Would humans benefit from having tails today?

[Tex]

Before I even start, I DO acknowledge that cases of human tails do exist. I have seen several cases, but they all share something in common: the "tails" are much more akin to a skin overgrowth than an extension of the spine. As far as I know, no documented (human) tails have any true purpose, as they cannot be controlled as a limb can.

Tails in the animal kingdom help to maintain balance, occasionally are used as weapons, and can be handy flyswatters. I was wondering what you guys think: Would modern humans benefit from having tails today?

Personally, I do not think tails are advantageous anymore, as homo sapiens is a bipedal construct, capable of maintaining balance on our own quite nicely. Plus, many modern conveniences would have to be redesigned: cars, office chairs, pants, underwear, and especially... toilets.

[relin]

Sports would be more interesting.

[magnemoe]

As I understand if you walk on two legs as humans do you don't need a tail for balance.

However an additional manipulator would be nice, imagine controlling an computer mouse without taking your hands off the keyboard.

Dilbert had an joke with this once, also other stuff who require less precision like throttle or gearing.

Do not see why toilets would not work, unlike many chairs its room enough on the back to swing it aside

[WhiteWeasel]

Chairs and clothes would have to be pretty much redesigned. Even so, I'd have one for novelty/vanity. If it's strong and fairly dexterous, it would be (even if superficial) helpful for carrying things, possibly fights, and what not. Good thing I'm under 20, hopefully I will live long enough to see advanced genetic engineering.

[Kerbin Dallas Multipass]

The word "*****" is taken from the Latin word for "tail." Some derive that from Indo-European *pesnis, and the Greek word Àέο = "*****" from Indo-European *pesos. Prior to the adoption of the Latin word in English the ***** was referred to as a "yard".

I googled this for a tail joke.

I feel quite inadequate now.

Yard.

WTF.

[nhnifong]

People would have better posture if they didn't slouch. Tails would sort of keep you from slouching, lest you uncomfortably smush your tail bones into your back.

[Seret]

Well, the five people that voted "yes" just outed themselves as furries.

[Thiel]

Well, the five people that voted "yes" just outed themselves as furries.

Given how little body hair humans have I doubt it would be a furry tail.

As for utility, I don't really see it. As has been pointed out before we're keeping our balance just fine, and since we evolved as steppe animals I doubt any tail that might have evolved with us would have been prehensile.

At best we might have gotten something like a naked cat tail. The limited motor skill cats display with their tails suggests it would have been pretty terrible for using tools though, and given the lack of long bones to provide leverage for the muscles it wouldn't have been particularly strong either.

[magnemoe]

Given how little body hair humans have I doubt it would be a furry tail.

As for utility, I don't really see it. As has been pointed out before we're keeping our balance just fine, and since we evolved as steppe animals I doubt any tail that might have evolved with us would have been prehensile.

At best we might have gotten something like a naked cat tail. The limited motor skill cats display with their tails suggests it would have been pretty terrible for using tools though, and given the lack of long bones to provide leverage for the muscles it wouldn't have been particularly strong either.

Cat tails are for balance only unlike monkey tails so they don't need to be very bendable.

However I guess it would not be very strong, think the tails in avatar looked pretty realistic view in how it would work on humans.

[MC.STEEL]

Well, the five people that voted "yes" just outed themselves as furries.

Oh **** you blew my cover

ABORT

ABORT

but on a more serious note: tails can be very usefull like showing emotion it could be used just for decoration or even a 5th limb(i personaly would put my keyring on it when theres no danger of them being stolen).

On a purely anatomical stand point "furry" phisiology is vastly superior to the stock "human" body

Edited January 9, 2014 by MC.STEEL

[NASAFanboy]

Yes. It would be nice.

Until you slam a door on it.

[lajoswinkler]

If the tail has a vertebra in it... No, thanks. There are too many ways in which you can get hurt and if the microbes get into the wound, they could crawl up your spinal fluid into your brain and kill you.

Handy muscular appendage? That would be great. No danger of spinal injury, brain inflammation.

I always wanted to be able to do this.

I think certain Japanese comic books would look a lot more different if we had tails...

[Klingon Admiral]

If humans would have had any advantage from a tail, we would have one. As the tail loss of hominoids is a secondary feature, and thus nature selected specifically for individuals with increasingly shorter tails, there are none.

[lajoswinkler]

If humans would have had any advantage from a tail, we would have one. As the tail loss of hominoids is a secondary feature, and thus nature selected specifically for individuals with increasingly shorter tails, there are none.

True, but at this moment, evolution is not straightforward, it's very slow and the things we've done with out society are much faster than the selection.

We look pretty much like the beings selected tens of thousands of years ago, if you don't account for our energetic nutrition.

Nowdays, with all the massive work we do each day, having a third hand would come in handy (pun not intended).

[Raven.]

No, they would not. And if we did have tails, they would serve no purpose. Our inner ears already provides balance control.

[lajoswinkler]

Dude, if it makes possible holding a cup and occasionally sipping a drink while you're typing something, it's useful.

I'm talking about prehensile tails.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prehensile_tail

I can think of dozens of different useful purposes for such appendage.

[Deadpangod3]

Wait so cats tails are for stability? I thought they had enough already, I mean, FOUR LEGS! Wouldn't that be more stable then two?

I'm so cornfused...

[Ralathon]

Wait so cats tails are for stability? I thought they had enough already, I mean, FOUR LEGS! Wouldn't that be more stable then two?

I'm so cornfused...

Cats tend to catch prey by jumping. The tail act as a rudder and a place to dump angular momentum.

Anyway, a good prehensile tail would be pretty cool to have. You could probably mod your mouse so you could operate it with the tail and you could keep both your hands on the keyboard for typing and keybinds. Sounds pretty useful for today's world.

[Deadpangod3]

Cats tend to catch prey by jumping. The tail act as a rudder and a place to dump angular momentum.

Anyway, a good prehensile tail would be pretty cool to have. You could probably mod your mouse so you could operate it with the tail and you could keep both your hands on the keyboard for typing and keybinds. Sounds pretty useful for today's world.

Then why does it always wiggle around and stuff?

Edit: even while not in flight?

[Themohawkninja]

Yes. It would be nice.

Until you slam a door on it.

That hurts my non-existent tail just thinking about it.

That being said, I would like a tail under two conditions: (A) Flexible enough to wrap around my body, and ( Strong enough to support my body weight.

[Ralathon]

Then why does it always wiggle around and stuff?

Edit: even while not in flight?

Cats often use it to express emotions via body language as well. For example, if they swish the whole tail they usually mean "I'm not in the mood, leave me alone". If they keep it straight up they are happy.

[lajoswinkler]

Wait so cats tails are for stability? I thought they had enough already, I mean, FOUR LEGS! Wouldn't that be more stable then two?

I'm so cornfused...

It even helps, but only a bit (it's more about the flexing of the whole body) when they're dropped from a certain height, legs up.

It's more useful for jumping and walking on fences and stuff like that.

As for the emotion, here's a helpful table.

Males also quiver their tales when they urinate around their teritory.

Cats tend to catch prey by jumping. The tail act as a rudder and a place to dump angular momentum.

Anyway, a good prehensile tail would be pretty cool to have. You could probably mod your mouse so you could operate it with the tail and you could keep both your hands on the keyboard for typing and keybinds. Sounds pretty useful for today's world.

You are a genius.

[Deadpangod3]

Cats often use it to express emotions via body language as well. For example, if they swish the whole tail they usually mean "I'm not in the mood, leave me alone". If they keep it straight up they are happy.

Then how come my cats tails are almost always swishing, even when I'm petting them and stuff,

My cats love me, if you put me in a room with a cat and fifty other people the cat will come straight to me

[Thiel]

Dude, if it makes possible holding a cup and occasionally sipping a drink while you're typing something, it's useful.

I'm talking about prehensile tails.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prehensile_tail

I can think of dozens of different useful purposes for such appendage.

As far as I'm aware the only creatures that have anything that approach prehensile tails all live in trees or on rocks. Human beings evolved on the steppes of Africa where there's far more advantage to be gained from standing tall. Something a prehensile tail would have made harder to do, due to the way it would impact the spine and pelvis.

Also, a tail capable off supporting your entire bodyweight would have been absolutely massive.

[lajoswinkler]

Then how come my cats tails are almost always swishing, even when I'm petting them and stuff,

My cats love me, if you put me in a room with a cat and fifty other people the cat will come straight to me

Maybe they have psychological issues.

As far as I'm aware the only creatures that have anything that approach prehensile tails all live in trees or on rocks. Human beings evolved on the steppes of Africa where there's far more advantage to be gained from standing tall. Something a prehensile tail would have made harder to do, due to the way it would impact the spine and pelvis.

Also, a tail capable off supporting your entire bodyweight would have been absolutely massive.

Yes, those tails were not needed for humans living in those conditions, so they never had them, and they lost whatever tails they had earlier.

But as I've said, evolution has almost stopped right now. What we're doing is, our whole lives, it's all artificial. Even if there is an evolutionary pressure for humans to gain tails, such phenotypes will not be expressed through series of mutations and selection, simply because straightforward evolution has ceased to exist. Partner selection is quite individual, the uniformity is largerly lost.