Make a wish... and have it horribly corrupted!

[Agent30632]

Granted, now 3chan exist and is equal to 4chan

I wish for the kerbal system to be true

I'm not sure you'll wanna corrupt that...

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but the star was actually a rouge star traveling at a sizable fraction of the speed of light, dragging its planets along with it. Kerbol also just happens to be on a collision course with the Sun

I wish that I lived on the ISS.

[Designer225]

Granted, you are now living in Interplanetary Space Ship.

I wish that the universe explodes...

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but it all comes back together in the Big Crunch

I wish that Dubstep was Wubstep.

[chobit-389]

Granted, but by a unicorn!

I wish more people would hug me

[Rockcoole]

Granted but it slowly poisons you with ever hug.

I wish that the vogons didn't destory the earth.

[Needles_10]

Granted. A rocket which Jebediah Kerman designed does instead. (Hey, it flew outside of Kerbol's SOI and into the Sun's!)

I wish that the Kerman Brothers appeared in my apartment without a rocket (because they were on break in the Dish Lounge inside the Tracking Station (and that is not "canon")).

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but they quickly fashion a crude rocket out of the things in your apartment, and try to go home to Kerbin using it. However, they do not realize that the Earth is 10 times bigger than Kerbin, so the rocket it much too small and they fall back and crash into your apartment.

I wish that chobit-389 had a epik battul between the new hoopy frood with a towel, chobit-390.

[Needles_10]

Granted, but they merge before the battle ends. chobit-779 emerges.

I wish that chobit-389 and I could collaborate on some Kerbal Space Program Artwork.

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but it burns the eyes of whoever dares look at it.

I wish that my neck would stop hurting,

[chobit-389]

Granted, I've just broken it~<3

I wish for a rebuilt Yamato class battleship

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but it isn't waterproof.

I wish that I would stop dreaming about cheese.

[Rockcoole]

Granted, you now dream of rain.

I wish that I will pass my exams.

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, you pass the exams through a paper shredder.

I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish I wishhhhhhhhhh35634534500111110111011111 ERROR:4581 ERROR:4581 ERROR:45-

[Rockcoole]

Error 404: Wish granting not found

I wish that I knew the question to life the universe and everything.(the question that gets you 42 I should point out.)

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but the mice extract your brain so they can sell the question within for ludicrous amounts of money.

I wish there was KSP career mode.

[107zombiekiller]

granted, but the devs asked activision to work on it so the game became a terrible FPS.

i wish the VAB was taller.

[0jam3290]

Granted, but now it is only 1 meter wide.

I wish for my own personal working Dalek suit.

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but it rejects you and self destructs to avoid further contamination.

I wish that I had a cute plushie of the Slenderman.

[Mekris28]

Granted, but due to some unfortunate accident, your Slenderman plushie is coated in mud.

I wish for a Tenor Saxophone.

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but all it plays is the Epic Sax Guy song.

I wish that you could get sick with a computer virus.

[POTKC]

Granted, but it spreads... (Insert Organ Music Here)

I want a pet Jeb!

[tygoo7]

Granted, but he ran away with a NASA intergalactic rocket and ran into the sun before you could see him...

I wish that I had a pig that was immune to every disease, was immortal, I could see him, he's BA, his name is Porkohantas, he has a saddle so I can ride him, his favorite food is bacon and butter, and he is the king of Uranus.

[Rockcoole]

Granted, he also hate you.

I wish that Bacon was free and limitless.

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but this sets of a bacon-related resonance cascade, causing all matter in the universe to be replaced by bacon matter.

I wish that we would land on Mars already