Kerbal History

[problemecium]

3815: After decades of neglect, KLAD-KS breaks down. As far as anyone can tell, this is the end of Kerberture Laboratories.

3815: A few radical scientists postulate that Wolffy never in fact exploded. The evidence they cite is that A: it still appears to be there, and B: it suddenly started moving very fast. Their hypothesis is that Wolffy had an unseen binary companion, possibly a black hole, that emitted the nova-like flash after accreting large amounts of gas from Wolffy's atmosphere. The force from the explosion pushed Wolffy away and likely pushed significant quantities of radioactive material toward the Kerbol system.

3815.5: Despite scarce funding, the Wolffy Binary Supporters start a krowdfunded project to save Kerbin from the inevitable radiation blast. Their initial plan is to slowly irradiate all Kerbals until they develop an immunity to cosmic rays.

[Designer225]

3819: It turns out the material released aren't radioactive - they are in fact hydrogen and helium gas released. The krowdfunding project continues, however.

3820: The cloud isn't moving anymore - it is beginning to move away.

[victory143]

Year 3840: The Kau go to Wolffy. It survives! The Kau race celebrated and colonised the two planets in orbit. However, the fact that the star has had some of it's mass taken away by the Black hole means that the planets orbits have changed and their surfaces have been pulled apart, creating massive gorges. On the plus side, it has exposed lots of Kuipium and Kuropium ores. Also, the planets are littered with Koschfram and Kadmium ore deposits. The Kau exploit this.

Year 3890: Kuran Fusion is perfected, and the price of Kuran gas soars up. Kuran is found at the North-Kerbin Polar Islands. There are disputes over who owns it.

Edited March 4, 2014 by victory143

[Wahgineer]

3895: A large starship is seen bursting up out of the ocean. It quickly departs into space and vanishes.

3900:Kerbals commemorate the 3,900th year of their existence as a race by building a new megalopolis on the ocean surface inside of the giant crater.

[cziken20]

3910: A very new chemical element is found and called Korichicinium (Kch), despite it's high number in keriodic table it's completely not-radiactive. It is very useful, as it is the most efficient element discovered to produce energy. It is even better than antimatter. It has 110% efficiency, and some physcicists just don't believe it. How could it create more energy than it has, or it is given to it? Despite the fact- it is still very useful. But one thing is important- it is veeeeery rare. More rare than our Actinium (rarest metal on earth). However large (not really large, but large for numbers of Korichicinium) deposit is found on the most unwanted and boring place in Kerbol system. On Gilly. Some companies are now fighting to get this.

[problemecium]

3912: Anti-government protesters start blaming the Kerbal governments for irradiating Kerbals and causing them to all turn green. Government employees claim that Kerbals have always been green, but the protesters won't listen.

[Wahgineer]

3915: The new chemical was found to be a nothing more than a glitch in some research equipment. It is removed, and Anti-matter retains its place as the most energetic form of matter.

[victory143]

*Cough* Anti *Cough* Matter is *Cough* not *Cough* matter!

Year 3980: The Kau begin the Third Expansion Crusade. The take Vall, Bop, Eeloo and Moho. Eve is covered in blue oceans and high clouds similar to Kerbin. The atmosphere is the same too. The Kau use their Gargantuan Wolffy Class capital ship, the Pride of Wolffy and the Kerbol Class Frigate, Tylo's Guardian to spearhead the the attack on Eve and it's moon Gilly. With help from the Kau in the Wolffy system, they are unstoppable. 30,000 Fighters, 70,000 Warships, 130,000 troopships and 240 Elite Command Ships. All the soldiers have Accelerator Carbines and Quantum Armour with built in Rocket-packs. There are 12 million soldiers and 390,678 tanks. Also, the Kau brought along 450,000 Accelerator-Cannon equipped SSTO's.

Edited March 6, 2014 by victory143

[Designer225]

Year 3981: When the Kau began their check before the invasion, only 2 million soldiers and no tanks are in the hangars. The rest are apparently lost while sungrazing through Kerbol. The Kau were surprised and began to retreat. More minuteships (Kerbal ships ready in just 60 seconds) came to damage the once unstoppable fleet. A scout party, meanwhile, was sent to recover the lost ships.

Year 3981.1: The same month, the Kau began to reconsider their plans of "aerobraking" (or "heliobraking", rather).

[cziken20]

Sorry for you all... but didn't the Kau and Kerbals form an alliance? Or did i miss something?

[Wahgineer]

Sorry for you all... but didn't the Kau and Kerbals form an alliance? Or did i miss something?

why do you think i tried the whole "universe.sys is not responding. please reboot."?

3982: **** happens

[victory143]

Kau Backstabbed the Kerbals.

Year 3985: The entire Kau fleet suddenly disappears. The Kerbal's not knowing this fire at each other thinking that the Kau are still there.

[Designer225]

Year 3983.1: ... until when they reorganize. then they packed up and retook others and prepared for further colonization. Although no one knew it, the Kau were gone.

Year 3984: 2nd transmission from the FTL mission.

[cziken20]

3985: Kerbals find out that there is another planet in Kerbol system. It's the size of Moho, although it wasn't seen before because it' completely pitch black. It looked just like another piece of space. They send a probe here and find out it has an atmosphere consisting of only noble gases. 35,2 % Argon, 12,5 % Neon, 22,34 % Krypton and 29.96 % Xenon. Some start thinking it would be fun to run some kelctricity through those and watch disco effects. Some think it is very useful, as Xenon is used in ion devices.

Edit: Ah- forgot, it's placed behing Eeloo's orbit. And they also called it "Hyguen".

Edited March 8, 2014 by cziken20

[Designer225]

3986: The Cassini-Hyguen mission is launched toward Hyguen (some mistakenly pronounced it "Huygen").

[problemecium]

3986.6: The Kraken and Kmaug enter a romantic relationship.

3987.4: The Kraken gives birth to a terrifying aberration of Nature: The Smacken. It's a giant invisible dragon in space, and where the Kraken would grab ships and tear them apart, the Smacken simply slaps them so hard they go splattering all over the cosmos. It attacks with absolutely no warning at all and becomes the principal obstacle to further space exploration.

3990: The Smacken attacks the Hyguen probe, splattering ship parts all over the Kerbolar system. Some of them manage to enter Hyguen's atmosphere, where they leave glowing plasma trails in every color except green. Many Kerbals see this as a bad omen.

[Wahgineer]

3400: The kerbals decide to charge up a warp drive deep in a gravity well. This attracts the smacken, which smacks the warp drive. This causes it to destabilize and explode, the resulting warping of space time destroys the Smacken. The Kmaug, in ablind fit of rage, attempts to attack kerbin. It burns up in the atmosphere, killing itself. Space exploration resumes.

3401: A new Cassini-Hyugen mission is restarted, and a new probe is built.

[cziken20]

(I completely din't mispell Huygen, it just a Kerbal mash-up, and if you want to know how to spell this it is hi-gwen, in case you didn't know how to spell this)

3403: Cassini-Hyguen 2 fianlly reaches it's destination and sends a small probe that will land. The planet's gravity of half a Gee is perfect for landing in it's estimated pressure, not like on Duna or Eve (600 m/s 1000 m above the ground, and 2 m/s 2000 m above ground, i just don't like those two planets), it starts descending in atmosphere wich isn't as estimated and gets to 120000 m, that isn't a good sign first. Then it hits lower atmosphere, where it starts burning and some guy in KSC clicks a button to activate small Uranium reactors and electrify the gases. A beautiful almost-rainbow streak goes after the ship (and i just realised that it would completely beautiful over a pitch black planet) The it gets to place where parachutes start working. Then it lands. The first probe wasn't really equiped and had only gas chromatographer. It drills into planet and finds out it is created out of 1.2 % coal (where did it come from?), 68.8 % of copper dioxide,and 30% unkown chemical. It inspects surface pressure and gets data that it is just above 0.8 atm. Gravity is 0.512 G. Then it checks it seismic activity and sees that is completely not active on surface- not even a tick, and very active in it's core. The main Cassini-Hyguen probe measures the magentational field and surprisingly it' almost as high as Jool's. There is a small moon- really small only 4 km with probably 0.0005 G gravity. Radius of Hyguen is also measured and is exactly 300 km. Some scientist start facepalming because now they see how much the first probe wasn't equiped well. Also a veeery small ring is seen around the planet. The CH (cassini-hyguen) tries to catch the small moon which has already been called and it is "MV-1" a better name is pending. It is really hard to get into orbit as SOI is 65000 m above and it has also 30 deegree inlined orbit making it into Kuiness Record as the most inclined body in Kerbol system. Then it's left to get to dark side and see if anything is other here. Just because for no real reason it's tidally locked to Kerbol.

[problemecium]

3404: Incensed about its entire family being killed, the Kraken destroys Kerbal Space Center, and to commemorate its vengeance it plants a giant flag with a picture of the Smacken on it. With the tracking station destroyed, Kerbals lose contact with the Hyguen probe.

3405: Kerbals begin constructing a new space center, starting with the Tracking Station. Unfortunately they forgot to hook up the power lines, and the entire place is pitch black inside.

3405.1: Judah Kerman lights a sepratron on fire, and instead of burning for a few seconds it stays lit for eight days, allowing construction of the new Tracking Station to continue. The new holiday of "Kerballukah" is created to celebrate this miracle.

[cziken20]

3408: Kerbals completely rebuild the Space Center. They contact the Hyguen mission and try to get more information. They finally somehow call the small moon and call it "Irony". Some find this name strange, as there is completely no iron in surface of this moon, and it doesn't make any irony. It's also found to have very high as for it's size magnetic field. The field is so high it actually distratcs somehow magnetic field of Hyguen. They try to figure out what causes it and come up witha theory that it's core is super-hot. Maybe even a bit boiling?

[Designer225]

3409: it turns out the moon is an asteroid that struck the planet Hyugen (some Kerbals still pronounced it Huygen). It was spectacular.

[cziken20]

You mean- it struck Hyguen and then cam into orbit after lithobreaking? And everybody is pronounicing it wrong Huygen, Hyguen, Hyugen. (Hguyen?)

It's Hyguen.

3410:Kerbals plan creating a colony on Hyguen. It would be very nice to live there because of reusable and cheap fireworks . Some rich kerbal movie companies think of creating a movie there. And KSC anounces they are going to send a vehicle that will mine deep into ground to see vwere did the coal probably cam from.

Coal is a product of a long process of fossiling T.R.E.E.S (those are the great trees found in some parts of the world, we can see them in game ) and some other plants. So where did it come from in probably-not-organic environment?

[victory143]

Year 3420: the Hyguen probe finds G.E.R.Ms on the surface of the planet!

[problemecium]

3421: After intensive review of magnetometric data from the probe, Kerbal scientists come up with a hypothesis that Hgueygueygn's moon contains a giant magnet. As to who put it there, nobody has any ideas.

[Designer225]

3422: The world leaders talked as more mispronunciations of "Hyguen" (Either Huygen, Hyugen, etc.) occurred everywhere in the Kerbol system.