ColdJ Posted January 2 Share Posted January 2 Geonovast became afraid. He expected the safety inspector to appear before dark, as the team thought that massive boosters might counter the lack of struts on Kerbin. The mission would gradually devolve into reaction wheels, something literally revolutionary to Kerbalkind. How extraordinary that is, considering the effort required to make big ol' pitch forks and feather dusters with large torches, and wiggly tentacles playing the piano for fun. Exactly one week later, the inspector woke to find a great disturbance in the force - a PowerPoint presentation. The horror of it overcame him with great quantum superlinearecitation. A Massive vortex opened to reveal a terrifying cake-producing monster. The inspector immediately panicked and reached for his pogo-stick, deftly bouncing off the bed that he was floating on down the Nile and into the grasp of Curveball-Anders who spontaneously barfed. Rutabaga, meanwhile, emerged in the river of dreams. Snark saw Kerbiloid and thought, is that Adsii? What strange and bizarre manifestations appear when Aerodynamic Kerbal suffers from a ColdJ virus. Deddly, Vanamonde and TakeTwo ninja'd the cake as Admiral-Fluffy forlornly tried to soak a stolen dry bagel in lox. The cake-producing monster began slithering towards the first person to run a bakery in the best area of Dakota. Competition wasn't anything the monster felt like wasting time on. However, the mountain of cake was devoured by the kraken, leaving a steaming pile of useless debris. Boris (the monster) started a clearance war while Adsii cleaned his plate with an explosion of flavour that could've potentially rivaled the famed Tibetan chocolate croissant. Meanwhile 18watt, Nazalassa and Starhawk were hatching a plan to take over Minmus with an icecream van. Scoops of Minmuscream were flung in every possible direction, while Vanamonde insisted on waffle-cone diplomacy complete with toppings and spoons. The outcome of the event was uncertain; the icecream was completely consumed by Gargamel and the cones became crushed from lack of enthusiasm by the moderators. The inspector later wrote a scathing report; despite having no memory of previous events, it was imaginative and entertaining in its depiction of strange hallucinations and bizarre potatoes. He was deliberately throwing doubt across the entire Kerbol system as to what had happened, so more inspectors arrived to grab a bunch of managers to remove the sting of the report. However, before they were ready for publishing, the Kraken released a piece of artwork based on macaroni cheese to surpass the wiggly tentacles playing the piano for fun. This caused a hyperbolic frenzy in publishing the report, resulting in an outrage against its writers, who then asked, "Where are the snacks?" Boris suddenly saw an opportunity to sell copious amounts of Snacks. Hot cupcakes sold like hotcakes and cold cake sold like cold cream cups (which are good for puffy eyes). But something unexpected did occur: the inspector shared his lunch and threw a party for everyone, although Geonovast excluded Gargamel. Curveball-Anders took everyone to the local ice cream-pizza-pinball-chicken-applesauce-candy-methalox-whole_pineapple-drywall parlour and asked for some funds from the waiter, who choked on the pinball release-lever, tilting the machine over. "Funds!" he exclaimed flabbergastedly," you want my FUNDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!" "HOW DARE YOU EVEN SUGGEST SUCH A THING!" "WHY I OUGHTA..." the waiter fumed indignantly as he gasped for air, collapsing while clutching his ukulele. "Oh crud," he wheezed into a squeezebox, which inflated to the size of a prize-winning pumpkin. "A prize", said Starhawk, "is worth funds." Tiredly, the waiter raised a kickstarter campaign to capture the wiggly tentacles playing the piano for fun, and a plan was beginning to form in his mind. He imagined a B.O.B (Battle of the Bands) in which Jeb, for marketing purposes, screamed an Electric-Guitar intro of "Let's go Crazy". The monster, however, preferred Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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