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What do I do with my depression?


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I failed at my religion exam, and now I have a makeup exam.
I live in a country where 99% of the people are religious, while me myself, I m not religious at all, and if I fail at this damned exam I ll redo my class again just because I'm not religious?
Now I have depression and anxiety.
If I do fail, I am committing suicide, that is it, I hate this life.

 

Update: I've just done my makeup exam, 8/28

If I do not update you within 15 days, know that I'm no more.

Edited by Waseemq1235
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2 hours ago, Waseemq1235 said:

I failed at my religion exam, and now I have a makeup exam.
I live in a country where 99% of the people are religious, while me myself, I m not religious at all, and if I fail at this damned exam I ll redo my class again just because I'm not religious?
Now I have depression and anxiety.
If I do fail, I am committing suicide, that is it, I hate this life.

Don't. As someone not religious you well understand that this is the only life you have, or will ever have. It's literally everything. Don't waste it. You're smart enough to game the system. Learn it just to be able to argue against it at some point when you can escape. You can always talk to people outside (like us). PM me any time.

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Taking this test won't keep you from expressing your views forever. While it may seem dark and repressive, you will be able to move forward and keep your beliefs. Everybody has to do things they don't like or want, at some point or another. If you can beat this test, you'll be done with it and can move on. Eventually you'll be able to break free, find other people like yourself, and even move away to a more secular country if you want. I'm sure you can do it. In the meantime, you can find friends here, who come from all around the world and are happy to chat. We are rooting for you!

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There is nothing going on in your life, no matter how bad it *may* seem at the moment, that makes suicide an attractive option.  Stick around; it gets better.

Best,
-Slashy

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Think of them as history, law and moral lessons. All beliefs share most of their core moral values - only the execution differs.

Being religious myself (though definitely not too much) and living in fairly (fairly ! not entirely) religious society with highly diverse beliefs (yeah, bizzare, I know), we can always tolerate each other.

I'd be interested in what place you're in though.

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Oh, man.. please, don't say that.

If you need help... go talk to someone!

I do know how you feel... I battle depression all the time. I'm on disability with a broken back... and it's not fixable. Well, it is, but 3 different doctors recommended against surgery, because there's big chance it would do more harm then good. And there are a lot of things I can't do anymore... things others people might take for granted, like going grocery shopping, or out to a restaurant or theater. Do you know I haven't been to a restaurant in over 10 years??? I can't handle the waiting, and then the seating. It hurts too much.

So yeah... depression was a huge problem for the first few years after I snapped my back... and it still rears it's ugly head now and then. But as cliche' as it might sound, I found KSP, and it helped a lot. Especially writing Emiko... and a couple other things I'm doing on the side... It gives me something to do, and let's me feel useful again. And I have all of the forum that I consider my friends... and @SQUAD, too... I know there are people on here that will let me rant and bend their ear backwards if I start spiraling downward...and I am so grateful!

Anyway... please... go talk to someone... there's always a way to beat the depression monster. You just need to find something to get your mind off of the bad stuff.

 

Edited by Just Jim
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I was refraining me to post here, in fear of making things worse. But now I felt the need to intervene.

EVERYBODY here is right on what they are talking, but I think this could be said slightly better. :) 

First at all, "Depression" is not a "problem" you have, "Depression" is a self-preservation measure your mind took when it thinks you are going through the tubes. It's like fear - it's something you must accept and embrace, not to fight against.

Sometimes, and exactly as fear, these things ends up doing exactly the opposite what it should, as we currently live in a World very different from the World that created us as species. *THIS* is the problem.

So, first and most important of all: YOU ARE NOT THE PROBLEM. You have some problems around you, and these problems are triggering some self-preservartion measures that it happens to do not work properly at the present situation.

Again, it's like fear: if you feel that irresistible urge to run when you see a tiger, your fear are saving your life. If that urge happens when you see a cockroach, not that much. :P 

My bit of advice: stop seeing the depression as a problem. This is probably the reason for your anxiety. And anxiety when blended to depression can be a very nasty thing.

By all means, seek professional help. If you were catholic, I would advise you to talk with your priest too. Seriously, religion is not bad by itself: there's a reason we relied on religion on the pre-science era.

In a way or another, there're people around you that solve this kind of problem for living. Don't be afraid of looking for them the same way you look for a doctor when you get a flu that doesn't goes away.

Edited by Lisias
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2 hours ago, Lisias said:

I was refraining me to post here, in fear of making things worse. But now I felt the need to intervene.

This is apparently not something we should be worried about. The general advice is that you cant really "give people ideas", you dont encourage self-harm just by talking about it, suicide and suicidal thoughts should not be verbotten subjects. One of the best things we can offer is just our ears.

I would encourage anybody, depressed or not, to have a google around the subject, there are quite a few resources for people who know someone in trouble or for people who are themselves suffering.

It so sucks to be alone, or to feel alone, I think being lonely-of-mind, as Waseem describes, is worse than physical loneliness.

I hope that by reading this thread, it helps to show that there are like minded people in many places, even though we might not be close on a map.

 

 

 

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Some posts have been removed from this thread. We do not actually know which religion OP is talking about, and it doesn't matter anyway. Those are not matters we can settle here on our friendly little space game forum, so let's leave those discussions for other parts of the internet, please. 

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Suicide is not a option, especially not for people of a young age.

What saddens me the most are people committing suicide at a young age, because of reasons like bullying, failing certain exams, etc. I was bullied in elementary school, and i still am being bullied to this day, but why do i not take my own life? Well, because all of its going to be irrelevant in the future. There are many people in history who had the worst time in their early life but grew up to be extremely succesfull later on. Like this guy:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andrew_Carnegie

Now im not saying that you will become extremely rich and succesfull, but i do think you can live a decent life, even after hard times. Living happily ever after isn't impossible at all, even after depression.

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There are always possibilities. Depression has a way of making them seem unattainable, but there are always people somewhere who can help you find them-- whether professionals, friends, family, or just people on the internet who share a common interest and are always ready to listen to your problems and sympathize.

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If talking with someone locally is possible, then I agree, that’s the best place to start.

Nonetheless, I hope it’s clear that he has a community here that cares, and lacking any better resource locally, he can feel free to talk it out here, among friends who have his best interests in mind.

Also, anxiety and depression are illnesses that are in fact quite treatable. If you have a broken limb, you get it fixed. Pneumonia, you do the same. Biochemical problems are just as real and medical.

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17 hours ago, NSEP said:

Well, because all of its going to be irrelevant in the future.

What's relevant is the outcome, not the events.

But you'll realize that every event is an outcome of the previous one.

 

So to OP, I advise you to make concrete acts. Do not run off - if you do run, ensure that's a concrete action and not some transient choice.

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  • 3 weeks later...
24 minutes ago, Earthlinger said:

So.....the OP hasn't been active since June 29

.....Worrisome...?

Yes, it is. I PMed him a few times since this thread was started, but that's the last I saw him read anything.

 

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According to his history, long breaks without comment are not unusual, and personally if I had made such a call for help, I might be reluctant to immediately return, or I might have other things on my plate for that matter. 

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5 hours ago, p1t1o said:

According to his history, long breaks without comment are not unusual, and personally if I had made such a call for help, I might be reluctant to immediately return, or I might have other things on my plate for that matter. 

Yeah, that is my hope.

 

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