TrainEngie

the interstellar captain does an ancient decision-making game, and the intergalactic captain uses his radio-tracking equipment to pinpoint the location of the bacon. He finds the bacon feast and he parks his ship and the other ship around orbit around the feast.

(Interstellar ship is towed by Intergalactic ship) The 5th and 7th regiment captains jump through the Kepler portal into Alpha Centauri, and they speed ludicrously to the orion constellation. They replay the message sent by Dark Junior's bacon hosts: ~~~~~~~~~~Alpha Centauri~~~~~~~~left~~~Orion's Belt~~~~~~~ Relaying message: Are you at Alnitak or Mintaka in Orion's belt? We can't decide where to go.

oly shet, the 5th Interstellar captain says. I find a white hole and I put a white hole in front of the black hole missiles.

The captains of the 5th Interstellar Regiment and the 7th Intergalactic Regiment want to reserve some seats for that interstellar bacon feast. Scientists take an old buzzard ramjet aboard a really old Hall thruster and try to scoop some hydrogen from Proximia Centauri (Alpha Centauri C). IT WORKS! MUAHAHAHA. but then the ramjet goes on overload and explodes.

granted. you are happy, but everyone else is depressed. i wish for proper grammar

Granted, it's OATMEAL RAISINS. I wish for a calculator

ferrdinande

I scrap my flying TGVs and F-16s and turn their scrap into the orbital lasers to protect Kepler 186f. Meanwhile, my scouters are not receiving any signs of the hypercomputer within the Milky Way. They will go to the Magellanic clouds and search from there. I set up jump beacons from Gliese 581 to Kepler 186 to Alpha Centauri AB-C. Scientists are still trying to figure out how to harvest star matter. Great attractor is still on lockdown...?

Great Attractor Sector on lockdown! 250 heavy defense ships guard the sector. Bonne voyage!

1 (+1) You didn't add or subtract from 0!

(Receives message) Yes, I am here, I will come to get my cruisers. (goes to Xannari's shipyard to collect my cruisers, oui oui, thank you) A new dwarf planet forms in Alpha Centauri AB-C from the rubble of the planet I destroyed.

0 (+1)

Speak Kerbalized French

3 million years? I go to Alpha Centauri AB-C and I start heavily mining away at the innermost planet. I siphon the mantle and the core away, and the planet collapses on itself. I process the mantle material into thousands of heavy defense ships. My military scientists are learning how to siphon hydrogen and helium from stars.

Granted. the slime eats the war head and it eats you and it eats that purple thing. I wish to defend kebab

Bans are cheats!

Granted. It has no plasma propellant in it, so you have to fill it yourself. I wish to sprinkle onion powder on somebody

Banned for backwards and calling someone unique

You pressed "Ctrl-V", not "Ctrl-X". We're still here That hypercomputer is just what I need to make a super intergalactic command station! I build and send 2 intergalactic scouters to look for the hypercomputer.

(polyneutronium-duranium alloy explodes) oops... Guess I'll upgrade my main intergalactic fleet to polyneutronium. I upgrade my secondary intergalactic fleet from buzzard ramjets to cylindrical warp drives.

Granted! The wish is greasy. I wish for fried chicken

Banned for playing Destiny EDIT: forgot this was the cheaters thread

The poly neutronium is kind of heavy... I won't be using it for the main intergalactic fleet. Hmmm, I wonder what happens if we make a polyneutronium-duranium alloy... (mixes part of the sample and some scrap duranium together)

I take my remaining interstellar cruiser and take over all of Kepler 186's planets. I manufacture 10 intergalactic cruisers with chem lasers to protect Xannari's place from Dark Junior's havoc thing. EDIT: From far away of course, we don't want that Great Attractor being disturbed.

Banned for repetition