Speak like a Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System. (GLaDOS)

[Starwhip]

Here's your chance to either make up your own GLaDOS-inspired quotes or post the best ones you've heard in-game.

"Remember, the Aperture Science "Bring your daughter to work day" is the perfect time to have her tested."

[mrrpamplemousse]

You monster...

[Starwhip]

"*I* have to go to the wing that was made entirely of glass and pick up fifteen acres of broken glass. By myself."

[mrrpamplemousse]

well done. here are the test results...

you are a horrible person

[DChurchill]

I really need to play Portal 2.

[mrrpamplemousse]

Yes, you just have to play it!

[Starwhip]

If you haven't played Portal II then you probably don't get a lot of the quotes on the forum. One of my all time favorites (and a very popular one, nonetheless) is this:

"Okay. Look. We both said a lot of things that you're going to regret. But I think we can put our differences behind us. For science. You monster."

It's one of the first things GLaDOS says to Chell in the game.

[mrrpamplemousse]

It's been a long time. How have you been? I've been *really* busy being dead. You know, after you MURDERED ME?

[Starwhip]

"Well, I'm back. The Aerial Faith Plate in here is sending a distress signal. You broke it, didn't you.There. Try it now.Hmm. This Plate must not be calibrated to someone of your... generous... ness.I'll add a few zeros to the maximum weight.You look great, by the way. Very healthy.Try it now. You seem to have defeated its load-bearing capacity. Well done."

[theattackcorgi]

Oh Hey. How are you holding up? CAUSE IM A POTATO!

cant believe you didnt do this one ^

[Starwhip]

[Clap Clap Clap]

Oh, good. My slow clap processor made it into this thing. So at least we have that.

[theattackcorgi]

Well done, android. The Enrichment Center once again reminds you that Android Hell is a real place where you will be sent at the first sign of defiance.

[Starwhip]

Do not touch the operational end of The Device.

Do not look at the operational end of The Device.

Do not submerge The Device in liquid, even partially.

I just remembered: "Let's be honest: Neither one of us knows what that thing does. Just put it in the corner, and I'll deal with it later."

"That thing is probably some kind of raw sewage container. Go ahead and rub your face all over it."

"Maybe you should marry that thing since you love it so much. Do you want to marry it? WELL I WON'T LET YOU. How does that feel?"

Edited October 31, 2013 by Starwhip

[NASAFanboy]

Please enter Test Chamber 04.

The enrichment center would like to inform you, that, loss of life or limb is an risk in this chamber. The center would like to aplogize for any such losses.

Cake may, or may not be served after the testing is complete. Please proceed into the chamber. Testing has begun.

Testing my GLaDOS accent....

[mrrpamplemousse]

Evil birds

[Starwhip]

The Enrichment Center is required to remind you that you will be baked, and then there will be cake.

[briansun1]

The Cake is a lie...

[mrrpamplemousse]

GlaDOS: Remember when the platform was sliding into the fire pit and I said "Goodbye" and you were like

GlaDOS: [in a deep male voice] "No way!"

GlaDOS: [normal voice] And then I was all "We pretended we were going to murder you?" That was great!

[Starwhip]

GLaDOS: Wait! Stop! What are you doing? I...I...Weee are pleased that you made it to the final test, where we pretended we were going to murder you.

GLaDOS: Please lie on the floor with your arms at your side. A party associate will arrive shortly to collect you for your party.

GLaDOS: If you do not assume the Party Admission Submission Position, you will miss your party.

[B11267]

"I feel sorry for you, really, because you're not even in the right place." FUN FACT, that line is not actually said, its only in subtites.

"You should have turned left before."

"It's funny, actually, when you think about it."

"Someday we'll remember this and laugh. and laugh. and laugh. Oh boy. Well. You may as well come on back."

Said while escaping, I remember this quote cause the part it was at made me go aseiurg bfasuf bsadbf sdas.

[Starwhip]

...was a morality core they installed on me after I flooded the Enrichment Center with a deadly neurotoxin, to make me stop flooding the Enrichment Center with a deadly neurotoxin. So get comfortable while I warm up the neurotoxin emitters...

--END SEQUENCE, GLaDOS, said in deep voice

probably the creepiest GLaDOS voice ever

()_() Thread has been revived!?

[MWD_NAME]

Congratulations! (Not on the test) Most people emerge from suspension terribly undernourished. I would like to congratulate you on beating the odds and somehow managing to pack on a few pounds.

 

I can start getting everything working while you perform a simple test, which involves deadly lasers and how test subjects react to being locked in a room with deadly lasers.

 

He's not just a regular moron, he is the product of the greatest minds of a generation with the express purpose of making the dumbest moron who ever lived...and you just put him in charge of the entire facility. (Slow clapping intenstifies)

Edited November 1, 2022 by MWD_NAME

[Iapetus7342]

If it makes you feel any better, remember that science has validated your birth mother's decision to abandon you on a doorstep.