Quasar

---------------------------------------------------------- Episode 7: Massively Mining Minmus ----------------------------------------------------------

---------------------------------------------------------- Episode 6: The Gilly Garbage Pile (Part 2: The Eve System) ----------------------------------------------------------

---------------------------------------------------------- Episode 6: The Gilly Garbage Pile (Part 1: Launch and LKO) ----------------------------------------------------------

------------------------------------------ Episode 5: Fixer Upper ------------------------------------------

------------------------------------------ Episode 4: The Minmus Mishap ------------------------------------------

------------------------------------------ Episode 3: Scientific Stupidity ------------------------------------------

---------------------------------------------------------------------- Episode 2: The Tourist Terrorization ----------------------------------------------------------------------

This thread will log my comedic misadventures in a new career game. I've been playing on normal difficulty and cautiously using rescue missions and small science trips to work my way up to the point where I can let loose the dogs of stupidity and completely ruin everything for everyone, forever. In universe, the space program has recently hired a new, somewhat more eccentric director after the previous one... ahem... disappeared. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Episode 1: The Munmus Tour Episode 2: Tourist Terrorization Episode 3: Scientific Stupidity Episode 4: The Minmus Mishap Episode 5: Fixer Upper Episode 6: The Gilly Garbage Pile (Part 1) (Part 2) Episode 7: Massively Mining Minmus (Part 1) (Part 2) Episode 8: Saving Samald Episode 9: Saving Samald again. Also Johnuki (Part 1) (Part 2) Episode 10: Duna Comm Network Episode 11: Babies First Duna Mission Episode 12: Mining Minmus More Massivelier (Part 1) (Part 2) Episode 13: Coming Home Party Episode 14: Duna Superstation (Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) Episode 14.5: Gene launches some boring Mapping Probes Episode 15: SSTO's (Part 1) (Part 2) Episode 16: Monstrous Mun Station Episode 17: The Abominable Asteroid Episode 18: Horrible Habitats (Part 1) (Part 2) Episode 19: A Dreadful Dres Landing ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Episode 1: The Munmus Tour ----------------------------------------------------------------------

"If this end starts pointing toward space you are having a bad problem and you will not go to space today." Your challenge: build a multi-stage rocket that flips upside down between every stage, for reasons that presumably made sense to the mission planners at the time. To qualify, your rocket: * Must be made from stock parts and flown manually. No MechJeb. * Must activate at least 4 stages before reaching orbit. * Your stage 1 engines must be pointing down, your stage 2 engines must be pointing up, and so on. Your rocket must flip once between every stage in order to qualify. Rockets will be scored on a "payload-mass-divided-by-cost" basis, but feel free to do the challenge without numbers. These are... unlikely to be the most cost-effective rockets anybody has ever launched. I have verified that this challenge is achievable by launching a mobile lab and mk3 capsule into orbit in the center of a 4-stage rocket stack. (twinboar, mainsail, mainsail, poodle). Had to briefly fire the first mainsail downwards to help me flip in the atmosphere, but otherwise an uneventful launch. Will provide screenshots later.

Okay, everyone can stop panicking now. I found a slightly bigger rock and am in the process of solving my fuel problem. Aint no problem that can't be solved by crashing it into Minmus.

Epilogue 2 Asicca: "Umm... I think there's a problem..." Hainy: "Overheating? I told them we needed radiators, but would they listen? No. No they would not." Asicca: "No chief, the heat is managable... barely. But... I think we're out." Hainy: "Out?" Asicca: "Out of ore." Bob: "What? We can't be. This thing's a D-class asteroid. It was 94% ore before we started mining. I checked myself." Asicca: "Did you check the mass?" Bob: "No, why?" Asicca: "It's 14 tons." Bob: "... you mean 140 tons, right? Asicca: "Nope." Bob: "That can't be right. I mean, we're 307 tons. It's an enormous rock, you can't tell me it weighs less than 5% of what we do. Asicca: "I think I just did." Bob: "Wow. We should be making spaceships out of asteroid rock." Asicca: "So.. does this mean we're stranded now? Because we used most of our remaining fuel to get out here." Valentina: "Yep." Asicca: "... [sigh]... I wonder what it would be like to be part of a competent space program?" Valentina: "Uh, boring? Duh."

My entry: Dartwing 1 Flies surprisingly well. Very sensitive, but it's a small plane so that's to be expected. Putting Valentina inside the air intake didn't have any negative effects whatsoever, contrary to what action movies would tell you. It weighs 0.905t Unkerballed, or 1.005t including pilot. I managed the island run in 3 minutes 42 seconds. Could probably have shaved a few seconds off that if I'd blown the parachute lower. (would also have been faster if I could have started Valentina in the pilot's seat, but (shrug). 50 + (1.005 * (-3)) + (3.7 * (-1)) = 43.285

Epilogue Science: In total, we recovered 10,080 science on this mission, which is (a) insane and (b) will come in handy to fill out some of my extended tech tree. I'm especially looking forward to unlocking the "Experimental Rocketry" and "Gigantic Rocketry" tabs, because of course I am. Funds: We did pretty well (by my standards) monetarily: we didn't quite do the mission at a loss, and managed a profit margin of 30.7%. Starting = 2,503,852 Spent = 2,430,956 (Shub Niggurath) + 108,564 (Quisling 1) Total Spent = 2,539,520 Gained = 3,321,153 (Missions and World Firsts) Profit = 781,633 Ending Funds = 3,285,485 Crew: No casualties, and we now have 6 new five-star Kerbals (2 scientists, 2 engineers and 2 pilots). The A-Team are Valentina, Asicca, Bob, Henfield, Hainy and Danny. Everyone else is now four-star. Infrastructure: 1x Duna Ultrabase, with science rover and crew shuttle. 1x Ike Refueling Base, with landing pad and refueler 1x Eldritch Abomination/Interplanetary Tug Overall Mission Rating:

Radio: [static] "[kksshhhh kklick]... ah, Shub Niggurath! I was wondering when you'd get back. Did you complete the mission?" Asicca: "Buh? Control? Good to hear from you! Where's Gene?" Radio: "Gene is currently... indisposed. How went the mission? Did you bring back the parts?" Asicca: "... everything's fine, control. Mission successful, lots of science, but we ran out of Oxidiser before we could dock with KSC." Radio: "Out of oxidiser? Okay, that's fine. We've prepared a recovery vessel to bring you and the cargo home. Control out." The radio went silent. Asicca: "... well that's not good." ------ [later, in the crew compartment] Asicca: "Guys, I think someone's trying to steal our magic launch clamp." Valentina: "Ooh, this sounds interesting. Why do you think that?" Asicca: "The voice on the radio wasn't Gene or Qu. have you ever heard *anybody* except one of those two giving the orders at mission control? Oh, and he also said Gene was "indisposed"." Danny: "Oooh, ouch. Yeah, that's definately villain talk. They teach you that in evil school. That means he's dead." [collective gasp from the crew] Danny: "... or... tied up in the basement, if you prefer? I mean, anything's possible." ---- Meanwhile, tied up in the basement of Kerbal Space Center. Gene: "I told you not to let them in!" Qu: "They said they had cookies!" Gene: "They were wearing balaclava's and carrying weapons!" Qu: "They had trustworthy voices." Gene: "I hate you so much." Suddenly the door clangs open. A huge, buff kerbal with a hood over his head walks in and towers over the prisoners menacingly. He slowly pulls something out from behind his back... Hoodded Kerbal: "Here. I got you the cookies you asked for." Qu: "Oh wow, chocolate chip! See, Gene? These guys aren't so bad." Gene: "We are currently tied up in the basement and they have taken over the Space Center! Those cookies are probably poisoned or something!" Qu: [munch munch] "Well if you don't want any..." Gene: "I didn't say that." ------ Back aboard the Stubby-Niggurath.... Valentina: "Okay then, so... this is bad. What do we do?" Bob: "Well the good news is, they probably will send up a recovery ship like they said. They wouldn't have promised that if they didn't have anything ready. Our people must have left something on the launch pad before they took over." Valentina: "Okay, but they'll control it, so if we board it it'll land us at their headquarters, and next thing you know we're in some dark room with electrodes on all our sensitive bits." Bob: "Eep." Kertrid: "Um... thank you for that poignant mental image, Commander, but I think it's probably safe to hop aboard the recovery ship. They're not interested in us, they just want the device. So that makes it our job to keep it from them and get it safely to... lemme see... the rightful owners are Kerman & Kerman Orbit and Surface Structures." Valentina: "Alright. Idea's, anyone?" Danny: "Why don't we just let them have it?" [silence] Danny: "What? Somebody's got to suggest these things. And you all know I'm evil now so it might as well be me. Stop giving me that look!" Asicca: "I think I have a better idea. Commander, do you think the clamp will follow us if we go on EVA?" Valentina: "Ooh, let's find out!" ------ Valentina: "Hi there, clampy! Wanna come with me? Valentina: "Yay, it's following me! Where to now?" Asicca: "Excellent! Can you take it over to Kerbin Space Station?" Valentina: "Oooooh, now I see where you're going with this..." Valentina: "Whoa! Hey cool! I have super-strength!" Asicca: "You what?" Valentina: "I accidentally bumped the space station on the way in and sent it spinning!" Bob: "Oh... oh! I get it now, that's how it's moving! It's transferring it's mass to you, rendering it effectively massless and resulting in it staying in your reference frame! It's a mass negating drive!" Asicca: "No, wait, that doesn't make sense. If had more mass, it would take more thrust to move. We'd have noticed that." Bob: "Not if our fuel was also increasing in mass. Same amount of relative thrust. No wonder they want it!" Asicca: "That's... actually really cool. What about the teleporting though?" Bob: "Oh yeah, the teleporting..." [shrug] "Yeah, no idea." Valentina: "You nerds done nerding yet? I've sent a message to Kerman and Kerman and I'm heading off now. Oh, and I think the bad guys are contacting you..." ------ Radio: "Mission Control to Shub Niggurath. The Quisling 1 is enroute. I'll ask you to transfer both mission critical parts to it when it arrives, then board and prepare for re-entry." Bob: "Affirmative mission control. We will do exactly what you say and absolutely nothing else." Radio: "That's... an odd way to phrase that, but okay." [ksht] Kertrid: "I see the recovery craft. Starboard." Hayemma: "Oh cool, it's got a mining rig! We'll be able to refuel Shubby from asteroids." Asicca: "Oh thank god." Bob: "Alright then. It's coming in to dock. I'll grab the experiments. Everyone get ready to board." [some time later] Bob: "Okay control, we're ready for deorbit." Radio: "I'm sorry, crew? I thought there was another part? And why hasn't Valentina Kerman boarded?" Valentina: [ksshhh!] "HA HAAAH!" Valentina: "You idiots! You thought you could trick us, but we saw right through your disguise!" Radio: "What? Dammit! You knew?!" Valentina: "Ha ha yes! As we speak, I am re-entering the atmosphere aboard a KSS escape pod! Kerman and Kerman already knows our projected flightpath! They'll be there long before you can organise a recovery effort!" Valentina: "You'll never get your eeeeevil hands on this launch clamp!" Radio: "Wait, what? Launch clamp?" Valentina: "Yes! The... magic launch clamp... you're trying to steal?" Radio: "Why on Kerbin would we want to steal a stupid launch clamp?" Valentina: "Uhh... what?" Radio: "And you call us idiots. We're not after that. We want..." Radio: "... THE DOOMSDAY BOOSTER!" Valentina: "... oh. Guys, I think we screwed up." Asicca: "Ya think?" Radio: "Yes! With THE DOOMSDAY BOOSTER in our possession, we will ransom the Kerbal government for all the funds!!" Bob: "All the funds?" Radio: "ALL THE FUNDS!!! And if we don't get them we will BOOST THE PLANET INTO THE SUN!!!!!" Bob: "I'm pretty sure that's not even plausible..." Radio: "MWAHAHAHAHAHAH! But before we do that, we will land you all at our headquarters, put you in a dark room and attach electrodes to all your s-" Asicca: "Okay, that's quite enough of that. I'm afraid you're not getting the booster either." Radio: "Enough bluffing! Your plan has failed! You are already being de-orbited! We have balaclava's and also guns! You cannot hope to win!" Radio: "We will get THE DOOMSDAY BOOSTER and there's nothing you, or any Kerbal, can do to stop us!" Asicca: [snigger] "Oh this is priceless." Hayemma: "Perfect timing! I see the cavalry on radar, boss. Coming in fast." Radio: "What?!" Asicca: "Everyone brace for impact!" [WHAM] Radio: "What? No no NOOO!" Turtle: "Your orders, mistress?" Asicca: "Quick, quick! Say "I am no kerbal" as loudly as possible." Turtle: "I AM NO KERBAL!" Asicca: "Okay that was fun. Turtle, if you could just deorbit us over the HQ of Moving Parts Experts Group... we've got a delivery for them." Turtle: "Certainly, mistress. It is a pleasure to serve." Radio: "CURSE YOU ASICCA KERMAN! CUUUURRSEE YOOOOU!" ------ Gene: "Mission Control to Shub-Nig-" Qu: [munch] [munch] "Hey guys!" Bob: "Gene! Qu! You're alive! What happened down there?" Qu: [munch] [munch] "They ran away. Even let us keep the cookies!" Asicca: "How'd you escape?" Qu: "Gene gnawed through the rope." Gene: "That wasn't an escape attempt, I was just starving. You wouldn't let me have any of the cookies!" Asicca: "Well, it's a relief to hear you are all alive. Could we ask a favor?" Gene: "What do you need?" Asicca: "We've got a solid rocket booster... that is apparently also some sort of doomsday device? ... sticking through our heat shield. Could you run some simulations?" Qu: "The booster is a doomsday device? I knew it!" Asicca: "Uh, those simulations? It's kind of urgent." Qu: "Yeah yeah, gimme a sec..." [munch] [munch]... "okay, don't worry. Situation is nominal." Joevey: "Oh god we're all going to die." Qu: "Nah, you're fine. A bit of spinning during re-entry..." Asicca: "How much spinning?" Qu: "Relax. Not too much." Qu: "You don't actually have anything to worry about anything until the parachutes open." Asicca: "Uh... what's going to happen when-" Asicca: "... the parachutes open?" Qu: "Oh just hang on to something, you'll be fine." ------ Everyone: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" Asicca: "EJECT THE HEATSHIELD! EJECT THE HEATSHIELD!" Joevey: "I"M TRYING! I CAN'T... REACH... THE BUTTON..." [Kthunk] Everyone: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" Asicca: "IT DIDN'T STOP SPINNING!" Joevey: "I NOTICED!" [Vwoosh] Asicca: "Okay, who threw up all over the cabin? Fess up." Bob: "... I think literally all of us did." Asicca: "Yeah. Yeah I can believe that." Asicca: "But we're alive. That's what matters, right? KSC, we're alive and ready to be recovered. Bring a towel, please." ------ A successful mission, and enough science to collapse under it's own gravity! But I can't help but feel like I've forgotten about something in all the excitement... ------ [several days later] ... oh that's right. Valentina. We recovered a bored and somewhat grumpy Valentina from the ocean, and asked her where the launch clamp ended up. She pointed upwards. The clamp itself had stopped moving 1200m above the surface. Sadly I was unable to recover it from that position, so I simply edited the save to register it as landed. I suppose I could have flown some sort of grabby plane out to it, but by this stage I was done with it. Even if I had been able to grab it, I'm pretty sure it was 'fixed' to Kerbin by this stage, so I wouldn't have been able to move it. Kerman and Kerman can work out how to bring it home themselves.

Really? When I did my first few mun missions I was incapable of landing without it. SAS didn't have a retrograde option back then, though. Wheels within wheels.

One last thing before we settle in: refuelling the shuttle. I ended up going back to the newbie landing method of pointing upwards and using RCS translation to control my horizontal velocity. Haven't had to do that for a while, but it's a useful technique to remember: "point retrograde and burn" works well for general landings, but when you're aiming for a specific location, RCS translation can be very worthwhile. ------ And that's that. Time to await the transfer window back to Kerbin. There are a few incidents during the next 250 days, but nothing really woth mentioning. Hellgate, water zombies, Bob somehow stranding himself on the other side of Duna and having to walk back... oh, and Danny revealed himself as an agent of the Dark Lord K'thraken and promptly betrayed us and tried to kill everyone. Luckily Daphdolin in turn revealed herself as an android spy and saved us with magic android powers, and we worked together to stop him blah blah power of friendship, etc etc the end. You know, the usual. ------ When we last saw Stub-Niggurath and the LARCIS, they were on an elliptical orbit: their periapsis was low over Duna, but their apoapsis was out near Ike. Should be easy to meet up with them as they... pass... over... Goddammit Ike. Okay, this could have been a lot worse. Ike could have ejected them out of Duna's SoI. This is at least still managable: the shuttle has nuclear engines for a reason. But first, we should collect the LARCIS again. We've still got plenty of time before the transfer window and there's no rush, so it really won't take much delta-V to meet up with... ... it's going to collide with Ike on it's next orbit, isn't it? Yep! I knew it! Screw you, Ike! My magic launch clamp isn't crashing into you today. Stub-Niggurath collects the LARCIS and burns out to just outside Ikes orbit. The shuttle will join them there. ------ Eventually it's time to head home. We'll launch with 50 days to spare, just in case. Bob trudges over the horizon, gasping desperately for water, looking haggard and starved, just in time to join us. Oi Bob, good timing, we could use some help. Get over here and load the experiments. There's a lot of them. 99, to be exact. I can see the code. Alright, next, load up the crew! Oh, and someone grab Danny, he's still tied up and gagged under the rover. Valentina: "Alright, everyone ready? Let's go home. Five... Four... Three... Two... One..." Valentina: "I feel like I'm forgetting something. Did I leave the stove on?" Hayemma: "You didn't leave the stove on." Valentina: "Are you sure I didn't leave the stove on? We could go back to check." Hayemma: "Don't you dare!" The rendezvous goes according to plan (well something had to eventually), and Dunashugah docks with Stubby-Niggurath... ... at which point, Asicca notices something. Asicca: "Oh no. Commander, did you forget to fold up the shuttles solar panels before we launched?" Valentina: "I knew I forgot something!" Asicca: "Looks like the wind tore them off. Yeesh. We're lucky we had enough battery power to rendezvous." Valentina: "Can you fix it?" Asicca: "Yeah. I'll take some of the extraneous panels from the tug. Won't have quite the same SAS power as before, but it should still function." Not long later, after the crew transfers to Stubby's crew module, and they rendevouz with the LARCIS... Valentina: "There it is! Isn't it neat?" Asicca: "That makes no sense. It just... makes no sense whatsoever." Bob: "Welcome to my world." Valentina: "Alright, everyone. Apparently it's go time. Let's do this thing!" Asicca: "How is it even keeping up with us? It's a launch clamp! I mean look, it doesn't even have engines... HOLY excrements!" Asicca: "IT TELEPORTED! IT ACTUALLY TELEPORTED! DID YOU SEE THAT? HOW DID IT-" Bob: "Asicca. Relax." Asicca: "But- it- you- why doesn't the world make sense anymore?!" Bob: "Just don't question it. Trust me, it's better that way." Asicca: "I hate everything right now." Bye Duna! ------- Kerbol's SoI... Asicca: "Argh! I don't get it, I just don't... I've gone over this thing with a fine toothed comb. It's a launch clamp. It's a perfectly ordinary launch clamp. It's freaking me out." Bob: "What about the gas it's emitting?" Asicca: "What gas- OH MY GOD IS IT SUPPOSED TO BE DOING THAT?" Hayemma: "Is it going to blow up?" Joevey: "It better not blow up! That thing's worth a lot of money." Bob: "I'd be more worried about it blowing us up. There must be a lot of energy in that thing to follow us the way it does." Asicca: "WHAT?!" Danny: "... dooomed..." Valentina: "Who took his gag off?" Bob: "Oh, looks like the gas stopped. I guess we're safe then?" Valentina: "Sure, let's go with that." ------- Kerbin's SoI... Joevey: "Ready to perform braking burn. Ladies and gentlemen, please keep your hands and feet inside the craft at all times." Bob: "We survived. We're home. Or at least in the home system." Asicca: "Oh yeah. Man, I'll be glad to get down to Kerbin, have a shower, forget about that damn blue thing. I swear it's been creeping me out on purpos- AARGH!" Asicca: "DON'T! DO THAT! Bloody... box thing..." Joevey: "Okay, ladies and gentlemen. We are now in a stable polar orbit." Bob: "A polar... wait, what? Aren't we aiming for an equatorial orbit?" Valentina: "Oh yeah...back when we we're leaving Duna I kinda forgot to correct our incoming orbit, so this is going to be all sorts of inefficient." Bob: [sigh] "Okay, I get it. Fine. Just... do the plane shift then, Henfield, and then lower our periapsis. We're aiming for Kerbin International Space Station." Valentina: "Hey! I'm still in charge. I should be giving the orders." Bob: "Well technically, Ground Control is in charge now that we're back in Kerbin's Sphere of Influence." Asicca: "Hey, that's right! We don't have to listen to you anymore!" Valentina: "Pff. You know you love me." Joevey: "Performing the Plane Shift, sir." Bob: "... actually, it's odd that they haven't called. We should probably try to get a message through." Joevey: "Lowering our periapsis now." Bob: "Shub-Niggurath to ground control. Shub-Niggurath to ground control! Come in ground control. Do you read me?" [static] Asicca: "... no response? That's weird. Our transmitter must not me working. Gimme a sec to fix it?" Bob: "Okay." Joevey: "One more burn for rendezvous with Kerbin International Space Station." Asicca: "... uh... guys? Our transmitter is fine. Whatever the problem is... I don't think it's on our end." Bob: "Okay, now I'm starting to freak out." Valentina: "Eh, don't worry, I'm sure control just blew a fuse or forgot to pay the power bill." Asicca: "Good point. It's probably that. I'm sure it's fine." Joevey: "We're now within 7 kilometers of the station. Closing in n-" [kkkkkk] Joevey: "Oh, that's not good." Valentina: "What's not good? Joevey: "I think... I think we're out of oxidizer." Asicca: "Oh no. Docking will be near impossible without Oxidizer. Commander? What do we do?" Valentina: "Oh now you want me in charge?" Asicca: "Commander." Valentina: "Fine. We're in the same orbit as KSS now, and we've still got some fuel. It's not going anywhere, and we're all tired. Let's sleep on it and make our final decision in the morning." Asicca: "... yeah, okay, I am pretty tired. I suppose that's reasonable."

Hey guys. I've got a bit of a problem with my K&K Planetary Control Hub on Duna, pictured below: As you can see, I've got a lot of experiments in it. The plan was to pack them all into the shuttle and bring all of them home at once. But... When Bob EVA's, he doesn't have the "Take Data" option. I can't seem to get the experiments out of the Hub at all. Any idea how I can fix this? (Edit) In this particular case, I fixed it with the dark magic of save editing: copied the experiments to Bob's ScienceContainer module in the quicksave and revised their parent part id to refer to Bob himself. But it's still an issue to be aware of. I think it's caused by the CollectDataExternalEvent's "unfocusedRange" variable being set to 2 (meters), which due to the size of the part means you can never get close enough to the parts origin for the option to appear. Hope that helps!

It turns out the LARCIS (Launch And Relative Clamp In Space) is not quite so obedient as I had hoped: it will follow me around like a puppy for as long as I stay at 1x speed, but loses interest and buggers off if I use timewarp. I need to return to it's 200m radius to get it to follow me again. Still, I can work with that. Just need to remember to go and collect it before each maneuver. My first task before anything else is to send the refueler back to Ike. I don't really *need* to, but it doesn't hurt. Before I do *that*, though, the crew needs to decide what they're going to do with the Monopropellant Assembler. Nobody actually expected to be able to retrieve it from Duna, so there's no plan in place. Two proposals are outlined: we can either bring it back to Kerbin where it can continue it's life as an orbital assembler, or retire it to Ike to serve as a tank for the Ike refueler (which currently cannot bring monopropellant to orbit). If we're bringing it back to Kerbin, it should stay with Shubby. Eventually the discussion ends in agreement to send it to Ike. We can always launch another if we are to assemble things around Kerbin. It joins the refueler and sets off. It circularises in a low (10km) equatorial orbit. Meanwhile on Duna, Valentina is organising a science expedition. We've got all the Duna Highland science we can carry, but what of the midland and lowlands? It looks like the nearest biome border is to the northwest. She carefully handpicks a crew specifically for the trials of this mission, and for once it's not Bob and Asicca. Hayemma is a mechanic so she's a shoe in, and Danny showed commendable "clinging to a spacecraft as it plummets through the atmosphere" skills on the way down to Duna, so he gets to come with too. Hayemma: "Alright commander, I'm psyched! Where are we driving to?" Valentina: "Driving to? Heh. Heheh." Danny: "Oh no." Hayemma: "Um... why are you chuckling ominously to yoursel-" Valentina: "BWAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA!" Danny & Hayemma: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-" Valentina: "WHOOOOO! I LOVE THIS THING!" Despite the excitement of launch, it's ultimately a fairly routine expedition a well as a chance to work out the range of the hopper's hops. Valentina uses up half the fuel, and we check the trajectory. Not nearly far enough to reach the poles, sadly. Danny: "Looks like we're over the lowlands, Valentina." Valentina: "Okay, hang on to something. Blowing the parachutes." [fizzle] Hayemma: "Uh oh." Valentina: "Hayemma... did you repack the parachutes before we left?" Hayemma: "Well maybe I would have if somebody had told me we'd need them!" Danny: "Oh no! We're doomed! Dooooomed!" Hayemma: "We're not doomed. Valentina just has to perform a powered landing." Danny: "Doooooooomed!" After landing, Danny get's out and fusses about with the science, while Hayemma gives the rover a once over and Valentina checks the maps. Valentina: "Thirty-two Kilometers. Could probably stretch that out to forty with a more efficient trajectory..." Hayemma: "Unfortunately, that powered landing cost us. We're on a bit more than a quarter fuel. The return trip shouldn't cost as much, especially with the chutes working, but still... I don't trust it" Danny: "I'd like to get some samples from the foothills before we go back. That's between us and base." Hayemma: "So we can pick up some science and save some fuel in the process. And we'd be driving over relatively flat terrain. Sounds good: I'll deactivate the SAS." Valentina: "Road Trip!" Danny: "Alright, I've got what we came for. Ready for the trip back." Hayemma: "You seem remarkably calm. What happened to "dooooommmmed"?" Danny: "I trust parachutes a lot more than I trust Valentina." Hayemma: "Fair point. " Valentina: "Hey why should you guys have all the fun? I'm going to launch from out here!" Danny: "SHOTGUN!" Hayemma: "SHO- dammit. Okay fine, you get the cabin. Oh, Commander, before we launch please remember to-" Hayemma: "... TURN THE SAS BACK ON!" Valentina: "Haha! Whoo! That was awesome! Wasn't that awesome? I like spinning." Hayemma: "Hate... you... so... much..." Valentina: "Okay, there we go. I've fixed our trajectory. We've got plenty of fuel. Should be smooth sailing from here!" Valentina: "Okay, blowing the parachutes. For real this time. Hang on..." Valentina: "We're home!" Asicca: "How'd it go?" Danny: "[eye twitch] Doooommmmed..." Hayemma: "Never again, you hear me? NEVER AGAIN!" Asicca: "Alright I get it, stop shaking me! Go and see Daphdolin in the habitat for cake and grief counselling." Danny & Hayemma: "Ooh, cake!" ------ Danny and Hayemma had their cake and spoke to the doctor, and Valentina celebrated a successful expedition in her own way. ------

Asicca: "Hey commander, I've been thinking..." Valentina: "Yes?" Asicca: "The monopropellant orbital assembler. It was really handy. Seems a shame to use it as ballast and then just leave it here on the ground. I know we had to bring it down with us because the skycrane was unbalanced otherwise, but do you think we could get it back up if it was fully fueled? I mean, there's a lot of RCS in it and not much payload to speak of, so that's quite a bit of Delta-V." Valentina: "Nah, no point. Take a look: the wind knocked off the solar panels on the way down. The cells are probably scattered half way across the planet." Asicca: "I'm a construction engineer, boss. I figure I can jury rig a spare solar panel to it." Valentina: "And where are you going to get a spare solar panel from?" Asicca: "Well I figured I could take one of the foldable's ones off the rover..." Valentina: "Hurt my rover and they will never find your body." Asicca: "... oooorrrr I could take one off of the ones off the shuttle." Valentina: "Oh. Okay, that makes sense. Very well, go ahead." Asicca: "Okay, she's ready. Just got to hope she's got enough Delta-V to make it to orbit." Valentina: "Hey, you didn't tell me you weren't even sure if it would make it. That makes it more fun! Hey Bob, you want to do the countdown for us?" Bob: "Okay! Ten... Nine... Twenty Seven... Pineapple..." Asicca: "What did you give him?" Valentina: "I helped." Bob: "Five... Four... the Spiders My God the Spiders... Three... Two... One..." [pffffffffffffffffffftttttttttttt] Valentina: "Wow. That was... underwhelming." Asicca: "What did you expect? It's a monopropellant assembler, not a rocket." ------- Asicca: "It made orbit!" Joevey: "Cool. Do you want me to get Shubby to pick it up, or..." Asicca: "Nah, I've still got monopropellant for rendezvous." ------- Dammit Asicca, I just got done cleaning that thing up. Fix this mess up immediately. Asicca: "Fiiiinnnneee!" That's better. ------- Alright, let's check the mission list. We've built Duna Ultrabase and the Ike Refueling Station. We've recovered Part PTH2N (I'm still confused about Kerbins-Most-Expensive-SRB there), delivered Dunashugah and the Roverhopper, and transmitted Science from Ike and Duna. That just leaves one mission in the Duna system: Recover Part RN7-H. How hard can it be? ------- Three maneuvers later, Shub Niggurath is on-course for a rendezvous with it. Hainy: "I wonder what the part will be? A command module? A special prototype engine?" Asicca: "Whatever it is, it can't be dumber than a Solid Rocket Booster. What kind of idiot puts a solid rocket booster into orbit around Ike?" Henfield: "We're closing in on the part now, ma'am. Should be getting images shortly. Ah here we go. Looks like a..." Hayemma: "Is that a..." Asicca: "You've got to be kidding me." Asicca: "A launch clamp? A launch clamp?" Valentina: "Wow. I'm not even mad. That's just impressive." Asicca: "Why would they- JUST WHY?!" Henfield: "Oh I say. This is odd." Asicca: "Ya think?" Henfield: "Not that, ma'am. The clamp appears to have matched our velocity." Asicca: "Wait, what?" Henfield: "It's maintaining a distance of 200 meters from the craft. I don't seem to be able to get any closer. I can't catch it, it's matching our velocity perfectly." Asicca: "What?" Valentina: "Does it follow if we back off?" Henfield: "Yes ma'am." Valentina: "Then that's fine. Let it follow us back to the Shub-Niggurath. If it wants to follow us home on it's own power, that'll be a saving on fuel for us." Asicca: "It's own power? IT'S A LAUNCH CLAMP?!" Hayemma: "Are you okay, Asicca?" Asicca: "I think I need to lie down." ------ Out of character: So... I'm pretty sure Part RN7-H is the TARDIS. It's a blue box that travels in space with no visible power source. It's maintaining a distance of 200 meters, which makes sense: what self-respecting TARDIS would let itself fall into the hands of the Kerbals? Even a functioning TARDIS is not worth quite as many funds to Kerman & Kerman as that SRB is worth to Moving Parts Experts Group. I'm starting to wonder if that SRB is secretly a doomsday device or something. I'm not sure I can actually finish this mission, but I'm damn well going to try. I can't dock with it, but if it's willing to follow me home maybe I don't need to. You know, I thought I'd seen some strange stuff in KSP, but this is hands down the weirdest thing yet.

Bob: "Okay Asicca here's the sample. One unit of Mystery Goo(TM). Be very careful with this stuff, it can be quite a handful." Asicca: "Acidic?" Bob: "No, but it may go for your throat and try to escape." Valentina: "Okay, I still don't get it. How does pouring Goo over a docking port make it unlock?" Bob: "Oh, it's fairly simple. The docking ports holding the base to the skycrane have become passively magnetised, probably by Duna's ionosphere during atmospheric entry. The magnetism isn't much, but it is enough to trick the dock's locking mechanism into thinking the electromagnets are on. And it won't release until they're off." "The magnetic sensor is a tiny iron pin that closes in the presense of a field, making a circuit that locks the clamps. All we've got to do is break that circuit and it'll unlock." "Mystery Goo(TM) is a non-conducting superfluid: capable of climbing surfaces and entering cracks. We're hoping if we flood the port with it, it should work it's way into the sensor and push between the the pin and it's contact, breaking the circuit and allowing us to release the port." Valentina: [Snoooooorrreee] "- bwuh? Uh! Oh, uh, yes. Very good. Good work. Uh... one more question. Why is Asicca chasing a fleeingball of mystery goo across the surface of Duna?" Bob: "Dammit, Asicca! I told you to be careful with it!" ------- This thing is a lifesaver. ------ *click* Asicca: "Huh? Oh... guys! I think it worked! Hang on, I'll just check to make sure... whoa! [THUMP] Asicca: "Oof!" Asicca: "Can confirm it worked." ------ [THUMP] [THUMP] [THUMP] ----- Alright, first things first. Bob runs off to get the rover, which is a kilometer away down the hill. Once he gets it back, Asicca hooks up the warehouse module. The buildings don't have any command probes and they're too heavy to push, so the rover will be handy. Asicca immediately regrets hooking them up side-by-side. Towing would have made more sense. After some ineffectual spinning, she parks the warehouse off to the side and they do some construction planning. Asicca: "Okay, there's nothing under the ISRU tower's landing legs. If we drop it and pull the skycrane off, we can drag the Hub out and put it where we want it." Valentina: "Okay, on it." Asicca: "Oh, wait, let me take the orbital assembler off first to balance it somewhat." [Pffft-pfft-pfffffft] Asicca: "Assembler down." [Ksshhhhh] [THUMP] Valentina: "ISRU Tower down." Valentina: "Detatching the skycrane now." [hideous metal-on-metal screeching as the skycrane slides over the docking port] Valentina: "Don't worry, I'm pretty sure that's normal." Bob: "Wow. That's a mess." Asicca: "Okay, rover hooked up. Gun it commander!" Asicca: "Perfect. Put it anywhere and we'll start assembling the base. Should be smooth sailing from here on out!" ------ Asicca: "Crap. The mining base is trapped under the skycrane." Valentina: "Hook it up, I'll pull it out. Man, I love this thing." ------ Asicca: "Base is nearly complete." Bob: "Looks good. Looks comfortable. I can't wait to get inside." Valentina: "Hah! You haven't seen the best bit yet! Check this out!" Bob: "Yeah, even I've got to admit that's pretty cool." ------ The base is split into two sections: living, and industry. Living space includes the habitat, the greenhouse, a storage warehouse, and the hub. Some distance away, to prevent the drilling vibrations from driving specific Kerbals to homocide (they know who they are), the industrial estate includes the mining module and the refining/power generation tower. Feels good to be on Duna finally. Thank you, that will be 856,000 funds. ------ Now we've just got to get the crew down. After a small amount of refueling, the shuttle splits off from Shub-Niggurath, and it quickly reforms. Shubby's not quite as impressive anymore, but I kinda like the wide-n-stubby aesthetic it's got going on. The Ike refueler Dunashugah performs the de-orbit burn and the crew prepares for landing. Solar panels are retracted, parachute staging is shuffled into the correct order, we check the action groups for the engines are still working (two of them aren't, but the heavy engines are still fine, and they're the important ones). The docking port is ejected, too. Hey, I didn't know it had seperation boosters! Cool. On the way down, Danny takes a leaf out of Bob's book, quickly gathering the upper atmosphere EVA report we forgot to take earlier. He did this of his own free will and was not threatened by anyone, as evidenced by the shaky signature on this insurance waiver. I start the slowdown burn early, without the heavy thrusters: in order to land perfectly on the base, I can't afford to rely on the parachutes too much. I end up spending most of the descent in map view. The trajectories mod shows exactly how little Duna's atmosphere affects our trajectory: I could probably have landed just as accurately without it. Heavy thrusters are activated fairly close to the ground, and we rapidly reduce our velocity in the air over the base. Once we're going vertical, I activate the parachutes. Look at that: a perfect landing! And I didn't do many failed simulations of this landing at all. Only... [counts on fingers]... [runs out of fingers]... nevermind how many failed simulations of this landing I did, that's not important. What's important is that the landing was soft, safe and dignified. Disembarking proves to be slightly less dignified. Valentina, Bob and Asicca are happy to see the rest of the crew, although slightly less happy than they would have been if the crew hadn't made them do all work building the base. Kerbalkind: welcome to Duna!

Some last-minute orbital assembly: I fixed up the mess I'd made of Shub-niggurath. But who cares about that? The Duna Base is ready for descent! The crew gets excited and starts packing for the trip until I remind them we still need to wait for SCANSat data, at which point thir eyes glaze over as they instantly lapse into a boredom induced coma. By the time they wake up the Satellite has it's a good percentage of the surface mapped: enough for the crew to pick a landing site, anyway. There's some debate about the best site: the scientists would obviously prefer a location of scientific interest, at a convergence of biomes, while the engineers are more interested in somewhere equatorial, with lots of ore. Discussions get heated, and eventually Valentina is forced to step in. "A pox on both your houses! We're landing here, and that's final!" "What? Why there?" "It has a nice view." Alright, well it's no use arguing with Valentina. Ever. The crew burns northwards to put Shubby into an elliptical orbit, passing over the target site. We'll need a landing beacon, so the rover's up next. I set a manuever node and check it's t-minus... 8 minutes until the deorbit burn? EIGHT MINUTES? Valentina: "Crap! Bob, Asicca, you're with me! Into your EVA suits! Get to the rover! Hurry!" I'm sure it will be perfectly safe to sit on the exterior of the rover during atmospheric entry. Once again, Bob's experience with clinging desperately to the side of spacecrafts as they enter the atmospheres of planets will come in handy! Asicca joins him because somebody's has to know how to change the tires, and as usual Valentina will be piloting. Valentina: "Crew aboard. 6 minutes left. Someone start refueling the rover!" Valentina: "Rover fueled!5 minutes left! Are we forgetting anything?" Bob: "Oh no! We didn't do any experiments in Low Duna Orbit!" Valentina: "Well hurry up then!" [SFX: whirr, clunk, muffled "for science!"] Valentina: "3 MINUTES LEFT! UNDOCK! POINT RETROGRADE! HURRY, OR WE'LL HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER WHOLE ORBIT UNTIL WE LAND!" Asicca: "Wait, what? Isn't a full orbit only like, barely an hour? What's the rush?" Valentina: "MAXTHROTTLEBURRRRNNNNN!" Okay. Okay, we're good. The stressful part's over. Now all Bob and Asicca have to do is enter the atmosphere of another planet at orbital speeds strapped to the top of a car. Oh, what are they screaming about now? I said the stressful part was over. Looks like this area down there is a wee bit hillier than I was expecting. Oh well. I'm sure that won't cause any problems. Parachutes away! It's dusk when the crew lands (on the side of a cliff) but they've got batteries so, after the usual shenanigans associated with landing on a new celestial body (science, flags, sinister occult rituals, etc), Val elects to do some driving before we stop for the night. We make it to the top of the nearest ridge without any issues, and everyone gets comfortable in their EVA suits for the night (for a given value of 'comfortable'. Not a particularly high value, either). The next morning they focus on getting to the top of the plateu. It takes a few stops to re-charge, but the slope levels out after a while and the rover reaches the top without any problems. Val keeps driving over another ridge or two to get a feel for the local terrain. Now we just need a flat landing site to set up our new home. And with a gorgeous view. Valentina reminds me the view is essential. -------- Well then. I guess I can't put it off any longer. The roverhoppers co-ordinates are entered into the GPS for Payload Delta, aka The Duna Ultrabase. In. Twenty-eight minutes fifty seconds. Burn Left onto. Inclined Orbit. In. Fourteen minutes seventy seconds. Burn Retrograde onto. Suborbital Descent. A steep angle of descent should, in theory, help us land closer to the target. Besides, I've got plenty of fuel and parachutes. I hope. I decouple the docking port: won't be needing that where we're going. Goodbye dearest! Well. I guess it's time to begin... ... *ahem*... The Final Approach Valentina puts Ride of the Valkyries on, because why not. Da-dada-da-dah. Da-dada-da-dah. Da-dada-da-dah. Da-dada-daaaaah. da- Da-dada-da-dah. Da-dada-da-dah. Da-dada-da-dah. Da-dada-daaaaah. Dadah-dada-dah. Dadah-dada-dah. Da-dada-dah. Da-dada-daaaaah. da- Da-dada-da-dah. Da-dada-da-dah. Da-dada-da-dah. Da-dada-daaaaah. Hiya-haa... Hiya-haa, hiya-haaaaaaaaaaaaahhh, hiya-haaaaaaaaaaaaahhh.... Aaaaaaaa... stop sliding... sttooopoooppp... HHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH.... --------- Welp. Ended up nearly 2.5 kilometers away from the landing site. Nailed it. Valentina does a 180 and brings the rover to the new base site, complaining loudly about having to drive back over ground she'd already covered. The site has a nice view but... it's kinda slopey. Who wants to live in a slopey ground base? Luckily, Valentina is there to assess the situation. Asicca: "It's looking good commander. Everything's intact, near as I can tell. Shame about the gradient, but we'll have time get used to it." Valentina: "No wait, I've got a better idea. Did you repack the parachutes?" Asicca: "I did, why... oh. I see where this is going." Valentina: "It'll be fun! Help me carry Bob into the base." ---------- Valentina: "T-minus 10 seconds... 9... 8... Bob: "Yawn.... did I faint again? Wait, where am I? What's going on?! Why am I duct taped to-" Valentina: "... 2... 1... LIFTOFF!" Bob: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-" Bob: "-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-" Bob: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-" Bob: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-" Bob: "-AAAAAA- oh, hey, we're down. Excellent piloting, Valentina." ----------- Okay. This site looks perfect. Time to build the base! Undock! .... UNDOCK? .... Please undock? ..... Ooooh-kay. None of the buildings will detach from the skycrane. Not good. Asicca, can you take a look? Asicca: "Nope, sorry boss. They're wedged tight. I thought I could disassemble them, like Hainy did with those landing legs back around Minmus, remember? But the hanging structure is actually pulling it tighter... Valentina: "Okay, did we pack any C4 then?" Asicca: "Why on Kerbin would we... no. No, commander, we did not bring any C4 to Duna." Bob: "Okay, so... what now then, Valentina?" Valentina: "Now? Now... now we take a break and have some snacks." Asicca: "So that we can approach the problem with a fresh mind later?" Valentina: "No, because I'm bored and hungry." ---------- ... so it looks like I'm going to have to do some save file editing to fix this. I justify this because it's a bug: docking ports aren't supposed to malfunction and become irreversibly attached to each other. So.... to be continued once I work save editing out, I guess!

Come now, it isn't that complex. Shub Niggurath only has... umm... [counts on fingers]... [runs out of fingers]... one moment... * Stingray * Stingray Crew Module * Stingray RCS surface probe which I forgot to use AGAIN. * Iota Mining Probe * Iota Landing Pad * Iota Skycrane * Iota Skycrane's Hat * Iota Refueler * Octopus * Dunashugah * Roverhopper * Delta Base Hub * Delta Greenhouse * Delta Habitat * Delta Mining Base * Delta Warehouse * Delta ISRU Tower * Orbital Assembler * Spare Claws (x2) * Surface Scanning Probe ... Twenty-One separate mission critical components/craft. What could possibly go wrong with such a simple mission? ------ Do refueling launches from Minmus count? Because if not, I totally did this mission with 4 launches. :thumbsup: Of course, getting into space is usually only the start of my problems... ------ I am 100% confident nothing will go wrong and sincerely believe I will not regret ejecting the parachute that was attached to the assembler. Symmetrically aligned parachutes? Balanced payloads? Overrated! ------ Also, I worked out how I'm going to fix the undocking problem without save editing. Like all good plans, it involves explosions.

Aaaaaall-righty then. The base is working, the rocket is full, and we have a total of 7 kerbals on the surface of Ike (Valentina, Bob, Asicca, Danny, Henfield, Hainy and Hayemma) with 4 remaining on the Stingray (Joevey, Kertrid, Ratina and Daphdolin). We've been very careful about that "7", because only two craft will be returning to space: the refueler (seats 4) and the roverhopper (seats 3). And when we say "seats", we mean that literally. Who needs things like "life support" and "seat belts"? The refueler launches first with 4 units of kargo. It looks like it will function okay as a refueler: it's not nearly as good as the one on Minmus, but it can bring about half an orange tank of fuel and oxidiser to orbit safely. (For a given value of "safely") The rover is up next. I accidentally timewarp past the launch window, so rather than waiting for the next orbit, Valentina turns off the safety and sets the throttle to 11 to try and catch up with the Stingray. Bob and Danny don't approve of her decision, but Valentina's enjoying herself which is what matters. The rover itself doesn't have any RCS, but the Stingray does. Feels weird docking from the perspective of the much bigger ship, but it isn't too hard to achieve once I remember to turn the SAS on the rover off. Everyone boards the Stingray, safe at last. Time to go to Duna, then? ------ Hmm... my eye catches on Part PTH2N in the map view. Okay, so we don't have the claws we were planning to use to retrieve it, but we do have a claw... the one on the refueler. It would be more efficient to grab the part now and take it with us to Duna. Then we just have to put the refueler back in Ike orbit on the way out. Sounds like a plan. The refueler obediently sets out to rendevouz with the part. Part of me really wants to know who put an Solid Rocket Booster in Ike orbit, but even more than that I think I want to know why this SRB is worth more than 600,000 funds to them. I'm pretty sure I could get a used one for a couple hundred funds on e-bay. Oh well, not my place to question our corporate overlords. The refueler brings it back to the Stingray. So... time to go to Duna now then? ------ Hmm... we really didn't do much science while we were down on Ike, did we? I check the SCANSat biome map. Yeah, I can see a few good places to land the roverhopper. Valentina's always up for another dangerous landing, so she refuels the rover, grabs a spare scientist and engineer, and descends towards 43E on the equator. A bit of driving about nets us another 30 or so delicious experiments before Val launches the hopper back into orbit. Okay, that went well. Now is it time to go to Duna? Please? ----- Hmm... I should probably send the SCANSat probe ahead before I actually put the crew in Duna orbit. That way it can start mapping while we do the orbital assembly in preparation for the actual landing. Let's see... Xenon probe means more than enough delta-V. Alright, perfect! So, shall we go to Duna now? ------ Hmmmmmmmmmmmm... *smack* Ow! Okay okay fine, we'll go to Duna. Geez! Everyone's a critic. This image wasn't actually taken on the way to Duna, but it's pretty. The actual burn takes place in the shadow of Ike. Everyone braces for acceleration, and... Whoops. That's not an explosion, just the engines on the refueler. Which I suppose is technically an explosion, but it's not the bad sort of explosion. I just forgot to turn the low ISP engines off. Silly me! One rendezvous maneuver later and the crew of the Stingray intercepts Payload Delta in low Duna orbit. Okay, we've got quite a bit of orbital assembly to do here, so let's get started. The Orbital Assembler detatches from Payload Delta. Don't need it's hat, so I eject it too. Whoops, forget to give the hat a docking port so I could reattach it later. Oh well, I'm sure I won't miss the parachute on it probably. I MAKE GOOD DECISIONS! We also decouple the two modular claws (each simply a claw on a docking port) and the assembler brings them over to those weird side-ports on the stingray. Finally, the assembler moves the (super-expensive I guess?) SRB to one of the claws, freeing up the front of the Stingray. We might as well make use of that claw on the front. Val connects the Stingray to the Octopus so the two ships won't drift apart, and Shub-Niggurath is reborn, even more hideous than before! We've still got quite a bit of assembly to go: I hope the Assembler doesn't run out of Monopropellant. ------ We still need to move the components of Payload Delta into a landing configuration, so I guess it's finally time to blow the fairings. Behold! Yeah, the base components are pretty dull, especially stowed for storage like this. They'll look better once they're assembled and on the ground. Before the assembler can get to work, however, I detach the entirety of Payload Delta from everything else and allow it to drift away. Once it reaches 2.2 km, the rest of Shub-Niggurath (and the lag) vanishes. Beautiful. The assembler gets to work... The first base building detaches and attempts to flee, but the assembler chases it down before it gets too far. Well... it's a bit crooked, but that's no big deal. We can sort that out once we're on the ground. Another building in place. And that's the third... Assembly complete: the buildings are placed. The assembler returns to it's perch atop the skycrane, and the entire structure is finally ready to descend to Duna. Let's hope it works! (it better work) Now all I'm waiting for is SCANSat data to help me pick my landing site... ------- (Note: I was planning to fix the crooked base building, but I seem to have stumbled onto this bug. None of my buildings will undock from the skycrane! Will need to work out how to fix that before the actual descent)

My problem is that I can't pick up things once they're attached to other... My problem is that I'm an idiot who didn't read the manual. 'G' to pick up things, huh? That's convenient! Okay, Asicca can fix that pipe now. The refueling base works again! Nice work, Asicca. ... except that now this means I'm going to have to actually attempt to refuel things from this stupid pad. Whose brilliant idea was it to use a landing pad instead of a simple refueling rover like I did on Minmus? Oh that's right it was mine. Nevermind then! I'm having "fun"!

I return! Screw it! Who needs claws: can do that mission later. For now, let's focus on Payload Iota: the Ike refueling base. First of all, we need to get that xenon probe into a polar Ike orbit and do a survey. Easy enough... Excellent. A good bit of high quality ore on the equator: exactly what I was hoping for a refueling base. I check the Narrow Band Scanner GUI: and briefly consider the possibility that I don't understand how to use it, before discarding that in favor of the more egotistical conclusion that it's useless and also stupid. ------ Back to Payload Iota, then... Given that there is absolutely no way to get a high resolution imaging of surface ore levels whatsoever, the first thing to send down will be the Roverhopper. With wheels and a surface scanning module, it will be perfectly suited to identify the perfect spot for landing. Valentina is already aboard it and "volunteers" Bob and Asicca to join her, for science and engineering respectively. Given the lack of internal space, they will be desperately clinging securely fastened to the exterior of the rover during descent... fun! Valentina decouples the rover and drifts to a safe distance. Don't need the docking port anymore, so Valentina jettisons it. I am certain this choice will never come back to haunt us in any way ever. The descent goes according to plan: the hoppers Thrust to Mass ratio is impressive, so it only takes small bursts to halt our orbital velocity. The lack of landing legs is a brief worry, but hopper turned out to be fairly easy to control in flight and the suspension proves capable of taking a hit. The rover touches down safely with no damage to the wheels, and nothing more concerning than a few more psychological scars for Bob, poor bugger. Valentina drives east looking for the highest ore concentration on the equator, with the meticulous concern for safety she is renowned for. She gets some impressive hang time on Ike's rocky surface and low gravity, as do some of the local rocks. Eventually though, the ore levels on the scanner start decreasing. Val backs up a few hundred meters, puts the brake on, and the three of them stop and commence the usual flag-planting and science-collecting ritual. The spot is a bit slopey, but I have a plan for that! ------ Next up, the mining probe. Danny and Henfield will pilot this one down. After a brief mistake during which the engines were fired prograde due to not realising where the probe was being controlled from (dammit Henfield!), the probe comes down, targeting the rover's co-ordinates. The landing spot looks different from up here. The base lands, and the 5 Kerbals meet up. Henfield and Danny extend the probe's radiators and start it running before Asicca has them pose for a photo. ----- Second to last part of the base: the Landing pad. I built this because I didn't trust Ike's hilly terrain to give me a good spot to land. Depending on which legs are extended it has 3 different slope settings, plus a bunch of spare parts that KAS will allow me to plug directly into the mining probe. It will be brought down by the remote-controlled skycrane-with-a-hat. Both pieces are undocked and re-docked before descending. Excellent! The landing goes off without a hitch. The pad puts down just east of the mining probe. Asicca surveys their respective positions, then carefully attaches the spare pipes in the most aesthetically pleasing manner possible... ... no. Asicca... Asicca, I'm responsible for the abomination that is Payload Delta and even I think that is ugly as sin. Try again. "God you're picky!" "There, happy now?" Yes, thank you Asicca. That's much better. Lastly, we won't need the skycrane with the hat any longer, but you never know when a spare skycrane with a hat might come in handy, so whoever is piloting it parks it in the corner. Who is piloting it anyway? Maybe the hat is piloting it. ----- One more trip. Payload Iota ejects the structural adapter, and the refueler detaches. Hainy and Hayemma board the exterior seats (<3 those things). Hainy has seniority, so she gets to be the right way up during landing. Refueler: away! Hmm... it just occurred to me, I've never landed a ship on another ship before. Oh well, how hard can it be? Carefully... carefully... argh! No, go the other way. Not that way! The other other way! LAWS OF PHYSICS WHY DO YOU HATE ME SO?! ----- Okay, that quite took a bit of effort and most of my remaining fuel, and I never want to do it again, which probably isn't great for a refueling rocket. But hey, we made it! We're docked with the landing pad, which is docked with the mining probe, which is refueling... correction, supposed to be refueling the rocket... why isn't this working? Oh. That's... well... that's not good. Must have knocked them out of place during the landing. Asicca, please tell me you can re-connect those. No? And we have no reusable parts at all? So what you're telling me is, until we get some spare parts up there, this entire mining operation is completely non-functional? I'm going to go somewhere private to swear now. (Edit) You can? You can! Excellent. Asicca reports the pipe is fixed and the refueling base is functional again. Everyone takes some time out for a well-earned sandwich while the rocket fills up: we won't be spending long on Ike. We've got things to be doing! -------