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Grumpy old kerbals!


MissStabby

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Since KSP has progressed quite a bit over the past few versions, i noticed a few of my older kerbals starting complain about how modern kerbals have it too easy with all kinds of extras.

One of the things i heard them say was:

"In my days, when we landed on the moon, we didnt have landinglegs, we used fins to support our craft!"

Did anybody also heir their senior kerbals complain about the modern days? if so, add them to the thread ;)

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Slightly related, I've started using "Kiss my Kerbals" as a generic retort.

On topic, I hear Cosby Kerman talking about the rattle tatting with the whizzpop flangey whatsum a lot. I think he might be losing his replacement marbles.

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"Pah! They know nothing about the old days. They keep lookin' too far out! All they get is trouble for them. Back in the day, we kept on flyin' to the Mun and we set up a colony when we had no docks or stations or 'Hitchhiker Pods' or any other crazy mumbo-jumbo."

- Sigster Kerman

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You think you kids got it hard? Hell, back in MY day you did'nt even have the mun! Forget your lander legs, we landed in our engines cause we didn't have fine either! Wait, we did'nt even have the game itself. Think you're old? I remember when the game did'nt even exist!

So get your stupid interplanetary junk off my orbit, or I'm gonna shove it to the dark side of Kerbin!

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"Where'd all you upstart youngsters come from anyway? I remember back when it was just the three of us; now I don't even know how many of you are trying to shove yourselves into my flight rotation. I used to get every flight, now I'm lucky to get back flying status after just every little capsule dis-assembly incident."

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Back in my day we didn't have no fancy docking clamps or even rendezvous. No, if we wanted to do a handshake in space (that's what we called it) we had to wait days for the right alignment cause we didn't have no voodoo magic time warp neither. And then we had to eyeball our orbits because the altimeters only went to 100 meters and then we had to EVA before there was EVA and push our capsules together. And then we only had a 1 in 1,000,000,000,000,000 chance of pulling that off. By Jool, I still have brave Kerbalnauts out there somewhere. Poor devils.

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I don't *have* any veterans.

They all died long, long ago. Granted, we still have the fingers we cut off to clone replacements from, but the clones can't remember anything the originals did...

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Now lemmie tell you a story. *sits of rocket chair in front of young kerbals* It was way back in 0.12... There I was, with bob and bill at my side. We were adventurous young whipper snappers we where. But we weren't enough for the kraken. One day we went after that terrible beast. For twenty days and nights we set for the sun. We took the old escape trajectory. Their it was blazing and magnificent. We sent that rocket right to the center we did! And when we reached the center, the physics, holy kraken those physics went to minmus with us! We were shot out at one sixth the speed of light. We had to be cloned for us to see the light of kerbol again! Now let that be a lesson to you! NEVER SET OUT FOR THE KRAKEN!!!!

Edited by AHO
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'Back in my day we had no fancy-schmancy solar panels, we had to crank the old electro-mat inside the capsule! And we managed to fit three of us in a 1 meter pod! You 'youngsters' can barely fit ONE!'

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What's with that all this whining about how hard it is to get to Moho? In my day, it was hard to reach, AND then when you did get there, it cooked your ship until the landing gear blew up. Now THAT was a planet! It took a real neuter green creature to land on that monster of a world!

And doors? Who needs doors? I mean, we had them, but our engineers hadn't figured out how to open them yet. So we'd land on Mun or Minmus, look out the window, and try to deduce things from sheer observation. Now THAT takes some scientific skill!

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Why you kids with your skipper engines and Nuclear waste buckets! Back in my day, we used to land on Minmus with nothing but an Ant engine! We would escape the atmosphere with nothin' but RCS! we didn't have those fancy mainsails and SAS computers. we had our wits and skill!

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You youngsters have everything the easy way. Back in my day, we didn't have struts. If you built a rocket with more than one stack, you had to use a little thing called DESIGN to make sure that the craft would just go into a nice spin instead of wobblin' all over the place and smashing into itself. And if it DID smash into itself? Well you just jettisoned that stage and kept on going to orbit, because we were PREPARED for these sorts of things!

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