Survive That Attack!

[MaverickSawyer]

I'm in a tank. What wall?

I then shoot the next poster with the main gun on the tank.

[ax1212]

My belly absorbers the blast and the shock wave hits the next poster

[Designer225]

I was on a plane and the shock created a recoverable turbulence.

Then, for reason unknown, the wing hits the next poster.

[The Destroyer]

I am Chuck Norris. I grab the wing and sharpen it to a blade, and throw it with deadly accuracy at the next poster.

...Beat that.

I betcha bruce lee will come

[ramnrmeul]

You hit the Kraken Drive I just made with the blade. The blade activates the drive, bringing your wing blade along with it while accelerating at a rate of 10000m/s/s until it impacts the next poster at a velocity of 2.9*10^6 m/s an inordinately long amount of time later. The sort of velocity here leaves very, VERY little time to react due to lightspeed delay.

[Designer225]

The drive accidentally

...

The drive hits the next poster, having slowed down considerably.

[ramnrmeul]

It actually hits my neutronium building in the Gamma Quadrant which contains an Iconian gateway. I use that gateway to transport a deuterium-antideuterium bomb weighing 30 pounds (10 pounds of which is the deuterium and antideuterium) to the next poster's current location. I then close the gateway. The next poster now has one second to escape before a catastrophic explosion occurs (said explosion will probably have a high enough energy to make a 100-mile wide crater on the surface of Earth). If you don't know what most of what I'm taking about is, go watch some Star Trek: Deep Space 9 on Netflix.

[MaverickSawyer]

I do know what you're talking about, and use a transporter to both freeze it in time (from the bomb's perspective as it get placed into the transporter buffer) and then kick it FAR away from Earth... onto the next poster.

[Accelerando]

I'm in a lighthugger moving at 99%c, so I move out of the 100-mile range within .6 milliseconds.

While slowing down to my next destination, I release a cloud of probes to survey the system ahead of me. Moving at .1c and with a mass of 5kg each, one probe is headed toward the next poster to impact with something like 2e15 Joules of energy, or about 500 kilotons of TNT.

[The Destroyer]

The puny probes bounce off my shields, going to the next poster.

[mikeman7918]

I deflect it with a duct tape shield that I made out of duct tape that I stole from MacGyver, and the probe bounces off harmlessly. I then hire MacGyver to construct a weapon of mass destruction out of the probe debris and use it on the next poster.

[MaverickSawyer]

Being a fan of both MacGyver and the Mythbusters, I create a bunker from duct tape, and ride out the attack unharmed.

I then create a duct tape cannon and shoot the wreckage of the probe/WMD at the next poster.

[mikeman7918]

I evacuate the universe in an inter-dimensional Escape Pod^TM and when I decide it's safe, I re-enter the universe in the exact location of the next poster. No amount of duct tape can save you now! (Unless it I'd 4D Duct Tape)

Edited March 5, 2014 by mikeman7918

[ax1212]

I use 75.8D duct tape to survive

the next poster gets hit with my 92.2D rock

[MaverickSawyer]

I use Captain America's shield and a spare Iron Man suit to bat away the rock.

I then throw the shield at the next poster.

[Deathsoul097]

I call in a Titan from TitanFall, which lands on the shield as it flies towards me.

I fire a rocket cluster at the next poster from inside the Titan.

[Dark Junior]

IIIIIIM Back.

I block the Rockets with a Paladin shield from final fantasy 3.

i Throw kurt kerman out of a rocket at the next poster

[mikeman7918]

I block him with Samhat Kerman (I love that name) and then I press a button that says "do not press" on it. The consequences of me pressing the button effect the next poster.

[mythbusters844]

A pie appears out of nowhere and hits my face at mach 1; fortunately I was wearing a face shield.

I then throw the face shield at the next poster at mach 12

[Deathsoul097]

I deflect that face shield with a baseball thrown at 0.9999999999999999999999c. (For the effects of which, look here: http://what-if.xkcd.com/1/)

Unfortunately, the resulting thermonuclear explosion destroys me, but on the plus side, the next poster has to deal with a fusion powered thermonuclear explosion.

[mrrpamplemousse]

Vault Tech saves my ass again.

Now the user below have to survive the nuclear wasteland.

[Dark Junior]

I send the nuclear wasteland to another dimension.

I fly a Imperial star destroyer at the next poster.

[mikeman7918]

I hit the ball and I use my trusty warp drive shoes to complete 10 home runs AND escape to the opposite side of the world before the explosion hits me. The next poster is on the opposite team as me and is in the general area when the explosion hit, and the worst part is: you lost the game 0 to 10...

[Tidus Klein]

I restart KSP after the CRASH before it could auto save.

I then send 10 million whack job sized super missiles in the next posters direction..... ENJOY!

[Designer225]

They all miss... by 7-23 miles.

The debris that caused created a cloud of debris raining down on the next poster.