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Spacescifi

Write a Yelp Review For a Klingon Mcdonalds

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Personally I find reading Mcdonalds Yelp reviews entertaining. For fun, I want you to write a fictional yelp review for a mcdonalds run by Klingons.

 

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Use some real yelp reviews for inspiration:

 I come here coz it's close to home and since I dislike cooking, this is my go to. Mind you, there is a myriad of fast foods in the same area, but if I want a burger I come here because they say that the meat is cooked to order. But sometimes that's not always true. You can tell it's not freshly cooked if after you pay at window 1, and pick up your order within 2 minutes at window 2. And do you want fresh french fries from mc d's? Order them with no salt. You can always ask for salt on the side if you really need it.

 

 

Just add some uniquely Klingon scenarios to make the yelp review actually stick. Have fun and humor!

 

 

 

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"Staff is incredibly hostile. Food was still squirming when delivered. 0/10" 

 

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On 9/11/2019 at 2:55 AM, kerbiloid said:

Klingon prefer KlingonFC.

Klingon Football Club?

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Revenge is a dish best served cold. The same is not true of Ch’ken N’guts. 0/10, chef has no honour.

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I waited for 20 minures to get my food, snd when I got it, it was cold. So I complained to Manager Gowron that his cook is awful, and I would not serve this food to my dog and wanted a refund.

Gowron just glared at me with his big bug eyes and said, "Enough! I will settle this!" Gowron went to the back and said louldly, "That human over there makes the claim that you are a horrible cook and that not even a Tarq could eat your food. What do you say to that?"

The klingon cook said I dishonored him and his house, and jumped over the counter and whipped out a knife, meanwhile Gowron returned and offered me a knife.

"What?! I just want a refund!"

Gowron stared at me again witth his bug eyes. "Will you engage in honorable combat? Or not? If not, you may leave."

"What about my refund?"

"Defeat the cook in honorable combat and you may take that and all that belongs to him, including his wife and children. Do you accept this challenge?"

I walked out. So be warned if you come here, only ask for refunds if Worf is manager during the day. Do not go at night. Or else you may have to deal with Manager Gowron and his crazy but awful night cook.

I give them 2 stars, inasmuch they gave me an entertaining story to tell and worf is good... when he is on shift.

Edited by Spacescifi

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2 hours ago, Spacescifi said:

I waited for 20 minures to get my food, snd when I got it, it was cold. So I complained to Manager Gowron that his cook is awful, and I would not serve this food to my dog and wanted a refund.

Gowron just glared at me with his big bug eyes and said, "Enough! I will settle this!" Gowron went to the back and said louldly, "That human over there makes the claim that you are a horrible cook and that not even a Tarq could eat your food. What do you say to that?"

The klingon cook said I dishonored him and his house, and jumped over the counter and whipped out a knife, meanwhile Gowron returned and offered me a knife.

"What?! I just want a refund!"

Gowron stared at me again witth his bug eyes. "Will you engage in honorable combat? Or not? If not, you may leave."

"What about my refund?"

"Defeat the cook in honorable combat and you may take that and all that belongs to him, including his wife and children. Do you accept this challenge?"

I walked out. So be warned if you come here, only ask for refunds if Worf is manager during the day. Do not go at night. Or else you may have to deal with Manager Gowron and his crazy but awful night cook.

I give them 2 stars, inasmuch they gave me an entertaining story to tell and worf is good... when he is on shift.

Yeah, I kinda figured to write a bad Yelp review of a Klingon establishment would be to risk challenging the honour of all the employees there. Not recommended unless you’re tired of living. @Vanamondeand @KSK, better keep your phasers fully charged, and don’t leave home without them!

”I couldn’t eat another bite after the first one, but since I enjoy living, I’ll give it a 10/10...”

Edit: Oh, and shouldn’t this be in forum games?

Edited by StrandedonEarth

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I was wearing my favourite red shirt when someone shot me in the stomach and ruined it. Food was garbage and I couldn't understand the waiters. 0/10.

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