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What is the most evil thing you can do to your Kerbals?


Nick7892

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The evilest thing from a roleplay perspective is to put them in a box on the ground. They yearn for the stars! Even setting them adrift in space is not so cruel.

I have seen some intricate death machines though, usually with a rocket beneath a platform as a sort of giant grill of doom.

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It depends on what you mean by "evil". Some would consider my entire space program inherently evil because it views Kerbals as mere functional parts that at best provide only menial, unskilled labor. Thus, most astronauts are pressganged vagrants or deported prison inmates sent to do things like pump gas on Vall for all eternity. But for all that these Kerbals themselves are not valued members of society, their tasks are important to the greater good so I try not to kill them.

That said, the R&D Department has wild ideas from time to time. R&D actually means "Ruin and Destruction" and asks the usual important Science! questions like what's the best way to catapult Kerbals, how high can you launch Kerbals using only Seprtons, can the Great Panjandrum actually be made into a serviceable rover, etc.

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Make Jeb sit next to the launchpad and watch unmanned probes launch for exciting missions.

My thoughts too, but in my case it was poor Loman, that poor Kerbal sat at the launchpad in his little lander can. Forever watching launch after launch while he performed his duties inspecting the pad and runways. Each pillar of fire and smoke that went into the stratosphere and beyond burned his soul down to a dried husk cast off in the rubbish pile.

I am not cruel, he did get rewarded with a mun trip including spacewalk!

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Either it was the EVA seat spaceplane where the wings folded on me during reentry and they smacked the Kerbal out of his seat at 3000 m/s, or the takeoff of the next version where I'd put the pilot in a 'safer' position under the craft. I dragged his helmet down the runway like someone playing with matches, pulled up to a 50 degree climb, and touched off the Mainsail at full throttle. It ripped the craft apart, ejected the Kerbal, and shot him down into the dirt with enough velocity to have atmospheric effects as he went through the Mainsail's exhaust blast.

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I have a "Jeb Deletion Device" on all of my manned missions. Jeb respawning and jumping into EVERY rocket is very annoying, so I make him sit in a comfy seat and decouple him off the side. When he respawns, I repeat.

A long time ago I was VERY mean to my Kerbals.

-I launched Doodmund into Jool to see if I could land.

-I made a giant grill out of girders and engines, and had a Kerbal barbecue.

-I flung Bob into the sun.

-All of my Eve landing missions were manned. 'Nuff said.

-I didn't bother returning Kerbals, even if I had enough Delta-V.

-I used Kerbals as a source of Kethane.

-I made jet packs with seperatrons, and no parachutes.

-I made giant cannons and shot Kerbals at rockets on the pad.

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I would get a kerbal cannon, like the one used in Hocgaming's "THAT'S NO MOON BASE!" and launch a kerbal from jool's least massive moon, around jool, and straight back to the planet. That kerbal was thinking he was leaving, but he wasn't.

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