Make a wish... and have it horribly corrupted!

[Tangle]

Granted. However, the only creature you can make is a chicken.

I wish it was easier to beares.

[THENEWJOEMAMA]

Granted. It is now easier to attract bears. Giant bears.

I wish I Chekhov's Gun was used appropriately in modern-day movies.

(Chekhov's Gun is where a seemingly insignificant scene early in the story becomes critical to the plot later on.)

[BadLeo]

Granted. But movie studios become concerned only with revenue, letting aesthetic sense, interesting and well written plots and cultural value aside, thus making petty movies Oh, wait...

I wish Stanley Kubrick had survived to directed A.I. Artificial Intelligence.

[Tex]

Granted, but he died just a few days after shooting began, and they had to cast a new director.

I wish people in movies aren't so stupid when it comes to action scenes...

[BadLeo]

Granted. But they're stupid when it comes to dialogue scenes.

I wish someone makes a KSP stop motion movie.

[ZodiaK]

granted. brought to you by the creators of sweetbro and hella jeff

I wish that polan can into space

[Bioman222]

Granted, but you are executed by a Grammar Fascist for horrific grammar.

[ExplodingRocketShips]

The wish is missing, so you get a pie.

I wish that bio fought his evil twin, oib!

[CaelumEtAstra]

Granted, but he kills bio and destroys NYC.

I wish the moon was made of ice cream.

[ExplodingRocketShips]

Granted. One of the apollo missions takes home a scoop of it and it makes the astronauts sick when they eat it.

I wish that there was a new KSP Planet!

[BadLeo]

Granted, but KSP is now a F2P game and you have to pay £99,99 for it.

I wish all people in the world would have access to a good quality education system.

[CaelumEtAstra]

Granted, but earth is destroyed by a Kerbal attack cruiser.

I wish Laythe had more land.

[THENEWJOEMAMA]

Granted. It is now larger than the observable universe, and there's no way any computer could process that.

I wish it was 70 degrees.

[BadLeo]

Granted. It is seventy degrees Celsius. Are you happier now?

I wish I was less tired.

[CaelumEtAstra]

Granted, but you can't sleep for the rest of your life.

I wish warp drives existed.

[Shna_na]

Granted, driving now warps the glass on the windscreen (or whatever it's called in America).

I wish someone would crowd-fund a moonbase.

[CalculusWarrior]

Granted, but the events of Moonbase Alpha take place (including the terrible text-to-speech system)\

I wish my Eve landers worked.

[THENEWJOEMAMA]

Granted. Some heavy "lithobraking" is rquired, but you're an expert at that.

I wish my Steam download was faster.

[Tery215]

Granted. The load is down on your neck, slave.

Music player 4 .ogg files AND .mp3 files pls

[CaelumEtAstra]

Granted, but the only things it can play are annoying songs and nails on a chalkboard.

I wish Moho had an atmosphere.

[Helix935]

granted, the atmosphere s denser than Eve and due to its proximity to Kol it continously ignite and burns turning it into a fireball

i wish that i could plan maneuvers better

[CaelumEtAstra]

Granted, but the maneuvers you make and execute are constantly interrupted by the kraken.

I wish that spring would come earlier.

[Tex]

Granted. It comes two seconds earlier than it normally would've.

I wish that these people next to me would be a little more quiet.

[Tery215]

Granted. However, they reach the "perfect sound amount" and their voices are suddenly amplified to Planet-Cracking level.

I wish I could crack planets with air vibrations from my mouth.

[Shna_na]

Granted. Your Thu'um becomes so powerful that your jaw shatters. A nice image for you there.

I wish I had a thu'um.