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Star Wars Ep. I, II and III Anti-Cheese Version


Fr8monkey

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Someone edited the prequels of Star Wars so they are less crappy.  
 

Phantom Menace:

 

Attack of the Clones:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZDlT59hqqtk

 

Revenge of the Sith:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=14tMHjDkKLA

Haven't watched them yet; but will check them out later.

Edited by Fr8monkey
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One thing I noticed about the prequels, after watching them recently, is that most of the cheesiness is caused by the voice acting (especially Anakin), but the 'visual' acting isn't too bad. How I noticed this? Well, all I did was watch them in my native language (which as been dubbed pretty well), and all the voice awkwardness was (mostly) gone! So, if your native language is not English and you want to watch the prequels with less cheesiness, you know what to do (assuming it is actually dubbed well, of course)! 

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I watched the Episode 1 edit but wasn't super fond, a lot more than just cheesiness has been removed. The whole early plot is condensed and the pacing is totally thrown off by the editing. (Though, Jar Jar's voice being replaced with generic "alien speech" and subtitles was a great idea, although it doesn't actually make any sense why he'd be tagging along with the Jedi in the first place, wasn't the original reason for that him being saved and thus having a life debt? Or something.)

Edited by NovaSilisko
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I don't have a problem with politics and romance per se, but meaningless politics (why was a trade embargo such a big deal for Naboo? they seemed to live in a lush paradise with pretty much everything they needed. Where were the starving populations? Where was the economical crisis? Where were the people dying in the streets?) and forced romance (Padme and Anakin had zero chemistry and visibly both annoyed each other). 

And how come high midichlorian count seems to be hereditary, yet Jedi are forced into celibacy. Who was the bright guy who came up with that rule? No wonder there aren't any left.

As for the light saber battles, I preferred the low key versions of the original trilogy. A lightsaber duel is as much a confrontation of the Force as it is a battle of skill. You could feel that the real fight was between their minds, which you couldn't see.

Edited by Nibb31
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2 hours ago, Nibb31 said:

And how come high midichlorian count seems to be hereditary, yet Jedi are forced into celibacy. Who was the bright guy who came up with that rule? No wonder there aren't any left.

I grinned while reading this. I suspect you watch movies the same way I do.

Best,

-Slashy

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23 hours ago, Nibb31 said:

And how come high midichlorian count seems to be hereditary, yet Jedi are forced into celibacy. Who was the bright guy who came up with that rule? No wonder there aren't any left.

*opens mouth*

*closes it*

*nods and leaves*

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Quote

Someone edited the prequels of Star Wars so they are less crappy.

The best way to do that would have been simply to have the video show a completely blank screen.......

And no, that's not a joke. The prequel movies were a vile injustice to the Star Wars franchise. They should never have been made.

Not sure I'm looking forward to Film Number Seven, either.....

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What bothers me more is if Yoda and all his pals, including Liam Neeson, anticipated Anakin to "bring balance to the Force" why didn't they light sabered him in tiny little bits as soon as they saw him?

At that point Jedi (light side) had a monopoly on the force and ruled the galaxy. "Balance" can only mean the rise of the dark side/extinction of the Jedi.

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On 1/1/2016 at 8:08 AM, A35K said:

One thing I noticed about the prequels, after watching them recently, is that most of the cheesiness is caused by the voice acting (especially Anakin), but the 'visual' acting isn't too bad. How I noticed this? Well, all I did was watch them in my native language (which as been dubbed pretty well), and all the voice awkwardness was (mostly) gone! So, if your native language is not English and you want to watch the prequels with less cheesiness, you know what to do (assuming it is actually dubbed well, of course)! 

I watched episode III as a torrented version. As it started with the titles in Cyrillic script, I assumed this version was dubbed to some Slavic language (I'm not going to say “Russian” although when it’s Cyrillic it all looks Russian to me) and then redubbed back to English with some third-party uninterested voice actors, before I found out that it had the original English dialog. That’s how bad the voice acting was. So, yeah...

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15 hours ago, Shpaget said:

What bothers me more is if Yoda and all his pals, including Liam Neeson, anticipated Anakin to "bring balance to the Force" why didn't they light sabered him in tiny little bits as soon as they saw him?

Because Anakin was protected by Plot Armor. Which even the Force can't penetrate.

In this case, his Plot Armor came from the fact that lightsabering him into tiny little bits as soon as they saw him would not only have made for a very short prequel movie, it would have undone Episodes IV through VI. And that's just not permitted.

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16 hours ago, Shpaget said:

What bothers me more is if Yoda and all his pals, including Liam Neeson, anticipated Anakin to "bring balance to the Force" why didn't they light sabered him in tiny little bits as soon as they saw him?

At that point Jedi (light side) had a monopoly on the force and ruled the galaxy. "Balance" can only mean the rise of the dark side/extinction of the Jedi.

They did not "rule the galaxy", they protected the peace.

According to someone who watched the bonus material on the RotS DVD, Lucas said that he brought balance by ending the darkness when he killed Palpatine and himself.
That he helped heavily in creating a large part of this darkness does not necessarily contradict this (similar to Matrix, in the end the Chosen One/Neo does not destroy the Matrix, but achieves some form of truce/balance), since he is not like Jesus, walking on Earth knowing he is the son of God, but just a human being and has to learn and find his destiny.
Aint I philosophical today?

Their own moral codex would most likely forbid them to kill a little boy, so they rather keep him close, since Obi-Wan was going to train him anyway.
Yoda says, that "Clouded, this boy's future is", so they do not know what will happen, how he would bring balance to the force - maybe the Force did not want them to know, so the events could come to pass exactly the way they needed to.

In disregarding what Lucas had to say, I always thought that Luke kinda was this balance - and to some extend Leia too, although she does not seem to be a (active) Force user in the sequel (for the time being). So Anakin brought balance to the Force by being Luke's father, Luke accepting his emotions and even using some of his anger (or love for his sister, if you remember the exact dialogue in the throne room scene) to defeat Vader, something that was strongly opposed by the Jedi Order. Balance could mean living a more full life, while still being a Force user, but not succumbing to the Dark Side just because by allowing yourself to have emotions. And a love life - Rey Skywalker?

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It wouldn't be the first retcon Lucas did.

My vision is to have Neeson cut up little Anakin and leave the annoying Jar Jar in the dessert to keep the even more obnoxious C-3PO some company. They would be much better characters if they just stopped appaering altogeter after Tatooine.

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Got 15 minutes for a look at Luke? (Love you Internet!)

 

Random interjection:

In German the word Luke - nouns being written capitalized like names - means hatch and can also describe an airlock etc.
So reading a Star Wars novel in German can get bumpy with sentences like "Luke cut the hatch (Luke) open with his lightsaber" ... :cool:

I get the same with English texts containing suit and suite when having to read them out loud. :P

Edited by KerbMav
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I really don't get why the prequels get so much hate. Yes, the acting wasn't great, but let's face it, the special effects and action were overall better than the originals. Say what you want, but to me, Episode III is actually better than Episode VI, much more action and it does a really good job of capturing the fall to the Dark Side. One thing I recommend is to watch the Clone Wars TV series (although a cartoon, the actual content is not far from the type in the movies), and then watch Episode III. This makes it much more effective, because in the TV series, they truly show the extent of the bond between the Clones and the Jedi (it does a very good job of showing the clones as people with feelings, rather than mindless armored guys, like they are in all the movies), as well as explaining a huge load of plot holes left by the movies, so when you watch Order 66 in III, it has much more of an effect. Also, while many might find the politics in I and II boring, I actually thought it did a very good job of explaining how the Galaxy's government actually worked, and what was going on.

Overall, the originals are still better, but the prequels really aren't that bad.

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As Einstein put it, A35K: it's all relative.

No, the prequels aren't that bad on their own. But compared to the Big Three (Episodes IV to VI) the prequels are awful. And you kinda have to have the prequels and the Big Three "next to" each other because Episodes I through III are prequels. That's why you don't screw around with trying to tack sequels or prequels or reboots onto great films. It sets the bar higher and you're more likely to miss it.

To me the story was entirely satisfactory with just Episodes IV to VI. A great story doesn't need you know every last minute detail about the universe it's told in. Rather, providing extra detail runs the risk of a common storykiller: "Too Much Detail".

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19 minutes ago, WedgeAntilles said:

To me the story was entirely satisfactory with just Episodes IV to VI. A great story doesn't need you know every last minute detail about the universe it's told in. Rather, providing extra detail runs the risk of a common storykiller: "Too Much Detail".

You might be right here ...

We already knew that Yoda trained Kenobi, who trained Anakin and fought with him in the clone wars, that Anakin was turned to the dark side by Palpatine, who overtook the Republic to make it his Empire, that Luke and Leia were seperated and hidden from their father after birth (possible plot error: Leia claims to remember her mother, which may have been a false memory or more Force magic?).

But I also think it was nice to see the story unfold - lots of cheese and stuff too, but also some of the most epic (in the sense of hilarity and actionwise) scenes for me, especially showing the Jedi in their prime: Yoda being a real Jedi master with everything that belongs to the job description, Obi-Wan and Anakin delivering actionladen lightsaber acrobatics.

And: Was it or was it not pretty mean of Obi-Wan to make Leia a princess and put Luke onto a dust ball to work as a farmer? :P

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On 3. 1. 2016 at 11:42 AM, Nibb31 said:

And how come high midichlorian count seems to be hereditary, yet Jedi are forced into celibacy. Who was the bright guy who came up with that rule? No wonder there aren't any left.

Not everyone with a high midichlorian count is a Jedi? Not every Jedi obeys the rules? I don't remember all the details, but I don't see a logical fallacy here.

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1 hour ago, Deutherius said:

Not everyone with a high midichlorian count is a Jedi? Not every Jedi obeys the rules? I don't remember all the details, but I don't see a logical fallacy here.

The logical fallacy includes half of what you said: They make up the rules of celibacy - and speculate on enough Jedi not obeying these rules to keep the resupply going?

Spoiler

Light derailment ...

Spoiler

Also, like the Nightswatch in Game of Thrones only forbids to take a wife or father children ... the Jedi Code only forbids love, romantic attachements and marriage. I leave the rest to decipher by the reader. :cool:

But Lucas has waived this clause anyway ... :wink:

http://www.avclub.com/article/george-lucas-changes-jedi-marriage-rules-after-you-218270

 

 

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6 hours ago, Deutherius said:

Not everyone with a high midichlorian count is a Jedi? Not every Jedi obeys the rules? I don't remember all the details, but I don't see a logical fallacy here.

The Jedi seemed to be actively scouting for kids with a high midichlorian count so that they could permanently abduct them and train them as Jedi. That seemed to be the regular recruitment process portrayed in Episode I, complete with a blood test and heartbreaking separation from the family. Nothing suggested that what happened with Anakin wasn't SOP for Jedi when they found that the Force was strong in a kid.

If there was a rule to scout for blue eyes to abduct them and force them to become celibate monks, if you do it properly you won't be seeing many blue-eyed kids after a few hundred years.

If the Jedi recruitment policy and the celibacy rule both worked, then there wouldn't be any Jedi left after a few hundred, which means that the combination of both was stupid.

The whole idea was silly and badly thought-out. The only reason for the celibacy rule in the plot was to make the Anakin-Padme relationship politically unacceptable.

Edited by Nibb31
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9 hours ago, KerbMav said:

(possible plot error: Leia claims to remember her mother, which may have been a false memory or more Force magic?)

Yeah, I'd call that a plot error--Leia's real mother died shortly after Leia was born, so she wouldn't have remembered her.

But she could have been remembering her adoptive mother on Alderaan, at the very end of Revenge of the Sith. This is one of the reasons "Too Much Detail" is a hazard: more detail creates more risk of the story tripping over itself.

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2 hours ago, Nibb31 said:

The Jedi seemed to be actively scouting for kids with a high midichlorian count so that they could permanently abduct them and train them as Jedi. That seemed to be the regular recruitment process portrayed in Episode I, complete with a blood test and heartbreaking separation from the family. Nothing suggested that what happened with Anakin wasn't SOP for Jedi when they found that the Force was strong in a kid.

If there was a rule to scout for blue eyes to abduct them and force them to become celibate monks, if you do it properly you won't be seeing many blue-eyed kids after a few hundred years.

If the Jedi recruitment policy and the celibacy rule both worked, then there wouldn't be any Jedi left after a few hundred, which means that the combination of both was stupid.

The whole idea was silly and badly thought-out. The only reason for the celibacy rule in the plot was to make the Anakin-Padme relationship politically unacceptable.

Fair enough, I agree that the idea is silly and counter-productive. The only other thing I can think of is the size of the universe vs size of the Jedi order - assuming only the Jedi and Sith orders are searching for the force candidates, the Jedi usually have more important bussinesses to attend to, and the Sith always stop at 1 master and 1 student.

Not that I wish to defend the idea, just trying to figure out the thought process behind it.

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