Make a wish... and have it horribly corrupted!

[Invadersir]

Granted but every wish you wish for requires another wish to wish for that wish.

I wish I could get this essay done

[kerbiloid]

Granted. You could. (But didn't.)

A self-explaining recursive wish.

[StupidAndy]

granted, but it doesn't explain it in your language

i wish that i could be good at civ V

[0111narwhalz]

Granted. Microsoft pushes an "upgrade" which replayes Civ V with Civ VI, and you forget to click "cancel" once too many times.

I wish for infinite, readily accessible tacos which spawn at a rate comparable to my taco consumption.

Edited November 16, 2016 by 0111narwhalz

[Kosmonaut]

They spawn in your skull case. You die.

I wish I was really good at everything.

[StupidAndy]

granted, but all the things you are good at are spontaneously warped out of exsistance

i wish that i could play baseball now  stupid winter

3 hours ago, StupidAndy said:

i wish that i could be good at civ V

I MEANT TO SAY CIV VI i dont have civ v

 

[crasher925]

granted but now no matter how hard you hit the ball and no matter what angle you hit it at it ALWAYS propells the ball to the catcher at next base

 

I wish I didnt have to sleep

[CRITAWAKETS]

Granted. But nobody plays baseball anymore.

I wish the Sa-Matra would not have been destroyed.

[kerbiloid]

Granted. Sa-Matra hadn't appeared.

I wish for machine-gun in Skyrim and for battle axe in Fallout.
_{Usually. Almost always. Kinda dialectic dualism.}

[Omegagoldfish]

Your wish is granted. Now all enemies in Skyrim have guns, and Fallout has no enemies anymore.

 

I wish for world peace.

[Kosmonaut]

Granted. Everyone in the world except for you drops dead, and there is no more conflict

I wish I had a really nice leather jacket right now

[StupidAndy]

granted, but the cow is still attached, and ALIVE!

i wish thanksgiving was tomorrow so i didn't have to go to school

[Omegagoldfish]

Thy wish is granted. However, you have nothing to give thanks for. Also you now hate your family.  

I wish to know; what is the meaning of life?

[Firemetal]

Granted but the meaning is so stupid that you suicide.

I wish I had better internet.

[TheEpicSquared]

Granted. You, your high-speed internet and your computer are time-travelled to a village in medieval Europe. Upon seeing your seemingly magical contraption, the villagers accuse you of witchcraft and you are burned at the stake. 

I wish my Swedish lessons were less boring.

[StupidAndy]

granted, but when you go to sleep the night after you finish all the lessons, you forget all you learned

i wish that people at my school liked science more and didn't avoid people who like science like a disease was sweeping through them

[0111narwhalz]

Granted. Now a disease is sweeping through them.

I wish for an arbitrarily powerful computer upon which I might play KSP, limited only by the 64-bit address space.

[Kosmonaut]

Granted. However, you get addicted to roblox, and as if that wasn't bad enough, it is the only game you play and you remove KSP from your steam library. Two days later, squad deletes KSP to work on something else, and you can never get it back, even when you grow bored of Roblox and miss KSP.

I wish I had better art skills.

[StupidAndy]

granted, but you can only draw things nobody knows/cares about

i wish i discovered KSP earlier then sometime in may this year

1 hour ago, Kosmonaut said:

Granted. However, you get addicted to roblox

me for 5 years, oh the time that was wasted, half the games are copies of other games on steam, so it can be counted as a piracy site 

 

Edited November 23, 2016 by StupidAndy

[0111narwhalz]

Granted. You discovered it on the Orbiter site in HarvestR's first post. You dismissed it as "yet another building game in space" and never looked at it again.

I wish for arbitrarily large degrees of time distortion, controllable by me, and working to both (subjectively) accelerate and decelerate time depending upon my mood.

[kerbiloid]

Granted. Youuuuu beeegiiiiinnnn to stttttt

[Overfloater]

You now have my smelly old sock under your pillow.

I wish for a piece of bread.

[Kosmonaut]

Bread? What bread? All of the grain on earth went extinct YEARS ago!

I wish to go to Duna (And return, and be famous for it)

[kerbiloid]

Granted. Baron Harkonnen takes your to Duna as a ... companion.
When he is dead, you get captured and become famous as a laboratory guinea pig for Leto II Atreides because you are the first survivor after being totally mutated.
Then Bene Gesserit return you to home, mentally and morally enslaved for all the rest of your life. (Now your home is their dungeon).
(And despite of all these disasters, you are indeed happy. You are happy every time when you remember what happened to others, especially to Overfloater...)

I wish KSP Duna had worms, too.

Edited November 27, 2016 by kerbiloid

[James Kerman]

Granted, but they are intestinal worms that you can't ride - they ride inside you.

I wish they sold uranium on ebay.