Kerbal Death Note

[TwoCalories]

Linus Kerman was playing with the Offset Tool in the VAB while none of the engineers was looking when he accidentally locked the node to his head. He tried pulling it off, but he pulled the X-axis down, smashing him paper-thin instantly. The engineers came in and found a paper-thin Linus on the floor. They took him back to R&D while the KSC scientists figured out how to undo the Offset. One of the engineers suggested just using the Offset tool to restore him to 3D. However, at that moment a CS/T-77 trainer jet had a mechanical failure above the KSC and jettisoned its drop tanks as part of emergency procedures. The drop tank smashed into the R&D and right into 2D Linus.

Durnan Kerman: Trying to beat Jebediah Kerman to the Mun in an unplanned mission.

Edited June 14 by TwoCalories
new paaage

[Iapetus7342]

Linus was having a nice day on Efil, flying his handmade plane he built over the course of the week. He got permission from the KSC to begin flying, and did so from runway 09, bringing a recorder because why not. During his flight he passed over the infamous Sea of Ends, a large sea known for causing anyone who dared cross it to die in the most random means. Linus flew over the sea, too busy admiring the view, and was caught by the Kraken. The last photo in the recorder was from the perspective of a 2D organism, and a nearby light house recorded the following log:

LOG START 2040-02-24, 11:20AM LOCAL TIME

11:20: Anomaly detected over Sea of Ends

11:21: Distress signal received, denied due to extreme risk

11:21: Distress signal received, denied due to extreme risk

11:22: Distress signal received, denied with force

11:22: Severe vessel contortion detected

11:21: SySte m  F A iLrue

!!:£$: S G  L  OS 

END LOG

The lighthouse then saw Linus' plane, with him still in it, become 2D and disappear, before the Kraken returned to the murky depths of the Sea of Ends.

Spoiler

The Efil Coast Guard division discovered the remains of Linus and his plane the following day, with black box data revealing that Linus had disregarded warnings from the KSC about the Sea of Ends. Funerary sevices were promptly held and all access to the sea was forcefully revoked.

Varen Kerman: Falling into Kcalbeloh 

Edited June 14 by Iapetus7342
Oh dear, it appears someone already did it

[tryharder]

Durnan Kerman betted Jeb that he could build a better rocket and land it on the Mun before him. Jeb disagreed and challenged Durnan to a competition. The funny thing is that Durnan did indeed beat Jeb, and was just celebrating it on the surface of the Mun when Jeb landed his rocket. Straight on top of Durnan.

Jakey Kerman dies of old age while waiting 19 million years for his girlfriend to return from a space mission.

[Abel Military Services]

Jakey Kerman's girlfriend went on a trip to the edge of the observable universe, but when she decided to take the trip, Jakey was at North Kerbin to plan some conspiracies, so he didn't come. He waited and waited till death. 

Torres Kerman - Salvation

[Mars-Bound Hokie]

"A powerful boat, a powerful gun, powerful ammunition. Add to that lots of people and a precise aim! Then sprinkle death all over it, and the formula is complete!" Those were the closing words of the manifesto tape of Torres Kerman, an extremist who was once a captain of Marx's navy before his dishonorable discharge. 

He knew for years that Marx's government would not attack Squaddon first, despite being the capital of their geopolitical rival on Kerbin. So, Torres secretly funded the (now-defunct) shipbuilding company Changzheng to construct a one-man ballistic submarine called the S.M.G. Salvation. Some time after his discharge, his hidden funds were running dry and he heard from one of his old navy buddies that the Marxan police were on to his operation. Refusing to be stopped, he forced his way to the incomplete prototype and set sail. Though the submarine could navigate its way through the seas with excellence, its defense and missile launch systems were not ready yet - and the engineers had not yet labeled the buttons. Fearing a retaliatory strike in case Torres' plan succeeded, Marx's government warned Kerbin's air force about him and told them where to expect him.

After Torres had surfaced, he noticed dozens of fighters - Marxan Fishbeds among them - approaching him. The Salvation carried surface-to-air missiles, so he had expected to hold off the attackers long enough to fire without a hitch. However, since the engineers at Changzheng had not yet separated the weapons controls from the navigation systems, Torres lost his primary target every time he aimed to take out a plane. He then saw the big red encased button in the middle of the sub and punched it, hoping to prepare the missile for launch.

What he did not know was that it was the button to activate Salvation's self-destruct sequence. Although Torres did request that feature in order to avoid capture, that button had not yet been labeled and he did not know what it would look like.

• Many called it doubly ironic that Salvation, though meant to end millions of lives, ended up saving them instead by killing its captain and sole crewmember.

 

Wurmheller Kerman will be killed by a tesla weapon.

[Abel Military Services]

Wurmheller was an ace pilot of the KSC union, at least before defecting to "A world without Rockets". "A world without rockets" is an terrorist organization that aims to "Restart the space program" using nukes. Wurmheller was chosen as the pilot that will pilot the nuke-carrying F-15C. 

When he arrived at the Island Airspace, he found out a strange flying thing was flying towards him. Then the last thing he feel before the plane melted is a strong lightning noise. 

"Good job, Larry! " said the KSC union AWACS "Rocketeer".  "How was this experimental fighter plane be like? "

" Fine. " said Larry Kerman. 

Larry Kerman - Removing the boundaries.