The "Useless Voyager" Competition

[VictoryNeverFail]

This is going to be a little contest, you see, we here at Victorian Rocketry want to recreate Voyager 1 and show aliens what the kerman race is like, and that of course is stupid and funny. Whoever sends in the dumbest space craft that is exiting the solar system (With footage of it before it escaped the sun's velocity as proof) wins! The rules are mods allowed, no cheat menu. Posts must be submitted by July 1, 12:00 AM, Central Time Zone. We are ready to see what idiotic and useless stuff you make!

 

-Victory Kerman

[RoninFrog]

Seems kind of like a craft sharing thread to me.

[Vanamonde]

Hey guy. You'll need to revise your rules. In KSP, the solar system extends forever (or actually until the number gets so large that it breaks computer math), so nothing can exit the solar system. 

[doggonemess]

5 hours ago, Vanamonde said:

Hey guy. You'll need to revise your rules. In KSP, the solar system extends forever (or actually until the number gets so large that it breaks computer math), so nothing can exit the solar system. 

True, but he says "escape velocity" from the sun, which is possible. I guess he just wants it to be on a trajectory that would eventually leave the solar system. 

[VictoryNeverFail]

1 hour ago, doggonemess said:

True, but he says "escape velocity" from the sun, which is possible. I guess he just wants it to be on a trajectory that would eventually leave the solar system. 

Yea, exactly

[Vanamonde]

Okay then.  

[JcoolTheShipbuilder]

What about a manhole cover?

[joshudson]

I might launch a probe core and a bunch of I-beams.

[doggonemess]

16 hours ago, JcoolTheShipbuilder said:

What about a manhole cover?

Make sure it's made of tungsten so it doesn't vaporize from the heat!

[doggonemess]

I'm proud (?) to present my offering for the Useless Voyager challenge - the Stupager! It's on its way to places unknown with every atmospheric sensor available. It also features parachutes and lights, cause you never know what will happen out there. The long piston on the right has a mystery goo container on the end, since we don't want that stuff anywhere near the spacecraft. 

A very special feature of Stupager is the Kerbalitiy Plaque. This features recordings of Kerbin with a four speaker hi-fi system for when the pink aliens find it in space! Our scientists assure us that the speakers work in a vacuum. Also present is a representation of a Kerbal so the strange creatures that find it will know what Kerbals look like.

To make sure I had enough delta-v, I went overboard on boosters (as always).

Here's the trajectory:

Amazingly, I discovered that I set up that Jool gravity assist accidentally when the second stage ran out of fuel. I then figured, why not, and adjusted it for a closer flyby.

 

Lev Aerospace - We'll do whatever the customer wants, no matter how dumb it is.

[JcoolTheShipbuilder]

probably going to send a solar sail out of the solar system as fast as possible