Just For The Fun(KSP Jokes)Post Them Here

[djblackliquor]

Hello guys please post some jokes about ksp, something like::wink:

"One does not simply let jeb control a space station"

Okay I know thats not really funny xD but thats why Im asking you guys I need some jokes lets have some fun

Edited June 9, 2013 by Cykyrios
recapitalised the post

[Cykyrios]

"One does not simply post while in precision control mode" aka caps lock.

While this if of course the default binding, I would greatly appreciate it if you used proper capitalization of words, instead of all caps

[leax256]

"One does not simply return from Eve" -me like 30 sec before I even saw this thread.

[leax256]

"One does not simply post while in precision control mode" aka caps lock.

While this if of course the default binding, I would greatly appreciate it if you used proper capitalization of words, instead of all caps

actually caps lock only toggles the precison mode.

[LeonG17]

One does not simply add more boosters.

[SoldierHair]

Oh , but you simply do.

[Luna Lovecraft]

Gandalf is actually an Easter Egg within the game.

He has issues with jet engines, and when you get high enough he repeatedly yells "You cannot pass!" at you until you both fall to your death.

[Rage097]

One does not simply go to Eeloo.

[NeoMorph]

How do you tell when a Kerbal is getting spacesick if they are NORMALLY green in the face?

[LeonG17]

Oh , but you simply do.

Oh, but not with more struts! Less you explode the KSC.

[superecnate]

One does not simply escape Kerbol.

'Eeloo there, Gov'na!

Luckily, the Kerbal solar system is on a diet, it doesn't need an asteroid belt!

I'd tell you a joke about Eeloo, but it would be too cool.

[RogueMason]

One does not simply go to Eeloo.

Eeloo, Eeloo, Eeloo there! I beg to differ:

http://forum.kerbalspaceprogram.com/showthread.php/24533-Show-off-your-awesome-KSP-pictures%21?p=435454#post435454

However, reaching Eeloo isn't my Crowning Jool, but it was a bit of an Ike to get there!

Ok, ok, I'm leaving, have a nice Eve-ning...

[Piv]

*Crashes rocket*

Well that ending was

(•_•)

( •_•)>âŒÂâ– -â– 

(âŒÂâ– _â– )

smashing. YEEEEAAAAAAAA

[Sapphire]

However, reaching Eeloo isn't my Crowning Jool, but it was a bit of an Ike to get there!

Ok, ok, I'm leaving, have a nice Eve-ning...

Okay, I'm laughing so hard right now.

I just know there's a potential "you momma so fat" joke involving Jool, but I can't think of one.

[Dombi]

How about yo momma is so fat that the devs are thinking of including her in the next update as a new planet.

[Vade]

Hello guys please post some jokes about ksp, something like::wink:

"One does not simply let jeb control a space station"

Okay I know thats not really funny xD but thats why Im asking you guys I need some jokes lets have some fun

One cannot simply describe my hatred of memes and the people that like them

[djblackliquor]

what exactly do you mean by that?

[The Jedi Master]

One does not simply go to Jool.

[Sarge82nd]

If you got speed problems I feel bad for you son, I got 99 boosters all on stage 1

[rryy]

What do you call the Kerbal that exploded?

KER-BOOM!

[Voidryder]

Three Kerbals walk into a bar. They order three whiskeys with beer chasers. They throw back their shots and then chug their beers. Neither of them says a word but all three tap the bar for the bartender to set them up with another round. He does and again they throw back their shots and chug their beers.

Again they don't say a word and just tap the bar in front of them to signal another round.

The bartender fixes them with an eye and brings them their drinks. Again they throw back their whiskeys and beers in record time. And still not one of them has said a word. They tap the bar again.

This goes on for over two hours. Then signalling the bartender with waves of their hands, they leave just as silently as they had come in.

One of the bar's regulars who had watched this masterful display of drinkmanship, wanders over to the bartender and says, "what was that all about?"

The bartender wiping down the bar with a towel says, "It's final exams for flight school today."

"Jumpin Jimmy," the regular says, "you mean those guys are gonna go fly after drinking all that whiskey and beer?"

The bartender flips the towel over his shoulder and says, "No, you dope. That was the final exam. They're full full fledged pilots now."

Edited June 13, 2013 by Voidryder
typo

[djblackliquor]

Three Kerbals walk into a bar. They order three whiskeys with beer chasers. They throw back their shots and then chug their beers. Neither of them says a word but all three tap the bar for the bartender to set them up with another round. He does and again they throw back their shots and chug their beers.

Again they don't say a word and just tap the bar in front of them to signal another round.

The bartender fixes them with an eye and brings them their drinks. Again they throw back their whiskeys and beers in record time. And still not one of them has said a word. They tap the bar again.

This goes on for over two hours. Then signalling the bartender with waves of their hands, they leave just as silently as they had come in.

One of the bar's regulars who had watched this masterful display of drinkmanship, wanders over to the bartender and says, "what was that all about?"

The bartender wiping down the bar with a towel says, "It's final exams for flight school today."

"Jumpin Jimmy," the regular says, "you mean those guys are gonna go fly after drinking all that whiskey and beer?"

The bartender flips the towel over his shoulder and says, "No, you dope. That was the final exam. They're full full fledged pilots now."

Really nice xD

[Voidryder]

Bill Kerman slowly wakes up in KSC’s hospital. He is wrapped head to toe in bandages with both legs and arms in traction.

Sitting by his bed are his brothers Bob and Jeb. Bob’s face clearly shows the worry and stress over Bill’s condition.

Jeb, in his trademark sunglasses is intensely slurping a huge soda through a straw while flipping through an Aviation Weekly magazine.

“Wha...what happened?†Bill croaks softly.

Bob fidgets uncomfortably in his chair, casting covert looks in Jeb’s direction.

“Jebediah,†Bill rising up as far as he can and fixing his brother with a stern stare says, “what happened?â€Â

Jeb sighs and slowly closes the magazine and takes one last slurp before saying, “Auto-guidance was taking us directly into a football field size carter full of boulders the sizes of houses. I had to go to manual. The landing got hairy and we crashed. Hey, we’re luckily to be alive, Brother mine.â€Â

Bill looks at Jebediah in stunned silence. Bob looks rapidly between his brothers. He had no idea a Kerbal could turn the current color of Bill’s face.

Slowly through clinched teeth Bill says, “Jebediah, we were in the simulator.â€Â

[DerekL1963]

Hello guys please post some jokes about ksp, something like::wink:

"One does not simply let jeb control a space station"

Okay I know thats not really funny xD but thats why Im asking you guys I need some jokes lets have some fun

Memes != jokes.

[Lazro]

When is Kerbal independence day?

Nobody can tell, so many explosions that it drowns out the fireworks.