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Stranded: A Kerbal Epik


Staticalliam7
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Chapter 1

 

Abort system is armed.

Flight, we are go.

 

“Calm down Wernher, we’ve tested this millions of times, there’s no chance that it will fail.”

“I know, there just seems like something always goes wrong.”

“Here, have a glass of whiskey. Lighten up. This is a historic day, and you need to enjoy it. You’re like Mortimier sometimes. ”

(Over intercom) “Hey! I heard that”

“Thanks James.” Wernher nervously chuckled

 

Engine ignition in 10..

9..

8..

7..

6..

5..

4..

3..

2..

1..

Engine ignition

Liftoff of Eve 1, on their way to the Perseverance Station


 

“JEB! We need those snacks for later. Besides, you’re gonna throw up if you keep eating them.” Bob scolded Jeb. Jeb proceded to throw a doughnut at Bob.

“Relax, the station has plenty”

Valentina said as she socked Jeb in the shoulder

“Ow.”

 

We have stage one separation.

 

Bob glared at Val.

 

Welcome to space, Eve 1. 

 

Stage two separation.

 

Reaction control systems are online.

 

“Alright Jeb, do your stuff” Bill said anxiously

“Don’t mind if I do” Jeb said in the most ridiculous Bill accent he could muster up

Bill rolled his eyes. 

“You guys need to take this more seriously. This isn’t some joke”  Bob told them.

“And you need to relax sometimes. You’re like Mortimier.”

(Over comms) Very funny. 

Val chuckled. 

“Alright no more nonsense, we are approaching Perseverance.”

“Val, what’s it look like?”

“I need 20 degrees of roll.”

“In what direction, Val?”

“Left hand sid-” The ship suddenly jerked, and Val hit her head on the ceiling, “OW! My left, Jeb. And take it a little slower, for Kraken’s sake”

“Got it.”

“We are 30 meters out. Jeb, we are going a tad bit fast, slow it down. Alright.. And...”

Clunk

“Beautiful. Mission control, we are docked.”

 

Excellent. Transferring control to Jeb.

You are go to initiate gravity spin.

 

“Hold on to your hats, space cowboys, we are about to get some sweet gravity.”

Val rolled her eyes.

“Initiating spin.”

“Woah, that was quick” Bill exclaimed.

“One G.”

 

We are looking at engine ignition in T-3h.

 

“Copy that. Time to get comfortable.”

“Jeb, we have to do a system check”

“But Bobbbbbbbbb, that’s boringgg”

“Stop being a baby.”

“Whyyyyy”

“Because that’s part of your job”

“Ugh, okay”

 

(3 hours later)

 

This is mission control, you are go for Kerbin escape burn

 

“Copy that. Jeb, prepare for engine ignition.”

“We have engine ignition, Bob.”

 

“We have engine cutoff.”

 

So, uh Jeb.. Sorry to break it to you, but you’re gonna have to use the cyropods. Control says there won’t be enough snacks for the whole trip

 

Jeb groaned. 

“Seriously?! So not only do I have to put up with Bob’s complaining, but I have to sleep for 6 months? C’mon, how lame.”

Bob rolled his eyes. “This is why we didn’t tell you. I knew you would complain.”

“Well, might as well get over with it. To the cyropods, brave adventurers!

Val rolled her eyes.

Edited by Staticalliam7
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Bit of a short chapter, trying to formulate ideas on how to make the plot more interesting in future chapters

Chapter 2

 

6 months later. 

 

Jeb stomped around the bunkroom singing:

“GOIN TO EVEEEE! GOIN TO EVEEEEE! GOIN TO A BIG PURPLE EVEEEEEE!” 

“Ow, Jeb we just woke up, keep it down.” Val complained

“At least he’s in a good mood” Bob said

Bill bumped his head on the bunk. “Ow. Can we see it yet?”

“Yeah, look, it’s the tiny purple spinning dot”

“Oh ok, cool. I’m going to take a nap.”


 

Get ready for Eve capture burn in T-5 hours. Jeb knows what to do. Hopefully. *cough*. Bob, while you’re waiting, this would be a great time to do some science experiments.

 

“Fun.”

 

5 hours later

 

“Jeb get rea- Jeb?”

Val tapped the now asleep Jeb on the shoulder, clearly exhausted from singing for 4 hours straight. He whined, “Mommy, I don’t want to go to school, I’m tired.”

“JEB.”

He jumped. 

“I’M AWAKE.” he screamed while frantically pushing light switches. He knocked over a bag that said, ‘KRAKN DELITES! Now with 20% more space!

“Oh, it’s just you Val. What’s up.”

“Wake up, capture burn in 10 minutes. Get dressed, Bill will kill you if he sees you in pajamas this late. And clean up the mess. “ *chuckle*

BUMP

“Careful out there, Bob. Time to come back in”

(Over comms) Got it, Jeb. Coming back now


 

“Strap in buckaroos, time for capture burn.”

Everyone rolled their eyes (honestly not surprising at this point. Their eyes are gonna get stuck if the keep rolling them this much)

 

[convenient time skip]

Nice one, Jeb. Once we get a full rundown of the base systems and weather conditions, we’ll start planning ground operations.

Edited by Staticalliam7
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Chapter 3: From the KSC Administration Building  

 

“Walt, have you handled the public?” said a deep and mysterious voice.

“Sir, the public is completely unaware. It seems that the.. substance has caused them to forget that the crew exists.”

“Excellent… What is the progress on the.. project”

“Full steam ahead. It should be done by Kristmas.”

“Good… Is the crew aware of the plan?”

“No sir.”

“I see you have this handled. I will return to check on you later.”

“Hail Kraken.”

“Hail Kraken.”

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On 11/14/2021 at 4:40 PM, Staticalliam7 said:

 

Chapter 3: From the KSC Administration Building  

 

“Walt, have you handled the public?” said a deep and mysterious voice.

“Sir, the public is completely unaware. It seems that the.. substance has caused them to forget that the crew exists.”

“Excellent… What is the progress on the.. project”

“Full steam ahead. It should be done by Kristmas.”

“Good… Is the crew aware of the plan?”

“No sir.”

“I see you have this handled. I will return to check on you later.”

“Hail Kraken.”

“Hail Kraken.”

Hmm I sense this that this group of people might be involved in a cult or a different country can't wait to see what pans out

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