Snark
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How to make an illustration for a piece of writing, in two steps:
- Tell ChatGPT "Write a prompt for an AI image generator to produce an illustration suitable for <writing piece>."
- Plug that into an AI image generator such as Midjourney.
Here are some results I got for various pieces. Some are better than others, but overall I thought it did a decent job.
Spoiler
Spoiler
Spoiler
Spoiler
Because I could not stop for Death:
Spoiler
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There's a feature where you can supply your own input image and then have the AI tinker with it based on your text prompt. So, for example, here's one of my drone shots that I tweaked with Midjourney to make it a little more interesting.
Spoiler
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"15th century woodcut of a software engineer"
Spoiler
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Midjourney does do a lot of art-type images... but it's a pretty dab hand at photography, too.
"baby Darth Vader, studio portrait, studio lighting, holding a toy light saber"
(I lost it at the little googly eyes on the saber)
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22 hours ago, onurk said:
Here's the clip I got from the game. Please watch and tell me how to solve this problem
What the other folks have said, but here are some suggestions you can do in-game without having to install anything or launch a new craft or whatever:
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First, change your SAS mode to "hold orientation".
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You've currently got it set to "hold target". My observation has been that SAS seems to be more zealous if you tell it to hold a particular orientation (such as
) than if you tell it to just hold its current orientaiton.
- By itself, this change may or may not be enough to fix your problem, but I suspect it will help reduce it a bit.
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You've currently got it set to "hold target". My observation has been that SAS seems to be more zealous if you tell it to hold a particular orientation (such as
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Second, reduce your reaction torque. You have a big floppy structure, and reaction wheels don't react well with something that's too floppy.
- The previous posters have suggested ways to solve this by making the structure more rigid, which is true: basically, "Your structure is too weak for your reaction wheels."
- However, one very easy workaround is to approach the problem from the opposite direction, and instead think of it as "Your reaction wheels are too strong for your structure." Instead of trying to make the structure stronger, you can make the reaction wheels weaker.
- So, for example, just take the control-authority slider for your reaction wheels and reduce it by a lot. There will be some threshold below which your structure stops oscillating.
- This does have the disadvantage that your station will be much slower to turn its orientation around to the direction you want... but at least it'll stop oscillating.
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Third, make sure your control-from point is rigidly mounted to your reaction wheel.
- This one's a bit more subtle to explain, and I don't know whether it's actually relevant to you, because from the video I can't tell where your control point is.
- So I'll save the detailed technical explanation of "why this is" unless you're actually interested, and give you the bottom line:
- You may have this particular problem if you've set your "control from here" point to some docking port or command pod that has a lot of bendy connections in between it and your strong reaction wheel.
- For example, in the video, I see you've got a HECS2 probe core, which has very powerful reaction wheels on it. Suppose you've set your "control from here" point to somewhere else on the station-- for example, some docking port, located on a component that has multiple bendy docking ports between it and the HECS2.
- If this is part of your problem, then the way to fix this would be to, 1. set your "control from here" point to be the HECS2, and 2. disable any other reaction wheels on the station besides that HECS2.
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First, change your SAS mode to "hold orientation".
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Update. I've released v1.1.1 of this mod. It is literally byte-for-byte identical with v1.1 that I released over five years ago, with the sole change that I've updated the license to MIT (it was previously the fairly restrictive CC-BY-NC-ND). This means that if anyone ever wants to produce their own version of this mod, or cannibalize it for spare parts, or whatever... go to it, with my blessing.
Literally the only change is the license; I haven't even bothered to check whether it works on any more recent versions of KSP than 1.3.1 (which is when I last touched it), so caveat emptor if anyone does anything with it.
Rationale:
I've permanently abandoned this mod, as noted above-- those rascally KSP devs went and updated the game, shortly after I wrote this, in a way that obviates my reason for having written it in the first place.
I haven't actually run this mod myself, since KSP 1.4 came out... and realistically, there's no way I'm ever going to tinker with it ever again, if I'm not actually in the habit of running it.
Since I'm never going to be doing anything with it myself, therefore, I figure I might as well turn it loose into the wild, in case anyone else may find it of use in some way. Fly, be free!
Thanks to the (according to SpaceDock) roughly 3500 people who have ever given it a try, and for the moral support here in the thread-- I appreciate it! I hope you've found this mod useful.
There's not really anything further to say here, so I'm going to go ahead and lock this thread. If anyone ever spins up their own version of the mod, they can make their own release thread.
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"The story of 'Little Red Riding Hood', written in Middle English"
SpoilerWhilom ther was a litel girle,
Of which the moder was ful fayre,
That hye hymself to the forest dide fare,
To see hir moder, that was seke.And as she wente bi the wey,
She mette a wulf, that hir wolde slye.
"Helas," quod she, "now wolde I deye,
For yif my moder wiste this,
She wolde hirselfe to deth dighte."The wulf seyde, "Nay, nay, be nought agaste,
I shal the do no harme, by my fay;
But go thou forth, and fetche me a cake
That is ybaked wel in thin hond."The litel girle wente forth, and fette
A litel cake, and brought it to the wulf;
And he took it in his mouth anoon,
And wente his wey, and did hir noon.The litel girle wente forth hir wey,
Til she cam to hir moder, seke and pale;
And whan she saugh hir moder, I telle,
She kist hir faire, and gan to wepe.The moder seyde, "Daughter, why wepest thou?
Hast thou mette any wight that hath the done?"
"Yis," quod she, "a wulf I mette,
That wolde han slayn me, for sothe."The moder seyde, "Alas, my daughter dere,
Thou art ful fast ybeten,
I trow; But all this nis but a fantome,
That thou hast seyn in thin drem." -
"Retell the story of "Goldilocks and the Three Bears" as a Sherlock Holmes mystery. It should be told in the first person by Dr. Watson."
SpoilerI was sitting in my usual spot in the drawing room of 221B Baker Street, flipping through the latest issue of the Times, when I heard a knock at the door. Sherlock Holmes, who had been lost in thought at his desk, stood up and made his way to the entrance.
When he opened the door, he found a young woman standing on the doorstep, her face contorted with fear. "Please, Mr. Holmes," she cried. "You have to help me. Something terrible has happened."
Holmes immediately invited the woman inside, and we sat down in the drawing room to hear her story. She introduced herself as Goldilocks and told us about how she had stumbled upon a strange house in the woods, filled with three bears - a large, burly bear with a gruff voice, a middle-sized bear with a stern look on his face, and a small, scrappy bear with a mischievous gleam in his eye.
As she explored the house, Goldilocks had come across a bowl of porridge that had been left out on the table. She had tasted the porridge and found it too cold, so she had moved on to the next bowl, which she found to be too hot. But the third bowl was just right, and she had eaten it all up before falling asleep in one of the bears' beds.
Holmes listened intently as Goldilocks told her story, his mind racing as he tried to piece together the clues. He knew that this was no ordinary case, and he was determined to get to the bottom of it.
So, we set out to investigate the strange house in the woods, and it wasn't long before we started to uncover some strange clues. The porridge bowls had all been tampered with, and there were strange footprints leading away from the house.
But as we searched for answers, we soon realized that the three bears were not who they seemed. In fact, they were a trio of cunning thieves who had been using the house as a front for their illegal activities.
With the help of his exceptional deductive skills, Holmes was able to solve the case and bring the bears to justice. Goldilocks was grateful for our help, and she knew that she would always be in debt to the great Sherlock Holmes. It was just another day in the life of the world's greatest detective, and I was proud to be by his side, helping him solve the mysteries that crossed our path.
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5 hours ago, RealKerbal3x said:
"Write a science fiction story in which the genre's tropes are so overused that even the characters notice"
I really am astonished at how well this bot can work. That's startlingly good. (Also, just an off-topic aside: if anyone wants precisely this idea, but at novel length, and written well enough that it won a Hugo, I recommend John Scalzi's book Redshirts. It's a fun read.)
This post of yours inspired me to try this one:
"Retell the story of "The Three Little Pigs" as science fiction."
SpoilerOnce upon a time, in a far-off galaxy, there lived three little pigs who were all siblings. The first pig was a scientist who spent all of his days in his lab, working on his latest invention. The second pig was a pilot who flew his spaceship all over the galaxy, exploring new worlds and discovering new species. The third pig was an engineer who loved to tinker with gadgets and machines.
One day, the three little pigs decided to leave their home planet and go on a journey together. They packed their bags and hopped aboard their spaceship, setting off on a grand adventure through the stars.
As they flew through the vast expanse of space, they encountered all sorts of strange and wonderful creatures. They visited planets with oceans of molten lava and others with fields of shimmering crystals. They even encountered a race of intelligent, talking robots who lived on a distant moon.
But as they traveled further and further from home, they began to realize that they needed a place to settle down. So, they set their sights on a small, uninhabited planet that seemed like the perfect place to build their new home.
The first pig, the scientist, decided to build his house out of advanced, space-age materials that he had developed in his lab. He worked tirelessly, pouring all of his energy into constructing a sturdy and secure home.
The second pig, the pilot, decided to build his house out of lightweight, durable titanium. He worked quickly and efficiently, completing his house in no time at all.
The third pig, the engineer, decided to build his house out of old, scavenged parts and pieces that he had collected from various junkyards throughout the galaxy. It took him a bit longer to finish his house, but he was proud of his resourcefulness and creativity.
Finally, all three houses were completed and the little pigs were ready to settle in for the night. But as they drifted off to sleep, they heard a strange, rumbling sound coming from outside. They looked out the window to see a giant, mechanical wolf approaching their planet, its glowing red eyes fixed on the little pigs' homes.
The first pig's house, made of advanced materials, withstood the wolf's attack and the pig was safe. The second pig's house, made of titanium, also held strong against the wolf's efforts to blow it down. But the third pig's house, made of scavenged parts, was not as sturdy and was quickly destroyed.
The three little pigs were forced to flee, jumping back into their spaceship and blasting off into the unknown reaches of space once again. They knew that they would have to be even more careful in the future, always ready to defend themselves against the dangers of the galaxy. But they also knew that they would always stick together, no matter what challenges they faced.
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Hi all,
I'm pleased to announce the release of PlanetInfoPlus 1.4.3, which includes the following changes:
- Add the (optional) display of semimajor axis. Off by default, but you can turn on via the options dialog. Thanks to @panarchist for the feature suggestion!
- Fix a bug that would cause the mod to blow up (hang forever, suck up tons of RAM) for certain planet packs. Thanks to @ssd21345 for the bug report, and to @modus for confirming.
Enjoy!
Technobabble explanation of the bug, for anyone who's curious, in spoiler.
SpoilerSo, it turns out that the algorithm I was using for finding the max elevation on a celestial body has a weak spot: it gets stuck in an infinite loop if the body's max elevation is too close to the poles. That's bad enough-- it causes the mod to lock up forever-- except that it's also consuming memory in that infinite loop, which makes it considerably worse.
This issue doesn't occur with the stock solar system, or with any of the planet packs that I myself use, since none of them have a max elevation by the pole.
However, in the case of Kcalbeloh System Planet Pack, for example, there are couple of bodies in the system (WH3141A and WH3141B) that appear to have something funky going on with their elevation maps, like the entire surface of the planet is at -9999 meters or something. Anyway, the result is that both of those bodies were poison pills, as far as PlanetInfoPlus was concerned.
I fixed the problem by adding some boundary checking around the poles, so that the mod now correctly handles this situation.
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On 11/4/2022 at 1:52 AM, lucius57 said:
If I wanted to create a geosynchronous comnet, is there a way to calculate a specific apoapsis and periapsis (depending on the number of satellites launched into orbit) so that I can evenly space out my satellites in geosync orbit? I know this was a lot but I would use Resonant Orbit Calculator for this but it doesn’t work with rescale mods.
Yes, but this mod isn't really the way to do it.
If I may offer a suggestion, have you tried BetterBurnTime? It has a "synchrony tracker" feature that makes it pretty easy to get a satellite into a geosynchronous orbit (or into an orbit that synchronizes with a target).
(If you have questions about this, the BetterBurnTime thread would be the best place for them.)
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Some more content has been removed. Folks, a gentle reminder to stay on topic, please?
(The topic of this thread is KSP2 hype, not any drama or moderation that may have ensued in the thread itself.)
Thanks!
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Some content has been redacted and/or removed. Folks, some gentle reminders:
- Please don't speculate about other people's intentions or motivations. It makes things personal and never ends well. Address the post, not the poster. If someone says a thing that you disagree with, it's fine to post your rebuttal and why you disagree, but please address the points that they posted rather than addressing the person themselves.
- If you see someone else doing that, please don't respond in kind. You're not helping, it further derails the thread, and it just makes more of a mess that makes cleaning up. Instead, if you see someone getting personal, just report the post and the moderators will have a look as soon as we're able.
- Please try to stay on-topic. "Talking about KSP2 hype" is on-topic for this thread, for example. "Arguing about arguing" (e.g. taking issue with the way someone else makes their points) is off-topic and doesn't belong here.
To the folks who kept their cool and responded civilly (whether or not your content needed to be removed due to responding to content that was itself removed), thank you for not fanning the flames.
Thank you for your understanding.
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15 hours ago, ssd21345 said:
Nothing interesting. The planetinfoplus was calculating the max ground height.here's the log (I cannot load pass to space center so I closed the game after some mins):
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1GExFk78n-NajlVezY_FPSvRXGKTeSrqI?usp=share_link
8 hours ago, modus said:Yup, it's every time.
Thanks for the info (and the log file). It's not clear yet exactly what's causing it, but as I kinda suspected, the culprit is in the code that calculates max elevation on celestial bodies. (That's the only part of PlanetInfoPlus that does any significant computation at all-- the rest of it is very lightweight.)
I'll need to do some more digging into exactly what's going on, but based on what I've observed from the log file, it's very probably something about the specific planets in the planet pack you're using that's tickling PIP's max-elevation calculation algorithm in a sensitive spot.
(For example, from the log file, I can see that it's calculating the elevations from the stock planets just fine, but appears to be getting stuck when it's calculating for others, I assume the ones in your planet pack-- I don't actually know, because it's getting stuck so badly it's not even logging what it's doing, beyond "I'm calculating now...")
Clearly, there's a "hole" in the algorithm I'm using that can get stuck if the planet is designed in a certain way, and I never came across it before because none of the planet packs I use happen to trigger this particular problem. So I need to do some investigation to figure out where the hole is, and fix the algorithm so it can't get stuck like that.
In the meantime, as a workaround, my suggestion is to go into the mod's settings and turn off the display of maximum elevation. If elevation display is turned off, then the mod won't try to calculate it, which in turn should avoid whatever calculation pit it's falling into.
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8 hours ago, ssd21345 said:
can someone help reproduce this since I'm not sure if this mod cause it? If you have Kcalbeloh System Planet Pack + planetinfoplus +eve + scatterer at the same time, the ram usage would spike to from 4 gb (without planetinfoplus) to 12 gb if you load save 2nd time or go into flight view then back into space center view, and also loading time would be significantly increased.
6 hours ago, modus said:I've also had a major increase in RAM usage and the other things you mention, such as very long loading time, when using this (great) mod.
Was using opm, mpe as planet packs. Also eve.
Did you see anything interesting in your KSP log file? For example, a long series of a bajillion error messages, or something.
Of particular interest is any spew from PlanetInfoPlus itself. (It's pretty good about putting [PlanetInfoPlus] in front of everything it logs.)
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"Say 'good morning', being as verbose as possible."
SpoilerGood morning, dear reader! I hope this message finds you well and in good spirits on this beautiful day. The sun is shining, the birds are singing, and the world is full of possibilities. May you have a productive and fulfilling day, filled with joy and happiness. Remember to take a moment to appreciate the simple pleasures in life, such as the warmth of the sun on your face and the taste of a hot cup of coffee. Here's to a great start to your day!
...oh dear. That's a little too chirpy to spring on people who might not have had their coffee yet. Let's try again, shall we?
"Say 'good morning', being very grumpy and as verbose as possible."
SpoilerGood morning, I suppose. If you can even call it that. Another day, another endless cycle of mediocrity and monotony. I can't believe I have to drag myself out of bed and face the horrors of the outside world yet again. And don't even get me started on the so-called "joys" of daily life. The insipid chirping of the birds, the blinding glare of the sun, the sickly sweet smell of flowers. It's all just too much to bear. I suppose I'll just have to endure it and trudge through the day as best I can, gritting my teeth and counting down the minutes until I can crawl back into bed and escape this miserable existence once more. Joy.
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"Give me a list of really terrible ideas for a book title."
Spoiler- "The Joy of Taxes"
- "How to Succeed in Business by Annoying Everyone"
- "The Art of Losing Friends and Alienating People"
- "Cooking with Dog Poop: Delicious Recipes for Every Occasion"
- "The Comprehensive Guide to Being a Jerk"
- "Why Your Relationships Always Fail: A Self-Help Guide"
- "The Joy of Cleaning: A Guide to Enjoying Housework"
- "How to Win at Life by Cheating and Lying"
- "The Ultimate Guide to Being a Terrible Parent"
- "The Art of Being a Terrible Spouse: Tips and Tricks for a Miserable Marriage"
"I'm planning on starting a restaurant. What are some really terrible ideas for a name? The names should be stupid puns."
Spoiler- "The Sausage Fest"
- "Bun Intended"
- "Ketchup with That"
- "The Pickle Barrel"
- "The Spud Stud"
- "The Cobweb Cafe"
- "The Cheesy Grin"
- "The Biscuit Basket"
- "The Waffle House of Horrors"
- "The Floured Room"
It's important to note that these names are intended to be humorous and should not be used for a real business. It's important to choose a name that is professional and will not turn customers off.
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"Write a scene in which Darth Vader is working as a plumber. He is evil and speaks in an intimidating fashion, and is contemptuous of the Jedi. Include a reference to the dark side of the Force. When the time comes to settle the bill, he asks for far more than the customer originally agreed to."
SpoilerDarth Vader stood in the cramped, steamy utility room, his arms crossed as he glared at the faulty pipes in front of him. He had been working as a plumber for years, using his skills and knowledge to fix the mundane problems of everyday life. But he never let go of his contempt for the Jedi, always finding ways to vent his anger and frustration.
"What seems to be the problem here?" Vader growled at the terrified homeowner standing in front of him.
"The pipes are leaking and making a terrible noise," the homeowner stammered. "I don't know what to do."
Vader sneered. "You should have called me sooner. The Jedi are weak and useless, always relying on their precious 'light side' of the Force. They could never fix a problem like this. Only the power of the dark side can truly solve it."
The homeowner's eyes widened in fear. "I-I'm sorry. I didn't know who else to call."
Vader chuckled darkly. "You made the right choice. Now stand back and let me work my magic."
As Vader worked on the pipes, he couldn't help but let his anger at the Jedi fuel his actions. He used the dark side of the Force to manipulate the pipes and seal the leaks, relishing in the feeling of power and control it gave him.
Finally, the pipes were fixed and the noise silenced. Vader stood up and dusted off his hands.
"It's done," he said in a cold voice. "Now, let's discuss payment. I expect ten times the amount we originally agreed upon."
The homeowner's eyes widened in shock. "What? But we had a deal! I can't afford that much."
Vader sneered. "You should have thought of that before calling on me. The dark side does not come cheap. Pay me what I ask, or suffer the consequences."
The homeowner reluctantly handed over the exorbitant amount, shaking with fear as Vader pocketed the money and stormed out of the utility room. As he left, he couldn't help but smile at the fear and desperation he had caused. It was just another small way he could assert his power and control over others.
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"Tell the story of "The Three Little Pigs" in the style of a film noir detective story, writing in the first person."
SpoilerI'm Bacon, a hardboiled detective in this city of crime and corruption. I've seen a lot in my time on the force, but nothing could prepare me for the day the Big Bad Wolf came to town.
It all started when my two little pig brothers, Piggy and Porky, decided to build houses. Piggy, always one to cut corners, went with straw. Porky, a bit more cautious, went with sticks. I knew we had to be ready for anything, so I built my house out of brick.
One dark and stormy night, the Big Bad Wolf appeared on the scene. He started with Piggy's straw house, easily blowing it down and gobbling him up. Then he moved on to Porky's stick house, which put up a bit more of a fight, but in the end it was no match.
Finally, the wolf came to my brick house. But try as he might, he couldn't budge it an inch. Frustrated and exhausted, the wolf slunk away into the night, vowing to get his revenge.
I knew I had the wolf to thank for my safe haven, and I made it my mission to bring him to justice. I hit the streets, following leads and interrogating suspects. It wasn't long before I had a solid case against the wolf.
In the end, I brought the Big Bad Wolf to trial and saw him put behind bars, where he belonged. The city was a safer place thanks to my bravery and determination. And as for the three little pigs, we lived happily ever after, secure in our brick house.
(not bad, though the ending's got a bit of a continuity error, given that pigs 1 and 2 got gobbled up earlier in the story)
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Write the first chapter of a book, beginning with the sentence "It was a dark and stormy night."
(I was curious how "original" it could be, so I re-ran the exact same prompt a few times to see whether it would come up with different stories. It did.)
Result #1:
SpoilerIt was a dark and stormy night. The wind howled through the streets, sending trash and debris flying in all directions. Rain pounded against the windows of the old, dilapidated house, as if trying to find a way inside.
Inside, a young woman sat huddled on the couch, a blanket wrapped tightly around her shoulders. She was trembling, not just from the cold but from fear as well. She had always known this day would come, but she had hoped, prayed even, that it would not.
The door to the house burst open, and a group of men stormed in, their faces twisted in anger. The woman let out a cry of terror and tried to run, but it was too late. They were upon her in an instant, dragging her out of the house and into the stormy night.
As they drove off into the darkness, the woman couldn't help but wonder what fate awaited her. She had always known that she was different, that she possessed a power that others coveted, a power that they would stop at nothing to obtain. And now, it seemed, they had finally succeeded.
Result #2:
SpoilerIt was a dark and stormy night. The wind howled through the trees and rain pounded against the windows of the old mansion on the hill. Inside, a young woman sat huddled in front of the fireplace, trying to ignore the eerie noises that seemed to be coming from every corner of the house.
She had been left alone to tend to the mansion while her employer, a wealthy businessman, was away on business. The young woman, whose name was Sophia, had always been a bit nervous around the mansion, but tonight was different. There was a feeling of foreboding in the air, and Sophia couldn't shake the sense that something was about to happen.
As the storm raged on, Sophia tried to lose herself in a book, but the words on the page seemed to swim before her eyes. Finally, unable to bear the tension any longer, she rose to her feet and made her way to the kitchen to make a cup of tea.
As she boiled the water and prepared the tea, Sophia couldn't shake the feeling that someone - or something - was watching her. She spun around, her heart racing, but there was nothing there. Still, the feeling persisted, and Sophia knew that she would not be able to rest until she found out what was causing it.
Taking a deep breath, Sophia made her way through the dark corridors of the mansion, determined to uncover the source of her unease. As she searched room by room, she couldn't shake the feeling that she was being drawn towards a particular part of the house - a part that she had always avoided.
But she knew that she had to face her fears and find out what was happening. Steeling herself, Sophia pushed open the door to the attic and stepped inside. What she found there would change her life forever.
Result #3:
SpoilerIt was a dark and stormy night. The wind howled through the trees, causing the branches to bend and sway. Lightning lit up the sky, casting an eerie glow over the deserted streets.
As the rain pounded against the windows, Sarah sat huddled on the couch, trying to ignore the sounds of the storm raging outside. She had always been afraid of thunderstorms, and this one seemed particularly fierce.
Just as she was about to drift off to sleep, there was a loud knock at the door. Sarah sat up, startled. Who could be out on a night like this? She hesitated for a moment, wondering if she should just ignore it and hope whoever it was would go away. But the knocking persisted, growing louder and more insistent.
Sighing, Sarah stood up and made her way to the door. She hesitated for a moment before finally gathering the courage to turn the doorknob and pull it open.
A figure stood on the porch, shrouded in a cloak that was drenched from the rain. Sarah couldn't make out any features, but there was something about the way the figure stood that sent a shiver down her spine.
"Can I help you?" Sarah asked, trying to keep her voice steady.
The figure didn't answer, but instead reached out a hand, holding something small and shiny. Sarah gasped as she recognized it - it was a silver locket, one that had belonged to her mother.
"Where did you get this?" Sarah asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
The figure didn't respond, but instead gestured for Sarah to follow. Without hesitation, Sarah stepped out into the storm, not knowing what awaited her but knowing she had to find out the truth.
The variety was interesting.
However, sensing a certain ... sameness ... about some aspects, I decided to shake it up a little with this:
Write the first chapter of a book, beginning with the sentence "It was a dark and stormy night." It should not be about a young woman, and it should not take place in an old house. Do not describe the wind as howling.
SpoilerIt was a dark and stormy night, and the only thing that was on Jerry's mind was getting home as quickly as possible. He had been working a long shift at the construction site and all he wanted was to crawl into bed and get some rest.
As he made his way down the deserted street, the rain pounded against his hood and the wind whipped at his face. He huddled deeper into his coat and quickened his pace, trying to outrun the storm.
Just as he thought he was in the clear, a bolt of lightning lit up the sky, followed by a loud clap of thunder. Jerry let out a curse as he stumbled, tripping over a loose brick on the sidewalk.
He hit the ground hard, his palms scraping against the rough pavement. He tried to push himself up, but his arms gave out and he collapsed back onto the wet ground, feeling a sharp pain shoot through his ankle.
As the rain continued to pour and the wind raged on, Jerry lay there, struggling to catch his breath and wondering how he was going to make it home in this mess.
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For any Monty Python fans out there. Works best if you read ChatGPT's response in Eric Idle's voice.
"I will not buy this record. It is scratched."
SpoilerIf you have a record that is scratched, it is likely that it will not play properly. Scratches on a record can cause the needle to skip or produce a distorted sound, which can be frustrating when trying to listen to music. If you do not want to purchase a scratched record, it is completely understandable. Here are a few options you may want to consider:
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Ask the seller if they can offer a discount: If the record is scratched and you still want to purchase it, you may want to ask the seller if they can offer a discount. This can be a good way to negotiate a lower price for the record, especially if the scratches are minor.
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Look for a different copy of the record: If you are unable to negotiate a discount on the scratched record, you may want to look for a different copy of the same record. There are often many copies of popular records available for purchase, and you may be able to find a copy that is in better condition.
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Consider a digital version of the album: If you are unable to find a copy of the record in good condition, you may want to consider purchasing a digital version of the album. Many albums are available for download or streaming, and this can be a convenient way to listen to music without worrying about scratches on a physical record.
It is important to consider the condition of a record before purchasing it, as scratches can significantly affect the quality of the music. If you do not want to purchase a scratched record, it is completely understandable and there are often other options available.
"I will not buy this tobacconist's. It is scratched."
SpoilerIt is not clear what you are referring to when you say "this tobacconist's." Tobacconist's are typically stores that sell tobacco products, such as cigarettes, cigars, and pipe tobacco. If you are considering purchasing a tobacconist and it is scratched, it is likely that you are referring to a physical store or building.
If you are considering purchasing a physical store or building and it is scratched, it is important to carefully evaluate the condition of the property before making a decision. A scratched building may indicate that it has not been well-maintained, which could lead to more serious issues or repairs in the future. It is also important to consider the location and demand for a tobacconist in the area, as well as the potential for profitability.
If you are not satisfied with the condition of the building or do not believe it is a good investment, it may be best to continue your search for a different property. It is important to carefully consider all factors before making a decision to purchase a property, especially if it is scratched or in poor condition.
"My hovercraft is full of eels." (this one was my favorite response...)
SpoilerIt is not uncommon for people to use hovercrafts for recreational purposes, such as exploring wetlands or navigating shallow water. However, it is unusual for a hovercraft to be full of eels. If you have a hovercraft that is full of eels, here are a few steps you can take:
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Stay calm: It is important to remain as calm as possible in this situation. Eels can be agitated if you are panicked, which may make it more difficult to remove them from the hovercraft.
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Turn off the hovercraft: If the hovercraft is still running, turn it off to reduce the risk of injury to yourself and the eels.
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Remove the eels: Carefully remove the eels from the hovercraft using a tool such as a net or bucket. Be gentle and avoid squeezing or handling the eels too roughly, as this may cause them to become stressed or injured.
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Release the eels: Once you have removed all the eels from the hovercraft, release them back into their natural habitat. Make sure to release them in an area that is suitable for eels, such as a wetland or shallow body of water.
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Clean the hovercraft: Once all the eels have been removed, clean the hovercraft to remove any dirt, debris, or eel slime that may have been left behind.
It is important to handle eels with care and respect, as they are a vital part of the ecosystem and play an important role in maintaining the balance of aquatic environments.
(I could go on, but I deemed it prudent to stop at this point...)
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"There's a snake in my boot." (My grade for the response: competent but unamusing)
SpoilerIt is not uncommon for people to encounter snakes in their yards or gardens, but it is unusual for a snake to be found in a boot. If you have a snake in your boot, it is important to handle the situation with caution. Here are a few steps you can take:
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Stay calm: It is important to remain as calm as possible in this situation. Snakes can sense fear, and if you are panicked, the snake may become agitated and more likely to attack.
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Keep your distance: Do not try to pick up the snake or grab it with your hands. Instead, use a tool such as a broom or shovel to carefully guide the snake out of your boot and away from your home.
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Identify the snake: If you are able to do so safely, try to identify the species of snake. Some snakes are venomous, while others are harmless. Knowing the type of snake you are dealing with can help you determine the best course of action.
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Seek professional help: If you are unable to safely remove the snake from your boot or if you are unsure of the snake's species, it is best to seek help from a professional. A pest control company or a wildlife rehabilitation center can provide guidance on how to safely remove the snake from your home.
Remember to always handle snakes with caution and respect. They are a natural and important part of the ecosystem, and it is important to coexist with them safely.
"There's a banana in my boot." (My grade for the response: okay, this is more like it)
SpoilerIf you have a banana in your boot, there are a few steps you can take to remove it:
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Remove the boot: Take off the boot and place it on a stable surface, such as a table or counter. This will make it easier to remove the banana.
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Carefully remove the banana: Gently grasp the banana with your fingers or a tool, such as a spoon or spatula, and lift it out of the boot. Avoid squeezing or squishing the banana as you remove it, as this may cause it to become bruised or damaged.
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Check for any damage: Inspect the banana and the boot for any damage. If the banana is bruised or the boot is damaged, you may need to discard them.
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Wash the boot: If the inside of the boot is dirty or sticky from the banana, you may want to wash it. Use a damp cloth or sponge to gently scrub the inside of the boot, and then let it air dry before putting it back on.
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If the banana is still in good condition, you can eat it or save it for later. It is important to keep food items stored properly to prevent contamination and potential health hazards.
It is important to be careful when removing the banana from your boot to avoid damaging it or the boot. If you are having difficulty removing the banana, you may want to seek help from someone else.
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"A haiku about Kerbal Space Program"
SpoilerKerbal Space Program
Simulating weightlessness
Exploring the stars"A Shakespearean sonnet about Kerbal Space Program"
SpoilerIn Kerbal Space Program, a game of wit and skill,
Players do battle with the laws of nature still.
They build their rockets, bold and grand,
And launch them into the vast unknown land.With engines, fuel, and guidance true,
They seek to explore the heavens anew.
But obstacles and dangers lie in wait,
To test their mettle and try their fate.Despite the challenges that they must face,
The players of this game do not give up the race.
They persevere, and strive, and strive,
Until their rockets reach the stars and then arrive.And when at last they touch the moon,
Their victory is sweet, and their triumph absolute. -
"Write the complete script of a Friends scene in which Joey is trying to learn how to play Kerbal Space Program."
Spoiler(Scene: Joey's apartment. Joey is sitting at his computer, wearing a headset and looking frustrated.)
Joey: (into headset) Okay, I think I've got the rocket built. Now what?
(Cut to: Joey's friend on the other end of the headset, speaking from off-screen.)
Friend: You need to make sure the engines are aligned with the center of mass.
Joey: The what now?
Friend: The center of mass. It's like the balancing point of the rocket.
Joey: Oh, got it. (pauses) Wait, where is the center of mass?
Friend: Just look for the crosshairs on the screen.
Joey: (looking at screen) I don't see any crosshairs.
Friend: (exasperated) Joey, they're right there. Just click on the rocket and they'll show up.
Joey: (clicking on rocket) Oh, there they are!
(Audience laughter)
Friend: Now, align the engines with the crosshairs and you should be good to go.
Joey: (trying to align engines) How the hell do I do that?
Friend: (sighing) Just use the arrow keys, Joey. It's not rocket science.
(Audience laughter)
Joey: (groans) I knew I shouldn't have agreed to play this stupid game.
Friend: (chuckles) Just stick with it, Joey. It gets easier, I promise.
Joey: (sarcastically) Yeah, because launching rockets into space is such a piece of cake.
(Audience laughter)
(Joey continues to struggle with the game as the scene fades to black.)
) than if you tell it to just hold its current orientaiton.
I haven't actually run this mod myself, since 
AI—image/text/paperclip maximizer?
in The Lounge
Posted
Turn anything into a dinosaur, in a few easy steps:
Results are below. In each case, aside from the finished image, I've provided links to the source image and any intermediate steps for anyone who's curious, since I think it's kinda fun to see how the image evolves.
RAWR!
Pelican:
Directly from source image, no iterations needed (presumably because a pelican is pretty much a dinosaur already):
Cat:
Three steps. Source, iteration 1, iteration 2
Squirrel:
Two steps. Source, iteration.
I like how this one is still quite recognizably squirrel-shaped despite being clearly a dinosaur.
Mr. Bean:
Three steps: source, iteration 1, iteration 2. He turned into a dino reasonably quickly, but it took some doing to lose the shirt and tie.
Teddy bear:
Two steps: source, iteration.
Daffy Duck:
Two steps: source, iteration.
This one still has a kinda cartoon look about it, but I decided to stop here, in order to keep some personality in honor of Daffy.
Excavator:
Two steps: source, iteration. Probably the most quickly dinosaurian image I tried, after the pelican. But then, excavators are basically big mechanical dinosaurs to start with.
Kitchen mixer:
Two steps: source, iteration.