Make a wish... and have it horribly corrupted!

[Red Iron Crown]

Granted. You begin lactating. Edit: Nuts, just realized I corrupted two of yours in a row, sorry.

I wish people weren't so negative.

[cantab]

Granted. One electron is removed from each atom in your body, which promptly explodes from the electrostatic repulsion.

I wish I wanted to desire seeking illuminating enlightenment.

[Tery215]

Granted. Your want of character to seek enlightenment was already in you. Suddenly a beam of light appears, and Spock smacks you in the face.

I wish for a box of deadly, deadly unstable isotopes.

[Starwhip]

Guys, it's not fun when wishes are already bad ideas.

Granted: You are then shoved into the box by a gang of hippies demanding world peace.

I wish for a chocolate chip cookie.

[cantab]

Granted. You get extraordinarily rendited to a CIA facility in somewherestan and interrogated as to how you came to acquire those isotopes.

Edit: God darn it. Umm...same thing, except it's about how you came to acquire cookies that actually contain weapons-grade uranium.

I wish to cut down a tree safely.

[Guest Fyre Flare]

3illuminati5me

[Lhathron the Elf]

Granted, but the tree was endangered and you get fined and sent to prison for the rest of Jebediah's life.

I wish for moar boosters.

[Overfloater]

Ganted: You receive moar separatrons! 8-D

I wish elephants were pink.

[Tery215]

so ninja'd

Granted. However, most of the albino elephants die from solar radiation.

I wish for a book.

[PhoenixBird0]

Granted: the book is a 5189 year long book about nothing and you are forced into a small room to read it.

I wish this thread wasn't this long.

[Lhathron the Elf]

Granted.

I wish for slenderman to be my pet.

[Mr_Brain]

Granted. He's not very well trained and bites you, killing you.

I wish that the aurora is visible from where I live, without any catastrophic changes to solar activity or Earth's magnetic field.

[Tery215]

Granted. The earth melts.

I wish for a new pair of socks.

[cantab]

Granted. But they were made by Dobby, and thus don't match.

I wish I could make my mind up.

[Guest]

granted. but you do not and your mind explodes.

I wish for the hogwarts express to fly and summon when i raise my hand at any given moment to take me to hogwarts,and i wish to be sorted into ravenclaw

[Sun]

Granted. Since I'm not a Harry Potter fan, I can't come up with a corruption.

I wish mud and my posts got less hate. By the way, I'm going to start WAY scaling down my mud content. But it won't be completely erased... probably.

[Tery215]

Granted. Mud is now thoughtlessly destroyed by the evil police.

I wish for a new car.

[Starwhip]

*poof*

Your new car is materializes directly above your head.

I wish for a single, palm-sized gold doubloon sitting motionless on the table before me.

[Sun]

Granted. It's over 100,000,000,000 degrees Celsius, so it melts your face off.

I wish North Korea was never turned into a communist dictatorship in 1948, or that it had never developed nukes or its military-first policy.

[temporalExile]

Granted. It instead turned into 5 million tons of highly radioactive materials, killing the entire population of earth.

I wish the for letter "E"

Edited November 12, 2014 by temporalExile

[Tangle]

Granted- Ä’

I wish for 8zip.

[Guest]

Granted. But 8zip hasnt come out yet so the company sues you for wishing for it.

I wish i could have a santa sled craft and give out to all the kerbals.

[General Rarity]

Granted, but KSP keeps crashing when you load it.

I wish for ammo for a Gatling Laser.

[Kinglet]

Granted. It's a few hundred years old. It's long leaked already and only has enough charge to charge your phone for 2%.

I wish for a safe, cuddly and unagressive living regulus regulus.

[Lhathron the Elf]

Granted. But then you wake up and realize it was a dream.

I wish for no one to touch the hair.