You know you're a noob in KSP when...

[xrayfishx]

You know you're a noob when you use the "straight up to 10k then 45 degrees" launch profile instead of a nice, smooth eastwards pitch program. Which reminds me, you're a noob when you call pitch program a gravity turn (that's actually arguable - it is possible to go a long way in this forum without ever seeing a post explaining what the gravity turn really is, or what it isn't).

[Ossha]

You crash on the Mun , because you tried to use your parachutes...

[DBT85]

When despite your apparent experience, this happens on your first mission in a new career.

[Captain Sierra]

You crash on the Mun , because you tried to use your parachutes...

When despite your apparent experience, this happens on your first mission in a new career.

Guilty on both accounts at some point in time, the latter more recently than I'll consciously admit.

When you try to transfer to a body by aiming straight at it and blasting the engines (i.e. my first munar attempt in the demo, before I knew what hohmann transfers and phase angles were).

[InterCity]

when your rocket has a minimal TWR over 2.5

[Tyrred]

...When you spend days designing a ridonculous asteroid interceptor spaceship, maneuver to intercept retrograde to it's Kerbin impact trajectory, rendezvous and Klaw to it using FOUR AGU's (hey, the more the merrier, no?)... And then realize that despite an entire suite of scientific instruments, all you can do is EVA and get a surface sample from high space, low space, and in atmosphere, then hang on for dear life as you ride it down to impact. Because your main engines are pointed the same way as your Klaws and cannot redirect jack because they are blocked by... An asteroid!

Edited January 5, 2015 by Tyrred

[Dr-Drunk]

When you spend 3 days on the forums complaining about not being able to mine water using the KSPI ISRU, only to find out the reason the damn thing didn't work was because I forgot to include a water tank.... Derp....

[DBT85]

Guilty on both accounts at some point in time, the latter more recently than I'll consciously admit.

I did it myself this morning. lol.

So annoying that it does it automatically too.Even with an empty stage under the capsule, it will still add the SRB to stage 0!

[CrazyJebGuy]

You finally work up the courage to try for a duna mission... You use the same vehicle you used to get to the Mun

DON"T JUDGE ME

Alacrity

Seriously, I'm using my first mun rocket (modified over time) as an interplanetary one. But It is a lot like the original. Don't judge me yet. It has 17000 delta V in vacume. And I wondered if it could get to the Mun! (I didn't have Mechjeb then)

[PB666]

LV-Ns work well on non-atmospheric planets. I have kerbin launches that combine LV-N with SRBs. Halfway through gravity turn they're a competive choice.

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I would say do a Duna flyby because you failed to consider that stock ION drives lack sufficient thrust to retrograde to a planetary orbit.

[Red Iron Crown]

LV-Ns work well on non-atmospheric planets. I have kerbin launches that combine LV-N with SRBs. Halfway through gravity turn they're a competive choice.

LV-Ns are competitive everywhere but Eve. On Duna and airless bodies they far outclass chemicals in efficiency, on Kerbin they surpass the best chemicals in efficiency by 1700m or so (likely at a lower altitude on Laythe but I haven't run the numbers).

[Bill Phil]

When you pick anyone but Jeb...

or if you only pick Jeb.

[Peebothuhlu]

You take your rover out of the SPH into the VAB. Build an 'experimental' rocket stack under it and it makes orbit....

... Then wonder what to do with a wheeled vehicle in orbit with no parachutes... or maneuvering thrusters or anything 'fly-able'...

[PB666]

you can land on the Mun without circularisng, NerdCubed did it.

Done it, easy, just make sure you correct trajectory within an hour of landing as to target a meteor crater (or have good wide-set gear).

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...When you realise that you put the decoupler upside down and can't use your engine.

This one, I was about 2 months into the game before I realized that the decoupler had an arrow on it, lol. After the 1st week I only used separators and it took a long time to trust those decouplers again.

- - - Updated - - -

You use mechjeb.

MechJeb

1. Remote Guidance Unit (Physicless) = justification enough to use on all jettisoned utilities (such as a fuel tank with a dock that can be used by craft to refuel) tank, solar panel, dock port and MechJeb = refueling station.

2. Much better in docking guidance relative to stock. Target mode +Target and -Rel. The speed of adjusting target orientation relative to manual all by itself is noteworthy.

3. Suicide burn count down.

Enough said, even if you know everything there is to know about space flight, you can still benefit from these utilities

Add to these. . . . .

Precision transfers because you can precisely match orbital planes (+/-NML feature). So for example you can hit the SOI of a floating snowball called Eeloo close to Apo from an orbital burn out of Moho without having to make a single midtransfer correction.

[panzer1b]

When u enable infinite fuel and still fail to get where you needed to get..........

I actually had that happen in the old days before i had a clue that you dont burn straight at a target (didnt know jack bout orbital mechanics, and assumed it was like in the movies where spacecraft just fly headon towards the target). those were the days lol, and ofc the number of dead kerbals and explosions was rather high.....

That, ohh and the insane number of times i started braking too late and crashed into a planet/mun/ship.

And then ive had a coupke times where i made the best most badass ship, get it up there, only to realize i forgot to bring enough reaction wheels/RCS to actually do anything with it.

Edited January 30, 2015 by panzer1b

[Sidereus]

When you visit the Jool system and spontaneously decide to land on Tylo. You will not be prepared!

I, uh, may have done that a couple days ago...

Does the fact that I successfully landed on Bop and Pol with the same lander prior to attempting Tylo mitigate my newbishness any? Or does the fact that I was using an ion engine make it worse?

[Starhawk]

When you go to Minmus without using maneuver nodes. 'Cause you didn't know they existed.

[Lhathron the Elf]

When you are wondering why you can't attach anything to the aerospike rocket. (Been there, done that. )

[Venusgate]

When you go to Minmus without using maneuver nodes. 'Cause you didn't know they existed.

probably the first 75 hours of my ksp experience, I didn't know about maneuvering nodes (pushing 500 now)

[Delrey]

My first attempt at docking I had the ports facing the wrong way. No docking alignment mod, just eyeballing it. Turns out that was very good practice because my next attempt I docked like a champ

[Venusgate]

You find out your awesome plan to parachute down to Mun's surface might have some bugs to work out.... at 5km and 500m/s.

4km and 475m/s....

3km and 452m/s....

[cptdavep]

When you've spent hours getting your rescue ship to Duna orbit, spend hours more trying to rendezvous and when you finally make it repeatedly bump your docking port Snr up against the standard docking port on the other ship.

[Alchemist]

When your rescue craft lands worse than the original lander...

Also this:

- KSC to Munbase Alpha. It were you who ordered a new module, right?

- Munbase Alpha to KSC. Affirmative.

- Good news: it will arrive in a minute.

- Acknowledged. Thank you.

- Bad news: it's ran out of fuel. You'd better hide under a table or somewhere

[Zuqq]

When you think you can send a crew of 5 to Moho, and they end up leaving the solar system.

[Anister]

When you send a rescue mission to save 1 kerbal, and send another one to save 2, and another one to save 3, etc etc