Kerbal History

[Wahgineer]

3132: The Kerbals reattempt the earlier experiment, this time using more thermonuclear weapons. They also pile dirt, garbage, and rocks on top of them (several thousand tons), and again detonate the weapons in a volcano. The debris piled on top of the weapons, combined with the ash and gas kicked up by several erupting volcanoes, creates a greenhouse affect that will increase the temperature enough to melt 70% of the ice, and keep it that way until Kerbol spools up to previous levels of activity. Farms and cities begin to be rebuilt. Kerbals begin to leave their underground cities.

[cziken20]

3135: AFTER some explorationKerbals find out that world is MOSTLYcovered in STILL lava.

Edited February 25, 2014 by cziken20

[problemecium]

3136: Deathbeam Kerman invents a rocket engine powered by lava.

[victory143]

Year 3137: The lava is processed and is found to contain several new elements. Wernerium is found to be unstable and radioactive. Kuropium is very light and extremely strong. Kinolum is very heat resistant and durable. Kupium is very abundant and fairly cheap. Koschfram is super dense and brittle. Kadmium is light and soft, like dough. Also Kadmium seems to combust fairly well. Kintolium is a flammable liquid. Kuran is a light, non-flammable gas which can be fused easily at 700 C with a high amount of pressure.

[Designer225]

Year 3150: It turns out Kuran when combined with Calcium (or Kalcium, rather) forms Calcium Kuranide (Ca⁺²Ku^-2), which is soluble in water. It is also edible and healthy. Kerbals began to mass-produce Calcium Kuranide.

[cziken20]

3151: Ca+2Ku-2 is found to be reacting with Kethane (C2H5O2C3H2O2IO(Kethane is a natural Kerbal blood)(such a nice one isn't it?)) and making Kertulium (a new element), which affects Kerbal's white blood kells and making them very vulnerable, and unable to fight viruses and bacteries. That "illnes" is called KIV. Kerbals don't know to eat it or not, because it's making skin, hair, bones, nails etc. more healthy, but makes you die of Kneezing.

Edited February 25, 2014 by cziken20

[Wahgineer]

3153: The Lava has more or less completely drained back down into the mantle: it turns out that the explosions had caused some lava pools to form around only a few bunkers, which had coincidentally been built near hotspots to allow for geothermal power generation.

@ciziken20: did you not notice when I said they started to rebuild their farms and cities? that would imply that the world wasn't covered in lava.

[cziken20]

3153: The Lava has more or less completely drained back down into the mantle: it turns out that the explosions had caused some lava pools to form around only a few bunkers, which had coincidentally been built near hotspots to allow for geothermal power generation.

@ciziken20: did you not notice when I said they started to rebuild their farms and cities? that would imply that the world wasn't covered in lava.

Everyone don't know what i mean... I meant the world MOSTLY (Kerbals probably gone on surface in the places were there was no lava) covered in lava, and i meant for the lava to be a still one. You know - basalt, i made a small mistake not saying this . Sorry.

I also edited my post - do you feel happy? Of course there were liquid lava pools, but i... I think i broke it.

Edited February 25, 2014 by cziken20

[Wahgineer]

Everyone don't know what i mean... I meant the world MOSTLY (Kerbals probably gone on surface in the places were there was no lava) covered in lava, and i meant for the lava to be a still one. You know - basalt, i made a small mistake not saying this . Sorry.

I also edited my post - do you feel happy?

All is forgiven. We're just people, after all.

3155: The ice has more or less shrunk back to it's normal size. Kerbals continue rebuilding their cities, towns, and villages.

3160: Object #088 is taken out of deep storage. It is fitted with a radio controlled driving system, and it's tiny fusion reactor, which has been duplicated into blueprints, is loaded with water. The car starts and accelerates. Once it reaches 88 mph, it is engulfed in blue lightning bolts. The car emits three bright flashes accompanied by three loud bangs, before vanishing into thin air, leaving nothing but twin fire trails to mark it's passing.

[cziken20]

3161: Kerbals use the most powerful telscope ever to discover how Sun surface looks, some small dark dot is found but it's moving in rather too fast way. It is found it is a monlit, the same as on Mun, Duna, Dres, everywhere in Kerbin System. It is added to anomalies as Anomaly#231, after that an anomaly#232 i also added, because a small teapot is found to be orbiting that monolit.

[problemecium]

3161: Kerbals attempt to sculpt their own monolith out of Kuropium. It's a disaster, and one of them later claims to have been told by the monolith that he was named after a tall pink alien who lives in a higher-dimensional space where Kerbals are part of a computer simulation. None of the others believe this rubbish.

[victory143]

Year 3170: Kerbals re-populate the ruins of the Great Munar Valley. Advanced terraforming technology is uncovered and a stockpile of liquid-fuel rock guns are found. Mining begins as Kerbals find that Mun dust reacts weirdly to Oxygen and suspect there are new elements. Also, guns are upgraded to use Kadmium charges to fire a cylinder made of a Koschfram and Kupium alloy. The results are outstanding and the 'Kad-Rifle' is put into mass-production for the Armed Forces and the ICD (interplanetary combat division).

Edited February 25, 2014 by victory143

[Designer225]

Alright, no Kerbalized names for elements already known to humans. So Kuropium = Europium, Kadmium = Cadmium, Kalcium = Calcium, Karbon = Carbon, etc.

Year 3175: It turns out Cadmium (Kadmium) is more likely to combine with Oxygen than not (thus forming Cadmium Oxide, or Cd⁺²O^-2), and as a result many bullets turned to stones that are useless to work with. Kerbals began to turn to Lead (Pb) and laser to create more advanced weapons. Lead work best with gold, which keeps the bullets from rusting and also allow up to 1000 bullets per shot fired launched; while laser creates a very deadly weapon so far: The Laserator (fires up to 100 "bullets" before recharging).

[andrew123]

Post monolith incident report, filed by the Office of Naval Intelligence Section 2 on Jool station Beta. The dominant government at this point is the United Kerbal Space Command, which is desperate to rediscover the mystically legendary kraken ftl jump drive.

OFFICE OF NAVAL INTELLIGENCE/SECTION 2

EYES ONLY REPORT - A340021

0821 HOURS, AUGUST 12, 3192

CLASSIFIED TOP-SECRET

COMM-SCRIBED/PTS 9386-9

00834-19223-HS//ADM PARANGOSKY, MARGRET OLIANDA

00230-00923-MP//VADM STANFORTH, HIRONYMOUS MICHAEL

Year 3182: As resources on Kerbin shrank, Kerbal kind became desperate enough to turn to mega corporations to fund Jool Station Alpha to mine for much needed helium 3 in their fusion power experiments and other fusion research. The newly opened station was taken over by Kerbal rebels calling themselves Friedens, based on the planet Duna. Captain Cole Jebediah, an ancestor of renown astronaut Jebediah Kerman, successfully boarded the station and singlehandedly defeated the rebels, albeit indirectly, by deorbiting the station into the gas giant Jool, costing his own life, and was posthumously awarded the Medal of Honor for recognition.

(Your?)Wait Signal Trap-10Cond. Wait-1244(Your?)Wait Relative(MP,MAP,NP?)-47Supercondition-236Supercondition-Data-144SIERRA499 LOC LINK 0x2F276388

- P

Edited February 26, 2014 by andrew123

[Wahgineer]

3183: A trans dimensional wormhole opens, and a tall, humanoid person steps through. He is twice as tall as an average Kerbal, has pale flesh which has been tanned by the sun, is composed entirely of blocks, and hails to be from the land of Minecraftia. Binary code is seen emitting from the portal, which seems to lend some truth to the "Our universe is a simulation in a computer" theory. The Military barricades the portal, questions the Minecraftian, and then orders him to leave. The portal is then blown up, sealing the universes off form each other. The encounter is labeled as classified.

[Designer225]

3188: Jeb appears in the KSP. He might've been time-traveled to here before the station falls.

[Pockrtplanesairways]

3189: Jeb saves billions of kerbals by defeating the Deep Space Kraken once again, throwing it's carcass into Jool where the Kraken obliterates itself. Deep Atmospheric Kraken still at large. Thought to be on Eve or Laythe.

[problemecium]

3190: Kerbalkind is terrorized by the arrival of the Deep Land Kraken.

3191: Kerbals, in a desperate effort to defend their cities from the Deep Land Kraken, pool their resources to build giant robots the size of the Kraken. The robots are known as "Kaegers."

[cziken20]

3192: Onlu KSA and Kurope built Kaegers, but Krussia also suffers DLK so it built "Kratimov" It is a bit bigger than Kempire Kate Kuiling. Kerbals after build hard defences start to don't know what to do with too many robots. Some think they are going to declare war against each other.

[Wahgineer]

3200: after the land kraken is defeated, the kaejers are disassembled, and the sea walls are torn down. Kerbals resume their space fairing activities.

[problemecium]

3201: Despite having invented the warp drive centuries ago, the Kerbals only just now are visited by the Vulcans and offered membership in the Federation - it was hard to find them given how tiny their solar system was.

3202: After a full year of deliberation by Kerbal heads of state, the Vulcans get bored and leave. The jury is still out on whether Kerbalkind will accept their invitation.

3202.81257345923459: A sect of mystics rises to power who base their belief system on an invisible energy field called "The Korce". They claim it enables them to blow things up with their minds.

[andrew123]

3204: Not long after the emergence of so called jedis, a new breed of mystics rise to power. Called psykers, they are received with open arms by the rest of the progressive kerbal society, which has now expanded to include millions of planets colonized through harnessing the power of the warp kraken. A new breed of working automatons are also unveiled and are called the Kerbals of Iron, and are also built across the galaxy after Kerbals and their STC artificial intelligences receive the blueprints.

Edited February 28, 2014 by andrew123

[Pockrtplanesairways]

3255: Jeb finds Deep Atmospheric Kraken on Moho for some reason. Cannot defeat but makes a plea bargain and Eve is now the DAK's.

[problemecium]

3256: Eve is taken over by the Kandemic Legion, Kand of Brothers, and Koonswarm. Any Kerbal who goes there without a cloaking device is now doomed to be ganked.

[cziken20]

3260: A new religion develops in kerbal world. It is called Ikeitanity. They believe that Ike is a dead kod and needs lots of praying to make him awake, and than all kerbals shall go to Kreat Klace of Kods. (kkk)