More Kerbal Food Items!

[The Optimist]

Come on guys, we need more food for our poor kerbonauts. Just think of poor Jeb subsisting on the exact same prepackaged meal during the entire 3-year trip to [REDACTED]

Edited July 10, 2016 by The Optimist

[electricpants]

Oh! I gotsa fud!

Name: Veggie Mix

Company: Smith's Laundry Products Co.

Source: A mix of Dirty laundry Fresh vegetables that we found in a dumpster, crushed into a toothpaste tube.

Backstory: A long time ago, we decided to go on strike and not wash our dirty clothes, and they just piled up over the years, until we decided that we should try to make a food product! So we crushed all those clothes into a toothpaste tube and called them vegetables.

Type: "Chemically treated" paste

Meal Designation: Never Breakfast

Meal Type: Vegetables (?)

Edited July 10, 2016 by electricpants

[KSK]

OK, I'm in.

Name of product:   NERF

Company sourced by:  Found lying by the side of the road.

Source:  Safer not to speculate.

A bit of backstory:  NERF - exactly what it says on the tin - we presume. The few scuffed, battered and generally dented cans we found by the side of the road had no discernable manufacturer name on them. Commonly believed, within the kerbonaut corps, to be short for Not Even Really Food.

Type:  Processed. Heavily processed.

Meal designation 1: At consumer's own risk.

Meal designation 2: Mystery.

[DaElite101]

Name: Mintmus Space Cream

Company: Mint-E Aerospace 

Source: Minmus's Ice Plains

Backstory: After an astronaut found out that Minmus was not made of delicious dessert products and did not taste good, he put it in a blender with some rocket fuel, salt, and ice. After replacing a normal booth's mint ice cream with the space cream, they noticed no side effects that customers might have had. Mint-E Aerospace also noticed a 68.7% increase in sales from the booth.

Type: Ice Cream (May contain frozen bacterium and microbes of unknown origin)

Meal Designation: Dessert

Meal Type: Ice cream/Snack/SPF-50/Electrical Sealant

[Crocket]

Name: Dehydrated Space-efficient Meal (aka Space Sandwiches)

Company: Spacelicious Snack Company

Source: In the back of the CEO's fridge between a year-old cheese block and a suspicious-looking skull

Backstory: Following a Spring Cleaning forced by his wife, Spacelicious CEO Sigsy Kerman found some dehydrated sandwiches wrapped in tin foil in the back of his fridge and thought it would make good space food, so he patented the design and began selling it. Comes in five flavors: Ham and Cheese, Turkey and Cheese, Peanut Butter and Jelly, Bleu Cheese, and Mystery Mold.

Type: Sandwich

Meal Designation: Any meal you eat food in! WARNING: Consumption of more than one Dehydrated Space-efficient Meal over a 43-hour period may cause adverse effects.

Meal Type: Any type, may also be used as hull component

[limeyptwo]

Name: Delicious Green Liquid Substance

Company: Jebediah Jr.'s Food Works

Source: Fast food4 star Kitchelin Rated Chef Jebediah Kerman Jr.

Backstory: When Jebediah Jr.'s father took him on a trip to Jool, he discovered that the gas of its atmosphere has a sweet, citrusy taste. So, when he became a chef, he made a soda out of it. (WARNING: DO NOT EXPOSE FUEL TO THIS PRODUCT)

Type: Carbonated Drink

Meal Designation: Lunch, dinner, or dessert

Meal Type: Any

[MaxL_1023]

Name: Spaceborne Nutrients Adapted for Consumption by Kerbals

Company: Somewhat Questionable Utility Acquisitiors of Digestables

Source: Somewhere Beyond Eeloo

Backstory: When Jebediah Kerman strapped on one too many strap-on boosters, our probe intended for a not-at-all nefarious exploration of that which lies beyond Kerbin was thought to have escaped Kerbol entirely. Happily, it returned some time later covered in this mysterious substance. Always looking to cut costs, our provisioning department discovered that with some minimal packaging and liberal application of starvation, this material is quite suitable for Kerbal Consumption. It is now included on every crewed vessel. 

Type: Potentially Prebiotic 

Meal Designation: All

Meal Type: Unknown Organic Slurry 

[KAL 9000]

Name: Kerby Krisp 

Company: Duna Inc.

Source: [REDACTED] 

Backstory: When Kerbals started complaining about the lack of candy onboard spacecraft, Duna Inc. seized the opportunity and invented the Kerby Krisp, a spaceworthy snack for all to enjoy.

Type: Candy

Meal Designation: All

Meal Type: [REDACTED]

[Andem]

Name: Standard Snack Pack (S.S.P.)

Company: Blade Enterprises

Source: BE Black Lab

Backstory: Tastes good yes? Smile harder, Sergei. SMILE HARDER!

Type: Junk Food

Meal Designation: Snack

Meal Type: Something Vaguely Edible.