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I wont be around for awhile I have some sad news ...


Cdr_Zeta

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Cancer and other illnesses has a big impact on lives. We lost family members, friends, and celebrities due to cancer. Two years ago I was saddened when Edd Gould passed away. He was my favourite animator and people will know him as the 'I like trains' kid. A family friend of mine passed away and my grand parents in China could be next. Stay bright even through the darkest hours.

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  • 4 weeks later...

Hi All ...

WOW...KSP Beta-h than evah ! I just read a blog and this is gonna be a nice xmas present for me.

My wife had lots of pains these last few weeks but she seems to have improved - ALOT atleast for now - we think she over did work outside a few weeks earlier I hope that is what it was.

All the tests - well we seem to be in the same boat but at least pain wise I think we gonna have a Christmas this year; her spirits are doing well and we both have improved the last week or so.

We really wont know anything for about 6-8 more weeks but I am hopeful; I think we are lucky we caught it when we did; she was always a lucky gal.

I have my upgraded computer back online - upgraded hers - we are saving $100 a month on bills this next year...and I really miss KSP and it looks like I can get back into 'the game' for awhile and stream again.

We do the best and only what we can and just have to keep going; it is what all those who have come before us would want us to do.

Thank you all for your support and I will keep you posted.

Mr Zeta

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Hi All,

Well we had our second round of chemo and she is doing really well; she doesnt seem to be having the pains she did those few weeks; she is tough.

Looks like we will have a good XMAS holidays this year and we have ALOT to be thankful for over the years; I wouldnt be where I am today without her and family; I have to keep thinking of that; neither of us would be where we are; we have good memories and maybe I can renew some of those old mountain climbing memories next year; I think it is important to soak up as much of 'creation' as we can thru life.

Zeta

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Hi,

Thanks for the cheers...the chemo and some excitement took a little toll these last few days but she is doing okay I think...

As for KSP well I been alpha testing a game - thought it was goin well ... well with so much lagg I dont think I can play it; kind of sad too I had high hopes for it; all I can say is that Star Wars Galaxies was still a 'TOP' game for me...I may look at SWGEMU again and see how they are doing.

I had a slight problem recently - I may have lost a Seagate Terabyte drive; it just died; I was runnin my main Win7 OS on it; luckily I am smart enough to have had most of the stuff on there backed up as far as I know and no 'important' stuff on it; it needs to be recovered; ugh; I lost 'ALL' my KSP mods etc but no matter I will just start again right it seems as though I am good at that in life; starting over; KSP helps me keep the faith ...

I thought about swapping out the drive circuit board but I dunno I have to do some research. I am into computers pretty much and I know you can recover drives using USB, and that Western Digital charges $4000 more or less LOL ya ok...right!

I think the drives are matched to the circuit board inside I wouldnt be surprised; I need to call the local store here or go over and find out I think they charge $150 plus the price of a drive - about $250 altogether - my Star Citizen savings haha.

Time to go for now ...

MrZeta

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  • 2 months later...

Hello,

I will check that link out thanks ! Also I found videos on Youtube which didnt even occur to me to look; it is a bit tacky trying to open the drive up and move the drive head but sure is worth a try; I would probly build up the 'Clean Box' to do it tho; I have a little dust around here.

My wife has one more chemo round left and was supposed to get that petscan; they seem to want to delay it; I am gonna find out what is the deal here I think the last time they didnt follow up I cant keep track of anything.

Outside of that she seems to be doing well; I been lookin at the Keno Cancer Diet for both of us; that is a tough road to follow but I understand how it works; I aint following it very well tho but it is haunting me.

I am worried about the medical profession; one doctor for 5000 patients seriously; take a pill and call me? We seem to be doing okay for now; I just want that petscan done and we most likely need to go go for nutrition help at the hospital.

She is really tough and been thru alot; I keep thinking of the last days almost every day and what it would be like alone; working on KSP helps to keep me sane; I am on a scary lonesome road my life seems to be like that anyways due to my interests in life.

I also have higher callings and interests that keep me motivated in life; some things like a Destiny that few people have or even care about; trouble is I dont believe half of what my Destiny calls for but I pick away at it; it is all anyone can do.

Cmdr Zeta

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hello,

So things have been on level ground and we will have survived the winter...wow and what a winter this has been all over the place.

I just saw a video that the sun had a hole in it back in 2013; it was a cold spot; nothing too serious but wow it looked just like the Monolith eating up Jupitor; oh yea and there's a Monolith on Phobos?! I am almost ready to look for Monoliths in KSP now ! They say we are actually warming up; not from where I sit !

With that hopeful news tomorrow my wife gets the test results and we talk about it; I am hopeful she is tough I dont know how she does it; I know if this ever happens to me I know who I will be thinking of when I have to go thru what she went thru; it has been a tough road for both of us; I am feeling some bit of luck and hopefulness around.

Thanks for sending thoughts our way and I will let you know soon...

Cmdr Zeta

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I'm so sorry to hear this, tell your wife she has our thoughts and prayers. My Grandather died of cancer 3 years ago, it was actually amazing, really. He had extreme pain in his back that he thought was from a recent surgery, but it turned out to be liver cancer. He passed away the night after they found out. We had a hard time of course, but we were so glad it was as quick as it was.

Stay strong!

-Slab

- - - Updated - - -

I am worried about the medical profession; one doctor for 5000 patients seriously; take a pill and call me? We seem to be doing okay for now; I just want that petscan done and we most likely need to go go for nutrition help at the hospital.

Cmdr Zeta

I would consider getting someone else that's able to spend more time and be closer, that will probably help alot. I broke my arm right after this past christmas and I was fortunate to get a very good doctor who cared, and was patient, and was very conservative with surgery as to the pros and cons of an immediate fix vs. the trauma that surgery does. I hope things work out for you.

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Hello all,

So...ya...REMISSION...they said up to 90%...I am very happy for us both...all we can do now is hope for the best and take every day as we can..Thank you all for your support; I am just living for the day when this cancer stuff comes back...but until then we move on and forward and live for the next day no matter what tries to shake us down...

With all the sadness and hatred in the world today this also makes me sad and ask why; why cant we just agree to disagree yet live together in peace; each and every one of us has a reason to be on this wonderful planet; I guess some in the world will never see past that and some will never understand it nor bother to care; I am lucky and some of us are lucky and I never loose faith in that; and if I have no luck then I have to work hard to find it.

My wife always seemed to have luck on her side I can always sense that; when I lose her I will lose my good luck charm...until then I look to the skies...

Cmdr Zeta

Edited by Cdr_Zeta
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Hello,

Thank you for the support...well now some more bad news her mom passed on last nite it was kind of a shock for her...now I have to rent a car to go to New York to see the inlaws...not such a happy prospect things are so squirley down there and my wife was just gettin to feel better. I had a feeling things werent goin so well for her mom at least we saw her at her sister's son's wedding and she seemed well there but things went downhill afterwards...it is all for the better she wasnt doing well...sad. She was 70 something.

My mom well she is like 86 and I swear I think she is gonna outlive me; she has done ALOT for me and we are close; we are lucky to have good family when we have them...if it wasnt for our parents we wouldnt be here.

Cmdr Zeta

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hi all,

Actually the trip wasnt so bad this time around...the trip that is...usually I get really tired and I did a few times but the 9 hour or so drive wasnt as bad as the last time; I kind of dred the drive but I did okay; just dont think about it and do it as they say worked well for me.

The visit was as expected and everything went ok except for one major hiccup; lesson learned about activating credit cards when you leave yer home state...ya.

It's kinda difficult to get back into streaming...I got some work to do and spring is finally starting to spring so I have to do some more work I dred that too; at least I can finally get outside and get some fresh air.

This winter has been somewhat profitable with my telescope; I can not finally look at the pictures whenever I get time; I will be sharing that on KSP streams as soon as I get an orbital observatory built !

For now I am just working on contracts to get to $600K; orbital contracts are barely in range I may have to run more tests (sim-tests that is!) today; I havnt played for awhile so simming is in order...

Cmdr Zeta

Edited by Cdr_Zeta
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9 hours isn't too bad in my book. My last trip up (Cape Elizabeth) took me nearly 12 hours. Then again, having 3 women in the car with mandatory rest stops every 2 hours does take its toll... they all have bladders the size of thimbles lol. :rolleyes:

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  • 3 weeks later...

Hello,

Update...Tests have my wife in remission...at least for awhile...prayers and thoughts help ya never know!

Now you can pray for me I am losin a tooth today..I guess one fellow on stream lost 3...ouch...I need to get my xrays updated I feel bad about it and let them go...argh.

Zetadude

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  • 4 weeks later...

Hello,

Well we are back at it again - 3rd time cancer...I wont be streaming nearly as much...I am moving my computer station...a week of radiation treatments...chemo maybe not I dont know...I dont have much of any family on the web - a few places including here...I do have a donations page on my stream site - Paypal only...any donations are going to her til whenever...I am gonna work on other projects so I can be around her more.

She will be picking up as she usually does - she is strong-willed and always finds happiness...I never had luck myself til I met her...I think I will always have a bit of luck to fall back on around me now because of her - almost 25 years marriage we might make it to November but I am not hopeful - I am understanding...

Thank you all for your support - I will be checking streams and the outlook of KSP - one of my all-time favorite SIMS <<< !

Commander Zeta

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Really sorry to hear this. I've been down the road you're traveling. I'll stress this to you: Never give up hope, ever.

Don't know what form of cancer your wife suffers from, but I would steer you to the Penn Med Abramson Cancer Center in Philly (UP). IMO, best place there is on the northeast coast, cutting edge... forget NYC (the horror stories I could tell you). Should you ever end up going to Abramson, please do PM me.

Best wishes to you and yours.

Ferret

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