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Kerbal History X


MrWalrus123

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242.1: In response to the need for some sort of portable breathing apparatus for Kerbals to use in space, a team of scientists and engine-nears attempts to invent an O2 tank. The best they could come up with was a chloroform tank, which is given the official stamp of approval for the space program since, after all, none of its users were heard to make any complaints.

242.5: Bediah Kerman builds a replica of the Kraken and is subsequently covered with green sludge and feathers by an angry mob.

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243: The Son of Kraken is born... The poor guy's father was named Kraken Kerman. He got a lot of problems because of his name...

However, he discovers that it might be a good idea to plan rockets ahead. Of course, his already low popularity is now nothing.

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244: While messing with helium tanks, one of the engine-nears is somehow able to put together an O2 tank. He is later unable to remember how he did it, due to inhaling too much helium. However, the O2 tank survives and is reverse-engineered, allowing the space program to mass-produce them.

245: One of Crazy Uncle Jeb's brothers discovers that if you put Jeb's coffee together with a tank of O2 and ignite it, you can make fire that looks almost as good as the fire that comes out of boosters!

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250: The Great Kathedral of Khalesm is built.

251: Using the newly-invented O2 tanks and the latest advances in aerospace technology, Jedediah, Will, and Rob Kerman (respective ancestors of Jeb, Bill, and Bob) embark on a large-scale Mun reconnaissance mission in a three-Kerbal capsule equipped with a small rover. There they discover the first known "Munarch", a large arch-shaped rock formation of unknown origin. A commemorative picture is taken and added to the official blueprint for the Mk2 Pod in order to motivate future Kerbals.

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252: 2 great kerbal leaders unite ther kerbonauts and engine-nears. 2 iron crowns are made-green and red. the green krown leads the engine-nears, with the red crown running kerbonauts and PR. the existence of the green krown is unknown to the public.

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  • 4 weeks later...
  • 2 months later...

262: A new mission for the rescue on Duna is launched. The mission is slow, as the technology of the debug menu was brought on the first mission, which is now destroyed. The mission will take well over a year. On Kerbin, the revolution between the fly boars and the Kerbals rages on, with many political and porklitical world leaders being executed and consumed by the opposing spieces. Imagine a bacon-wrapped chicken wing. That's how the wing of Sir Porkinstien the 3rd tasted. On Duna, the stranded Kerbals play cards to pass the time until they are rescued. Luckely, they have infinite oxygen regardless of the debug menu being destroyed. The cabin feever drives Dudrick Kerman mad, and he one day walks to the top of a tall hill and jumps, blasting his jetpack upwards, and is never seen again...

Yeah, Dudrick was on that craft. As well as Sidi Kerman. They just kind of snuck in and were discovered about halfway to Duna.

Edited by Prof. Endwalker
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(It's back! o_O)

262.1: Jedediah Kerman (ancestor of Jebediah Kerman) dies of a mysterious disease, later dubbed "Standing Too Close to a Solid Rocket Booster Syndrome". His dear friends Rob and Will, as well as his son Jobediah, are devastated, and begin a research program focused on building a mechanical Kerbal that never dies and can be rebuilt after any disaster. Unfortunately, their prototypes are all failures, and the only useful thing produced by their research is a beaker of a mysterious liquid, which after being thrown in the dumpster, slowly condenses into "mystery goo".

264: Braun Kerman is staring into a small telescope in his backyard when he notices a grain of pollen on the lens. He grabs a paper towel and furiously attempts to wipe it off, but to no avail. Fortunately, pointing the telescope in another direction somehow made it disappear. Several days passed before it occurred to him that the pollen grain was, in fact, a new planet, which he names "Jool" due to its jewel-like green hue. (You thought it was going to be Pol, didn't you? ;P)

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265: The original creator of Kerbal History finds out that his legacy still survives in the forum, reborn like a phoenix from the ashes of previously griefed threads. (jk) I'm really happy !

265: The kerbals find out that magnets on a rimmed hole can help link craft.

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Stardate 266: KerbalKind has found some sort of a gas giant, well, a Minmus-sized grey-blue gaseous planet with many small muns - our plan is to send some probes to each one of those muns, and a sample from each to better our understanding of miniaturized worlds.

*p.s. - someone make a kopernicus mod for this. Please*

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267: kerbals perplexed at what a "stardate" is

268: astrofox kerman arrested by the kerbal police for "necromancy" no-one knows what that is.

269: the north pole UFO which was discovered in 199 but kept secret vanishes. kerbal space navy founded, for some reason lacks kerbal space marines.

(what were the Kau, anyway? it sounds like Tau)

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(I think that was the idea - the Kerbal Tau. It seems innocuous enough but in practice it got really annoying.)

270: Kerbals have by now discovered after various disasters that while cool, magnets are not actually that good a structural element for launch vehicles. A team of engine-nears is convened to find a more practical way to make use of magnets in the space program, with dubious results. For several months they are unable to produce anything useful, until at last Will Kerman reveals the invention of a device that uses nothing but magnets and electrical power to turn a wheel. This seemed useless at first, but it was found that these devices were able to provide thrust when placed between a vehicle and the ground, albeit only horizontally. This had previously been something that could only be done using more boosters, leading to the magnetic wheel-turning device being dubbed the "mo-tor" (a contraction of "magnetic booster").

271: After much theorizing, the team of engine-nears concludes that in the near future it may be possible to use magnetic rings to construct spacecraft in orbit, where the forces acting on them would generally be small and predictable, and if fuel valves and pumps could be included within the rings, it would be possible to use them to transfer resources between ships or use a number of modular components to build ships with much greater size and fuel capacity than would be practical to launch from the ground.

Edited by parameciumkid
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273: kerbals dig into old history, and find Von Kerman's old studies. they decide to see what a Kau is, but fail because they have no warp drive, and the research proves that they do not exist.

(what KH ed. did that Kau come from anyway?)

274: Kerbals experiment with large rings. what could come from this research?

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274.5 They discovers that placing explosives in the rings can allow craft to separate into two parts easily. HENCE THE DECOUPLER IS BORN.

275: Kerbals discovered how to take a surface sample by (quote from discoverer, Calming Kerman) "Squatting and scooping up dirt"

276: Kerbals experiment with sticks with a flat base. What would come from the research?

Guys, I should suggest that each thread ends with a "cliffhanger" styled phrase, such as "What could come out of this research?" in order to help link up the history and the general flow of the game. Anyhow, keep up the

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277: kerbals name the exploding rings decup (after their inventor decup kerman) lors (no idea). decup-lors are used to separate bits of rocket.

278: kerbals experiment with larger rings. What ccould come of this research now?

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279: Kerbals invent reinforced structural parts, larger docking ports, and larger decouplers.

280: Astrofox Kerman released from prison for telling us the sky coordinates of the world and explaining what a "stardate" is.

281:Kerbal scientists rediscover the little gas planet, and decide to send an unmanned spacecraft over to explore a small moon of it - What could Possibly go wrong...

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