Mars-Bound Hokie Posted December 19, 2019 Author Share Posted December 19, 2019 Steve Kerman got run over by a reindeer. Jerry Kerman - drowning. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Arcitect Posted December 20, 2019 Share Posted December 20, 2019 When going into Laythe's ocean, Jerry Kerman forgot to fix his helmet. He went -200m. John Kerman - Pressure Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KerbolExplorer Posted December 29, 2019 Share Posted December 29, 2019 John kerman got squished by air ehh kerman - words Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stamp20 Posted December 29, 2019 Share Posted December 29, 2019 45 minutes ago, KerbolExplorer said: John kerman got squished by air ehh kerman - words A bored engineer made a giant statue of the bee movie script with I-beams, and it fell over and crushed ehh Kerman. Billy-Bobwise Kerman - Starving Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rover 6428 Posted January 9, 2020 Share Posted January 9, 2020 Billy-Bobwise Kerman was a popular politician on Kerbin, and he was very famous for his campaign to send a kerballed mission to Jool. During this campaign, he was invited to make a speech at the South Kerbin's Institute of Discovery. So, he prepared a speech and took off in his own Kessna Mk 3 the next day. However, during his flight, two of the three engines of the plane failed, and Billy-Bobwise's plane had to ditch in the ocean. Unfortunatley for Billy-Bobwise, the impact with the water created a giant hole at the bottom of his Kessna, and the plane started taking on water as soon as it landed. Billy-Bobwise had nothing left to do, but to take an emergency raft that was in the plane and hope that a rescue team arrives before his emergency snacks run out. But they never came... Fidelford McKerman - emergency quarantine enforcement platform Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperMiiBrother Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 Fidelford McKerman was one of the first kerbals to explode the interstellar areas, and also the first interstellar rescue. His mission brought him to Planet 5657A, to rescue Ryley Kerman. During the descent into the atmosphere, a laser fired at his ship. He didn't have enough time (or fuel) to evade. He exploded and according to the recently rescued Ryley Kerman, It was epic. Idiot Kerman: fell 1 centimeter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirkidirk Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 (edited) 13 hours ago, SuperMiiBrother said: Fidelford McKerman was one of the first kerbals to explode the interstellar areas, and also the first interstellar rescue. His mission brought him to Planet 5657A, to rescue Ryley Kerman. During the descent into the atmosphere, a laser fired at his ship. He didn't have enough time (or fuel) to evade. He exploded and according to the recently rescued Ryley Kerman, It was epic. Idiot Kerman: fell 1 centimeter. Idiot kerman was walking down the road when until he almost stepped on a mine, his foot stopping one centimeter above the mine. he then realized that his other foot was on a banana peel, and he purposely slipped. widlock kerman - died due to her badS name. Edited January 12, 2020 by Dirkidirk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mars-Bound Hokie Posted February 3, 2020 Author Share Posted February 3, 2020 Widlock Kerman, being the daredevil that she was, designed a rocket-powered car that would be able to break Mach 1 and stop on a dime if necessary. After she broke the sound barrier, she took a selfie next to the speedometer. While she was posting it on Photogram, she lost control of the car and tried to stop it - but she forgot to install anti-lock brake systems on the wheels. She spun around her roll axis and flaming debris scattered everywhere. Her right arm and head were found near the protective fairing while the rest of her was under the dashboard. Spoiler Don't text and drive fly operate any vehicles, even if you have the badS gene. Ludlong Kerman - getting "high on speed." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rover 6428 Posted February 3, 2020 Share Posted February 3, 2020 (edited) The following is an extract from the 1006 history book "Kerbologia": "Another event that highlighted the start of the Recalimation Era is known as the Ludlong Attempt. Lord Ludlong Kerman, a highly renowed writer and explorer having conquered the Great Desert in the west and almost reaching the Northern Polar Ice Caps. Being known for his determination to reach further than ever before, Ludlong decided that his next goal would be to go as high as possible. So, in November 503, he announced his plan to the Royal Exploration Council. Unfortunatley, his plan was met with laughter and refused the funding. Despite of that, Lord Ludlong didn't give up, and used the remaining money that he gained from previous expeditions to fund his most noteable invention: an airship that he named 'Godspeed' (which is most commonly known as 'speed' as during launch the first three letters that were sewn to the body fell off). So, on the 42nd November of the same year, he took off. Not much is known about what happened to him during the expedition, as the only surviving recording of the assent stopped after the first six thousand meters, but it is universally accepted that Ludlong Kerman died from Hypoxia in the higher layers of the atmosphere long before his airship crashed in the Northern Mountain Range. Later, in Mai 739, Ludlong Kerman was officially accepted as a 'pioneer of spaceflight' and awarded the Green Martyr Award" Ripley Kerman: Val Henge Anomaly #103 Edited February 3, 2020 by Rover 6428 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KerbolExplorer Posted February 3, 2020 Share Posted February 3, 2020 Ripley kerman got killed by Jool's radiation field while exploring Val Papanov kerman-Hype Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirkidirk Posted February 3, 2020 Share Posted February 3, 2020 1 hour ago, KerbolExplorer said: Ripley kerman got killed by Jool's radiation field while exploring Val BOOOOORING, I know you can do better than that. 1 hour ago, KerbolExplorer said: Papanov kerman-Hype it was the year 2026, Papanov kerman was existing one day, when he saw the trailer for the new kerbal space program animated series titled "kerbal space program: yet another space odyssey" (which was a whopping 9382740348928497293473925739047t467289248 times more epic than the ksp 2 trailer). due to the immense hype he did get got from the trailer, he contractracted a rare disease known as "fatal heart attack", which killed him 4 seconds after the trailer ended. billy-bobney kerman - jool Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rover 6428 Posted February 4, 2020 Share Posted February 4, 2020 (edited) 14 hours ago, KerbolExplorer said: Ripley kerman got killed by Jool's radiation field while exploring Val I am SO glad that you post such interesting replies! It is very nice to know that the effort that I put in is not being SPAT on by flipping one-liners, as people who do that may as well not post here at all. papanov kerman died from hype because I couldn't care less. I am so tired of this. every time I post here I am met with a stupid one liner like this. So you know what? I QUIT. HAVE FUN LITERALLY REWRITING THE LAST FEW WORDS OF THE POST ABOVE BUT WITH SOME PUNCTUATION Edited February 4, 2020 by Rover 6428 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kerbiloid Posted February 4, 2020 Share Posted February 4, 2020 Unknown Kerman "Tired of one-liners" Secunda Kerman: the second line Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirkidirk Posted February 4, 2020 Share Posted February 4, 2020 (edited) 4 hours ago, kerbiloid said: Secunda Kerman: the second line after reading the second line of a 2 line horror story, Secunda Kerman screamed and began panicking. unbeknownst to Secunda, her screaming and running somehow destabilized a large superheavy cargo rocket, which spun out of control and exploded. Secunda kerman's house was the only home hit by the debris. billy-bobney kerman - jool you better not give a stupid one liner Edited February 4, 2020 by Dirkidirk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Satellitefanatic Posted February 11, 2020 Share Posted February 11, 2020 (edited) Billy-Bobney Kerman attempted to utilize jool as a gravity slingshot, he ran out of fuel in the middle of the maneuver, and descended into jool. He somehow survived the entry (Possibly debug menu), and plunged right into the -250m death sphere Greg Kerman-Mystery Goo Edited February 11, 2020 by Satellitefanatic Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
53miner53 Posted February 12, 2020 Share Posted February 12, 2020 Scientist Greg Kerman was on a mission to Duna, and decided to check the scientific experiments in deep space. Most of the data was transmitted back directly, but the automated observation equipment for the Mystery Goo was not responding. As he suited up, he wondered what could be going on, as the mystery goo was one of the most reliable experiments designed by kerbal engineers. It did not take long for him to find out. During his manual observation, he noticed that the mystery goo had fused with the automated equipment, but not before the goo noticed him. He pushed off, rapidly floating away from the spacecraft, but the goo flew after him, taking over his suit, and working its way into his body. His last words were a warning to the rest of the crew to abandon him to the goo, and his suit went silent, his lifeless body limp as the goo began to take control. No one would see him for 20 years, until a rescue mission found what was left of him, with the goo now fully in control, and Greg Kerman long dead. Kat Kerman, Curiosity Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mars-Bound Hokie Posted February 12, 2020 Author Share Posted February 12, 2020 47 minutes ago, 53miner53 said: Kat Kerman, Curiosity While driving along the surface of Duna, Kat Kerman noticed an old robot covered in dust and decided to check it out. She then stopped her rover five meters from the robot and reported its position to Mission Control, who told her that it was the old Curiosity rover. Kat took a brush from her belt and started getting the dust off the panels. Unbeknownst to her, BDArmory had bribed Mission Control to equip Curiosity with a loaded gun in case it was captured by extraterrestrial forces. To prevent friendly fire incidents, the rover had the exterior structure of KSP-issued suits logged in its memory banks. That way, it could tell who was a kerbalnaut and who wasn't. However, Kat was wearing a new suit variant and Curiosity's defense protocol had not been updated. As soon as power was restored, the robot mistook her for a hostile and shot her point-blank. By the time her crewmembers reached her distress beacon, which had been triggered by a suit breach as well as a medical trauma, it was too late. Kat Kerman had suffocated to death after all her oxygen leaked out of her suit's bullet hole. Lind Kerman - shark attack while sitting on the toilet Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirkidirk Posted February 12, 2020 Share Posted February 12, 2020 5 hours ago, Mars-Bound Hokie said: Lind Kerman - shark attack while sitting on the toilet one day Lind Kerman was diarrheaing on a toilet. the toilet doo doo pipe lead to the ocean, were a shark was existing. the shark smelled the waste, somehow, and became very angy. the shark swam to the source, through the sewer pipe, and destroyed the toiled, with lind sitting on it. danny kerman - tinkering with things he shouldn't have done the tinker to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Space Nerd Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 Danny Kerman was one day tinkering with cliped parts and a control panel that he found in the R&D building which says "physic settings, tinkering with it may summon the Kraken, so don't do that!" And he is pulled in a space-time rift. Scott Kerman-flying safe.(has this been done yet?) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirkidirk Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 (edited) 2 hours ago, Space Nerd said: Danny Kerman was one day tinkering with cliped parts and a control panel that he found in the R&D building which says "physic settings, tinkering with it may summon the Kraken, so don't do that!" And he is pulled in a space-time rift. Scott Kerman-flying safe.(has this been done yet?) scott kerman was one day flying safe, VERY SAFE. then a kerbal by the name of matt kerman got jealous, and shot a missile at scott's safe flyer. luckily, scott's seat ejected in time, unluckily, he is now flying without propulsion, and matt crashed into him. jeb kerman - jealousy (not jebediah, he would never give in to jealousy) Edited February 13, 2020 by Dirkidirk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Arcitect Posted February 13, 2020 Share Posted February 13, 2020 When jedediah got employee of the month! For the 2,060,890th time Jeb kerman self destructed. Kenny kerman - Abort system. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mars-Bound Hokie Posted March 10, 2020 Author Share Posted March 10, 2020 Kenny Kerman had just returned to Kerbin in a Poseidon spaceplane after ditching his tourists on the Mun. He soon realized that he was approaching the KSC too fast and at too high a pitch angle, so he panicked and pressed the "Abort" button. The crew cabin soon separated from the rest of the plane - whose engines were still running - and started coming down on the runway. Unfortunately, by the time he remembered that the emergency parachutes were a separate stage, it was too late to deploy them. The crew cabin crashed on the concrete runway at 97 meters per second, destroying it on impact. After the fire crews were done putting out the fire and fishing through the debris, they found Kenny's body crushed like a grape in the pilot's seat. The rest of the plane was found in pieces in the ocean. A week after the incident, Internal Investigations concluded that Kenny COULD have saved the spaceplane - and, by extension, his own life - if he: Remained calm Kept the engines at 1/3 throttle maximum Kept pitching up until the plane reached a positive angle Turned around 20 km from the space center to land at 2-7 KSC Bradley Kerman - undersized spacecraft Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirkidirk Posted March 10, 2020 Share Posted March 10, 2020 (edited) 15 hours ago, Mars-Bound Hokie said: Bradley Kerman - undersized spacecraft After 8 Years, Lots of Math, and Extreme Dedication, Bradley Kerman launched his most impressive spacecraft yet. A 43.6 ton ssto to Murble and back, NO REFUELING, NO ISRU, NO GRAVITY ASSISTS, AND AT 15% THE SPEED OF LIGHT. Unfortunately, there was something he didn't consider when building his spacecraft, an intervention from AN UNSEEN BLACK HOLE. his spacecraft didn't have enough delta-V to correct his course, and he missed the sun's sphere of influence by 2 AU. 4869 years later some rescue ship found the spacecraft pocketed with holes lanny kerman - lanny kerman Edited March 11, 2020 by Dirkidirk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HansonKerman Posted March 10, 2020 Share Posted March 10, 2020 lanny died from exsisting. Me - some accident involving a spacewalk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kerbiloid Posted March 11, 2020 Share Posted March 11, 2020 You were walking across the open space. The floor was wet, so you expectedly sat on it. The happy end: you survived. Kerman reached the Karman. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.