Kerbal Clerihews

[Flymetothemun]

I've recently become amused by a form of poetry called the clerihew. I figured I'd write some based on the names of Kerbals.

For the curious: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clerihew

Mr. Jebediah Kerman

In a chair sat and from a book learnin'.

This picture is terribly wrong

Jeb's always drunk and he's singing a song.

"Is it true that Mr. Bob Kerman

Like hammer-wielding and fuel valve turnin'?"

No, you are far from right

He'd prefer if you'd keep such things out of sight.

Mr. Kerman, Bill

Says the name field on the doctor's bill.

He did not become sick, though

Jeb had a very fast rover, and with a rope Bill was in tow.

Mr. Luke Kerman, oh boy!

To him rockets are just a toy!

He loves to mess around with rovers, too,

But don't let him around blowtorches, or you'll be singin' the blues.

It says Mr. Kerman, Newmore

In BARIS has had quite the score.

But test him out in real life

He'll cry screams of anger and strife.

Mr. Kerman, Bartmon

Took a flying test and was completely wrong.

But due to the Kerbal mindset,

Rocket pilot status is what he'll get.

Ribtop Kerman

has desperately been yearnin'

For something fast to fly

Doesn't he know that debris fills the sky?

Just yesterday Kerman, Thomping

Went to a Munar crater and did some romping.

So far he has not come back

It is speculated that gravity executed an attack.

It is said that Kerman, Raybus

Went to the warehouse and inhaled some dust.

Now he has a terrible cough

So perhaps of the fighter jet, he should get off.