AAR kalixy quest ( MASSIVE UPDATE)

[Dreadthrone]

https://ca.images.search.yahoo.com/images/view;_ylt=A2KI9kE8P6VTQz0A877tFAx.;_ylu=X3oDMTIyZ2o5ajRxBHNlYwNzcgRzbGsDaW1nBG9pZANlZDc2ZTI1YmNlYmEwZTdmYjExZTBjMDRmNzczMGFmMARncG9zAzkEaXQDYmluZw--?back=http%3A%2F%2Fca.images.search.yahoo.com%2Fsearch%2Fimages%3Fp%3Dpug%2Bfail%2Bgifs%26n%3D60%26ei%3Dutf-8%26y%3DSearch%26fr%3Dhp-ddc-bd-tab%26fr2%3Dsb-top%26tab%3Dorganic%26ri%3D9&w=312&h=255&imgurl=gifs.gifbin.com%2F032012%2F1332955728_pug_in_the_toilet.gif&rurl=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.gifbin.com%2F986529&size=3537.0KB&name=%3Cb%3Epug+%3C%2Fb%3Ein+the+toilet&p=pug+fail+gifs&oid=ed76e25bceba0e7fb11e0c04f7730af0&fr2=sb-top&fr=hp-ddc-bd-tab&tt=%3Cb%3Epug+%3C%2Fb%3Ein+the+toilet&b=0∋=240&no=9&ts=&tab=organic&sigr=10s88u9cu&sigb=143g32le8&sigi=11ne12eit&sigt=10orqfut6&sign=10orqfut6&.crumb=p2dYhkJcr2l&fr=hp-ddc-bd-tab&fr2=sb-top

WARNING THIS IS AN EXTREME W.I.P

NOTE the name was going to be kerbquest but then i found a mod with the same name..

CHAPTER ONE

yep is the name of the chapter!

jeb: when am i going strait into a space time anomaly?

mission control: after we do some outlandish shenanigans to launch a warp thing....

jeb:

mission control: unless YOU want to hop into a highly suicidal non tested massive psycho spacecraft of doom.....

jeb: YEAH

bob: embarrassing

mission control: you will need to fly a not tested war plane

five minutes later

jeb: this looks normal enough

jeb: OH DON'T TELL ME I WILL BE SITTING UPSIDE DOWN

mission control: ( chuckles)

jeb: you have got to be kidding me

jeb: well i have to do this to go into a space-time anomaly

jeb: brakes disengaged

jeb: engines activated

jeb: everything is normal and boring so far

jeb: WOW take off already!

Jeb: retracting landing gear

jeb: WOW SEVEN SECONDS AFTER ENGINE ACTIVATION AND IM ALREADY GOING CRAZY FAST!

Jeb: mission control we have a problem!

Mission control: what?

Jeb: im not finding this boring!

( Mission control makes bets about weather or not the world is going to explode

jeb: firing cannons to test weapon capacity...

jeb: WHOA the recoil!

Mission control: that’s were bobs cookies went!

Jeb: uhhhhh

bob: DON'T STEAL MY COOKIES!!!!!1111!!!

jeb: 300mps achieved

jeb: testing barrel role

ai: DO DO DO DO A BARREL ROLE BARREL ROLE BARREL ROLE DO DO DO DO A BARREL ROLL BARREL ROLE

jeb: TURN IT OFF BEFORE I CRASH THIS THING!!!!111

mission control: yeah that thing.... we installed it because we knew you would crash the thing if not prompted to barrel roll it will turn offwhen you do one but for now..... DO DO A BARREL ROLL

jeb: ok barrel roll started...

jeb: the plane almost looks proper like this....

BOOM!

Jeb: gun broken! MASSIVE side slip!

Ai: fix by doing DO DO A BARR

jeb flips a switch

ai: dew dOO00oo a beeril rell wheeeeew

jeb: YAY its off 0v0

mission control: quick before you destroy the thing return to base and land....

jeb: FINE!

Jeb: the other gun just exploded....seems like the gs from turning are ripping the thing like a lemon...

mission control: TURN AROUND

jeb: ohh MASSIVE SPEED ANOMALY 300 400500 OMG THIS IS FAST!

Jeb: deactivating engines for more torque..

jeb: OMG SLIGHT RE ENTRY EFFECTS!!

jeb: altitude dropping... gaining torque and turning

jeb: turn success lowering for landing...

jeb: ohhhh cookies!

Mean while in ksc....

bob: where are my cookies???

back in the plane.....

jeb a few kilometers out

five minutes later.....

jeb: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

bubxl5k: total distance from start....seventy kilometers.... current distance... sixty kilometers....

bubxl5k: close to surface speed 185 mps

bubxl5k: images of anomaly incoming...

bubxl5k: disabling engines

five minutes later ( AGAIN)

jeb: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

bubxl5k: jeb we are within ten kilometers of the runway please get up!

Jeb: zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

bubxl5k: ok DO DO A BARREL ROLL BARRELROLL

jeb: AHHHHHHHHHH SPARE ME!!!

bubxl5k: had to wake you up somehow....

jeb: i just had a nightmare that i was in some kind of warplane that has an upside down cabin and had blownoff two guns while turning....

bubxl5k: .......

jeb: oh i am in that plane... DAMMIT!

Bubxl5k: deactivating engines entering glide....

jeb: let me control this thing!

Bubxl5k: access granted.

Jeb: ok going higher...

jeb: clear view of runway....landing...

bubxl5k: PROXIMETY ALERT CONTROL ALERT WARNING PULL UP

POOSH

five hours later...

jeb: ........

bob: my cookies!

Hope you enjoyed this chapter... more to come!

Edited June 22, 2014 by Dreadthrone
update

[Dreadthrone]

fixed:cool:

CHANGE LOG

v1 posted

v2 made a log ( see below) of word compression

v3 fixed word compression

v4 added pics!

v5 made daily!

v6 added MOAR content

Edited June 22, 2014 by Dreadthrone
update

[Dreadthrone]

fixed all below is no more!

NOTEthe thesame

CHAPTERONE

warpthing....

testedmassive

SITTINGUPSIDE

jeb:brakes

evrything sofar

youwould offwhen y

Edited June 21, 2014 by Dreadthrone
fixed

[Dreadthrone]

im working on ANOTHER chapter now....

TWO CHAPTERS in one day!

expect one chapter every one or two days..

oh and if anyone wants to submit a craft i will accept! i will feature the first cool craft i see..

it must not use any mods other then these...

b9 aerospace

mechjeb

lacklusterslabs lite

k.a.s

gatling gun mod ( link here http://forum.kerbalspaceprogram.com/threads/42189-0-22-GatlingGun-mod)

vanguard aerospace

infernal robotics.. the one with the old textures not the new wip textures

Edited June 22, 2014 by Dreadthrone

[Dreadthrone]

fixed... sorry that the comments were a litttle spammy... had no idea early on that only i could see the pics...

oh and i am writing the chapter NOW if this is up.....

Edited June 21, 2014 by Dreadthrone
fixed

[guigui30000]

nice story, and I only see the picture 1/2/4/6

[Dreadthrone]

jeb: so now what am i going to do....

mission control: go into space....

jeb: SPACE time ANOMALY yeah!....

mission control: we lied.... they dont exist!...

jeb:

mission control: but this is no normal space rocket !

mission control: IT IS A FAST SPACE ROCKET!

jeb: LETS DO THIS

mission control: STEP INTO THE DRYER your still wet from crashing the plane...

after jeb got dried!

jeb: can i say mc for short?

mission control: yeah

jeb: good

jeb jumps into the rocket

mc: PREPARE FOR GS IN FIVE FOUR THREE TWO ONE KLASTOFF!

jeb: THEEEE GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGSSSSSSSSSSSSS

bubxl5k: PLEASE DONT DO A BARREL ROLL!

jeb: I WONT!!! THE GEEESSSESSESEYEYES

bubxl5k: slowing acceleration..... complete

jeb: yaaay!

bubxl5k: gravity turn started......

jeb: WOW half thrust and going at what would normaly be FULL thrust

bubxl5k: WOOOOOW orbit at 25 kilometers

jeb: coasting.....................................

bubxl5k: circularizing.....

mc: QUICK SPIN THE VEHICLE!!!!! YOU ARE ENTERING THE ATMOSPHERE PRESERVE ALL FUEL!!!

jeb: yeah

jeb: spinnnniiieeeeeeeeennggg ahhhhhhhHAHAHAHAH GEESESESEEESSESESEESE [

bubxl5k: stopping rotation..

bubxl5k: folding solar panels... done

bubxl5k: doing emergency re entry sureization...

jeb: thaanks foooor stooop spiiiiiniiing

jeb: re entry effects!

jeb: maxim of epic reached!

bubxl5k: suicide burn on.... decent slowed 100 90 80 70 60

jeb: close to ground WERE GOING TO FALL BOOM!

five hours later

bob: jeb have a bath you are covered in black char!

jeb: ........

next chapter coming tomorrow!

still looking for ships! ( one launch space stations especially!)

tomorrow i will stop looking and make my own.... so if anybody wants to get featured submit soon!

oh and i will name a kerbal after the first ship person to post a ship!

Edited June 22, 2014 by Dreadthrone

[Dreadthrone]

CHAPTER THREE

KALIEN SPACECRAFT!

jeb: why is the door bolted shut?

mc: we knew you would try to run to the rocket before we could brief yo.. wait where is jeb???!!!!

sound of rocket thrusting....

mc: ohh jeb..

jeb: so what is the briefing

mc:

mc: crash the rocket into some faraway island and never come back!

jeb: okay sounds fun!

mc: IT WAS JUST A JOKE!!!!! DON'T CRASH THE ROCKET IT COST 50 MILLION KOLLARS!!!

jeb: what is my real briefing then?...

mc: we have detected an extrakerrestrial craft you need to go up and do research and come back down...

jeb: sounds very very boring... apart from the kalean craft!

mc: we know... to make it less boring we did NOT install a power source to make it less boring.... did it work?

jeb: yeah.....

bob: ahhh no Monte the kug ate it....

jeb: ohhh

( a kug is a kerbal pug)

bubxl5k: circularizing...........

bubxl5k: done!

bubxl5k: malfunction rouge sub ai... staging

jeb: yikes....

jeb: burning for weird vessel......

bubxl5k: SYNCING VELOCITIES

jeb: hohhohhoh THAT looks FANCY

jeb: going eva.....

jeb: coooool!

jeb: i dont think it is activa OMG!!!

jeb: IM RUNNING SCREW THE RESEARCH IM RUNNING!

jeb: but first may as well steal a power gen...

jeb: returning to home vessel....

jeb: im VERY close now.....

jeb: bub i can hear you playing virtual chess inside there!

bubxl5k: I CONCEDE!!!

jeb: i knew i heard you....

i cant believe i made TWO chapters in ONE day!

prepare for the the next part of the chapter tomorrow!

Edited June 22, 2014 by Dreadthrone

[Dreadthrone]

note this is going to be a TINY chapter.. but i will release a standard sized chapter today...

mission control: jeb... prepare to purge a LOT of code...

jeb: this sounds easy...

bubxl5k: contacting wierd vessel in FIVE FOUR THREE TWO ONE PUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

jeb: WOW:confused: SO MUCH RANDOM JUNK

code.movement(thing)
forward.turn+thrust(thing do)
left.turn+thrust(thing do)
right.turn+thrust(thing do)
back.turn+thrust( thing also do)

ALL APPLY if turn=true thrust do (THING)

jeb: DELETE ALL!

bubxl5k: ALL DELETED! replacing with standard code.....

unnamed vessel: downloading database...... done downloading ai...... done bubxl5k hive ai activating....... downloading.... DONE naming vessel......

T.H.I.N.G: DONE

jeb: thing? are you joking?

i will add pics tomorrow!

[Dreadthrone]

got in a grudge and did not even START the chapter.....

next chapter is going to come up at about nine... jeb is going to be happy! ( for real this time....)

Edited June 23, 2014 by Dreadthrone

[Dreadthrone]

sorry if any of you were enjoying this! i got TIRED of launching rockets.... and i started looking for OP mods but they were all destroyed by the great mod Apocalypse of the spaceport going BOOM! all but one that is.... THE ORION MOD!

here is the link.

http://forum.kerbalspaceprogram.com/threads/28428-Orion-aka-Ol-Boom-boom

expect a chapter soon!

Edited June 29, 2014 by Dreadthrone

[Poryy]

Learn to spell, learn your grammar. This hurts to read.

[Dreadthrone]

Well, the first chapters were just little sketches created on open office. The new chapter is going to be much better in terms of grammar and originality and it will be non-glitched and non-open-office created.

[The Jedi Master]

Learn to spell, learn your grammar. This hurts to read.

Yes, this is completely helpful and not insulting him at all. /sarcasm

[KSK]

Open Office should be fine for writing. I'm using NeoOffice (Mac port of OpenOffice) and it works for me. It definitely has a spellchecker, not sure about a grammar checker. Then again, if Dreadthrone plans to write most of this as a script, grammar checking isn't so useful anyway.

If I could ask for one thing though - please could you lose the signature? I like pugs myself but it's distracting having that animation running on every second or third post!

[Dreadthrone]

Thanks for the feedback! No more signature.

Now I just upload directly onto the ksp forums.

I just copied some stuff from Open Office and it worked fine. Now it just makes a lot more sense to upload directly. For example if I make the story first then if I miss my shot that hit in the story I would have to redo the ENTIRE mission! Even if it is orbiting eeloo! What I do now is just write while the boring parts are going by and take pics every now and then and then upload them to imgur.

The new chapter is almost ready but it is not fully complete!

Edited June 30, 2014 by Dreadthrone

[KSK]

Cool - glad it helped. Flying the missions first, getting the screenshots and then putting the words around the screenshots does sound easier. No hurry with the new chapter - it'll be done when its done.

[Dreadthrone]

mission control: jeb!

jeb: i don't care if it dose not blow up.

mission control: jeb we know that!

jeb: ............

mission control: nuke propelled massive probably-pathological-murderer created weapon of mass propulsion

jeb: derp. the pathological murderer part is kinda disturbing though.

mission control: dah who cares! the creator was merely a highly unstable mental psychopath! and at the time covered in spice!

jeb: very very disturbing indeed.

mission control: we already have a craft with the w.m.p

jeb: what is the name?

mission control: THE AMAZING.... PUMPY MC PLATE!

jeb: wow i don't know what to say...

mission control: here is a live feed picture......

jeb: omg!

mission control: you and bob are going to space in that thing!

jeb: i don't think that TWO PEOPLE could man that thing....

mission control: don't worry Lars and edmin will be with you!

jeb: yay! two more crew!

five hours later....

jeb: blastoff in three two

bob: ONE! HA beat you to iiiiiIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!! THWEAAA GEGEGESSS

jeb: aww i dont get the glory of saying one;.;

mission control: jeb? we have a problem!

jeb: what?

mission control:

jeb: why do we care about a crater on duna?

mission control: that was our launch pad.......

jeb: .....

bob: LOOK OUT THE WINDOW!

bubxl5k: i would if i had a moving head... oh and you just breached the sound barrier!

jeb: re-entry speeds going up! wow!

Lars: wow plasma! i just patented a plasma ball!

jeb: dude YOU CANT PATENT A NATURAL THING!!!11!!!!

lars: well i took the plasma and clumped it into a ball! when was the last time you saw a ball of plasma in nature:D?

jeb: when i re-enter!

lars: oh we are getting this plasma by going super fast! going this fast is not natural:mad:!

jeb: well i patent grass then!

lars: NOOO MY LAWN!!!

jeb: and i also patent sugar!!

lars: NOOO MY CAKE!!!

jeb: i will un-patent it if you DON'T patent a plasma ball!

lars: FINE!

bob: jeb we are in orbit!

jeb: trajectory CORRECT! roll CORRECT! orbited CORRECT! Lars CORRECT! lemon CHECK! surface of planet..... SUCK!

bob: hahhahaha! Lars Lemon! HAHAHAHAH!

lars: .......

jeb: what now?

mission control: so... our list of "things to do with w.m.p's" says: Possibility no1 "blast into space at a massive velocity" CHECK possibility no2 "ferry a ship to duna" possibility no3 "land on eve" possibility no4 "launch from eves sea level and go into eve orbit" possibility no5 "

jeb: can you just say "p" instead of possibility?

mission control: FINE

jeb: AND stop the list!

mission control: fine!

jeb: now what?...

mission control: sending a vessel to pick you up!

jeb:

mission control: don't worry we have a more exiting mission!

jeb: what:)

mission control: we have a station in orbit around kerbin that is monitoring the extra-kerrestrial spacecraft! we need someone aboard the station just in case something bad happens!

jeb: fine.

mission control: don't worry it was a lie!

jeb: so now what?

mission control: TO DUNA! bill is flying up a lander right now!

jeb: what about that telescope?

mission control: it just found a new planet! SENTAR

jeb: meaning?

mission control: Super Exotic Neurotic Tub Achieved Rings!

jeb: cool!

mission control: its orbit is beyond that of eeloo but the ship you have there has enough nukes on board to destroy kerbin and make it into a cloud of dust orbiting the mun! so we decided that it would make a cooler target by FAR then duna!

jeb: if we have enough nukes to get this thing back to kerbin then yes!

mission control: ok doing calculations....

mission control: it looks like it!

jeb: lets have some nice kodka before we go into space... it is the source of all badassity!

bob: bill will bring some up...

meanwhile on the launch pad....

bill: so i'm going to sentar? joke? yes? maybe?

werner von kerman: dude why do you just keep asking that?! you know i will say yes one hundred percent of the time!

bill: did you check the life-support?

werner von kerman: YES!!!!!!

bill: science? math?

werner von kerman: YYEESS!!

bill: ok.

werner von kerman: actually no. go tell jeb that we have a shuttle going to pick him up for science experiments on the derpstation

five hours later......

jeb:

bob: now we will experiment with pugtonium!

jeb lets just hop on a spacecraft and go to the mun....

bob: you know what jeb... remember that shuttle that took us here a few hours ago?

jeb: .... yes

bob: it is currently in a near orbit and this station has a pod system that has seats for two!

jeb: YEAH but where would we go?

bob: the pumpy mc plate....

jeb:

bob: don't worry there will be much baddassery here we will take some fuel and go for the mun with the ENTIRE spacecraft! then we land on the mun plant a flag go back into space hop into.... pumpy mc plate and and then we return to kerbin circularize at a very high altitude and wait for a nuke craft to bring us more nukes and give us enough delta v to go to sentar!

jeb: i don't think sentar is a good idea yet...

bob: they are sending a probe to duna whatever the case...

lars: OMG OMG QUICK THE TO THE PUMPY MC PLATE! MUCH PUG MATTER GATHERING NEAR SENTAR!!!!

jeb: pug matter? what is pug matter?

lars: i have no idea... but i suggest going to get it!

bubxl5k: plotting course for pumpy mc plate... pug matter sounds fun.

bob: good that this station has a self destruct system...

bubxl5k: suggesting... that we blow the station to pretend that we died? this station itself cost five bucks...

jeb: what is ksc buying?

back in ksc..

werner von kerman: wow... the pumpy mc plate sure is a good joke for now... they will be surprised when they see the new faster BETTER GREATER ship we have constructed they will LAUGH for a long time that they thought the pumpy mc plate was the greatest ship in the kerbin system... they will have fun riding this thing... but it is only a test... for now.. the pumpy mc plate cant return from sentar... not enough nukes... but this new craft oh i want to say the name so much!!!! has more crew capacity and less mass wasted on fuel but twice the quantity of nukes..

back on the derpstation

jeb: what the heck was werner thinking when he randomly transmitted this into space... but i picked it up and it seems like the pmp ( pumpy mc plate) was just a little trick to show of the technology... but in reality they are secretly sending up a larger spacecraft i think we should just wait for the new craft...

bob: well YES

werner von kerman: i see you broke the surprise jeb you little !@#!#!$#!

jeb:

werner von kerman: well its finished so may as well send it up now....

bubxl5k: new craft found..... largest ever seen by kerbalkind....

BOOM!

jeb: we aren't on the ground right?

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

jeb: OMG i can see the entire surface of the planet lighting up!

werner von kerman: i knew jeb would love this thing...

station heads up speakers: WARNING INTEGRITY COMPROMISED!! STATION IS HIGHLY UNSTABLE! SUGGESTED ACTION..... GTFO!

jeb: RUN!

bob: get to the shuttles!

( yes jeb is freaked out...)

lars: AHHHAHAHAHHAHAHHHHHH! SAVE MEEE!!!

Sorry for the MASSIVE wait...

the reason this does not have any station pics is because i couldn't

keep this chapter unposted any longer! i will add pics tomorow.

​

[Dreadthrone]

sorry for the ( basically) dead page i just haven't been having much fun with ksp for some reason...... this might become weekly... or maybe even longer

i have been playing ksp for over a year now and have visited two planets. and i have done ninety percent of the interesting stuff! planetary surfaces just aren't interesting enough and loading pictures is pretty much doubling the time it takes to create these. and videos just cant be as funny as stories can. so this is going to become a mere side project i will upload as often as i feel like it. ITS NOT OVER YET!

expect two more chapters for this season i just cant keep the main story line suspended for fifteen plus chapters.

this is going to be the shortest season ever! but for now just have a chapter made from some OOOLD pictures i have lying around of my first ksp vessels!

it is a new series that you can find here http://forum.kerbalspaceprogram.com/threads/85282-DREADLAND-HISTORY-a-ksp-comedy-season-one?p=1254072#post1254072 (WUB!)

Edited July 8, 2014 by Dreadthrone