totm nov 2021 'Secrets' Of Life That Come With Adulting

[kerbiloid]

6 hours ago, Spacescifi said:

For every problem there is a solution

as said Joker, diving in the tank of the chemical one.

[Hyperspace Industries]

I’m not quite a full on adult yet, but still:

1. Do not try to “think positive”, that just results in thinking about how bad things are, try to find solutions instead. Not every problem has a solution (for example: hurricanes) but if there is a solution to the problem, use it. For example, you can’t stop the hurricane, but you can get to decent shelter and survive.

2. Being honest is a good idea, even (and perhaps especially) if that will hurt someones feelings. For example if someone makes bad food, do not say it is good if you do that they will make more bad food because they think you like it, until you either tell them their food is bad, hurting their feelings a lot more than if you said it from the start, or you die with a belly full of bad food.

3. Never spend more money than you need to, but don’t compromise too much quality.

4. (Advice from my dad) Never go in debt if you can help it!

5. Buying something you don’t need because it is cheap costs more money than not buying it at all. 

6. No one is born with social skills, and nobody has written them down, you need to learn them from mistakes, and everybody needs to learn them from mistakes. 

7. No matter how smart you are, you will always get things wrong, and if you’re as dumb as me, you will get a load of things wrong, just learn from your mistakes. I love it when I or someone else disproves one of my ideas.

[Kapitalizing Every Word]

1 hour ago, Hyperspace Industries said:

4. (Advice from my dad) Never go in debt if you can help it!

Oh. If only past presidents in my country heared this.

[Nuke]

i think i left out a few.

dont waste time chasing perfection, its unobtanium.
manors are free, broken bones are expensive. 
sometimes solving a problem is easier than complaining about the problem. when this is not true, complaining about the problem is pointless.
stop calling people stupid. for stupidity befalls everyone at some point no matter how smart they are (even einstein had his derps). 
its often hard to tell the difference between someone who is stupid from someone who is simply using their brain.
cats always find less enjoyment from a luxury item than the box it came in. humans should learn from this. 
don't go looking for dirt, you will find it. 
bacon can be used as an antidepressant.
you can never collect too many tools. 
never miss an opportunity to learn new skills, especially when it doesn't cost you anything. 
it never hurts to be frugal, if you spend all your money then you don't have any money. 
fast food is neither fast nor is it food. 
never waste good weather, especially if you live some place that doesn't get any. 
don't hold people to standards you cant hold yourself. 
when people are handing out free stuff, declining is always an option.
don't ask for help you don't need. save it for someone that does. 
if you find a good fishing spot, don't tell anyone about it. 
never pick up a crab by the front.
for those who live in rural areas, your front porch is often the best nature channel.
do not turn your burners up all the way, you will burn things. 
 

[kerbiloid]

2 hours ago, Nuke said:

cats always find less enjoyment from a luxury item than the box it came in. humans should learn from this. 

Cats know what's really important.

[Spacescifi]

2 hours ago, Nuke said:

i think i left out a few.

dont waste time chasing perfection, its unobtanium.
manors are free, broken bones are expensive. 
sometimes solving a problem is easier than complaining about the problem. when this is not true, complaining about the problem is pointless.
stop calling people stupid. for stupidity befalls everyone at some point no matter how smart they are (even einstein had his derps). 
its often hard to tell the difference between someone who is stupid from someone who is simply using their brain.
cats always find less enjoyment from a luxury item than the box it came in. humans should learn from this. 
don't go looking for dirt, you will find it. 
bacon can be used as an antidepressant.
you can never collect too many tools. 
never miss an opportunity to learn new skills, especially when it doesn't cost you anything. 
it never hurts to be frugal, if you spend all your money then you don't have any money. 
fast food is neither fast nor is it food. 
never waste good weather, especially if you live some place that doesn't get any. 
don't hold people to standards you cant hold yourself. 
when people are handing out free stuff, declining is always an option.
don't ask for help you don't need. save it for someone that does. 
if you find a good fishing spot, don't tell anyone about it. 
never pick up a crab by the front.
for those who live in rural areas, your front porch is often the best nature channel.
do not turn your burners up all the way, you will burn things. 
 

 

As per the usual... I agree and disagree... but most I like (not a bacon fan.... don't hurt me... sorry lol).

About the burners.... yeah... burned a few good pots that way learning how to cook. Patience is what one needs most cooking... along with a recipe and needed ingredients.

 

Learning a new thing only costs time... so learning a new thing depends on how much value you put on learning whatever it is.

 

Interests vary by individual, so so opportunities I may pass in a heartbeat others will take, and what others will pass I will eagerly lock down the opportunity to take.

[Stormpilot]

As Calvin (from Calvin and Hobbes) would like to put it (roughly I can’t remember well): “life sucks, You go to school 5 days a week then you go to university and then work until you die. You only get 5 years of happiness.”

[Gordon Dry]

The truth is the core energy. You need love to find it and you need to love it.

[Spacescifi]

THE CORRECT WAY TO BRUSH YOUR TEETH!

This one is a biggie. Even google will misdirect you on this.

My source of information is mostly my periodontist who I trust enough to pay $155 for this so you can trust me. Some of it (like about toothbrushes and oil pulling) is what I have personally learned.

Why we brush our teeth: To break up the gunk on our teeth so it does not harden and turn into a disease that wrecks our mouth.

 

Step one: Always use soft bristle toothbrushes. Never medium or hard. Since both will chip your teeth and lead to the edges looking ragged, and gradually make all your teeth shorter too.  Anyone who tells you to use hard or medium is doing so because they think your teeth are not white enough and think medium or hard brushes better. Except they brush TOO well. Remember your teeth are not a dirty cooking pan, nor should you scrub them like one. Medium and hard bristles scrub too hard and wear down and away your teeth literally before their time.

Use the right toothpaste: Dentists in the USA recommend the Sensodyne brand of toothpaste. The regular version is good enough.

The WRONG way to brush teeth: Back and forth or up and down. Saw-like motion with a lot of pressure applied is bad. Just about every American brushes this way, since no one tells us why not to. What it leads to is recession (gums receeding lower until the root of tooth is exposed, which makes it more likely to become infected and diseased). Ultimately it makes it easier to have sensitive to cold or painful teeth as well as the possibility of losing them.

The correct way to brush teeth: In a circular motion. You do not need nor should you apply a lot of pressure. The whole point of brushing teeth is to break up gunk on the surface, not to hammer them. Teeth are NOT like a counter or metal surface you need to scrub. Teeth are LIVING things! You scrub  hard like a countertop and you wear them away.

Correct way to floss: Not simply up and down, but below the gum line of the tooth and hug the tooth like a letter C. Doing this will clean the tooth better.

 

Conclusion: Cleaning teeth this way takes more time, but it is the difference between keeping healthy teeth and gums or ultimately losing them.

You will need patience.

 

If you do not wish to brush in a circular motion on each tooth, you may buy an electric toothbrush which does the same thing.

 

My own tip: Mouth rinses can and do lead to bleeding gums and dry mouth. An alternative is coconut oil. Leave it in your mouth and swish as much as you reasonably can for 20 minutes and spit it in the trash, not the sink as the oil will clog your sink.

Do not swallow the coconut oil as it will clog arteries plus make you swallow all the junk your teeth had on them.

Works quite well for whitening your teeth after you rinse them with water after brushing them.

It is called oil pulling, since the oil pulls the stains off your teeth.

 

PS: I hope you do not have a coconut allergy. If you do, then skip the coconut oil. There are other alternatives from the internet.

What I like about oil pulling is that unlike mouthwash, it does not sting or hurt my gums or teeth at all. I do not feel sore after.

Edited November 3, 2021 by Spacescifi

[Kerminator K-100]

On 10/10/2021 at 6:07 PM, Spacescifi said:

2.  Going to the same restaurant over and over seems to result in diminishing returns for most restaurants as the staff may begin to take your patronage for granted. On the other hand, if quality has not diminished despite this... you have found a rare but good thing. Still... murphy's law means that by virtue of regular visits you are more likely to find a decline in quality on occasion. As long as it has not become routine for you it should not be a problem for future visits.

I've always been of the opinion that when the employees in a restaurant start to recognize me, then its time to move on.

Sometimes its nice, like when I get coffee and the workers just ring me up and hand me my drink, but usually it makes me feel like I'm stuck in a rut.

On 10/13/2021 at 6:13 AM, Hyperspace Industries said:

3. Never spend more money than you need to, but don’t compromise too much quality.

4. (Advice from my dad) Never go in debt if you can help it!

5. Buying something you don’t need because it is cheap costs more money than not buying it at all. 

This is advice I have lived by for years, especially #5. Cheap things and sales always catch my attention, and give me an "I want this now look how cheap it is!!!" feeling. Its really hard to control that but you have to or else you will spend all your money.

3 hours ago, Spacescifi said:

My own tip: Mouth rinses can and do lead to bleeding gums and dry mouth. An alternative is coconut oil. Leave it in your mouth and swish as much as you reasonably can for 20 minutes and spit it in the trash, not the sink as the oil will clog your sink.

I really like your advice but I'd like to argue this point. I use a fluoride mouth wash everyday, and have never noticed any problems.

 

 

This thread is great, and I'd like to add some of my own.

 

- If you ever are having a bad day or feel depressed, go outside and take a walk. Changing up your surroundings, and getting exercise never fail to cheer me up, even on my worst days.

- Rejection is not the end of the world. Even if you think the other person would be perfect for you, someone else will come along who is even better. 

 

Edited November 3, 2021 by Kerminator K-100

[Spacescifi]

1 hour ago, Kerminator K-100 said:

I've always been of the opinion that when the employees in a restaurant start to recognize me, then its time to move on.

Sometimes its nice, like when I get coffee and the workers just ring me up and hand me my drink, but usually it makes me feel like I'm stuck in a rut.

This is advice I have lived by for years, especially #5. Cheap things and sales always catch my attention, and give me an "I want this now look how cheap it is!!!" feeling. Its really hard to control that but you have to or else you will spend all your money.

I really like your advice but I'd like to argue this point. I use a fluoride mouth wash everyday, and have never noticed any problems.

 

 

This thread is great, and I'd like to add some of my own.

 

- If you ever are having a bad day or feel depressed, go outside and take a walk. Changing up your surroundings, and getting exercise never fail to cheer me up, even on my worst days.

- Rejection is not the end of the world. Even if you think the other person would be perfect for you, someone else will come along who is even better. 

 

 

Haha.... perhaps my mouth is more sensitive due to gum recession I dunno.

On your romance advice yeah... I think that fits what I remarked earlier about how what you want both can and will change with time... and that includes the kind of person you would feel would be perfect for you.

 

Example? Say you are 25 and looking for that special someone.

 

Say you are 55 and looking for that special someone.

I reckon there is a very good possibility neither age would be looking for exactly the same kind of person.

 

Why? Not only does what you want change with time, but what you need also does... and that has a lot to do with the aging process.

An older person may not want to put up with the antics of a 20-something younger than them, and a younger person for obvious superficial reasons and serious longevity reasons may steer clear of a potential 55 year old mate.

 

For example, when I was younger I cared arguably too much about physical beauty and fitness.

 

Now that I'm  older I think mature behavior is more important, although if I found one who was both physically fit and mature enough to handle conflict resolution peacefully (preferring to attack the problem not the person),   that would be someone I would be strongly attracted to.

Edited November 3, 2021 by Spacescifi

[kerbiloid]

7 hours ago, Spacescifi said:

THE CORRECT WAY TO BRUSH YOUR TEETH!

Quote

'Secrets' Of Life That Come With Adulting

1. Take the teeth out,
2. Brush the teeth.
3. Put the teeth in.

[Spacescifi]

1 hour ago, kerbiloid said:

1. Take the teeth out,
2. Brush the teeth.
3. Put the teeth in.

 

I am younger than you think, likely younger than you (not hit my 40's yet).

I only say that because based on what you have typed up till now, and the stuff you recollect and the little you have said about yourself, there is no way you are a youngster.

 

Yet that is a worst case scenario for brushing teeth... provided they did not do it prior to needing the artificial ones.

Edited November 3, 2021 by Spacescifi

[kerbiloid]

I'm somewhat older, but that's the way of brushing which my grandad was used to.

[Spacescifi]

 

All my life I was unaware of this, although I had suspicions.

 

Clothing can be toxic: Common man-made fibers such as polyester and acrylic are basically toxic.

Polyester is a plastic derived fiber if I read correctly, and acrylic is a petroleum derived fiber.

They are good heat insulators, but they also release fumes that are known toxins. Mild symptoms can be lethargy or headaches. The hotter they become, the more likely fumes are released.

From what I read, they release known mutagen chemicals... in other words cancerous ones.

I am not trying to scare you or telling you to throw out all your synthetic fiber clothing. But caution is advised and I hardly recommend wearing synthetic manmade fibers regularly unless you have no other choice and have to.

 

Natural fibers are safer, but are also easier to tear, shrink, and wrinkle, and often more expensive.

All manmade fibers I read about had known toxins, such as rayon, nylon, and likely others I forget the names of.

Knowledge gives power. Ignorance deprives one of power.

 

The other really annoying thing about acrylic is that it traps odor.... even after washing.

Sure I could vinegar it overnight, but given all the toxins it has? I think not. I will just get rid of it.

Edited November 20, 2021 by Spacescifi

[wpetula]

1. If something seems too good to be true, it likely is. Be cautious moving forward. Consider the best, expect the worst.

2. Do not have your happiness depend on one person. I'm sure many of us have fallen into this trap, conscious or not. Relationships are naturally unstable, and if you let a relationship control your motivation for moving forward, your mental health will also be unstable. Branch out, find those simple pleasures, expand/reinforce your network of friends if possible, learn something new. That way, when the storm clouds come, you don't get soaking wet.

3. Don't be afraid of trying something new. You might fail miserably the first time around. Oh well! Give it another shot.

4. Don't be a prisoner of your past. Be someone of the present and future. 

5. Only you can make yourself happy. It's a hard pill to swallow, but it is true. Nobody will ever experience exactly what you did. Nobody has the perfect cure for your pain. Good people may offer you support, but it is your decision to take it. 

6. Sometimes the best answers are the most painful ones.

7. Support other people and help them to a better tomorrow. Be there for them, and one day, they may be there for you.

8. Understand that we are all human. We make mistakes, we change, we grow.

9. Your number one priority is ensuring your own long term happiness. Do your best, but know you can't do any more than that. Help others, but don't forget to also help yourself. You are all you have. 

[StrandedonEarth]

Learning the difference between necessities and luxuries can ward off starvation, especially when times get tough. It's surprising how many things people think are necessities are really luxuries.

[kerbiloid]

A brief summary.
 

Spoiler

If— by Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you
        Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
        But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
        Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
        And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
        If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
        And treat those two impostors just the same:

If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
        Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
        And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
        And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
        And never breathe a word about your loss:

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
        To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
        Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
        Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
        If all men count with you, but none too much:

If you can fill the unforgiving minute
        With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
        And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

[Hyperspace Industries]

1. (Turns out this is wrong, I was thinking of another word.) "Adulting" is another term for cheating on your wife, and also a giant sin. The correct word for this title is adulthood.

2. The most sensible thing to do with your possessions after you die is to make them blow themselves up (if you (like my grandfather) own a farm, I recommend nuclear explosions). My one grandfather (whom I barely knew) died almost six months ago and my mom is still working on the will, and her sisters are still putting her at risk of succumbing to her mental illness (can't remember the name). The will will probably take six more months or something.

Edited November 24, 2021 by Hyperspace Industries
Should I delete number 1?

[Superfluous J]

11 minutes ago, Hyperspace Industries said:

"Adulting" is another term for cheating on your wife, and also a giant sin.

Literally never heard that. I get the idea but no never once thought of it or heard it used in that way.

From Oxford:

adult·ing

/əˈdəltiNG,ˈaˌdəltiNG/

 

noun

informal

noun: adulting

1. the practice of behaving in a way characteristic of a responsible adult, especially the accomplishment of mundane but necessary tasks.

   "it feels really good to take a step back from adulting and have someone else cook dinner for me"

[StrandedonEarth]

2 hours ago, Hyperspace Industries said:

"Adulting" is another term for cheating on your wife, and also a giant sin.

I think the word you’re thinking of is “adultering” which isn’t actually a word according to the spellchecker. Adultery is the sin of cheating on one’s spouse 

[kerbiloid]

In Counter-Strike.

[Klapaucius]

On 10/11/2021 at 11:07 AM, Spacescifi said:

2.  Going to the same restaurant over and over seems to result in diminishing returns for most restaurants as the staff may begin to take your patronage for granted. On the other hand, if quality has not diminished despite this... you have found a rare but good thing. Still... murphy's law means that by virtue of regular visits you are more likely to find a decline in quality on occasion. As long as it has not become routine for you it should not be a problem for future visits.

I believe everyone should work at some point in a restaurant or some other public facing job. Nothing teaches you more about the importance of courtesy than dealing with both kind and difficult customers.

[Spacescifi]

6 hours ago, Klapaucius said:

I believe everyone should work at some point in a restaurant or some other public facing job. Nothing teaches you more about the importance of courtesy than dealing with both kind and difficult customers.

 

I have.

What my younger self learned... due to messing up enough for my boss to to even tell me... was be careful NOT to say what you are thinking.

What I learned personally was never to get too casual with customers even though they did with me.

At various points I was invited to parties after work by strangers (teenage customers).

It's ok for a customer to say something frank because they do not have a job to lose... but not you if you have the job.

Edited December 7, 2021 by Spacescifi

[Spacescifi]

Wow..  I need to use the internet less... it's just an easy dopamine booster for me.

 

The following video is insightful, as it explains WHY we feel as we do and what we can... if you so choose, do about it. Great for teens and adults.