The basic problem arises from how KSP describes rockets. It uses a tree data structure; all parts have a single 'parent' part which is the part you clipped the new part onto. Basically you've got 3 engines whose parent is the tri-coupler, and the lower one can only have one 'parent', so the other two connections are not connected, physically, as far as the game is concerned, so you have off-axis forces which causes problems. There's a couple solutions you could try. My personal preference for interplanetary stages with LV-N's is to use sidepods- there's a number of ways to connect them, and you'll need to ensure you include a fuel hose if you want to pull fuel from the center tank. Alternatively, you can leave the setup you have now, but augment the connection with a web of struts. You may need to do this anyways as rockets of that size tend to have rigidity problems already. Struts bypass the whole tree idea a bit and create physical links between any two parts. Your third option is to use docking adapters on the bottom of the engines, on the other side of the decouplers (so you can remove them when the engines are ready to fire). Docking ports, I'm told, can create multi-joins at least as far as forces are concerned. I've never attempted it myself since in the past it didn't work. If you go with struts, you can use trusses or I-beams on the side of the tanks to clear the lip of the couples/engines.