VelocityPolaris

Happy 4th of July! Assuming that you are British, I'm going to explain what the 4th of July holiday is. In shortest form, it's like Guy Fawkes day. The 4th of July is when the Americans launch a bunch of SRB's (fireworks, flares) into the air to watch stuff blow up. It's also supposed to represent a historical something-or-other, like a battle the U.S. lost but our national anthem pretends is a victory, or something revolutionary. Ah, EXPLOSIONS!

Ahhh, I'm talking to myself again aren't I? Hello? Anyone besides me here?

Attention please! I'm afraid I "Landed" the Predictably Damaged when it appeared too damaged to easily repair and I was too lazy to resupply. The crew is fine, but now the ship lived up to it's name. Anyway, as an excuse, the next chapter will take place far in the future. Comment if you have any suggestions for the next chapter

I hope you don't mind, but I modified the z_greenhouse from an unknown mod to produce food.

Matton... sounds like the name of a red shirt. Dunno why.

I... can... feel... the... awesome...

Have some of dat rep. Cheers to you, young sir.

Space Wars Episode III - Close encounters of the explodey kind We rejoin our heroes in a battlecruiser named ’KSS Predictably Damaged’, preparing the spacefaring warship for battle. At the moment, Jeb is outside, adding some struts. Jeb: okay, that looks like the last one. Bill: It had better be, there’s no more in the emergency compartment. Jeb: I can hardly believe someone forgot to check to make sure the armor was actually attached to the rest of the ship at more than one point. Bill: Yeah, someone down there is getting the old yelling. You can stay out a few more minutes to marvel at the planet if you want. Jeb: Okey dokey, I’ll do just that. There’s the ground, there’s my legs, and there’s a long way in between. Suddenly a light starts blinking on Bill’s console. Bill: oh no. Jeb! Get in now! Incoming vessel at 10 km and closing FAST! Estimated 18 seconds until closest approach! Jeb: I’m in, I’m in! What ship is it? Bill: Our little friend. He’s killed relative velocity and is hailing us. Jeb: This is Commander Jebediah Kerman of the experimental vessel Predictably Damaged, state your intention. Fighter Pilot: Lieutenant Lunard Kerman of this here swarm fighter. Surrender your vessel and prepare to be boarded. Jeb: You know I can’t do that, Lunard. Lunard: Then you’ll die. Only one of you has to buy my way down. Goodbye. Jeb: What does he mean by buy his way out? Bill: No heat shields or parachutes on that thing. And, he’s closing, 2km, 1.2, 1, he’s slowed to 1 m/s. He’s put powering up a missile. Jeb: There goes negotiation. Fire the bullets. Four footballs are fired from the cruiser at pathetically low speeds, all missing the fighter. Jeb: That went well. Bill: He’s firing! Full thrust! Jeb: It missed! Prepare a Torpedo! Bill: The recoil pushed him back a bit, but now he’s closing even more. Torpedo ready. Jeb: Fire! A cylinder detaches from the cruiser, takes aim, and heads right toward the fighter, which dodges it with an RCS burst. Jeb: A miss? Darn. Bill: He’s 600 meters and firing two more, brace- An explosion rocks the hull. Bill: uhnnn! Jeb: Oof! Bill: We survived... he hit... the armor. No serious damage. Jeb: firing another torpedo! Bill: an explosion! That’s a hit! Jeb: Crud, we only hit a solar panel! Bill: He’s firing again! *BOOM* Sparks fly everywhere as the room shakes and debris is spewed everywhere. Bill: Gaaah! Jeb: Ahhh! Bill: Unngh... Jeb: Erf! He hit the crew cabin square in the face, tiling is holding at thirty percent! Bill: ... Jeb: Bill? Crud. You are gonna pay for that, Lunard! Firing another torpedo! Jeb: Killing relative velocity. Just try to escape this one! In Lunard’s fighter... Lunard: Where’s your next torpedo? I saw it detach. Never you worry, I’ll find it- Oh Frak! *BOOM* Lunard: Arghhh! [FighterComputer]: warning, monopropellant tank breach. Hydrazine leaking at 10 units per second. Lunard: Frak, my RCS! Target their inner structure, computer! Back on the Predictably Damaged... Jeb: Bill, can you hear me? I need you here! Bill: unhhh... still here... commander... Jeb: Good to know. You’ll be fine, we just have to - crud, another missile. *BOOM* Jeb: Ack! Bill: ugh! Jeb: grmmf... port armor penetrated... He wrecked the ASAS, some debris destroyed a Torpedo. Firing another. Bill: urf... I’ll guide it in... dead lock achieved... he’s closing to 120 meters. Near point-blank range. Jeb: Fire! Back on Lunard’s ship... [FighterComputer]: Warning! Incoming torpedo on fatal trajec- *KABADOOSH!* Lunard: EARGH! Lunard: hull breach. Thanks for saving me, little suit. We’re out of ammo, the cabin’s wrecked, and we’re out of RCS with the tank destroyed. Computer, radio the Predictably Damaged... that I surrender. [FighterComputer]: Negative. Situation protocol calls for a collision course. Plotting. Lunard: WHAT!? A suicide ram!? Computer, override! [FighterComputer] Negative. Ramming trajectory plotted. Lunard: No! Let me out! [FighterComputer]: Negative. You signed the employee agreement form. Beginning burn. Lunard: But I didn’t read the fine print - aha, the hatch is open! [FighterComputer]: Collision immine- *KABOOM* Lunard: GAAAAAAAAHHHH!!! A few moments later. Lunard: Haha, I am ALIVE! Being nearly dead never felt so good! Let me just get my bearings, and... crud. 12 kilometers away!? Gah! And... nope, can’t slow down. Looks like I have to ask them to rescue me. About half a minute earlier, onboard the Predictably Damaged... *KABOOM* Bill: What was THAT? Jeb: Sounds like a bird hit the window! Bill: Nope, it was the fighter. Rammed us full tilt. Jeb: Frak! Damage report! Bill: Heh, it hit the armor. We lost a docking port. Jeb: Oooh, that was expensive. How about the fighter? Bill: Totally annihilated when it rammed us. I don’t think anything survived - wait, I’m getting a distress beacon from twenty kilometers away - what. It’s Lunard! Jeb: He must bailed, then the shockwave knocked him away. So do we rescue him? Bill: Yeah. He might have tried to kill us, but we can’t let a Kerbal in need die. Besides, we could use what he knows. Jeb: Alright. Burning towards the guy. Ima have to start turning right away, we’re down to secondary gyroscopes. Two minutes till closest approach. Bill: You could have warned me before burning! Mind if I take a look outside? Jeb: Sure. Make sure to take a picture, in case somebody at home thinks we’re dead. Bill: Righty ho. Just gimme a little to get this suit on. Jeb: Make sure only to decompress the airlock. Bill: Don’t worry, I’m out. Bill: Looking good, looking good. This thing is pretty much okay, Jeb! Jeb: Great. Now come back in so I can flip this around. About one minute later… Lunard: You… You actually came. To help. Jeb: And don't you forget it. Come on in to the back where we can keep an eye on you. Lunard: Thank you. Bill: Why didn't you just ask us for a ride home? Lunard: It's not our way to beg for mercy unless it's the only way to survive. Ahhh, fresh air. Jeb: Your's wasn't? Lunard: Nope, canned air, only would last me a few more hours, even in the fighter. Bill: Why would you work for a company that did things like that to you? Lunard: I failed to read the fine print in the employee agreement form. Jeb: Whoops. Anyway Bill, call KSC. We need repair, refuel, rearm, and find a way to get this guy down.

Space Wars Episode II - Enemy Fighter Inbound At least half an our after the previous chapter, we find our heroes in a big battlecruiser about to be launched into orbit, because Jeb would not have it any other way. In the mission control room Bobak: Coms check with Predictably Damaged. Commander? Jeb: Locked and loaded, Capcom. Bobak: Roger that. Pilot? Bill: That coconut cookie did not go down well, but otherwise I'm go for launch. Bobak: Flight, Predictably Damaged is go to resume countdown. Gene: Roger that. Alright everyone, give me a go/nogo for launch. Capcom? Bobak: We're go, flight. Gene: FDO? FDO: Go. Gene: Prop? Prop: Go. Gene: Science? Science: Go! Gene: Eecom? Eecom: No hurricanes yet, we're go flight. Gah, I hate my job. Gene: uh… P-com? P-com: Go. Gene: Janitor? Janitor: All clean! Gene: Righty ho, Predictably Damaged is go to resume countdown. Bobak: Copy that, we are T - 9:00 and counting. Science: Is all equipment safely stowed? Bobak: Commander, is all equipment safely stowed? Jeb: How should I know? Bobak: Uh… Commander says yes, all equipment is safely stowed. Science: Good to know. Bobak: So, you guys ready to go into space on this giant fireball? Jeb: YeeeHaaaaw! Bill: Ahh, my ears. A short time later… Prop: We are T-10. 9. 8. 7. 6. 5. Bill: It's rumbling! Is it supposed to be rumbling? Bobak: For the 47th time, yes, it's supposed to do that! Prop: 3. 2. 1. All engines running, and we- P-com: -Have liftoff, of the first orbital cruiser, which will hopefully not crash like it's namesake! Gene: Keep the comforting thoughts down to a minimum, would ya? P-com: (Sigh) Yes, Flight. Just a few minutes later. Jeb: We're in SPAAACE! Bobak: I can confirm, We have space. Bill: We're not in orbit yet, try not to enjoy yourself too much. Jeb: Meh, no such thing. ooh looky, Apoasis in 2 minutes 4 seconds. Bill: Roger, and… We have an anomaly. Anomaly in the Avionics bay, Capcom. Bobak: We see it Predictably Damaged. Standby, we're working on it right now. FDO: What's wrong? Bobak: AV bay anomaly. FDO: geep, why is it always the AV bay? This seems to happen every launch. Uh, did they try pressing the ACK button on their keyboards? Bobak: I'll ask them to try. Bobak: Uh, hey guys? Try hitting the ACK button. Bill: okay, but I don't see what that would do… and… It worked? Anomaly went away! Jeb: Out of curiosity Capcom, what exactly did hitting ACK do? Bobak: Tells the computer that it was a sensor failure. Oldest one in the book after the good old RUD. Jumping to after the orbital insertion. Bill: MECO imminent. Jeb: And… We survived the takeoff! Amazing! Bobak: We confirm. Good job orbiting this clunker, Predictably Damaged! Gene: And good job Mission Control, you guys all deserve a round of applause. Or better yet, drinks. Cola for everyone! Clapping can be heard in mission control as a delivery guy arrives with a wheelbarrow of cola bottles. Jeb: Sounds like they're having a party down there. Bill: What, without us? Anyway, better arm these things. Jeb: Ugh. Weapons in space make me sick… Bill: Me two, but it was a sensible idea putting this up here. Lots of room in this cabin! Amidst the drinking and cheering, one of the mission controllers glances at his panel. What he sees does not look good. Eecom: Uh, guys? *Random cheering and more drinking* Eecom: GUYS!!! Bobak: What? Eecom: There's an unidentified rocket launching from the western continent. One of the Geosats is getting footage. Prop: I see it. Looks almost exactly like a design from the Kerbin Aerospace Tech Exposition. Gene: Can you get us a picture? Prop: Of the design from the exposition, sure. Gene: That'll do. Put it up on the big screen. FDO: That looks like a space fighter for sure. P-com: Might have been dispatched against our cruiser! Gene: That does look ominously spiky. Capcom, warn Predictably Damaged… Warn them that an unidentified space fighter might try to attack them. Bobak: Right. And after that? Gene: We wait and see what happens. Bobak: I'm all over that.

Space Wars Episode I - KSS Predictably Damaged Bill and Jebediah Kerman are sitting in a crowded mess hall, trying to snack and talk at the same time. Bill: So, the reporter is out looking for wild kurdunkeds, he climbs up a hill, and what does he see? Jeb: Why are you asking me? You're the one telling the story! Bill: I dunno. Anyway, he sees a big smoke trail, looks up, and there's a freaking huge rocket going up, not eight KM from the wildlife refuge! Jeb: Whoa. I didn't know anyone else was doing launches. Bill: I know, right? So, anyway, he's a smart fella, and plugs up his ears pretty well, but the sound of it almost bowls the poor guy over! Manages to get a good look, and according to him that thing isn't using any parts he's ever seen, some sort of reactor, and some giant fairing! Wanted to take a picture, but he wasn't about to uncover his ears. You of all people know how a giant rocket sounds. Jeb: Yep I do. So what sort of rocket was it? Who launched it? Did we find out? Bill: He saw a pretty obvious logo on the side. Beehive aerospace. Of course, we called them up and asked them, but the HR guy there said that it was probably stuck there by some other company to direct the spotlight away from them. Besides, the launch center is a continent or two out of their jurisdiction. Old unclaimed Space Center, used to be used by Insular Aerospace. Can't remember who built it. As for the payload, nobody knows. One of our geosats detected a big ship on an escape trajectory, the same one, but the fairing was on. Still, based on the speed it was going at it had to be headed for one of the outer planets. Jeb: What about transfer windows? Bill: Ah, the guys at the astronomical society tried that, but there were windows for Dres, Jool, Duna, and Eeloo all there the time of launch! Freaking rare coincidence, and the only time we could use less transfer windows Jeb: That, was an awesome story. And this is an awesome chocolate bar. Hows your coconut cookie? Bill: All gone, and it was delicious. Oop, looks like the director is calling. Bill Kerman walks over to a blinking panel on the wall and presses it. Bill: What's up, Gene? Gene: You two are due to launch in an hour. We're sending up a prototype cruiser, so don't be late! Jeb: A cruiser! You mean, like an armed ship? Gene: Precisely. With all of this talk about unclaimed rockets and secret launches, we want to keep a guard dog in orbit. You'll be flying the 'KSS Predictably damaged' for orbital weapons testing. Bill: Predictably damaged? That sounds a little bit like a Space Shuttle that crashed some years back. Gene: Ran out of names. Well, there was the "Widow Maker', but that was just grim. Jeb: Do we have to wash our hands before we leave again? Gene: Yeah. It was that, or a check-up with Doctor Neillo. See you by the launch pad! A few minutes later, the crew are standing by a rather sleek looking cruiser, with structural panels surrounding the fuel tank and two extremely streamlined capsules. Jeb: Whoa. That is one awesome looking battlecruiser. Bill: Hold on. If i'm right, then these SpacePlanesPlus capsules. can hold four. Why isn't Bob coming? Gene: Still in recovery after the Dres mission. I can imagine it was rather traumatic to see the ground fall from under him. Jeb: And they said there was no seismic activity on Dres. Gene: Yeah, the seismometers on that mission even had that result! The Sciencers down in R&D are stilling scratching their heads about that. Your guess is as good as mine. Jeb: In that case, an evil space kraken ate some of the ground for snack. It was going to try to eat Bob too but he hadn't bathed since they left Kerbin. Gene: Heh heh, space kraken it is then. Bill: So what are the weapons on this? Gene: Glad you asked. It's got 4 bullets, and 8 guided torpedoes. Jeb: Are those footballs over there? Gene: er… Those are the bullets. Found a warehouse full of footballs, and for some reason 4 of them had decouplers on them. Jeb: Good to know. I like the SRB's, by the way. Gene: uh… me two? Bill: Guys, we should get to the launch before they decide to leave without us! Jeb: Righty ho. See you soon, Gene! Gene: Best of luck, if we can find some we haven't used! Bill: Comforting words, dear Geneney. Gene: …

Awesome chapter!

The Snack Time Space Program has been a leader in the peaceful exploration of space since Kerbalkind learned what the term "look up" meant. However, this may soon change as an evilly evil company decides that the Snack Time Space Program is unfit for the duty of exploring space and decides to take matters into their own hands. The result? A war that is not simply confined to Kerbin, but reaches beyond the thermopause to the depths of space. It is in times like these, that, when alien spacecraft are out on exploration of the galaxy and pass by this particular solar system, they look the other way and hope to find a less explosive civilization. Join me for an epic battle, with pictures this time, and the unwieldy promise that it will not simply complete one chapter then stop, the Space Wars!* *Space sold separately. *Wars! also sold separately.

Say... It just occurred to me that Duna would make a great place to play football. They might put a field there by the time Bill retires.

Woohoohoo! Franklin is ALIVE!!!

Just hope they remember to vacate the centrifuge first.

What happened to hawk 1?

I've only been there once, with a two module manned mission, and the service module used WAY too much fuel getting an encounter. We barely managed to slow down into orbit with what was left. Fortunately, I was using the Kethane mod, and had equipped the lander with sensors, drills, tanks and converters, and Bill and Addas managed to get home safely. After walking on Dres.

I don't know about Buzz. Maybe if they wack him again he'll be okay. AWESOME STORY

Enjoyed it!

Looks... Threw-together?

Awesome!!! I would say that I cannot wait, but since physics will not comply with my instant gratification needs, I will and can wait. Also, I have an idea for what could happen in the movie after the scene in the trailer, unless you have it all figured out already. I recommend the crew agrees to wait until KSC can send them a fuel tanker, so that they can go to Duna. Or, KSC launches m a tanker to Duna which will rendezvous with them once they are in Duna orbit.

Chapter II - and then came Jeb In the highlands of one of the most populous continents of Kerbin, (hint: the one the KSC is at) a long wooden hut resides. This is the oomlatt bar, where our two heroes had just sat down to lunch. Well, not entirely just. They were at least twenty minutes into a meal of Kird sandwiches, fried snaazner berries, and orange cola milkshakes. Well, Gene wanted Lemon, but it doesn't really matter. By then, only the soda-shakes remained. Gene: Hmmm. This is the best shake I've ever had! Wernher, we really should come here more often! Wernher: I must admit, these people make some tasty orange cola milkshakes. However, it wouldn't be proper once we have a workforce. Eating in front of them... it seems... piggish? Gene: No wonder you made a bad director for Insular Space Program. Not eating with your crew makes 'em think that you consider yourself to be too dignified... to lower yourself down to their level. You've got to associate with your Kerbals for them to trust you. Wernher: That is not how we ran things in Kazi Kermany. Gene: Yeah? Well, let me know how THAT ended up. Wernher: ... Gene: So, do I win or do I win? Wernher: ... Don't we have a phone call to make? Gene: Right you are. We'll call the airbase and ask them to get Jebediah Kerman on the line. Meanwhile, somewhere in the Eastern Badlands... An official-looking Kerbal in sat in a dusty wooden office, signing various paperwork with one hand and holding a cup of carbonated-caffeine-tea. (Kerbals have yet to come up with a better name for that beverage) He signed the final document and leaned back in his chair for a well-earned rest. About forty seconds later, the telephone rang. The tired official sighed, swigged down the rest of his carbonated-caffeine-tea, and picked it up. Werner (known to friends as wernher) von Kerman greeted him on the other end. Wernher: Hello, is this Pavlova air force base? Official: Hypothetically, if I said it wasn't, would you believe me and then go away? Wernher: No... Official: (sighs) Oh. Alright then, this is commander Kirlak in charge of Pavlova airforce base, how may I hurt you? (Now, some of you might know about a director Kirlak from Mekan1k's series. Let's just say that this is an alternative universe to Mekan1k's, where Kirlak is a depressed air force base commander. As for the name, I... ran out of original names?) Now, back to the story. CONSTRUCTION ZONE

Yay! Attention! I will start building the next part now!

Chapter I - square one On a grassy peninsula which all of you know of, two barely completed buildings stood. A stark white, blank, and newly built rectangle, the tallest building ever built on Kerbin stood. This was VAB, and it was soon to represent progress and opportunity, the workhorse not just of the space program but for all of Kerbin. The second structure was less noteworthy, a flat mound of concrete with a small tower to the side. It was the launch pad, and it was going to have to hear all of the burdens and terrible ideas the engineers came up with. Not two kilometers away, a much less noteworthy bench with two Kerbals existed. They seemed quite philosophical about the entire thing. Gene: back to square one again, eh? I just hope it doesn't turn into another white elephant. Wernher: this isn't just a start-over, Gene. We learned plenty of lessons during the Insular program, and we can use what we learned to make something that isn't just from scratch. Now we actually know what we're doing, and we're ready to explore the Kosmos. Gene: but there are still plenty of lessons that we haven't learned yet. Kerbals cannot prepare for everything, and our only hope is to stop whatever is happening before things go horribly wrong. Besides, how are you gonna get Kosmonauts for the program? Only a few survived Insular, and I doubt any of them wanna stick their heads into the fire again. I bet it was cold up there... Wernher: You're right, Gene. I'm thinking you could help in, like you said, stopping disasters before they happen. Gene: you want me to be a health inspector? Wernher: (sighs) No, I want you to be the ground control chief. I know it's quite a commitment, but that's the sort of work ethic we need here. Big commitments. Gene: ok, I will. What about the Kosmonauts? How are you going to convince them that they aren't just being asked to poke their heads into the fire again? Is there anyone else who we could hire? Wernher: what about Bill? He has the experience and the know-how, and he seems to always be able to get out of a tough situation alive. Gene: the Recco survivor? His last experience messed him up so much, if you even mention space he hides under a table. Or a desk. Or the bed. Nah, he's never going to want to ever have anything to do with space again. What about Jebediah? The test pilot? Wernher: (guffaw) a test pilot! You're joking! He would never be able to go without constant attention. Plus, he probably doesn't even know basic division! What makes you think he has the experience?! Gene: what do you mean, needs constant attention? Those airplane radios only work a fraction of the time, and flights can last hours. Besides, he worked with Kirrim, that special agent, to disable the ICBM depot in the eastern desert mountains. He had to know enough physics to jam the radio frequencies to fire the thing, and the gut to jump onto an armed missile and cut the wires under fire, and- Wernher: alright, you win! We'll call him this afternoon. But I still insist we ask that Bill fellow. Gene: fine with me, although don't blame Bill if he hangs up on you. How about we go get a meal first? It's past lunch-time. Wernher: my stomach agrees with your advice. Besides, I could use a orange cola milkshake to cool me down. The sooner I get attention, the sooner the next chapter will come out! Don't forget to comment, unless you want me to quit the series!

The Prologue The Velocity space program has a long, interesting, and occasionally comical history. This is the continuing story of all who have dreamed to see it develop, and what it is becoming. Sit down, relax, enjoy a jolly cup of tea unless you fear for spilling it on your electronics, and read their story.