Make a wish... and have it horribly corrupted!

[megatiger78]

granted. forum urns into F*** U NO F*** YOU etc...

I wish that I knew what rule 2.2c was

[Tery215]

Nobody granted my wish :v

Granted. You have to read the rules.

I wish for the universe to run at 1 decihertz.

[megatiger78]

? you die

I wish my computer could run planetside 2 at a decent fps

[Mr_Brain]

Granted. However, the added power makes your computer overheat and turn into a puddle of molten silicon and other materials.

I wish for Earth to make one sharp turn to the left.

[Overfloater]

Granted: almost everyone gets flung off to the right, and there was nothing interesting where the Earth was headed.

I wish 25% of ocean water was converted to fresh, drinkable water. (a natural barrier would conveniently occur, to separate the 2 types of water)

[Tery215]

Granted. Giant goo monsters lurch out of the ocean and begin eating humans. They're made of freshwater, though.

I wish that there was something else to use as a "natural barrier".

[LABHOUSE]

Granted, it is you.

I wish that I would get used to my new glasses better without having to take them off and see 20/60 again.

[cantab]

Granted. The glasses are screwed into your skull. The attachment points become infected which spreads, but just before you die of meningitis you get used to your new glasses.

I wish I understood this PHP.

[Joshwoo70]

Granted. You understand but you will be fried on a hot day.

I wish we could have FTL drives.

(Side note: hi cantab!)

[Master Tao]

Granted. They have a strong tendency toward

.

I wish for sweet potato pie cheesecake.

[Tery215]

Granted. It's a pile of cheese potatoes, with some sugar on top.

I wish for an HP-ometer.

[cicatrix]

Granted. You get one, it reads 1 HP for you.

I wish the second law of thermodynamics was a lie.

[Tery215]

Granted. Entropy now decreases with every interaction. See that internal organ of yours? BAM, it exploded! Negative second law of thermodynamics.

I wish that the universe was fed dog food.

[Mr_Brain]

Granted. As it turns out, dog food is really bad for the universe and it dies.

I wish that this wasn't post 8714 of this thread.

[SmartS=true]

Granted, the internet never existed.

I whish for this wish, which is not for this wish to be corrupted, to not be corrupted.

[natonator200]

The wish machine is currently unable to process that request. please try again later.

I wish for a new computer.

[Ya_Boi_Assault]

Granted, your mind implodes for complexity of wish

I wish for some Kool-Aid and KFC

[SmartS=true]

They both contain dimethyl mercury.

I wish for everyone who reads this post to immeadiately black out and forget they ever read this post, so no one will ever corrupt this wish.

[megatiger78]

granted. just before this happens, the post goes on to every screen in the world, and all humans see it.

I wish that someone would just nuke west Africa and fix ebola forever.

[DMSP]

I don't even... But ok... Granted, but that causes 20 other mutant nuclear Ebola virus to spread across the globe.

I wish for good luck at the Middle School Dance tonight.

[Tery215]

Granted. You get all of the fame for your extremely lucky dancing, but you fall over half-way.

I wish for a doge.

[Red Iron Crown]

Granted. Much shedding. So allergy. Very sneeze. Wow.

I wish for an online currency that isn't so scammy.

[Mr_Brain]

Granted. However, even though the currency is perfectly acceptable, nobody trusts it anyway, so it doesn't get used.

I wish for the world to become monochromatic.

[megatiger78]

granted. all is now black, seeing as light has been removed so that no one will ever se again

I wish for a squad of republic commandos

[Helix935]

granted, due to your fanaticism for star wars, they confuse you for jedi and enact order 66

i wish to have the superpower known as adoptive muscle memory