Wayfare Posted October 20, 2013 Share Posted October 20, 2013 (edited) GERONIMI 1: THE RIGHT STUFF---KSC PRESS CENTER, Y1 D0---GENE: Ladies and gentlemen of the press, as flight director at the Kerbal Space Center my first priority has been to select a group of astronauts that will lead our way into space. From a long line of recruits I am proud to present majors Kerman, Kerman and Kerman!GENE: Yes Robert, that will get confusing, I'm glad you asked. So we'll use their first names. Jebediah, Bill and Bob. What's that Frank? No, it's OK to take pictures with flash. Flash resistance is something they've all been tested for. Any further questions?---KSC ASTRONAUT COMPLEX, Y1 D1---JEB: This jetpack is awesome! I wonder if you could use a heavier version of it to move a spacecraft. Hmm, maybe I should... Oh, hi Gene!GENE: Jeb, the names have been drawn for the rotation. Bob got Geronimi Three. Bill made Two. That puts you in One. Congratulations Jeb. You're going to be the first Geronimi pilot.JEB: First!---KSC MISSION CONTROL, Y1 D4---GENE: Alright guys, let's sound off. FIDO?FIDO: Go flight.GENE: BUTTONS?BUTTONS: Go flight.GENE: ODIE?ODIE: Ready to go, flight.GENE: GROMIT?GROMIT: Go flight.BILL: Did Gene name all the mission control stations after cartoon dogs?BOB: Tee hee! I can't wait to hear from Jeb. Hey, you're up Bill.GENE: CAPCOM?BILL: Go flight. Jeb, this is Bill in CAPCOM. Are you ready for your big day?JEB: Are you [bLEEP] kidding me?MISSION CONTROL: *muffled laughter over radio*JEB: Laugh it up guys. Laugh it up.BILL: Alright Jeb, we're reporting nominal readings on all stations. Geronimi One is good to go in ten, nine, eight...MISSION CONTROL: *more laughter*JEB: *unintelligible muttering*BILL: Roger that Geronimi One. Log your crew report and prepare to EVA.JEB: I can't wait to walk around in a spacesuit in the afternoon sun.BILL: Flight has cleared you for EVA. Godspeed Major Kerman! MISSION CONTROL: *laughter*JEB: *pant, huff* - OK I've wrestled myself out of that little coffin. BILL: Outstanding Geronimi One. You want to say it?JEB: Say what?BILL: Your famous words to mark this historical occasion. I know you were up all night writing them.JEB: [bLEEP] you.BILL: Four by four, Jeb. Momentous words indeed as we mark the first time a Kerbal steps out of a command pod on the launchpad.MISSION CONTROL: *laughter*BILL: Now collect a surface sample and log an EVA report. Make sure you store them both back in the pod.JEB: This is ridiculous.BILL: We're testing procedures and capabilities here, space hero. Get on with it.JEB: Alright. Done. Now what?BILL: Flip to page two of your mission checklist.JEB: I'm reading... No way.MISSION CONTROL: *laughter*BILL: Put those legs to work.JEB: *groan*JEB: *huff, huff* CAPCOM, I have retrieved a surface sample from beside the launchpad. It's the most unamazing handful of dirt and grass you ever did see.BILL: Fantastic work, Jeb. That marks one hundred percent completion of Geronimi One's mission objectives. We're popping champagne over here!JEB: Yeah. Just try to keep someone sober enough to drive me back to my bunk.MISSION SCIENCE YIELD: 29TECH UNLOCKED: Basic Rocketry, Survivability Edited October 26, 2013 by Wayfare Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fleet Master Posted October 20, 2013 Share Posted October 20, 2013 I lel'd This is good and pretty entertaining, Good job!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimeOlord Posted October 20, 2013 Share Posted October 20, 2013 That Was Great! Hilarious! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Itchono Posted October 20, 2013 Share Posted October 20, 2013 Amazing first mission. Can't wait to see the next ones! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
team.leit Posted October 21, 2013 Share Posted October 21, 2013 That Was Great! Hilarious!My thoughts exactly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KerbMav Posted October 21, 2013 Share Posted October 21, 2013 Beautiful! I confess - I tortured my Kerbal to also test the antenna with repetitive reports until the batteries failed ... bad me ... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest links123 Posted October 21, 2013 Share Posted October 21, 2013 I tortured my Kerbal to test the antenna and everything goes well. My batteries worked fine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xacktar Posted October 21, 2013 Share Posted October 21, 2013 Ehehehe. Very funny. XD Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KerbMav Posted October 21, 2013 Share Posted October 21, 2013 (edited) I tortured my Kerbal to test the antenna and everything goes well. My batteries worked fine.Meaning: I had him repeat the same experiment over and over until the batteries were depleted. Edited October 21, 2013 by KerbMav Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KSK Posted October 21, 2013 Share Posted October 21, 2013 That's one (very small) step for Jeb... Great stuff Wayfare - looking forward to more of this! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tom1499 Posted October 21, 2013 Share Posted October 21, 2013 Great story. I couldn't help but laugh when I realized what Jebs job was. MOAR. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wayfare Posted October 21, 2013 Author Share Posted October 21, 2013 GERONIMI 2: IT'S HORRIBLE IN HERE---KSC RESEARCH AND DEVELOPMENT, Y1 D6---WERNER: Gutentag, Bill!BILL: Hello professor Von Kerman.WERNER: Please, call me Werner. Bill, I vant you to see zis. It is ze first experiment ve have produced for Geronimi.BILL: What... Is it?WERNER: Goo!BILL: OK... So what does it do?WERNER: Vell, zat is for you und your friends to find out. Ve vill put ze goo into ze containers und strap zem to ze side of ze Geronimi capsule. Vonce you go up, you check ze goo und record vot it does, ja?BILL: That is a spacecraft, sir. We do not refer to it as a capsule. Spacecraft.---KSC LAUNCHPAD, Y1 D8---JEB: You comfy in that can, Bill?BILL: Sitting pretty, CAPCOM. Can't wait to get some air under this thing.JEB: Alright. Keep in mind we're testing only the Geronimi orbiter here. Engine's got a bit of a kick because it's such a light package, even with your lard [bLEEP] in it.BILL: Got it. JEB: Do those breathing excercises I taught you. Geronimi Two, you are go for launch in ten, nine, eight, seven...BILL: Ack... Ack... Ack... Ack...JEB: ...Four, three, two, one, ignition!BILL: Ack. Ack. Ack. Ack.JEB: Looking good on ballistics Bill, you're thirty seconds from main engine cut-off. Twenty-five, twenty-four, twenty-three...BILL: Ack! Ack! Ack! Ack!JEB: ...Seventeen, sixteen, fifteen, fourteen...BILL: Ackackackackackack..!JEB: ...Four, three, two, one, MECO! That was the burn. Did the breathing excercises help?BILL: [bLEEP] MOTHER OF A [bLEEP]! NO!JEB: Figured as much. Head in the game now, major – pop the goo, log a crew report and stage that engine off.BILL: [bLEEP].JEB: Telemetry looking good, you're heading for the drink. BILL: *pant* Alright, chute... Deploy.JEB: You got something hanging out your nose, Geronimi Two.BILL: I don't feel too...JEB: Chute deployed to full. That is beautiful, Geronimi Two, what a sight – what a moment!BILL: *Bwaaaargh!*JEB: We really need to work on our first words for this stuff.JEB: We see you splashed down, Geronimi Two. Do you feel up for the kicker of this mission?BILL: Yes. Anything to get out of this pod. It's horrible in here.JEB: Out you go then. Pop the second goo pod, take a water sample and log an EVA report. We're sending the boats out to fetch you.MISSION SCIENCE YIELD: 37TECH UNLOCKED: General Rocketry, Stability Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wayfare Posted October 21, 2013 Author Share Posted October 21, 2013 MOAR.There you go, inside of ten minutes - how's that for pleasing the fans? Thanks for all your wonderful comments people! I'm glad this is getting such a response. This AAR is documenting my actual career game right now. I hope to turn the Geronimi Program into a tutorial pack for our newer players, taking it one step a time to orbit... And beyond? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danish_Savage Posted October 21, 2013 Share Posted October 21, 2013 There you go, inside of ten minutes - how's that for pleasing the fans? Thanks for all your wonderful comments people! I'm glad this is getting such a response. This AAR is documenting my actual career game right now. I hope to turn the Geronimi Program into a tutorial pack for our newer players, taking it one step a time to orbit... And beyond?Fantastic Im usually only reading Mason and Czo, so reaching that is a bit of an honour I love thy homour Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KSK Posted October 21, 2013 Share Posted October 21, 2013 This fan is pleased. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xacktar Posted October 21, 2013 Share Posted October 21, 2013 Double MOAR. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wayfare Posted October 22, 2013 Author Share Posted October 22, 2013 (edited) GERONIMI 3: IN SPACE, EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU SWEAR---KSC ASTRONAUT FACILITY, Y1 D10---BOB: So Jeb souped up the jetpack a bit, let's give this a tr...*WOOOOOSH!*BOB: YEEEEAAAARGH!*CRASH!*BOB: [bLEEP]!GENE: Bob? Are you OK?BOB: [bLEEP]. Ouch... Hello, Gene. Yeah. Just need a few minutes alone with Jeb. That [bLEEP] put some...GENE: Stop right there. That's what we need to talk about.BOB: Jeb?GENE: No. [bLEEP]. Geronimi Three is going to space, Bob. You're going to be an all-Kerbin hero and there'll be a lot of cameras around the KSC. Cameras with microphones. Do you get my drift?BOB: I think I do.GENE: Good. They're getting a little tired of bleeping out every second word you guys say. So don't say [bLEEP] on national television, please.BOB: How about [bLEEP]?GENE: No.BOB: Or [bLEEP] of a [bLEEP]?GENE: No, not that either.BOB: What about [bLEEP]ing [bLEEP]?GENE: Absolutely not.BOB: But they serve those in the cafeteria.GENE: Look, whenever you want to say [bLEEP] or [bLEEP] or mother of [bLEEP], just say something else like, I dunno... Gosh. Or golly. Or geepers.BOB: Geepers?---KSC LAUNCH PAD, Y1 D12---BILL: Good morning Geronimi Three, CAPCOM, you all settled in there Bob?BOB: Gosh CAPCOM, I'm as golly as a geeper in here! MISSION CONTROL: *laughter*BILL: Good to hear that major. You are go for launch in ten, nine, eight, seven...BILL: ...Two, one, ignition! Ignition and lift-off of Geronimi Three putting the first Kerbal in space! How are you Bob? Not doing those breathing exercises I hope?BOB: Not at all, CAPCOM. It's... *huff*... A bit of a gosh to keep my hands... *huff*... She bucks like a golly but the nose is pointing true.BILL: Roger that, Geronimi Three. It'll build up as the fuel drains. Just hang tight. Transmit your high-atmo report and then pop the first goo pod.BOB: Done... *huff*... And done.BILL: Stand by for first sage seperation.*KLANG!*BOB: Mothe... Geepers! That was one gosh of a kick! *huff*... Building up some serious speed now.BILL: We're reading your telemetry, Geronimi Three. Looking good. Looking real good.BOB: Golly CAPCOM the view is amazing up here! Gosh-geepering amazing! I can see the curvature of Kerbin... Wow what a sight. And... Oh! Oh, CAPCOM I can see something fantastic right at mission control!BILL: What is it Bob?BOB: It's Jeb's ego! It's so huge and shiny!MISSION CONTROL: *laughter*BOB: But it seems to be... Yeah CAPCOM, it is definitely getting smaller as I'm going higher, higher than he's ever been.JEB: [bLEEP] you Bob!GENE: Jeb! National television!BILL: Both you [bLEEP]s get off the channel! Only CAPCOM speaks to the astronaut!MISSION CONTROL: *laughter and sounds of a minor scuffle*BOB: I'm at apokee, CAPCOM. Starting to get real light now. Oh man this is a stomach-churner. There's, uh... There seems to be loose change floating out of my pockets. Golly. That's gonna be a gosh to pick out of the instruments. I've popped the second goo pod and made another report. CAPCOM?MISSION CONTROL: *static interrupted by sounds of a major scuffle*BOB: Separating orbital engine. That's a long way down. CAPCOM?BILL: Geronimi Three, CAPCOM. We got a little side-tracked there for a moment, sorry about that. We see you on a ballistic re-entry. You touched eighty-thousand four-hundred and seventy-four meters there Bob, that is well in space. Congratulations! There's a gold pin waiting for you when you get back down.BOB: I'm hitting atmo now... Gosh that's a kick in the golly... Gosh! GOSH!BILL: Bob, Gene advises to take it easy on the G-words...BOB: GOLLYING GEEPER THE POD IS ON FIRE! NO-ONE SAID ANYTHING ABOUT THE GOSHING POD BEING ON FIRE! SON OF A GEEPER!BILL: Chute deploying in ten, nine, eight...BOB: GEEPERING GOLLY! THAT WAS AWFUL!BILL: Settle down, major. You're on a beatiful descent. Boats are coming out.BOB: They'd goshing well better be.GENE: I bet they're going to be bleeping over the G-words now, too... [bLEEP]. Yup.MISSION SCIENCE YIELD: 37TECH UNLOCKED: General Construction Edited October 22, 2013 by Wayfare Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danish_Savage Posted October 22, 2013 Share Posted October 22, 2013 I so love this.Thanks mate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KSK Posted October 22, 2013 Share Posted October 22, 2013 "But they serve those in the cafeteria."You very nearly owed me a new keyboard! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xacktar Posted October 22, 2013 Share Posted October 22, 2013 Geepering Golly that was awesome. Keep it up! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Will Fawkes Posted October 22, 2013 Share Posted October 22, 2013 Very much owe me a new laptop screen... oh wait no I'm good... I think. Just need to take the whole thing apart.Nice use of the promo video still frames. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
team.leit Posted October 22, 2013 Share Posted October 22, 2013 I saw a lot of red at the beginning, otherwise an excellent story! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wayfare Posted October 22, 2013 Author Share Posted October 22, 2013 (edited) I saw a lot of red at the beginningThat was about half the plot right there Thanks again for the kind words folks, they are much appreciated! Keyboards, laptop screens and other desktop paraphernalia are not covered under this AARs warranty. Read at your own risk.Nice use of the promo video still frames.Double thanks for that Edited October 22, 2013 by Wayfare Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sesni Posted October 22, 2013 Share Posted October 22, 2013 Wow. How do you even that? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wayfare Posted October 22, 2013 Author Share Posted October 22, 2013 Wow. How do you even that?Well... I took a screenshot from the and three in-game screenshots of the Geronimi 2 launch from my own game, and threw them together into fotor.com's collage maker. I'm no wizard Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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