[WIP][Cabana Corp. News] The "New Horizon" Initiative

[BananaDealer]

[starting "Message from the Chairman"]

Hello there! This is BananaDealer- CEO of Cabana Corp. Research & Development!

You may have been wondering "What happened to Cabana Corp.?", I know I sure have! Well, wonder no-more- the News Network (3.0-Gamma) is back online! Here you will be able to find the latest going-ons on-site at Cabana Corp's new and somewhat improved spacecraft-launching facilities. Namely- the "New Horizon" Initiative (not to be confused with the previous project- "New Horizons", that... that... ahem... ended)!

What is the "New Horzion" Initiative, you may ask? Well, it appears our solar system is not the only one! Crazy if you ask me, but as the eggheads back in the Research Department keep insisting- quite true! Yes, it seems our little tiny sun is not the only little tiny sun. No, apparently there are thousands of little tiny suns all around! Some of these little tiny suns are not even so little, or tiny! Woah, I know right?!

Anyway, our scientists have figured out that these other solar systems may have planets just like ours- green grass, blue waters- the works! In fact, they say there are several systems close by that are suitable for exploration. Well, when I say close by, I really mean several light-years'worth of distance, but hey...

In any case, as of earlier this week, Cabana Corp. Research & Development is dedicating all of it's resources and funding to reaching those new stars and exploring the heck out of anything we find there. Yes! We're gonna SCIENCE! like we've never SCIENCE!'d before! And in order to truly dedicate ourselves to this new task, I've had all of our previous research into conventional rocketry destroyed! *weird background microphone noise* WHAT?! You're telling me we needed that? Damn... Well, you're smart scientists- that's literally your job! What do I pay you for?! Go... Make some more research or something...

Ahem... Anywhooo... We'll be opening our archives of the "New Horizon" Initiative to the public, mainly as a giant publicity campaign (the Board of Directors has been insisting that we need more brand recognizability). You'll be able to find information on all our launches, missions and general happenings here, so check back regularly!

[End of message]

The Cabana Corporation

News Network

The "New Horizon" Initiative

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TBD

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As of: 30/10/201, 22:45PM BST

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To do:

--- Literally everything of worth.