Make a wish... and have it horribly corrupted!

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but it has a Toblerone powered engine instead of a Mitsubishi Ha-43 12. While this might complicate things, at least the fuel is tasty.

I wish I owned Disney.

[Flymetothemun]

Granted, you now are faced with over 9000 pages of paperwork, including taxes, employee payroll, graphs, charts, and fine print.

I wish that I knew more QBasic code than PRINT, INPUT, _TITLE, and GOTO.

[1001sd]

Granted, now you know so much that your head explodes.

I wish for a pie.

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but its pie flavored.

I wish for a anti-gravity device.

[Flymetothemun]

Granted, the device floats away into space.

I wish somebody would find a way to make a paradox out of this sentence.

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but the paradox is broken by Doctor Who logic.

I wish that everything was like a cartoon.

[chobit-389]

Granted, I begin slapping everyone with a massive Harisen

I wish for more rockets

[ROFLCopter64bit]

Granted, SRBs from another planet (KERBIN?!) take over the world.

I wish for a mass relay.

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, it relays exactly how much mass you have to everyone, you fatty

I wish that the sky was a nice shade of purple.

[Rockcoole]

Granted. The sky is filled with Iodine.

I wish for Marvin the Paranoid Android.

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but he is paranoid and not depressed.

I wish that the Solar System was a binary star system.

[Dr. Muttonstache]

Granted. Orbits are all whack and the planets are flung into empty space.

I wish I was a woman.

[SollyK]

Granted, but you think you are a man.

I wish I had no finals.

[Mekris28]

Granted, but you never get out of school because of it.

I wish to make a wish... and have it horribly corrupted!

[SollyK]

Granted, but you can never spend a cent.

I wish I didn't have to wish.

[Dr. Muttonstache]

Granted, but you divided by zero breaking the universe(s)

I wish I could live underground.

[Flixxbeatz]

Granted. You are now an anaerobic worm.

I wish I was born a full extrovert.

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but you just end up annoying everyone around you.

I wish that the Star Wars saga actually happened.

[chobit-389]

Granted, it was a long long time ago in a galaxy far far away, thus having no effect on your life what-so-ever

I wish I lived in the 27th century

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but it is the 27 century on the Julian calendar.

I wish that I had a timey wimey machine.

[chobit-389]

Granted, hang on tight.

I wish for a cardboard cutout of John F. Kennedy

[Rockcoole]

Granted. But when you go to get it in Dallas it gets shot.

I wish for candy.

[Austrian]

Granted. At the first bite you broke three of your teeths

I wish that I become rich and powerfull.

[Flixxbeatz]

Granted, but now everyone hates you.

I wish for more birthdays.

[POTKC]

Granted. You have had 1000 birthdays and are 1000 years old.

I wish poor Kennedy had never been shot