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If you were the first person on mars, what would you say?


KleptoKat

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"I now acknowledge the realisation that, after all, I am on land not belonging to any country. Therefore, I declare a mutiny against NASA and will now instruct my team to send a solemn message to JPL, stating that we aim for freedom from the United States of America and will not respond to further prompt. I will ask Bill here to place a flag beside the hab, proclaiming this territory a monarchy in my sake. Okay now Bill send this video to JPL- *RECORDING FINISHED*"

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  • 1 month later...

HAHA! SCRW YOU NIEL ARMSTRONG! Wait, what? the camera wasn't on? Damnit! We got all the way to a desert so old it's rusting, and the camera isn't on? Well, John, I hope you like botany, because were leaving you here with a liter of hydrazine and a potato.

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*Falls off the ladder right before someone else steps on Mars for the first time* "It wasn't me!"

"That's one small step for man, brought to you by our sponsor: [insert company name here]"

"Joke's on you Earth, this is a soundstage on Pluto!"

"Ha!  Take that h8ers!"

"My booty itches."

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This goes out to my Eighth Grade Math teacher, Mrs. Smith who said that I would never amount to anything. The one who wrote me a detention when my phone buzzed in class but ignored it every time someone else in the class had their phone go off, and who selectively graded the homework problems I got wrong. Also to Billy, the middle school bully who started rumors about me, pushed me down in the halls, and threw his gym shoes at me in the locker room. And last but definitely not least, the teacher lady from that summer camp I volunteered to assist at three years ago, who was unappreciative of my efforts and volunteered time and called me 'fat and lazy'. I just wanted to say, with the world as my witness: Screw you guys, I'm the first person on mars.

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"Hey guys, is the lander supposed to be on fire?"

"Wasn't there supposed to be an accent vehicle somewhere around here?"

"Ha!  Joke's on you NASA, this is totally a soundstage, it doesn't even have the fight gravity...  ...  Wait...  ...  Oh, never mind."

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"We come here today, not in the name of showing others we are superior, but in the name of peace and science, for all Mankind."

The 2nd thing spoken on Mars would be: "Wait, there's no Wi-Fi!!!! THERE'S NO WI-FI!!!!! NOOOO!!!!"

Edited by DolphinDude3
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On 18/2/2016 at 10:47 AM, DolphinDude3 said:

"We come here today, not in the name of showing others we are superior, but in the name of peace and science, for all Mankind."

The 2nd thing spoken on Mars would be: "Wait, there's no Wi-Fi!!!! THERE'S NO WI-FI!!!!! NOOOO!!!!"

: )

"oki, as expected no wi-fi here but i don't care i can fold my soup rationnement packages while thinking about Higgs Boson mechanics and while playing farmville for real"

"but, but, what about the fact i can't log to facebook due too post synchro to share some nice pic ?"

: ) - you & me & you - cc licence =(xDr that neutral link'all'n ... pfffft ; )

Edited by WinkAllKerb''
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