Make a wish... and have it horribly corrupted!

[BurntPhoenix]

Granted, they're all as dumb as young Brian Regan

i wish for a truckful of lightbulbs

[mythbusters844]

Granted, but they are filled with trinitrotoluene and explode when you power them.

I wish that I was better at ASCII art

[THENEWJOEMAMA]

Granted, but you can only draw... unspeakable things...

I wish for not wishing.

[vexx32]

Granted, but wishing for nothingness results in... well, you stop existing. Bye.

I wish for something.

[Deltac]

Granted, you now live in the void between universes.

I wish I lived underwater. Perhaps in a pineapple, but I'm also open to rocks.

[vexx32]

Granted, you will now live out the brief remainder of your life pinned to the ocean floor by a rather large boulder. Happy drowning!

I wish for a 20x20x20 rubik's cube.

[Dooz]

Granted its a unsolvable 999999999x9999999999x999999999 Rubiks cube

I wish. WoW had better spell effects

[vexx32]

Granted. You go to your computer for a session of WoW. In the midst of a frenzied battle, you think you hear a faint crackling sound. It grows slowly louder until you realise where it's coming from -- the screen in front of you. As the fires of battle raged, your screen lit on fire ever so slowly. Now freed and in this world, the unnatural flames spread swiftly, engulfing your computer, then you, then the entire building. Immense fireballs form above the building and swiftly ignite further dwellings. The fire spreads from building to building, or crossing ground both barren and lush alike until the entire continent is naught but razed buildings and ash.

I wish I could sleep for a few days.

[Depth]

I wish I could sleep for a few days.

Death beckons with its bony finger. You are dead. On your grave lies a 20x20x20 rubik's cube.

I wish I could have a normal sleeping pattern

Edited November 19, 2013 by Depth

[Firenexus13]

Granted, you (permanently) get a Japanese normal sleeping pattern, so you have to move to china or sleep during the day and get fired.

[Depth]

Since there is no wish

I wish to work on night shifts with my japanese sleeping pattern

[quasarrgames]

Granted. Bad things come out in the night though, you know. One day a monster right out of "the fog" grabs you at night and eats you.

I wish for non-tragic irony.

[TheCanadianVendingMachine]

Granted. You got shot.

I wish for everything, and nothing at once

[THENEWJOEMAMA]

Granted. The nothing consumes everything, and that includes you.

I wish u al liekd mudkipz

[tstehler1]

Granted. Awl de mudkipz iz now teleported to Jool.

I wish Jeb would stop pushing the mysterious red button that I keep telling him not to touch.

[TheBadAstronomer]

Granted, but that button is blowing up the space center.

I wish that we had a base on the moon.

This reminds me of the story of The Monkey's Paw. If you haven't read it, go read it.

[zekes]

Granted...and then factions will wage a moon war.

I wish I could know what people were thinking...

[plainawesome]

Granted. You could only read the minds of people within a 1 meter radius of your head.

I wish I could take control over a person.

[TheCanadianVendingMachine]

Granted. You do so in Prison Architect

I wish for more Steam games

[vexx32]

Granted, but you are placed into a coma as your mind overloads with too many possible games.

I wish for some cake.

[mythbusters844]

Granted. The cake is actually some pie

I wish that nothing was so annoying.

[vexx32]

Granted. Empty space is now so damned annoying a bunch of nutjob scientists try to fill all of it with something. Cue the Big Bang Two.

I wish I didn't have to die so painfully.

[plainawesome]

Granted. Instead you died from a stroke.

I wish there was a world without death, and all of the dead people came back to life, as if they never died in the first place.

[TheCanadianVendingMachine]

Granted. This causes mass population, causing riots, more deaths, and no room

I wish for nothing, cause I am not a greedy person

[Dooz]

Granted You get everything You wanted greedyly

I wish the cake was not a lie