How KSP Changed My Life

[tntristan12]

Good morning, everyone.

Today, I would like to talk about something that I feel I have begun to take for granted in recent years. Perhaps in light of the ongoing debate over whether or not KSP 1.0 is "good enough", or perhaps because I'm just feeling oddly sentimental today, I feel like I should bring to light a personal story, which will hopefully serve to illustrate why KSP is a cut or two above any game I have ever played, despite its imperfections. This is the story of how KSP changed my life, and it's going to be a long one. There will be no tl;dr at the end, so if you don't want to read, you don't have to. I suppose it's just something I've been wanting to get off my chest for a few days now.

You see, in 2011, I was an undergraduate at the University of Florida studying nuclear engineering. "Why nuclear engineering?" nobody asked... because I was also a midshipman in the Naval Reserve Officer Training Corps (NROTC), and had been for 3 years running. This was the year before my graduation, and me, being of unconventional fitness (read: very out of shape) for a naval officer in training, I was probably having a harder time assimilating than most in my class. In fact, I would go so far as to say I never truly felt like I belonged in the military, but since I had been a cadet for four years in high school, and a midshipman for three years in college, well... Newton's first law, and all that. It was very hard to alter the trajectory of my life by that point. So, I had resigned myself to an unhappy life wherein my degree felt bought rather than earned, and the one job I was qualified for was a job that made me feel like an outsider, to say the least. It should therefore go without saying that I was suffering through a very real battle with depression. I will not go into detail, but there was a very real chance I would not be here today if certain things didn't happen the way they did.

I would like to talk about one of those things, when a friend of mine who I'd known for about a year before had randomly started messaging me about this fun little game where you could launch things into the air and watch them explode. He had just downloaded a mod which introduced a giant sandstone brick that was supposed to be placed into orbit for the extra challenge. He was talking about a new game called Kerbal Space Program.

Now, before I get into my reasons for being as excited as I was, let me tell you a little bit of background information about myself. I grew up in Florida, and not too far from a town called Titusville. For those of you who don't know, Titusville is Astronaut City - a stonesthrow away from Kennedy Space Center (the real KSC). Because of this, I was always interested in space growing up. I would watch the science channel to learn about astronomy and the history of the universe. Astronauts often spoke at my school, and would talk about the space shuttle and International Space Station as the breaking developments of the day. To top it all off, my grandfather was an engineer on both Gemini and Apollo, and his stories fueled the fire of my curiosity. I used to read books about space, space ships, space travel, astronauts, the space station, Apollo, the Constellation Program, you name it. I even drew sketches of rockets and aircraft before I even knew what they properly looked like! That was me...

...And for a long time, I forgot that. It had been over 30 years since the last time anybody had been to the moon, and nobody was talking about going back. Interest in STEM in my school was at an all-time low, and nobody seemed interested in turning science fiction into science fact. Throw in 9/11, the war on terror, and now you had an entire generation entering high school whose only real calling was to serve in the military. I guess I got swept up in that, and that's how I ended up forgetting my passion. Like I said, for seven long years I didn't devote an iota of thought to the aerospace industry. I'd forgotten about it.

So, anyway, back to 2011. KSP had just come out, and when I downloaded it for the first time and built my first tentative rocket, I was ecstatic! It took me several weeks before I put my first virtual rocket into orbit (keep in mind, this was before the map view came out, so the only way to verify your orbit was to look at tables circulating around on the forums to make sure your velocity was correct for the altitude). When I downloaded my first mod, I could put satellites into orbit! I could pretend that I was my grandfather, working on Gemini balancing my designs, making sure they weren't too heavy but could still make orbit. I wanted to learn everything! The Tsiolkovsky rocket equation was the first thing of many things I picked up during my independent research. In a month, I was obsessed! When the Mun first came out in 0.12, I could become an Apollo astronaut, blazing a trail to the moon and witnessing the amazing feats of engineering I was born too late to see. I was so entranced by this game that my studies began to suffer. It depressed me that I could finally live my life's dream, but only in a game...

So, I did something about it... I quit! It took me another year, but eventually I got up the courage to do what it had taken me eight long years to do... I quit ROTC, and decided that my future would belong in the private sector. They tried to talk me out of it, and I lost the support of my family along the way, but oddly, I felt like it was the first decision I'd ever made in my entire adult life. However, the question arose: Where do I go from here?

Well, I won't bore you with the details, but amidst all the turmoil of my late, fateful decision on that one day in April just over three years ago, a woman came into my life and helped me pick up the pieces. She didn't know about rockets, or Tsiolkovsky, or KSP, or any of that, but she brought stability to my life that until then, I'd just never experienced. With her encouragement, I applied for graduate school at UF, for aerospace engineering. Me - a washed up officer candidate with a degree in an unrelated field whose only exposure to aerospace systems was a computer game and books that I'd read over a decade ago - and, against all odds, I was accepted!

As I attended my first classes, I realized how much background I had already accumulated through my own research. They never explained what Delta-V was, but I knew! They never told me how the last point an external impulse was applied to a satellite must always be on the resulting orbit, but I knew! I knew the shape of an orbit because I had already done the research, because KSP had inspired me to do so! As a result, I was exactly where I needed to be. When I approached a professor about research opportunities with the university, he told me something I would never forget:

Whatever you may have done in the past; whatever experience you may be lacking, you made the decision to change your path, and adapt to the opportunities available to you now.

But I would not have sought these opportunities if it weren't for that game I'd been introduced to in 2011. I would not have gotten involved in a project to build (and subsequently annihilate) a satellite for science. I would not have gone to New Mexico this past summer to research satellite dynamics, and win an award for my research. I would not have a thesis and a journal publication pending because I would have been stuck in the past, going through the motions of a life I didn't really want.

So, you see, when I say KSP changed my life, I mean that it saved my life. I may not have always agreed with the direction it has taken as a game, but KSP did what nothing else in my life had ever done to that point - it inspired me to chase down what had only been a dream before. Today, I am finalizing my thesis after having received some excellent praise on it from my research advisor. I'm on track to graduate this August with a completely new degree, after having literally altered the trajectory of my life because of a computer game that came out in 2011. My resume is stronger than it's ever been, and I am already looking at jobs as a contractor (ironically) for the US Air Force (yes, I may not have gone into the military, but I will at least get the chance to serve my country using nothing but my education and ingenuity).

I owe KSP a huge debt of gratitude for its part in helping me make this decision. Felipe: Thank you for making this game! It has truly changed my life.

Thank you for reading.

[KatzOhki]

Wow, congrats man on turning your life around and finding something that you feel is worthwhile to you. There's no better feeling in the world than having a career in doing exactly what you want.

[Jovus]

There's nothing to say to this except congratulations.

Oh, and I'm jealous. I'm trying to get into a PhD program myself at the moment. (For observational astronomy, but I'm sorely tempted to switch to aerospace...)

[Esme]

Congratulations, tntristan12, I am so pleased and happy for you!

Regards,

Esme

[sardaukar11]

Congrats tntristan!!!!

[KSK]

What an inspirational way to end the week - thanks tntristan12!

Am grinning like Jeb right now. Bit misty eyed too to tell the truth.

[justidutch]

@tntristan12:

That was an inspiring read, thanks for sharing! Congratulations on finding the path that appears to be the correct one. I hope that your family has seen the light, or will soon, and can accept this positive change. And cheers to that friend of yours who helped you along the way, that is very fortunate!

[Xacktar]

Awesome story.

Thank you for sharing it with us!

[Endersmens]

Exactly what KSK just said. I'm smiling like an idiot in class right now holding back the urge to shed a happy tear. Nothing makes me happier than hearing about how others overcame struggles in their life. And the fact that its because of the best Space game in the universe just makes it even better. Congrats man, Congrats. Also, you should give us a way to read your thesis. I'm sure lots of people here would be interested.

KSP has also changed my life. For the longest time I wanted to be a pilot. I had everything planned out. 3 times. First it was becoming a commercial pilot for UPS. Then it was a charter service. Then it was Air Force.

But now I know my calling is in the aerospace industry. I still plan on being a private pilot on my on leisure, but I know I'm going into aerospace. I've already been scouting colleges online for aerospace degrees. Now I just need to find the right field of aerospace. I'm so excited. And i've never been excited about college.

[Dichotomy]

Well done mate! Kudos for both finding, and sticking to your dream.

I would wish you all the best, but I do not think your future will depend on the generosity of fortune. Instead may I say I admire your resolve.

Take it easy

[The Science Bucket]

This is great to hear, congrats to you!

On a smaller scale, KSP has been an influence for me too. Two weeks ago I lost my job, three days before that I had decided to quit and go back to school for airframe and powerplant certs (I've been in graphic design for 15 years). I've always loved aviation and messing around in KSP has helped me decide on flight as a career.

[OSUNightfall]

Good for you, buddy! Congratulations on grabbing the reins of your own life!

[RainDreamer]

Man, changing orbital direction is never an easy thing. But you managed to turn the orbit of your life from retrograde to prograde! Congratulation!

[ShadowZone]

This is a beautiful story. Good on you that you found the courage to turn your life around!

Makes me question my career decisions myself...

[The Yellow Dart]

Good post.

[Astronut]

What a great story. Congratulations!

It is so important to have some kind of dream and not to let go of it. I was lucky I guess. I knew what I wanted to do career wise since I was a small boy. It took me awhile but after lots of twists, turns, bumps in the road and a lot of luck, I managed to finally get to get on the career path I always wanted. I also know what it is like to be on a career path that I had no real interest in, and that can be soul destroying.

[tntristan12]

Thanks everyone! I know it's a but of a personal tale, but I guess I was feeling reflective. In any case, I'm grateful for the devs and this amazing game!

[Gaarst]

Wow, amazing story, someone could make a movie out of it !

And congrats !

[Nansuchao]

Thanks Tristan. I feel you like a brother. I'm in a similar situation like you were many years ago.

I'm happy to see that you've made it. It gives more hopes to me, for the hard days coming.

Thanks...