Kerbal Anatomy

[Casualnaut]

We focus too much on what Kerbals do, instead of what they are. We must discover what really is a Kerbal. Feel free to create a species tree of how our little green buddies came to be. 

And no, Matt Lowne's Expedition Eve explanation of how Kerbals came to Kerbin does not count. 

[NSEP]

My theory is that Kerbals actually lived underground after disaster struck Kerbin. And then a bunch of brave Kerbals decided to go outwards and find a new home. Thats where KSP came from.

As for their biology. They probably use a photosynthesis like method of generating food and and a cactus like way of storing water. 

[Ty Tan Tu]

I think it all can be explained with the help of H. P. Lovecraft. When Kerbin was still new, the Elder Things colonizing the planet about one billion years ago. The Elder Things were somewhere half way between animal and plants and capable of hibernating for millions of years. The Elder Things created most life forms on Kerbin simply to assist them in their colonization of the planet, which will ultimately lead to a human like race on Kerbin. But I get ahead of myself. After millions of years ruling Kerbin uncontested, other species arrived, most notable Cthulhu (represented by the Kraken in KSP) and the Deep Ones who are sort of frog like beings that live mostly beneath the sea but are amphibious.. Great wars were fought.

Over the countless millenniums the alien civilizations declined. The last Elder Ones city was far to the south where the happy face can still be seen. Long ago having forgotten their animosity, the Deep Ones interbreed with the Elder Things given the Deep Ones plant like features and the ability to hibernate for long long periods of time.

While all this is going on, one of the life forms the Elder Ones created evolved into human like creatures. The hybrid Elder Things/Deep Ones interbreed with the humanoids ("The Shadow Over Innsmouth" (1931)). Another dark age ensues in which all knowledge of their alien origins is lost. The current Kerbils have the plant like part of the Elder Ones, The frog like look of the Deep Ones, and the insipid stupidity of the humanoids.

[dangerhamster]

They originated on the planet Meme in the Comic system.

[Geonovast]

I have a feeling they're built a lot like Kif from Futurama.

[RoadRunnerAerospace]

Well, they (probably) use photosynthesis to generate food, hence the non-requirement for food.... but snacks on the other hand.... Probably live best in a CO2 atmo. There was a abundance of life on kerbin, until two things happened, they hunted many species to extinction , and a massive solar outburst from kerbol killed off the rest, forcing the kerbals to live underground, and wear space suits on the surface

[Snark]

40 minutes ago, RoadRunnerAerospace said:

Well, they (probably) use photosynthesis to generate food

Alas, the math on that just doesn't work out; there's simply not enough energy available from photosynthesis to fuel a critter that can move around on its own power.  And by "not enough," I mean not enough by orders of magnitude, even if you make some very generous fictitious assumptions about the efficiency of kerbal photosynthesis, or the radiant flux of their sun.

There's a reason why plants have elaborate fractal shapes and very thin leaves to generate scads and scads of surface area for the least possible biomass, while having a metabolism so slow (relative to animals) that they just sit there unmoving.  And why the biomass of plants in any ecosystem has to be many orders of magnitude bigger than the biomass of animals that it can support.

Photosynthesis is hard.

[Tex_NL]

http://www.kerbalcomics.com/2013/03/02/episode-21-its-just-a-theory-anyway-right/

[RoadRunnerAerospace]

34 minutes ago, Snark said:

Alas, the math on that just doesn't work out; there's simply not enough energy available from photosynthesis to fuel a critter that can move around on its own power.  And by "not enough," I mean not enough by orders of magnitude, even if you make some very generous fictitious assumptions about the efficiency of kerbal photosynthesis, or the radiant flux of their sun.

There's a reason why plants have elaborate fractal shapes and very thin leaves to generate scads and scads of surface area for the least possible biomass, while having a metabolism so slow (relative to animals) that they just sit there unmoving.  And why the biomass of plants in any ecosystem has to be many orders of magnitude bigger than the biomass of animals that it can support.

Photosynthesis is hard.

could they be generating some of their food from photosynthesis, and supplementing the rest with their "snacks"? 

Edited July 24, 2017 by RoadRunnerAerospace

[suicidejunkie]

Just now, RoadRunnerAerospace said:

could they be generating some of their food from photosynthesis, and supplementing the rest with their "snacks"? 

It is photosynthesis, but in a nuclear sense rather than chemical.  Solar-catalyzed fusion which works best with their snack pellets to allow hyperactivity.

This also explains why they can survive almost indefinitely, but will become upset and frequently go napping/on strike when snacks are unavailable.

[RoadRunnerAerospace]

2 minutes ago, suicidejunkie said:

 

 but will become upset and frequently go napping/on strike when snacks are unavailable.

That does sound very kerbal......

[Snark]

12 minutes ago, RoadRunnerAerospace said:

could they be generating some of their food from photosynthesis, and supplementing the rest with their "snacks"?

Sure, in the sense that they get 99.9% of their calories from "snacks" and 0.1% from photosynthesis.  Any contribution that photosynthesis makes would be an insignificantly small amount.

Photosynthesis has a very low energy production rate, relative to animal metabolisms.  We're talking multiple orders of magnitude, here.  It's just not meaningfully possible for a large multicellular animal to generate any significant proportion of its own food supply via photosynthesis.  There's a reason plants just sit there and don't go walking around.

Unless, of course, you want to get all sci-fi with it, such as

4 minutes ago, suicidejunkie said:

Solar-catalyzed fusion

[RoadRunnerAerospace]

2 minutes ago, Snark said:

Sure, in the sense that they get 99.9% of their calories from "snacks" and 0.1% from photosynthesis.  Any contribution that photosynthesis makes would be an insignificantly small amount.

Photosynthesis has a very low energy production rate, relative to animal metabolisms.  We're talking multiple orders of magnitude, here.  It's just not meaningfully possible for a large multicellular animal to generate any significant proportion of its own food supply via photosynthesis.  There's a reason plants just sit there and don't go walking around.

Unless, of course, you want to get all sci-fi with it, such as

would the fact that they are 60% of our size change anything?

[Snark]

5 minutes ago, RoadRunnerAerospace said:

would the fact that they are 60% of our size change anything?

Nope, not to any degree that matters.  Remember, we're talking multiple orders of magnitude here.  Photosynthesis does not work for animals.  Really.  Not even close.  If it did, they'd be doing it already.

If a kerbal were human-sized, but shaped like a thin sheet of paper so they had a human's surface area but weighed only a few ounces, and if they went around completely naked and spent all their time sunbathing, then they could live on photosynthesis, as long as they lie still all the time and never move.

But then they wouldn't be a kerbal anymore, they'd be a banana leaf.

[RoadRunnerAerospace]

hmmmm.... Any reason why they would be green though? 

[Snark]

14 minutes ago, RoadRunnerAerospace said:

hmmmm.... Any reason why they would be green though? 

Protective coloration?  Mating display?  Poor hygiene?

There are plenty of green animals.  Just not any photosynthetic ones.

[RoadRunnerAerospace]

camouflage maybe..... maybe

[Snark]

Or maybe kerbals are actually blue (or red, or purple...), and it's just that there's an economically robust cosmetics industry on Kerbin that has managed to convince everybody via a dedicated decades-long marketing campaign that Green Is Beautiful.

"There's no beautiful like KerbCorp beautiful!  If you're not using KerbCorp Algae Cream to 'release your inner green', you're not looking your best!"

 

[RoadRunnerAerospace]

hmmmm... how could we tell if they are or not.....

[SpookyShark73]

3 hours ago, Snark said:

Alas, the math on that just doesn't work out; there's simply not enough energy available from photosynthesis to fuel a critter that can move around on its own power.  And by "not enough," I mean not enough by orders of magnitude, even if you make some very generous fictitious assumptions about the efficiency of kerbal photosynthesis, or the radiant flux of their sun.

There's a reason why plants have elaborate fractal shapes and very thin leaves to generate scads and scads of surface area for the least possible biomass, while having a metabolism so slow (relative to animals) that they just sit there unmoving.  And why the biomass of plants in any ecosystem has to be many orders of magnitude bigger than the biomass of animals that it can support.

Photosynthesis is hard.

However, we don't know the exact physics of the Kerbol System. It is possible that Kerbol gives off insane amounts of radiation that the Kerbals are resistant to through evolution. This would mean that Kerbals might have a much more advanced photosynthesis system that converts the energy of radiation to a Kerban version of glucose (or something like that). Who knows what secrets the Kerbol System is holding...

[NewtSoup]

In the beginning there was the word and the word was Snacks.  Actually there was the Great Snack Tray.

So in the very beginning there was the Great Snack Tray and it was held by the Heavenly Hostess.  

Ok, Ok, In the very, very Beginning there was the Heavenly Hostess.  

She carried The Great Snack tray through the empty snackiverse.  

Realising she needed a light so that she could see the people who would need her snacks she said "Gi's a light pal" and there was Kerbol.

Kerbol was good and it was warm and burned if you touched it so she hung it very carefully at the centre of the snackiverse.

Next she took a great courtesy pillow and from it fashioned first Kerbin and then the other planets.

Finally she took one of her snacks, it was made of green cheese, probably some sort of Sage Derby or overly ripe Stilton.  

This cheese she gave arms and legs and as an afterthought a head too and set it upon the surface of Kerbin along with a second for company.

These cheese forms just lay there and showed no interest in the snacks she had to offer.

Displeased she cast a rock at Kerbin which created great storms for many centuries.

By and by a lightning bolt hit the cheesy constructions and they was given life.

They looked up at the Heavenly Hostess and said "I'm Hungry!"

Satisfied she bestowed her snacks upon them and named them Kerbals.

Before leaving her creations she gave them a mission to explore strange new worlds, seek out new cuisines and to boldly go where no Kerbal has gone before.

 

Edited July 24, 2017 by NewtSoup

[MrWalrus123]

My theory (which is similar to matt's) is that a species similar to Kerbals had colonies all over the Kerbol system, as an experiment, they placed creatures similar to them (think of humans and chimps) on the only planet they had not inhabited in their system to see how they could evolve, Kerbin. They hoped that not only could these creatures create a civilization that they could interact with, but one that could also be their successor.

Eventually the large civilization collapsed as their planet got flung out of it's original orbit... casted out into the great vacuum of space. And with that, the proto-kerbals evolved to create an "intelligent" civilization.

This explains all of the easter eggs, as well as the possibility of laythe's oceans

The monoliths where markers and observers, imprinted with the ensign of the civilization.

Fast foward to modern Ferbin, the Kerbals find these monoliths around Kerbin, and they become a symbol of exploration (not knowing of both the kerbals and monolith's origins)

[MiniMatt]

Clearly cartilaginous - the g-forces vast numbers of their species are regularly subjected to by incompetent rocket scientists* surely forgoes any bone based skeletal structure.

They must be flame retardant too because.... well let's just say we've extensively tested this. Perhaps some kind of organochloride physiologoy.

And (most of them) are extremely happy. Like, all the time.

 

So. Earth. Summer of Love. 1967. Lots of lazing about in music festival fields reduced the evolutionary pressures for a rigid skeleton. At the same time a surfeit of joss-sticks advantaged selection for fire retardation, and an abundance of THC imparts care free fun into the atmosphere. Lunar Orbiters 3,4, & 5 distribute this chemical soup off-world. Kerbals evolve. They multiply. They explore, and they explode (in hilarious ways).

 

You want to know where Kerbals came from? Look in the mirror! (or ask your parents)

(or your grandparents)

 

* that'd be me. And you. Yeah you heard me. You monster. How many kerbals have you exploded today?

[Kerbal pancake]

They must have long tounges

[Casualnaut]

21 hours ago, Snark said:

Or maybe kerbals are actually blue (or red, or purple...), and it's just that there's an economically robust cosmetics industry on Kerbin that has managed to convince everybody via a dedicated decades-long marketing campaign that Green Is Beautiful.

"There's no beautiful like KerbCorp beautiful!  If you're not using KerbCorp Algae Cream to 'release your inner green', you're not looking your best!"

 

...

18 hours ago, MrWalrus123 said:

My theory (which is similar to matt's) is that a species similar to Kerbals had colonies all over the Kerbol system, as an experiment, they placed creatures similar to them (think of humans and chimps) on the only planet they had not inhabited in their system to see how they could evolve, Kerbin. They hoped that not only could these creatures create a civilization that they could interact with, but one that could also be their successor.

Eventually the large civilization collapsed as their planet got flung out of it's original orbit... casted out into the great vacuum of space. And with that, the proto-kerbals evolved to create an "intelligent" civilization.

This explains all of the easter eggs, as well as the possibility of laythe's oceans

The monoliths where markers and observers, imprinted with the ensign of the civilization.

Fast foward to modern Ferbin, the Kerbals find these monoliths around Kerbin, and they become a symbol of exploration (not knowing of both the kerbals and monolith's origins)

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! To be honest, this topic is about a realistic approach towards kerbal anatomy and origins. What did they look like? How did they evolve? What caused the Kerbal Life Explosion?

Edited July 25, 2017 by Casualnaut