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What crimes against Kerbin have you committed?


crasher925

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I use Kerbal Animation Suite to make a kerbal dab
Ive been exiled from the KSC and ive been living off of nothing but grass and Mystery Goo (still dont know what its made of, not even sure if its safe to eat)
My Reputation on Kerbin has been ruined and im stuck as a homeless man.
dont do what i did, SAVE YOURSELF

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  • 2 weeks later...

I murdered Danlong Kerman.

I lured her to the launch pad and then activated a USAF Airborne Laser, which targeted and killed her; she was disintegrated instantly. I then sabotaged the laser to make it look like an automated security feature gone bad.

THEY'LL NEVER KNOW. HA HA HA!

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i wanted to deorbit my station, but i needed to undo the supports so hopefully it would fall apart(it didnt) and i didnt have any extra kerbals to spare, and im lazy, so i cheated one into existance, cheated him to the station.

as it was deorbiting i had him hold onto a ladder and i told him, if you survive to the surface you can live.

the cool part is that for the longest time while the ship was burning up i could see a faint red star moving across the sky away from me.......it was him. sorry for hte bad video quality.

(i was going to add in the arms of an angel, but video editing upsets me)

 

Edited by putnamto
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  • 1 month later...

I kno this is an old thread AND this post is a repost, but this was @Lisias's idea, so don't blame me. (Orignally posted here)

I, uh, sacrificed Valentina for cash.

 

So, I have a fairly new modded career game with Kerbalism installed. First time playing in a WHILE, by the way.

 

Oh... and I have quicksaves and reverts disabled.

I have two contracts active, one to stay in orbit for 30 days and one to escape Kerbin (to be more specific, flyby Sonnah, since I'm playing with New Horizons, which, yes, still works with LinuxGuruGamer's changes in 1.6.1).

I THINK this thing has enough Oxygen to last 30 days... I did basically a ground test of it and it said I had plenty of Oxygen, despite the VAB planner thing saying I had 4 days.  For some reason, the idea that it might be considering Kerbin's atmosphere never seemed to cross my mind... and I launched the mission.

 

I timewarped about 4 days until I was so rudely interrupted by a low oxygen warning. Now, of course... I COULD deorbit, but... uh... you see... I kinda spent too much developing this launcher. I mean, you can't just install all these mods and *not* try all the parts! I didn't add up the delta V stuff either, so the first couple of tries didn't actually make orbit... sure, could've stuck with the first design I used to reach orbit, but why not make it better?

 

So... if I had Val land safely, it was all over for the space program. I couldn't complete any contracts, I couldn't even do much science... however, there was ONE bonus to my bad planning... I had *some* extra dV.

So, I just... uh... kinda hit Z. Val became the first Kerbal to escape Kerbin's SOI, satisfying the other contract and saving the program... and sealing her fate.

Without tracking station upgrades, I couldn't tell how long to burn, and I actually burn way more than I needed too... maybe if I knew I could have fuel left and head back. Oh well. Too late now...

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  • 6 months later...

Oh dear, welp lets list them off before Kinterpol shows up again.

I am responsible for 2... maybe 84 counts of genocide in Kermenia. I was involved in the ethnic cleansing of Kosnians in Kerbia after the fall of Kugoslavia, which I also profited heavily from that as I sold arms to both sides of the war. I sold enriched Keranium to North Kerbeans as well as he payload vehicles for nuclear warheads.

But way before that I was involved in Kazi Regime's KK advanced projection division and managed the funding for the Kehrmacht's K2 rocket bombs. After the war when was I supposed to be put on trial in Kuremberg for some certain activities I undertook in the KK specifically involving the unholy biomechanical synthesis of Kerbal and rocket with the help of a certain Doctor Kengele but the Katican gave me protection and helped me escape to South Kermerica with the false identity and some really lovely pamphlets regarding the Katholic religion. Eventually I got bored of being farmer there and defected to the Koviet Union where I assisted keneralissimo Kosef Kalin in his internal purges of his underlings who insulted his mustache. Few decades later it collapsed and I was out of a job but I was able to get a small part time thing with this really weird dude named Kaddam Kussein and the less I talk about that the better.  Aaaaand I think I still have an unpaid Parking ticket in Kibya. Oh and I was the inventor of the method of making hotdog buns and hotdogs come in two separate amounts.

2 years later and I'm running Kerbin's most uh... somewhat successful space program.

Edited by Krulliam
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I've got another one - I made a plane with a cockpit that can eject and glide to its own runway and not just parachute down like most other ejectors. So, I eject the cockpit at the right time and turn the plane body into a missile that hits the VAB and kills whatever Kerbals were inside.

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35 minutes ago, Bej Kerman said:

I've got another one - I made a plane with a cockpit that can eject and glide to its own runway and not just parachute down like most other ejectors. So, I eject the cockpit at the right time and turn the plane body into a missile that hits the VAB and kills whatever Kerbals were inside.

You can't be sure if there was anybody inside that building don't feel guilty too much. Maybe they instinctively knew that any Kerbal flight next to the VAB is a bad omen, and hide.

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46 minutes ago, kerbiloid said:

You can't be sure if there was anybody inside that building don't feel guilty too much. Maybe they instinctively knew that any Kerbal flight next to the VAB is a bad omen, and hide.

Not like it was by accident.

34 minutes ago, Lo Var Lachland said:

I have done things I cannot un-do. I have seen things I cannot un-see. 

F9 is your saviour

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1 hour ago, Bej Kerman said:

Not like it was by accident.

Doesn't matter. If I was a Kerbal, there would be no me in a mile physics radius from the VAB on just knowing another Kerbal is coming to the launchpad.

Edited by kerbiloid
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On 10/29/2019 at 8:27 PM, Krulliam said:

Oh dear, welp lets list them off before Kinterpol shows up again.

I am responsible for 2... maybe 84 counts of genocide in Kermenia. I was involved in the ethnic cleansing of Kosnians in Kerbia after the fall of Kugoslavia, which I also profited heavily from that as I sold arms to both sides of the war. I sold enriched Keranium to North Kerbeans as well as he payload vehicles for nuclear warheads.

But way before that I was involved in Kazi Regime's KK advanced projection division and managed the funding for the Kehrmacht's K2 rocket bombs. After the war when was I supposed to be put on trial in Kuremberg for some certain activities I undertook in the KK specifically involving the unholy biomechanical synthesis of Kerbal and rocket with the help of a certain Doctor Kengele but the Katican gave me protection and helped me escape to South Kermerica with the false identity and some really lovely pamphlets regarding the Katholic religion. Eventually I got bored of being farmer there and defected to the Koviet Union where I assisted keneralissimo Kosef Kalin in his internal purges of his underlings who insulted his mustache. Few decades later it collapsed and I was out of a job but I was able to get a small part time thing with this really weird dude named Kaddam Kussein and the less I talk about that the better.  Aaaaand I think I still have an unpaid Parking ticket in Kibya. Oh and I was the inventor of the method of making hotdog buns and hotdogs come in two separate amounts.

2 years later and I'm running Kerbin's most uh... somewhat successful space program.

Generic “I am wanted for war crimes in [country]” meme.

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