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Kerbish holiday songs!


Whackjob

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Ti's the season. Let's begin the singing. I will begin.

On the Twelfth day of Launch window,

The Engineer team gave to me

Twelve boosters boosting

Eleven decouplers splitting

Ten RCS nozzles flowing

Nine seperatrons blasting

Eight stages staging

Seven stacks a-dropping

Six engines glowing

Five batt-man batteries

Four broken struts

Three scared Kerbals

Two floodlamps flooding

and docking clamp in the wrong stage!

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The first on the Mun

Jebediah did say

Were certain poor Kerbals

Forgotten today

On the Farside where they

Their vigil still keep

'Round their wrecked lander lying

In a crater so deep

O-oh well, oh well

oh well, o-oh well

If they ever get back here what stories they'll tell

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Rockets we have heard on high

Oft exploding o'er the plain

And their pilots in reply

Screaming out this sad refrain

Oh no-o-o-o, oh no-o-o-o, oh no-o-o-o, ho-lycrap

In explosions die, oh

Oh no-o-o-o, oh no-o-o-o, oh no-o-o-o, ho-lycrap

In explosions die, oh

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Jingle Bob Kerman

Launching through the snow

In a tiny pod all the way

Through the black we go

Screaming all the way!

(ARGH!)

Making flames so bright

What fun it is to dive and land

On the Mun maybe tonight!

Chorus:

Oh landing legs, landing legs

Breaking every time!

Oh what fear I feel

On this flight

In a one man Kerbal can!

Hey!

Landing legs! Landing legs!

Breaking every time!

Oh what horror it is to fly

In a one man Kerbal can!

A day or two ago

They said I'd take this flight

And soon Verner von Kerman

Seated by my side

The mission plan was told

Misfortune seemed so bold

He got into flight details

And the horror began to grow!

{chorus}

A day or two ago

The story I must tell

I went into the Kerban Can

And on my back I fell

As the door sealed tight

In a one man Kerbal can!

They laughed as there I sprawling lied

But quickly muted mic!

{chorus}

Now the ground is gone

Go fly while you're young

Tell the girls goodnight,

And sing this flying song!

Just get some chutes nailed on

To slow this horror speed

Open them and slow as I go

And land maybe in one piece!

screenshot96_zps725ecc5f.png

Edited by Whackjob
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To the tune of "Oh Come Oh Come Emanuel"

Oh come oh come recovery crew

And save me from this desolate moon

I really want to make it home

'Cause all my snacks are now gone

Chorus:

Rejoice, Rejoice, Jebediah's on his way

With chips and salsa I will eat today

Oh come and bring your extra delta-V

And land within 1km from me

If need be I'll extreme EVA

To get the snacks you've toted all this way

Chorus

I probably could make it home from here

I've been sitting here for over a year

I could try to throttle up and leave

But Alas I'm not Scott Manley

Chorus

Oh Jebediah how did you crash too?

All that I saw was your can of Goo

Go flying past at escape velocity

Now Where's the snacks 'cause I'm hungry

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Deck the pad with big orange tanks

Ka-la-la-la-la, la-la, la, la

Excitement fills the kerbonaut ranks

Ka-la-la-la-la, la-la, la, la

Jeb is in his space apparel

Ka-la-la, la-la-la, la, la, la

As the ground crew bids him farewell

Ka-la-la-la-la, la-la, la, la

Jeb is on his way to Duna

Ka-la-la-la-la, la-la, la, la

With more boosters he'd get there sooner

Ka-la-la-la-la, la-la, la, la

Bob prepares the rescue ship

Ka-la-la, la-la-la, la, la, la

'Cause Jeb didn't plan the return trip

Ka-la-la-la-la, la-la, la, la

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The KSP recruiting jingle :)

Oh come all ye Kerbals, cowardly and stupid

Come ye, oh come ye to K S C

Come and get blasted (maybe to the heavens)

Refrain

Oh come let us do Science

Oh come let's fly for Science

Oh come let's die for Science

At K S C

See how the Kerbals volunteer in masses

Lo! They abhor not to die in flames

We, too, will thither bend our happy footsteps

Refrain

Roar, choirs of boosters, roar in exultation

Roar that maybe we'll get to space today

Glory to boosters, MOAR is always better

Refrain

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(To the tune of "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer")

Jebediah, the cheerful Kerbonaut,

Had a very shiny nosecone,

And if you ever saw it;

you would even say it glows.

All of the other Kerbonauts

Were very jealous of his fame;

They never let poor Jebediah

Join in any Kerbal games!

Then one foggy Kerbmas Eve

Santa came to say;

"Jebediah with your rocket so bright,

Won't you launch my sleigh tonight?"

Then all the Kerbals loved him

As they shouted out with glee;

"Jebediah, the cheerful kerbonaut,

You'll go down in history!"

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I've kerbalised a few things for Christmas. But they have threads of their own, so I'll just put teasers here.

This was an Australian song:

-snip-

"We'll help you find your mummy, son. Hop up on the sleigh!"

yGD9CdVl.png

♫So up inside the metal sled, little Joey hopped.♪

♪But they hadn't gone far when Santa stopped.♫

le2aDtBl.png

♪Unharnessed the jet engines, and Joey wondered why.♪

♫Then, he heard explosions, far of in the sky.♪

♫Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom!♫

BFkPQrCl.png

........

-snip-

This was written for the arrival of the last update, but the thing it's based on was about Christmas all the same:

-snip-

...

He sprang to his ship, to his team gave a whistle,

And they all flew away, like an unguided missile.

But I heard him exclaim, as he faded from sight,

"Have fun with 0.22, and to all a good night!"

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Blasting through the sky

In a Mk. 1 Lander Can

O'er the Mun we go

Out of fuel again

Spamming science quick

Before they're crashed and burned

What fun it is to fly and sing

A rocket song tonight!

Engine bells, engine bells

Blazing all the way

Oh what fun it is to ride in a Mk. 1 Lander Can

BOOM!

Engine bells, engine bells

Overheating, NO!

Really wish I'd quicksaved cause now Jeb is gonna die!

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I would like to dedicate this song to Dunbas Kerman, who is currently sitting on Laythe, alone and with about five gallons of fuel left in his FL-T200 tank. I'll send a rescue crew up... someday.

Ahem.

I'll Get Back to Kerbin

I'll get back to Kerbin...

Though I'm stuck on Laythe.

This nasty moon,

So full of dunes

and seas in which I bathe!

Delta-V is all gone.

Certainly, it seems:

I'll get back to Kerbin,

but only in my dreams!

But only in... my dreams.

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