Attempt Kill-The-Next

[problemecium]

Unfortunately for you, I make sure to wear a skintight plastic suit at all times.

I release an EMP, wiping the hard drives of every computer in the world, except one which I had saved in an electrically-isolated underground vault. On it is installed the world's only remaining copy of Kerbal Space Program. I place the computer on the ground and dig a trench around it, which I fill with razor-sharp spikes... and I wait >

[MacGamer04]

I jump over the spikes, grab the computer, and run for my life. Thankfully, I'm a *decently* fast runner, and I manage to escape.

I place the computer in my *semi* secret base, and leave, cover the place in security cameras, and retreat to Siberia, where I watch the cameras, to see if anybody dares to come to the *semi* secret base...

[Xannari Ferrows]

I do the old freeze frame hack to keep your cameras frozen while I enter for as long as I please, and on your end, it looks nominal. I then remove said module, run out unscathed, and disable that freeze frame.

I will now check all of that data left in here...

[kreutzkevic]

"I AM the data! Your puny intellect is no match for my magnificent AI! Feel my wrath!"

I use all electrical power available to me to fire a high-voltage electrical arc in your direction...

[ComradeWolfe]

I use an electrode to harvest the power and feed it in to a giant windmill, running it in reverse and sucking you towards the blade.

[Xannari Ferrows]

As there is a center of rotation on the windmill, all I have to do use my natural lift to line myself up with it and land. Bingo, I'm safe.

I take 3 airburst arrow out, and aim them all at once towards the airstream. Since it is moving backwards, they will arc around the windmill and undoubtedly impale you, and _____.

Edited August 15, 2015 by Xannari Ferrows

[Dman979]

But my Phalanx anti-missile defense system shoots an almost solid stream of bullets at them and they go down.

Now I aim it at you!

[ComradeWolfe]

Before you even thought to get a Phalanx, I ensured that the manufacturer contract went to the lowest bidder. By the second volley, I think you will find it quite unable to fire.

I also renegotiated your health insurance and family doctor to the lowest bidders. You start to cough from what you think is just a cold -- but it isn't, and you'll never get the treatment you need.

[TARDISES]

Good luck with that then, Dman979. I am unaffected because of the choice of words used.

Here. Have a drill. A galaxy-sized drill.

*insert image of TTGL here*

[Yukon0009]

The drill is not pointed at me.

I take drill and throw it at next user.

[Noname117]

It turns out I also have my own personal galaxy sized drill blocking me, and it is a far stronger drill. My drill drills through your drill, saving me.

Using gravity assists, I manage to get all the debris of the drill flying straight towards the next user.

[TARDISES]

SIZE MODIFIERS ACTIVATE! Me = SS. TTGL-sized stuff = size infinity (no, really, that's what everything is at that point in Z3). Therefore... it's basically having a free Alert.

This means the Giga Drill debris merely misses me. Floating towards the next.

[windows_x_seven]

As the debris flew towards me, it had to cross a SoI. During that event, the almighty Space Kraken strikes, sending the debris to Kraken's Hell.

Some of that debris, however, was radioactive and hit a Dres Base filled with 69 kerbals. The kerbals are now zombies with LV-N rocket engines strapped on their backs.

They can understand orbital mechanics and are looking at you, next person.

[Xannari Ferrows]

I explain the actual definition of Zombies, and where they come from.

I order them to attack ______.

[windows_x_seven]

Using the finest Kerbal Hypnosis available, I hypnotize the zombies to ingest Liquid Fuel, gaze into the sky and press T, then Z.

The Zombie Kerbals are now doing orbital mechanics, and are coming for you, next user.

[Sampa]

I shrink,so small, i can hide anywhere i need to. The zombies mistake the next poster for me!

[Dark Junior]

BOOM, EXPLOSIVE SHOTGUN ROUNDS!

I fire thaleron radiation at the next poster.

(Star trek nemesis)

[Xannari Ferrows]

I change the amplitude of the 011 defense perimeter to match the inverse amplitude of the radiation, causing them to destructively interfere.

I then retaliate with a Terahelix ripple.

[Sampa]

Error 404 User not found!

Ripple hits next,user

[Xannari Ferrows]

As I am at the center of the ripple, all of the applied forces destructively interfere, and I remain safe.

I nag at ______ for not clearing his mailbox until he dies!

[Sampa]

Corrects the issue so the nagging stops.

The next person finds themselves on the receiving end of the wave motion gun

[TrainEngie]

I throw a mirror at it and I run.

I throw a broken piece of glass at ______.

[megatiger78]

helmets

I throw said helmet at someone, after stuffing it with C4

[TrainEngie]

I catch the helmet and the armed bombs. I wear the helmet and I throw the armed bombs at _______ before they detonate.

[TARDISES]

HUDDA HUDDA HUH! (The bombs get airblasted away)

MMPH MM-MM-MM MMPH! ("THAT POSTER'S A SPY!" Cue w+m1 to Spycheck)