Ozymandias_the_Goat

OK, thanks!

Rotterdam

Thanks everyone! PS, when am I allowed to post pictures?

Here is a kerbalized version of the film Interstellar: (sorry no pics) INTERKERBOLAR Jeb: You know; nothing beats an evening like this, with tacos and cold drinks. Kurph: Sure right. Anyway, the Kerbin series starts next week. Who you betting on? Jeb: Green Coast, no question. Rick Kerman has skills! Kurph: No way! Dundard’s Edge has the skills. You want twenty bucks? Jeb: Deal! Get ready to smash your piggy bank! Kurph: You mean your wallet! Jeb: Oh, no; looks like another dust storm’s coming. Let’s get inside. Kurph: The thing is back. Jeb: Great. Hey, that’s my lander! Kurph: The thing broke it. Jeb: The “thing” that’s sitting in my face now! Kurph: It’s not. There’s another messagey thing. Jeb: Sure. <15 minutes later> Jeb: It’s a set of coordinates; precisely 90, 270. Kurph: Let’s go there! Jeb: No, stay. Kurph: Okay fine. <Kurph stows away> Jeb: You! Kurph: Sorry. You know how it is. I just… <Car crashes into fence> Jeb: **** <Jeb drives over to exact coordinates> Jeb: Yay, more desert. Kurph: The map says it’s here. Jeb: But it’s not. Kurph: Loser. Hey, look at that square dude! SCOTT: Get out. Surrender immediately. Jeb: Who are you? What is…? SCOTT: Shut up! Come out <smashes windshield> Kurph: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! <SCOTT sedates both> <SCOTT interrogates Jeb.> SCOTT: The coordinates to this place were on your map. How? Jeb: Ah, you see, I was stopping by the tractor store when I made a wrong left turn and… SCOTT: That’s bogus crap! Jeb: I love how you just looked in the mirror and described yourself! <The Professor is interrogating Jeb and Kurph with his pals.> Professor: So how? I want answers, not insults. Jeb: So I was just going to this place where they have like… Kurph: It was gravity. Bob: Say again? Kurph: Gravity. Thig thing in my room is trying to… Professor: What thing? CHASE: Presumably some poltergeist character who appears to have the intention of… Bill: Smarty-pants setting; 65% CHASE: Confirmed. Some “ghost” <All huddle and discuss> <All turn and face Jeb> Professor: She’s right. A gravitational anomaly possibly similar to the one we discovered out by Jool… Jeb: Ahhh, you think you’re rocket scientists. <All giggle> Jeb: What? Professor: Actually, we are rocket scientists. We’re the KSP. The same KSP you flew for. Jeb: No way! Gene, is that you? Gene: Yup. Professor: Now, back on topic. The gravitational anomaly is the largest of many we found over the years. We found it 48 years ago. Now, I believe that you too, encountered one? Jeb: Yeah, over the crater. Something tripped my Fly-by wire. Professor: Yes, and now something is really special about our Jool friend. It’s a wormhole. Jeb: It can’t! A wormhole is not a naturally occurring phenomenon! Vall: So we think that someone placed it there for us. Just in time. Whoever “they” are, they seem to be looking out for us. Professor: Now, let me show you around the place. Professor: And this here is the VAB. <Huge doors open> Jeb: A KLS and Ranger. Professor: Yeah. There’s more up there. Now you must make a choice. You can either join the mission or leave. Jeb: What mission? Professor: THE mission. Kerbin won’t be habitable forever. Jeb: How will you save it? Professor: It’s simple; we don’t. We leave it. The mission is the one you were trained for on the Mun. Jeb: I just can’t go. Listen, if I hadn’t come here, you would have gone anyway. Professor: We had no choice. But you are our best pilot. We need you. Jeb: Lemme go talk with Kurph. Professor: Fine. But then you must choose. I cannot tell you any more if you don’t. Jeb: Kurph, I have to go on a long space mission, and I may not see you in years. Kurph: Cool! When do you leave? Jeb: As soon as I can. Kurph: Awesome! You can’t even cook korn. It’s like, the only thing you can eat anymore. Bye! Jeb: She was more than glad to see me go. Khuck’s gonna want the truck though. Take it back to the farm. Professor: Sure. I think you should meet your crew. The launch is next Friday. Come on, you have to eat korn pizza one last time before you leave! Jeb: Honestly, I don’t want to see that stuff again. <Professor picks up slice> Professor: Your loss. I love it! <Professor is walking down halls with Jeb> Jeb: Where does your wormhole lead, anyway? Professor: Another galaxy. 12 planets orbit a huge black hole. We have sent Kerbals to all of them; the Kazarus missions. Jeb: Jolly name. Professor: Indeed; 12 of the bravest Kerbals to ever live, led by the remarkable Dr. Kannhead. If their planet showed promise, they send a signal and await rescue. Jeb: And If not? Professor: Hence the bravery. Anyway, three planets show promise. And tomorrow, you start your journey towards them. Jeb: What about everyone else? Professor: Well, there’s a plan “A” and a plan “B”. Notice anything about the VAB we have changed? Jeb: It’s a centrifuge. Professor: It’s a colony. Thousands can live on it. Others are being built elsewhere. Jeb: How does it get off the ground? Professor: The gravity anomalies changed everything. Harnessing gravity is real. I have written an equation that will allow us to reduce Kerbin’s gravity. By the time you return, I will have solved the equation. Jeb: And if not? <Enter Valentina (Vall from now on>) Vall: Population Bomb. 5000 fertilized embryos. We set up a colony on a planet and keep the species going. Jeb: And everyone else dies? Professor: That’s why plan “A” is a lot more fun. <Ranger/KLS awaits launch> Gene: You are at T-30 seconds. All go? Jeb: Go Vall: Go Bill: Go Bob: Go Gene: Ranger 1 is ready for launch. Lead engineer: KLS 70 ton is ready for launch. Gene: T-10…9…8…7…6…5…4, main engine start, 3…2…1, SRB ignition. Mission Control guy 1: Clamps released, we have liftoff. MC guy 2: Pitch and roll complete, over. <All cheer> Gene: Booster separation in 3…2…1, igniting nose thrusters. MC guy 2: Detachment bolts firing. MC guy 1: Boosters falling away. Gene: Boosters clear. <All cheer again> Gene: Engineering, stage 2 status? Lead engineer: Stage 2 is ready for ignition. MC guy 2: Staging in 3…2…1, engine cutoff, TR-38-D firing. MC guy 1: Stage 2 ignition. <All cheer for 3rd time> Gene: Stage two cutoff in 3…2…1, cutoff, TR-18 detonation. MC guy 1: Ranger 1 thrusters in 3...2…1, Ranger is firing. Gene: Ranger 1 is in orbit, on Kendurance intercept course. <10 minutes later> Gene: Velocities matched. MC guy 2: Jeb, the stick is yours. Jeb: Confirmed. Come on, baby. Gene: Range is 10 meters, 5 meters, retro thrusting, aaaaaannd docking complete! <All cheer; throw papers up, celebration stuff> MC guy 2: Bill, confirm docking. Bill: Docking firm, opening hatch. Jeb: 3 hours till Duna injection burn. Gene: Jeb, all engines nominal? Jeb: 1, 2, 3, and 4! Gene: Great. TDI burn in 5…4…3…2…1 burn! <Engines ignite> Gene: This is Gene Kerman, signing off. Godspeed, Kendurance. <Burn continues> Professor: Do not go gentle into that good night. Old age should burn and rave at close of day, Rage, rage against the dying of the light… Jeb: AAAAAND, engine shutdown. Jeb: CHASE, mission plan again? CHASE: Its eight months out to Duna, counter-orbital slingshot around, 14 more to Jool. Deceleration maneuvers around Slate. Nothing’s changed, Jeb. <Crew enter hibernation pods> Jeb: Listen SCOTT; do Vall and Ked’ have something going? SCOTT: I wouldn’t know. Jeb: Yeah, like, 90% don’t know, or 10% don’t know? SCOTT: I also have a discretion setting. Jeb: How convenient. Good night. SCOTT: Need a teddy bear? Jeb: Nah, he’ll get too wet. I’ll be sleeping with a cloud of fuzz. SCOTT: Figured. <2 years later at Jool> <Crew exits hibernation pods> SCOTT: Beep beeps, beep beep, beep beep beep beep… Jeb: Think you’re an alarm clock? I’ll hit your snooze button. SCOTT: That will not be necessary. Jeb: Good. Bill: Jeb, can we stop the spin? Jeb: Why? Bill: Now that we are here, can’t we look at the wormhole and Jool. Jeb: Sure, I guess. <RCS blocks fire> Jeb: It’s a sphere! Bill: You thought it would be an actual hole? Jeb: It looks like that in all the pictures! Bill: Yeah, but those pictures subtract one space dimension. The real thing is a sphere. What’s a 2D sphere? Jeb: A circle! Bill: right. <Preparing to cross wormhole> Bob: Easy does it, Jeb. Jeb: Crossing boundary. Bill: Everyone ready to say goodbye to our kerbolar system? Bob: Our Galaxy. Jeb: AAAAAAANND we’re in! <Ship rattles> Bill: Pretty purple. Bob: I like the blue. Vall: Just shut up. Jeb: We’re coming through. Jeb: We are…clear! <All cheer> <A few weeks later> <All discussing mission plans> Bob: So Killer’s planet is the closest to us, so I suggest we go there first. Vall: What about time slippage? Being so close to Kargantua… Jeb: Kargantua? Bob: The black hole that these planets orbit. And anyway, the time slippage would be so that for every hour we spend there, 7 years pass on Kerbin. <All shocked> Bill: Also, how will the Ranger rendezvous with the planet? Jeb: I can do a slingshot around that IMBH. Vall: Okay then. Who will stay with Kendurance? Bill: What are we talking about, a few years? I can study Kargantua. That data is gold to the Professor. Vall: So it’s set. Bill and SCOTT stay up. Everyone else takes a Ranger to Killer’s, picks her up, and goes. <Ranger undocks. Jeb: We are clear of Kendurance. Bill: Goodbye, Ranger. <Coming in on Killer’s planet, breaking through cloud layer> Bob: It’s all water. Vall: Stuff of life. Jeb: I’ll save a little fuel with landing; Circling around; 1000 meters…500…100…50, firing engines! <Rangers lands violently> Vall: Very graceful. Jeb: No, but very efficient. Well, what’s everyone waiting for? Go, go! Seven years per hour here, let’s make it count! <Vall and Bob exit> Vall: About 200 meters that way. Bob: The gravity’s punishing. Vall: Been floating through space too long? Bob: It’s 130% Kerbin gravity. <Continue walking> Bob: There’s nothing here. CHASE: Should be right here. <CHASE digs around, finds wreckage> Vall: Her beacon. <Walks away> Bob: Where’s the rest? Vall: < Still walking> towards the mountains: Jeb: <to self-> those aren’t mountains, they’re waves! Vall: Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap! Jeb: Vall, Bob, back to the Ranger now! We do not have time! Vall: We’re not leaving without her data! <Struggling with black box falls over> Jeb: VALL, GET BACK HERE NOW!!! Bob: CHASE, go get her, go, go, go! <CHASE picks ups Vall> Jeb: CHASE has her, get back here Bob! <Wave approaches Ranger> <Vall and CHASE jump in> <Bob reaches for Vall’s hand, gets overpowered by wave> <Ranger is tossed up by wave> <Ranger surfs over wave, falls down hard> Jeb: The engines are flooded! CHASE: let them drain. Jeb: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!<Punches everything in sight> <Jeb and Vall shout at each other> Vall: I was trying to do the right thing. Jeb: Can you say that to Bob? CHASE, how much time?! CHASE: Forty-five to an hour. Jeb: Stuff of life huh, Vall? How much is this gonna cost us? Vall: <mournfully> years, decades. I’m counting every minute. CHASE: Another wave is coming! Jeb: We don’t have time. Helmets on! I’m gonna use cabin oxygen to spark the engines! <Engines turn on violently> <Ranger narrowly escapes wave, returns to orbit> <Bill awaits crew of the Ranger, hatch opens> Bill: I’ve waited years. Vall: How many? Bill: By this point it must be…23 years. Where are Killer and Bob? Jeb: They…didn’t make it. Bill: At some point I figured none of you were coming back. I’ve done a lifetime of research. But I can’t transmit any of it back. I have no idea why. <All discussing> Bill: So we don’t have enough fuel to go to both Kannhead’s and Kedmund’s, so we have to choose. Vall: I think we should go to Kedmund’s. His data is more promising. Bill: They have a right to know. Vall: Know what? Bill: She’s in love with Kedmund. Jeb: Kedmund has stopped transmitting anyway. Kannhead also has promising data, and he is still transmitting. It’s two to one, Vall. We have to be objective. Vall: Fine, but if we strike out on Kannhead’s planet; then you may have to choose between saving kerbalkind and going home. I hope you’ll be just as objective then. Jeb: SCOTT, lay in a course for Kannhead’s. <On Kerbin, the blight has worsened. Kurph is now an adult> <Kurph and the Professor are working at the equation> Kurph: This is the 145th time that we have tried and failed at solving this thing. Professor: It only has to work once, Kurph. Kurph: Yeah, you’re right. Take 146. <Professor weakly smiles> <Khuck and his friends are working in the field> Khuck: We’re gonna lose another third this year, but next year, next year I’m gonna work over at Kelson’s. Konalson: What happed to Kelson? Khuck: Okay, let’s set fire to this junk. <Kurph is rushing through the halls of the KSP facility> KSP Doctor: Good, you’re finally here. The professor has been awfully weak. Kurph: Professor? Professor: <weakly> Kurph, I lied <cough cough> I’m so sorry. Kurph: About what? Professor: There is no hope; for anyone. Kurph: What do you mean? Professor: Plan “A”… you need more. Kurph: More what? Professor: The quantum data…from the…black hole. Do…not…go…gents...l…e… < dies> Kurph: NNNOOOOOOO!!!!! Hey, does this mean I get a promotion? <Jeb and the crew are taking Ranger 1 down to the surface of Kannhead’s> <Ranger scrapes against an ice cloud> Jeb: What was that? Vall: Ice cloud. Jeb: Kannhead’s beacon is about 2.5 km that way; firing thruster. Jeb: Okay, we’ve landed. <All get out of Ranger> <Approaching Kannhead’s compound> <Vall opens Kannhead’s door> <Jeb opens Kannhead’s hibernation pod> <Kannhead wakes up> Kannhead: Am I dead? Jeb: No, you are very much alive. Kannhead: I pray you never learn how good it can feel to see another Kerbal face again; Kazarus? Jeb: Unfortunately, I’m afraid you’re it. Kannhead: So far, surely. Jeb: I’m afraid not. In our current situation, there’s very little chance of recovering any others. Kannhead: Well, let me tell you about my world. My world, it’s cold. Gravity is a very pleasant 80% of Kerbin gravity. The days are 17 cold hours; the nights, 17 far colder hours. Up here, the atmosphere is thin ammonia, and the water is frozen. But at the surface, and there is a surface, the atmosphere gives way to oxygen and nitrogen, the ice turns in to liquid water, hydrocarbons; possibly even life. We may be sharing this world. Jeb: How far have you explored? Kannhead: I’ve mounted several major expeditions over the years. I’ve made this nifty list of samples. You guys can check it out. SCOTT: I have a message from Kendurance. It’s for you, Vall Vall: Play it, SCOTT. Kurph: <Flickers onto screen> Dr. Valentina, I’m sorry to say that your father died yesterday. He was at peace. I got a promotion. Anyway, did you know this was all a sham? There is no hope for us. Did you abandon us? Did my dad know? Did he leave us here; to starve; to suffocate? Did you? Why; Whhhhyyyyyyyyy?!?!? < Flickers off-screen> Vall: Nonsense! My father committed his whole life to plan “A”. I know nothing of this! Kannhead: I do. He solved the equation before I left. Vall: <teary> then why didn’t he use it? Kannhead: You need more. Jeb: What more? Kannhead: The quantum data from inside a black hole. However, you cannot get the data as it would involve seeing past the event horizon. Jeb: Bill, is this true? Bill: I’m afraid so. The laws of physics prohibit a naked singularity. Some things aren’t meant to be known, Jeb. Kannhead: And the professor knew that. So he planned to go ahead with the colony and work on the station to keep everyone’s hopes up. He knew it would be hard for Kerbals to forget about themselves and work to save the species. He sacrificed his own Kerbanity to keep the species alive. Jeb: NO!!! The Kerbals on Kerbin are the ones who make the sacrifice, because in his ARROGANCE he declared their case hopeless. Kannhead: Their case is hopeless. We are the future. Vall: What can I do, Jeb? Jeb: You can let me go home. You said that you had found some sites ready for colonization. So we get the base set up, and then you let me go home. Kannhead: I don’t know if these conditions will hold. <Jeb gives awkward stare> Kannhead: Then again, these flurries do usually blow by. <Jeb is working in Ranger> Bill: Jeb, I have one idea for your return voyage: Have one more crack at the black hole. You see, Kargantua is an old, spinning black hole. What we physicists call a “Gentle” singularity. Jeb: Gentle? Bill: Gentle enough that if a probe passes the event horizon, he may survive and get out. SCOTT: And when did this probe become a he? Bill: SCOTT is the obvious candidate. I can get a Lander ready for the trip by the time you get back. Jeb: Sounds great. <Jeb and Kannhead start their journey, see CHASE landing Lander> <Jeb and Kannhead walk across barren terrain> <Kannhead and Jeb walk along, pause at drop-off> Kannhead: You know, when I came here I thought I was prepared to die. But I never thought that my planet might not be the one. <Kannhead plucks Jeb’s comm device, throws it off cliff.> <Jeb gives awkward look> <Kannhead punches Jeb off cliff> <Jeb pulls Kannhead down> Kannhead: HIIIYAAAHHH!! <Jeb and Kannhead struggle.> Kannhead: I knew from day one my planet had nothing. But I knew that if I just pushed that button, someone would come and save me. For years I resisted it, but then…I lied to you Jeb, I did. All that data is bogus. We have no future here. Jeb: You coward; you stinking coward! Kannhead: Yeah, yeah. HIIIYAAAHHH!! <Jeb and Kannhead struggle, Jeb pins Kannhead.> Start triple perspective. Kurph: <To boyfriend at KSP facility> if there is any way that Jeb will transmit the quantum data, it will be at the house. I just feel it. BF: What about Khuck? Kurph: <pulls out tank of Kerosene> no problem. Let’s burn his crops. When you work at the space program, you have a handy supply of flammables. <Kannhead starts banging his helmet into Jeb’s> Jeb: Dr. Kannhead, there’s a 50/50 chance you’ll kill yourself. Kannhead: Those are the best odds I’ve had in years! <Jeb’s faceplate cracks> Jeb: NNAAAGGGHH! <Sound of air rushing> Kannhead: Jeb, I’m sorry, but I had to do this. It’s to save everyone back home; for you, and your kids. Did the Professor tell you that poem before you left? <Alternating images of Kurph burning crops and Jeb struggling> Kannhead: Do not go gentle into that good night. Old age should burn and rave at the close of day. Rage, rage against the dying of the light… I’m sorry Jeb; I thought I could watch you go through this, but I can’t, I can’t. I’m so sorry. <Kannhead mutes his speaker, flies away on jetpack > Bill: SCOTT, I want to extract more data from Kannhead’s compound, will you lend a hand? SCOTT: I don’t have hands, but I’ll help. <Jeb struggles to get his comm device> <Jeb grabs comm device> Jeb: VALL, HELP! KANNHEAD LIED! THIS WORLD HAS NOTHING! AND HE LEFT ME HERE DYING!!! Vall: What? Jeb: NO TIME!! MY FACEPLATE SHATTERED. GET ME IN THE LANDER NOW!!!! Vall: Got it. <Kurph dumps Kerosene on corn, lights it afire> Kurph: It should take some time to put that one out. I think we have 15 minutes at the house. BF: Step on it! <Khuck and friends are hanging around> Pal 1: Uh-oh, looks like some corn in Kelson’s field is burning. Pal 2: Everyone in the truck <Kurph arrives at the house> BF: Now go! We don’t have forever! <Vall flies the Lander to Jeb> Vall: Hang on Jeb, I’m coming. Try to breathe as little as possible. Jeb: Yah <ppppfffffff> yaaaaaaahhhh! <Kurph is searching for answers in her room> <Alternating scenes of Kurph, the lander, and Jeb> Vall: Jeb, I’m here! CHASE, get him. <CHASE pulls Jeb aboard> Jeb: <hyperventilating> Ahhhhhhhh!! Bill: What? This data makes no sense! <Kannhead’s view, the compound explodes. Commandeers Ranger.> CHASE: There’s been an explosion; Dr. Kannhead’s Compound! <Khuck and pals fight fire> <Kurph still looks in her room> Vall: Okay we’re here. Jeb: SCOTT, 3 o’clock! Get ready for a hard roll! Tell me when he’s aboard. <SCOTT climbs onto Lander> Vall: He’s in! Jeb: Thrusting into orbit! We can’t let Kannhead commandeer the Kendurance! SCOTT: There was an explosion. Bill did not survive. I could not save him! Khuck: Okay, the fire’s out! Back to the house! BF: Kurph, we have no time! Khuck is coming home! End Triple Perspective Vall: What happens if he takes control of that ship? Jeb: Nothing good. Does he know the docking protocol? Vall: No, but the autopilot does. CHASE: Not since SCOTT disabled it! Vall: Good job. <Kannhead comes about> Jeb: We can’t beat him. Vall: Get on the radio. Jeb: Dr. Kannhead, do not attempt docking, I repeat, do not attempt docking! <Kannhead engages autopilot> Computer: Unauthorized. Kannhead: Override. Computer: Unauthorized. <Kannhead sighs, heads over to stick> Kannhead: Jeb, I don’t care what you say. First, I am taking command of Kendurance. Then we can talk about completing the mission. <Kannhead locks imperfectly> Vall: Oh no, has he locked? SCOTT: Yeah, but imperfectly. <Vall flashes look of horror> Vall: What happens if he blows the airlock? Jeb: Nothing good. <Kannhead still locked imperfectly, opens inner door> Vall: Dr. Kannhead, do not attempt to open the airlock. I repeat, do not attempt to…<cut off> Kannhead: This is about the mission! Vall: Dr. Kannhead, listen to me! Kannhead: This is not about my life, or Jeb’s life. It’s about all Kerbalkind! There is a moment… <BOOM!!! Kendurance explodes! Play cool music. Kendurance starts spiraling down.> Vall: It is nuts…<awe>…oh my god. <Jeb squints and starts engines> <Vall gives awkward look> CHASE: There’s no point is using our fuel to chase… Jeb: Analyze the Kendurance’s spin. Vall: Jeb, what are you doing? Jeb: Docking. DUH!! <Lander chases Kendurance> CHASE: Kendurance’s spin is 21, 22 RPM. Jeb: CHASE, prepare to match our spin with the retro thrusters. CHASE: It’s not possible. Jeb: No, it’s necessary. <Lander continues chase> CHASE: Kendurance is hitting stratosphere. Vall: She has no heat shield. <Debris smashes into Lander> Jeb: CHASE, you ready? CHASE: Ready! <Jeb fiddles with stick, pulls out protein bar> CHASE: Jeb, this is no time for snacks! Jeb: SCOTT, prepare to engage the Clamp-o-Tron. <SCOTT pushes some lever> Jeb: 20 feet out… SCOTT: Jeb, I need three degrees port. <Jeb compensates> Jeb: 10 feet out… SCOTT: Jeb, we are, lined up. Jeb: Initiating spin! <Lander matches spin> <Centrifugal force pins everyone to wall> <REALLY cool music> Jeb: Come on, SCOTT. Jeb: Come on, SCOTT! <Lander locks> SCOTT: We are, locked! Jeb: Locked! Easing up! <Spin stops> Jeb: Retro thrusters! Jeb: Pushing out of orbit! Jeb: Okay, we’re out of orbit. Vall: <pant, pant> AAAAHHHHHHH!! Jeb: We don’t have enough life support or fuel to make it back to Kerbin, but we may scrape to Kedmund’s. CHASE: Jeb, we’re heading into Kargantua’s pull. Vall: Any ideas? Jeb: Yeah. So first we let Kargantua take us onto a critical orbit. Then we fire main engines. Vall: What about the time slippage? Jeb: Neither one of us has time to worry about relativity now. Vall: I’m so sorry. Jeb: Once we’ve gathered enough speed around Kargantua, we use Ranger 2 and Lander 1 as rocket boosters. Then once Lander 1 is spent, SCOTT will detach… SCOTT: …and get sucked right into that black hole! Vall: Why does SCOTT have to detach? Jeb: Well, we gotta shed the weight. SCOTT: Kewton’s third law: The only way Kerbals have ever figured out of getting anywhere is to leave something behind. Vall: You can’t make SCOTT do this for us. Jeb: He’s a robot. You don’t have to ask him to do anything. Vall: Jeb, you sucking loser. Jeb: Sorry, you broke up a little bit there. SCOTT: It’s what we intended. If I can find a way to transmit the quantum data to the people back on Kerbin, they might still make it. Vall: Let’s just hope there’s still someone left to save. <Kendurance goes around black hole. Play dramatic music> Vall: Maximum velocity achieved. Jeb: Main engines on my mark! 3…2…1, fire! <Engines fire> Jeb: Lander 1 engines on my mark, 3…2…1, fire! <Engines fire> Jeb: Ranger 2 engines, on my mark, 3…2…1, fire! <Engines fire, burn continues> Jeb: This little maneuver is gonna cost us 51 years! Vall: You don’t sound so bad for pushing 120! Jeb: WWOOOOOHOOOOOO! <Kendurance pulls out of Kargantua> <Lander 1/Ranger 2 engines shut down> Jeb: Lander 1, detach on my mark, 3…2…1. SCOTT: Detach! Vall: Goodbye, SCOTT. SCOTT: Goodbye, Valentina. See you on the other side, Jeb! Jeb: See ya there, slick! Jeb: Ranger 2, detach in 3…2… Vall: Jeb, Jeb no, what are you doing? Jeb: You have to leave something behind. Vall: Don’t! You told me we had enough resources for both of us! Jeb: We agreed Vall, 90 %.< sigh> detach. <Ranger 2 falls down> Jeb: Okay, I am nosing down, coming starboard on the event horizon, preparing to go through. It’s all black; heading into bzzp bzzzzpp <breaks up> Jeb: <continuing to self-> It’s just all black. <Ranger hit by dust> Flight computer: Eject, eject! <Jeb fiddles for ripcord> <Seat ejects, Ranger crushed by tidal gravity.> Jeb: Ohhhhhhhhhh, aaaaahhhhhhh, eeeehehhhhhhhh. <Jeb plunges into singularity> <Jeb desperately fires his thrusters, trying to get his bearings. <Jeb sees bookshelves similar to the ones in his house.> <Jeb punches on book-a-like object> <Book-a-like object falls> <Jeb sees Kurph and his broken lander> Jeb: Kurph! Kurph! <Kurph stares at bookshelf, picks up lander, walks away> Jeb: No, nooooooooo! Kurph! Ahhhhhahahaha!! <Jeb ponders for a while, and then SCOTT calls on his comm device> Jeb: SCOTT? You survived? SCOTT: Somewhere…Why did “they” bring us here? Jeb: Don’t you get it? “They” didn’t bring us here, we did! SCOTT: Jeb, Kerbals didn’t build this. Jeb: Not us, but someday… They chose her! SCOTT: For what? Jeb: To save the world! SCOTT: Why are we here again? Jeb: To find out how to tell her. The watch! That’s it! We code the data into the movement of the second hand. You have the data? SCOTT: Yup! Jeb: Feed it to me in Morse. <Jeb pushes on the watch’s “world tube” to encode the data> <Kurph finds the watch> <Kurph runs outside, meets Khuck> Khuck: You! Get out of here NOW!!!! Kurph: No, dad came back. It was him; it was him the whole time! And now he’s gonna’ save us! <Kurph translates the data> <Kurph replaces the professor’s equation with her own> Kurph: EUREKA!!!!!!!! SCOTT: Did it work? Jeb: I think so, the tesseract is closing. <Tesseract closes on Jeb> <Jeb is floating out near Jool> <Jeb wakes up in a hospital bed> Jeb: Where am I? Doctor: Take it easy Mr. Kerman. You’re 124 years old. We found you with minutes of oxygen left. Jeb: <looks out window> I asked where. Doctor: Kerman Station, currently orbiting Jool. Jeb: Nice of you to name it after me. <Doctors chuckle> Jeb: What? Doctor: It’s actually named after your daughter. Jeb: Is she still alive? <Doctor nods> Jeb: Can I see her? Doctor: She’ll be here in a few weeks. We also have something else for you, Mr. Kerman; (points to SCOTT) we found it out near Jool. Its power source was fried, but we could get you a new one. Jeb: Yes, please. Doctor: Now if you follow me, Mr. Kerman, we have something else for you. You know, I wrote a report in high school about you… <Doctor and Jeb walk into a replica of Jeb’s house on Kerbin> <Jeb is configuring SCOTT> SCOTT: General settings; Settings; Security settings; Personality settings. Jeb: New setting: Humor, 75%. SCOTT: Auto self-destruct in T-10, 9, 8… Jeb: Make that 60%. SCOTT: Hullo, this is Scott Manley here… Jeb: You want 55? <Jeb goes back to the KSP hospital> <Jeb walks into Kurph’s hospital room> Jeb: Kurph. <Kurph smiles> Jeb: It was me Kurph, I was your ghost. Kurph: I knew. Nobody believed me; they thought I was doing it by myself. But I knew…I knew you would come back. Jeb: How? Kurph: Because you still owe me twenty dollars. Dundard’s edge won in five games. Rick Kerman hit no home runs. He had 1 RBI though, if that makes you feel any better. Jeb: Here you have twenty Kerbin dollars. Kurph: I feed so complete now! Well, you should go now. I have my children for me here now. Jeb: Where? Kurph: Vall. Think of her… <Images of Vall on Kedmund’s planet> Kurph: …alone, on a strange new world. Perhaps now she’s settling in for the long nap… <Jeb steals Ranger, heads off to Kedmund’s> Kurph: … under the light of our new sun; in our new home. I N T E R K E R B O L A R Kerbalkind was born on Kerbin; It was never meant to die there.

For stock, I like minmus for easy landings and possible concentrations of frozen deserts The OPM mod ads some lovely little worlds, I like Neidon the most for its pretty blue.

My first landing was with a very top heavy lander with a mk2 lander can and a rockomax 200-x32 tank or whatever that thing is called. It had a totally overpowered booster as I was playing in sandbox mode. After many failed burns and 30 m/s landings, I crashed Jeb and Bill on the mun without any fuel. Deciding to be nice, I destroyed them with whack a kerbal instead of leaving them forever on the mun.

A most interesting design. I like the choice to use crew cabins as wings. Is it on KerbalX?

Also, How do i get reputation points?

Now, I am amazed by SpaceX's attempts to reuse rockets and eagerly await their launches. But, they have made some unrealistically optimistic plans to get people to the red planet. First, they want to land people there by 2027 or 2025. They can't even get humans to LEO yet. A mars landing in 10 years seems a bit out of reach. Second, they plan to build the giant Falcon XX rocket. If they can reuse cheap(er) little rockets like the falcon 9, a huge rocket would be pointless. Third, they want a colony of 80,000 people there by 2050. How will they get 80,000 people to fly to Mars in 35 years? To go to mars will be a huge effort by many space programs and thousands of companies, maybe 20 to 30 years from now. I don't thinks a mars run by the "little company that could" will work. SpaceX may be a valuable player in a future mars mission, but it seems unlikely that they will land permanent settlers there in a decade. Mars colonization should best be left to the SpaceX of the next century.

It would be nice if someone did a SpaceX-style landing on this thing. Wonder if it would hold. Still, great details.

I'm just getting started on the forums, and was thinking this was a pretty good first step. As for my KSP skills, I know my way around the kerbin system, and am trying some interplanetary stuff. Docking is at the upper level of my ability. Thanks to anyone who visited this post.