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Make a wish... and have it horribly corrupted!


vexx32

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You wake up, and walk over to your window. As you open your window shades, you are greeted by the face of a man standing on a ladder. Everywhere you look, there is a crowd of lovers of you stretching as far as the eye can see, clambering over everything and everyone else to get in and on top of your house, and eager to snap photographs of you. A massive portion of them even want to eat your brain, because you have such good reputation, which goes hand and hand with popularity (at least in the mind of the genie who granted the wish, who interpreted "rep" as popularity), and due to them having such a like for you. You sneak over to your computer and boot it up, but find it has been hacked also by lovers of you, after the white-colored words "We love you!" appear on a black screen, instead of the windows start-up screen. You then rush over to your telescope, unscrew the front off with your bear hands (you turned your hands and feet into those of a bear with your first wish), and watch with a familiar awe as the HoloGenie 1.1.2 Hologram-form Genie's pixels form and attach. After it is in full-form, you ask the top-of-the-line, never-to-grant-more-than-three-wishes genie for another HoloGenie 1.1.2 as your third wish. This new HoloGenie is granted, and you use it to return your rep to normal, but afterwards, it malfunctions, and you lose access to the other two wishes. You basically got nothing from that wish, and your hands and feet are now permanently those of a bear, with no option to revert them back to standard hands (you planned to wish for your regular hands and feet after you toyed around with the bear hands and feet, and you knew that wishing for another genie would actually succeed, but you never predicted that the HoloGenie 1.1.2 would still have crashes, that are nonexistent for some users (like me), but occurring for others (like you). You also didn't know that the HoloGenie 1.1.2 couldn't be rebooted after a crash.).

I wish that genies were kept within telescope lenses rather than bottles.

Edited by LaytheDragon
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Granted.

I wish that hadn't darn near crashed Firefox.

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Granted...but it causes a never ending stream of bugs that takes years to iron out, leaving KSP utterly unplayable from then on.

 

I wish Valve would send me my friggen Vive already! Or at least tell me when they are planning to ship it. Be a little more specific than "Sometime in May."

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Granted. You're also trapped in a Vostok capsule without a heatshield  entering Venus's atmosphere at 60000 m/s with half of the manual as your Russian textbook.

 

I wish the space program hadn't stagnated

Edited by Andem
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Granted, but all education programs stagnate instead and the only educated people are the ones who were in the space program already.

I wish the Magellanic Clouds were visible in the northern hemisphere.

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Granted, the Magellanic cloud is in all hemispheres, because everything within the Sun's magnetic field is teleported to be orbiting the center of the Magellanic cloud. Only the genie made a computational error, and the solar system is now on an escape trajectory at 0.98 times the speed of light.

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