle them, so don't shoot.

Farglik: Okie. 

[Farglik shoots one of the Sharnaff bulls.]
[The bull attacks; Trobacca and several other party members are killed before they beat it.]

KillSwitch: You IDIOT! Farglik why did you shoot at them?

Farglik: Lag.

KillSwitch: Well don't do it again.

Farglik: Sure.

[Farglik shoots at another Sharnaff bull.]
[The entire party is slaughtered except for Farglik.] 

[ ... Farglik stands there, alone, for several hours ... ]

[ ... finally, a merchant runs up to him.]

Stingrie: [A Rodian merchant.] Hey man! Would you like to buy a stimpack?

Farglik: Dude?

Stingrie: A stimpack. It boosts your health by 200 points. I'll sell it to you for 500 credits.

Farglik: Okie.

[Stingrie opens a trade session.]
[Farglik hands him a melon.]

Stingrie: What the hell is this?

Farglik: Dude?

Stingrie: You handed me a melon.

Farglik: Right on.

Stingrie: I told you 500 credits!

Farglik: Dude!

Stingrie: If it's too expensive, just say so.

Farglik: Sure.

[Stingrie runs away, angry.]

[ ... several more hours pass ...]

[A small hunting party led by Krushmor the Master Rifleman comes over the ridge and spots Farglik.]

Krushmor: Farglik, what's up? What are you doing way out here?

Farglik: Lag.

Krushmor: We're rooting dralls out of a cave. You should join our group.

Farglik: Okie. 

[Krushmor invites Farglik to join the group.]
[Farglik joins the group and starts following Krushmor around.]

Soop: [The party's medic]. Here, Farglik, let me hand you some stimpacks.

Farglik: Lag.

Soop: I know, it's pretty bad tonight. Here you go.

Farglik: Right on.

[Soop opens up a trade window and hands Farglik a Stimpack.]
[Farglik hands Soop a melon.]

Soop: Uh ... thanks!

Farglik: Dude!

[The party enters a cave and spends the next two hours brutally clearing it of creatures, room by room. Everyone gets tons of XP.]

Krushmor: Aw man, it's getting really late guys. I should go!

Farglik: Dude!

Krushmor: I know, sucks. I'll catch you all later.

Farglik: Sure.

[Krushmor logs off. By default, Farglik is now promoted to group leader!]

Soop: Well that sucks. What should we hunt next?

Farglik: Dude?

Soop: Let's hunt Slice Hounds!

Farglik: Dude!

Soop: I know an awesome spot. Follow me.

Farglik: Right on.

[The group runs out of the cave, but Farglik, because he is now group leader, just stands there. Several minutes pass before Soop returns.]

Soop: Farglik why didn't you come with us?

Farglik: Lag.

Soop: Well catch up when you can.

Farglik: Okie.

[Farglik stands motionless in the cave and eventually the group disbands. Half an hour passes.] 

[Suddenly, one of the game developers, controlling Darth Vader, enters the cave.]

Darth Vader: Well, my young padawan, we've been watching your progress for quite some time.

Farglik: Sure.

Darth Vader: You have done well. We have decided to bestow upon you: Force powers!

Farglik: Okie.

Darth Vader: You will be the most powerful Jedi on the planet!

Farglik: Dude!

[Darth Vader gives Farglik force powers.]

Darth Vader: Would you like my light saber?

Farglik: Dude?

Darth Vader: My light saber. I bestow it onto you.

Farglik: Right on!

[Darth Vader opens up a trade and gives Farglik a light saber.]
[Farglik hands Darth Vader a melon.]

Darth Vader: Thanks, uh, for the ... melon.

Farglik: Sure.

Darth Vader: Well? Aren't you going to try out your new Force powers?

Farglik: Dude?

Darth Vader: Your Force powers! The powers I just gave you!

Farglik: Dude!

Darth Vader: The FORCE, Farglik! Use the Force!

Farglik: Lag.

Darth Vader: Okay, you know what. Just forget the Force powers. I'm taking them back.

Farglik: Okie.

Darth Vader: And give me back my light saber!

Farglik: Sure.

[Farglik hands Darth Vader a melon.]

[Darth Vader kills Farglik.]

[Farglik respawns in the cloning facility.]

KillSwitch: [In the cloning facility] Whoa! Look who just popped in. What happened to you, Farglik?

Farglik: Lag.

KillSwitch: Want to come hunting with us?

Farglik: Okie.

[Farglik and the Autocamp 2000 join the hunt and gain experience for several more hours...]


I'd call the experiment an unqualified success.

- Fargo

Edited by NewtSoup
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5 hours ago, Zeiss Ikon said:

The true mastery in programming a bot is the occasional typo.  Grand masters make sure the typos are the sort humans will make (next key over, transpositions, right/left hand switches, letter omissions like the one I just corrected, "fat finger" double keys) rather than just random errors.

Well, at least ill say your paranoia is well thought out. 

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just figured out how to pxe boot linux mint. managed to get it installed in my lab computer next to windows. i was already using the practice of sticking a grub partition at the top of my drive so it was easy to play with other oses. was also trying to install reactos 0.4.7 with less successful results (it just doesnt seem to work on newer computers, doesnt work on my old i7 rig or my older core2 rig). 

Edited by Nuke
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7 hours ago, NewtSoup said:

Are you actually calling me a bot?

Of course not.  The technology I mentioned doesn't exist yet.  It would require a computer/software system to pass the hard Turing test.  That hasn't yet been demonstrated.  That we know of.

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4 hours ago, PB666 said:

Well can the Royal Society really be fair judge of what a 13 yo ukranian boy says. I bet they can't even figure out what their own 13 yo sons are saying. 

That's probably their plan.  13 year olds can be barely understood by anyone even their own parents so it makes it easier to "pass".

I used to know a guy who reckoned he could write a program in PHP that would pass the turing test in 2 days.  I laughed.

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On 9. 4. 2018 at 12:36 AM, NewtSoup said:

I used to know a guy who reckoned he could write a program in PHP that would pass the turing test in 2 days.  I laughed.

That explains a lot about stuff on internet tubes nowadays.

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